National Dex Pokegraphic: Prologue

Take A Look It's In A Book
By the creator formerly known as Iron Valiant-anon (Invalid Value-anon)

The college senior recalled that he was in the three-story-tall, old, historic campus library in the early evening while the sun still cast down even the slightest glow, which was protected by red brickwork so old that it was almost brown today. 

There he remembered the endless bookshelves, all made of dark stained oak, built like a maze-like literary catacomb. He thought of the assistant staff workers, who looked like zombies and just wanted the day to end so they could go do anything else. 

He thought of the sharp, stinging smell of cleaning products on weathered window panes and the allergy-inducing cling of dust that drifted lightly in the late afternoon's sunbeams. He recalled the sound of the computer lab, full of antiquated technology that was getting harder to use every day, and the somber humming of electricity within the ancient hardware in place of today's smartphones and tablets. There was the sound of desk chairs shifting against old carpet, so ancient that even mold refused to grow on it, and the somber click of outdated mechanical keyboards in need of a thorough cleaning. 

The library had some function, at least, as he wondered about the thousands upon thousands of musty old books that filled it in defiance of the march of technological conveniences that have consumed the medium. These countless books of all genres stood vigil all around him as he wandered this mausoleum of literature.

The one thing he could not recall was his initial motivation for being there. He scarcely recalled making the trip there. Was he there for textbooks relevant to his studies, or was he there to simply browse until he found something that tickled his fancy? His journey was devoid of a goal, as if he were drawn to the library by a spirit of fate that demanded his presence. 

He followed this mysterious drive to wander the library further upstairs, into the lesser-known reaches of the antiquated book collections. There in the library's darkest, most forgotten nooks, he caught the shimmer of a golden cover that was slightly askew. It practically beckoned him to approach it in its shrouded resting place. 

The golden presence of the book yearned to shine brilliantly and resist the lack of light in that dim corner like a beacon. He walked up to it and ran his pale fingers carefully over its golden spine, adjusting his glasses as he closely examined the tome with near-sighted vision.

It was covered in what appeared to be hand-crafted gold leaf on a metal backing, but it had no title or signature. Gently, he eased the book into his hands. It resisted and scraped against the shelf it was resting on with all the friction it could muster, as if the student trying to extract it was exerting all of his strength to shift a stone monument after thousands of years to solve an ancient puzzle that concealed a great treasure. 

The brilliant metal structures that framed its edges like a picture frame continued the pattern on the cover. The front and back have the most oddly subtle embossments of what appear to be paw prints or other animal-derived designs on a strong leather backing. Danging from the book was a cord bookmark with a small talisman at the end that