Nick Roder's The First Crossroads
I see Macom the lightning-sheep, with Team Eevee in tow, slowly make their way away from the room neighboring the laboratory and up the stairs.
I manage to catch the attention of the pink-cat “espeon” named Arimis, for she looks back and gives a warm smile to me. I return the smile and wave back, but d’Alin, the water-cat “vaporeon,” seems to catch sight of this and whispers something to her.
I catch her giving him a stern look as they disappear up the stairs, followed by the ice-cat “glaceon” by the name of Althi and the fur-deer “sawsbuck” that is larger than even I, Pirth.
Well, I can't get everyone to be fine with me. And I should be sure to not call him sawsbuck. “Super-leafeon,” whatever that might mean, I remind myself.
I turn back, close the door shut, and announce to the dreepy, “I believe an expedition is being mounted to bring Drew back.”
Much to my disappointment, the dreepy’s reactions are still suppressed, so I do what I know will at least make one of them happy.
“Avarice~!” I call out in singsong while walking back to my workbench under the shimmering purple and red light of the “lanterns” installed on the walls and heating up the various flasks in my laboratory. While I have heard that I am able to create 108 such flames, the total in use both within my laboratory and throughout the basement to provide light is no more than thirty.
Avarice, of course, appears beside me, and as I sit down I open my hand.
While before I would instinctively summon then unsummon one of the strange, esoteric flames I managed to control – how I was able to manipulate the oxygen and create some sort of igniting spark in this body I knew not, but I was certainly not going to chalk up such a thing to something as fantastical as magic – since the arrival of Drew and his cohort of Sins, the dreepy known as Avarice frequently took the flame’s place.
He lazily places himself onto my palm and – after winding up my arm and ensuring the far wall was bereft of any equipment I could potentially damage – I throw Avarice. Although my hearing still, much to my annoyance, has not yet returned, I can practically hear the “Wee!” Avarice yells out.
I open my palm once again, and sure enough Avarice slowly returns, nestling himself between my claws, ready for another toss.
I do this absentmindedly, over and over with my free right hand as I use my left to turn the ink-studded pages that I made sure to treat with my phosphoric fire retardant, which left them with a parched yellow hue.
I turn my attention to the creation that Linoone had brought to me some weeks ago, shortly after I lost my hearing: the admixture of Sneed Oil and Cornn Syrup, the combination able to distort minds and render those who consumed it susceptible to illusions and control. I read the notes spread out before me in my mind:
The effect it induces in pokemon is something similar to the alchemic reaction Sirs Koysamore and Lopval discovered before the civil war broke out some twenty years ago, but Linoone said that alchemy never existed where he was from, so it’s wholly new to the world from which most former humans within this guild originate.
I take in a deep breath and turn to my own musings. Was I the only one from Terra? I know the massive iron-raven known as Percival claimed to be a knight, but not only was his dialect wholly off, he had not even a basic knowledge of the Chivalric Code. Percival was no more than a pretender like the Lost King’s son, and for that I had no stomach for interaction with him.
I blink, throw Avarice once again, and return to the notes before me:
The alchemical process properly named the Koysamore-Lopval effect seems to be halted by raw Moo Moo Milk, and yet there seems to be a significant shortage of this within Capim Town.
On that note, Linoone insisted on shortening the name to “Koyslop” instead of the longer, proper name; although it seems wrong to so heavily bastardize the names of such noble alchemists almost equal to Merlin in genius, it made Linoone laugh heartily, so who am I to say no to a friend?
Before I am able to turn the next page to review my notes, I feel a tap on my shoulder. I turn to see Envy, tongue poking through her closed mouth and her cheeks red with blush.
“Ah, of course you’d like a toss, Envy. Come and-”
“No,” came the response. “I- we were wondering something, Ikarus…”
We? I look past her and see the other dreepy staring intently from the workbenches they were splayed over. Even Sloth managed to prop his eyes open a smidgen. What might this be about?
“As I said already, Envy, the Guild is working on recalling Drew; I’m sure everything will be fine.”
“No, we were wondering – and I speak for everyone except Pride, obviously,” starts Envy, though I can’t help but quickly glance at Pride who just blinks at me, though somehow I felt this blink was more concerned than usual.
Can blinks be concerned? Am I able to-
My thought is immediately interrupted by a sharp prick from my finger. I glance at my hand to see Wrath chomping down.
“Wrath! I said no biting!” I use what I’ve read is closely analogous to the move “thunder punch” – although the most I can muster is charging ions beneath flasks and, in this instance, letting out a small shock – on Wrath, who releases his bite and says, unsurprisingly, “fuck you!”
Before I can respond in turn, Envy once again reappears before my face. “Ikarus, I asked him to. You started to stare off into space again and, since you need to look at us to listen, I had to get your attention somehow.”
I feel both my heart and ears droop. So I’ve hurt Wrath for no reason?
I look at him and see a wince of pain on his face. Against my better judgment I sigh and say, paired with the extension of my index finger, “my apologies Wrath… I suppose I’ll let you bite me once… bereft of retaliation.”
Wrath lets out a rare smile and quickly rushes to my hand, but the bite – while still impossible to ignore – is nowhere near as painful as usual.
By God, not as painful? Something must be wrong with these dreepy.
I return my full attention to Envy and she says, “we were wondering… why do you take care of us?”
I see only a genuine expression of concern reflected on Envy’s face, so of course my only thought is, by the heavens, these dreepy must be on the verge of death if they’re acting so unlike themselves.
After a moment’s hesitation, I say, “I don’t believe I’ve ever told you of my first foray into the Clover Guild, have I?”
The weak “no” responses from them all prompt me to elaborate.
“Well, I arrived shortly after what’s been called the ‘Summer Festival.’ Some pagan holiday, perhaps. Why exactly I wound up here I know not, nor do I recall how I ended up discovering the Guild, but I was fortunate enough to have discovered a note left by the previous alchemist that she had ‘joined a travelling caravan,’ meaning there was a perfectly suitable role for me here.
“Despite the Guild not having an alchemist at the time, I was not warmly received,” I said as I let out a side glance at Lust.
“Cyndaquil, as you know, was the root cause of such a poor reception, but that little terror actively made things worse. He had approached me and asked for concentrate of… if I recall correctly, ‘salazzle pheromones.’”
Immediately I see Lust’s eyes sparkle and I raise to her the hand that does not have Wrath clamped down it.
“No, Lust, I will not make more. As I was saying, apparently Cyndaquil saved whatever coins he could scavenge and hired a salazzle to come over and provide a sample. Apparently not even a prostitute will bed him.
Regardless, I was happy to oblige and capture it, for the whole thing was new experience to me, and while I did manage to make a concentrate, I also – like any alchemist worth his four elements – preemptively made an antidote. Or counter-potion. Whatever you might call it, I made sure to inoculate myself with it.
“I knew somewhat of Cyndaquil's reputation, but I didn’t know the effects of salazzle pheromones back then. Thus, I opted to follow and observe when he doused himself in it the very moment I handed him the concentrate. When a passerby had asked Cyndaquil why a pinkish smoke was visibly emanating from him and Cyndaquil told them, their terrified reaction told me everything I needed to know.”
“Long story short…” I start to say before I see that Lust appears much too engrossed for my liking.
“Cancel that, long story especially short: Cyndaquil managed to use it on some unsuspecting guild member, and I immediately doused the room in the antidote and banned him from my lab. That poor pokemon, however, swiftly decided to leave the guild.
“I wasn’t punished by the guildmaster, but the news that I had made a ‘love potion’ for Cyndaquil spread like a wildfire and forced me beside his ranks.
“Few others were really kind enough to even hear the nuances of the situation, so I was essentially left to my own devices here. And as you all know, my subsequent attempts at making creations all backfired spectacularly.”
“So,” starts Envy, “what does this have to do with us?”
I let out a snicker and say, “well, forgive me for rambling. You know how much I love to share my stories and-”
“Get on with it!” the dreepy cry out in unison.
“Yes, but of course. I told myself that I wouldn’t allow what happened to me to happen to some other new member. Why, that’s the reason why I prioritized recalling the species of the new members rather than the older ones; they I can actually help and they’d feel fine talking to me before my reputation inevitably proceeds me…”
I let the thought simmer for a moment before I continue.
“Although I longed to be a knight, as someone born into peasantry, alchemy was the closest I could get to serving what remained of the Round Table. Nonetheless, the Chivalric Code was something I hoped to adopt, knight or not. Actually, it’s based on the teachings of ð’Alchemica Triquetra which I had learned quite early when I became an apprentice so-
“Ikarus,” says Envy plainly, trying to keep me on track.
“Ah, yes. Well, one such rule of the Code was to aid those less fortunate than yourself.”
I turn my attention to the other dreepy and say to them, “it just happened to be my luck that the only new guildmembers to have appeared between my own arrival and New Year’s was Drew Peacock.”
The dreepy laugh at the mention of the dragapult’s full name, but since I can’t quite ascertain as to why, I ignore them and continue.
“So, when he asked me to ‘hang out’ I obliged, though I quite rapidly tired of him. But such a chance was not only mandated by the Code, it was also what I wished had been given to me at all. And when he declared he’d be rid of you seven to go on his little adventure, I instead offered to take care of this roguish little heptarchy so that your fath-.
“He’s not our father!” comes the reply, also in unison.
Hehe, they still take the bait every time.
“But you actually take care of us,” says Envy, “you seem concerned about us…”
“Well, I truly have no issue with you seven. Perhaps excluding Lust. But regardless, I did not say I would tolerate your existence, like Drew does.”
Honestly, the more that I consider it, the more I realize that he is downright neglectful...
“Nor does the Code dictate anything about caring for the literal manifestation of Sin. In fact, were I truly following the Code, I’d be obligated to kill each and-”
“Ikarus,” says Envy once more, with her eyes beholding more than just a hint of annoyance.
“Right, right. I said I would take care of you, especially since I do see some good in you little demons, even if it’s hidden deep within.”
I shoot glances at all seven and promptly correct myself. “Very deep within. And I would be remiss to turn away from you as I had been turned away from. Code or not, it’s what is right."
I let out another snicker and admit, "and it certainly does help having some assistants here, even if you all seem to be quite melancholic at the moment. But! I cannot blame you considering your collective restlessness at Drew's absence...”
At this I look at them and see they have been exchanging looks. Then, a single dreepy steadily floats to me, then two more, and finally three more until – before I know it and much to my surprise – I am surrounded in a quiet hug by five sans Wrath and Pride, and I feel the fires around my neck involuntarily burn brighter.
As I make sure to hold Lust in a hand before she can try to slowly float her way downward from my chest towards places I’d rather not let her near, I look at Pride who, floating and watching, simply provides a blink that somehow has an air of contentment.
As for Wrath, I see him slowly drift towards my snout with a peculiar look on his face. I realize that I only ever explicitly forbid Lust from kissing me, for I was never concerned any other would even try, much less Wrath. Astonished, I try to speak but I manage to only stutter out nonsense.
Wrath, however, instead bites my nose and I let out an involuntary yelp and by instinct smack him away, causing him to fly across the room laughing.
This slap causes me to accidentally hit Lust and Gluttony, who both start to berate me. Envy, not one to miss out on the fun, joins in. Sloth floats away, half asleep and scanning for a place to lie down. Avarice asks to be thrown yet again, his energy seemingly renewed.
And Pride, still floating and watching, merely blinks. This time, however, I try to not interpret it. I instead focus on the temporary return to normalcy these devilish dreepy have and, although it is undoubtedly chaotic – as is to be expected by the manifestation of the Seven Sins – with a small laugh I admit to myself that this heptad has grown on me…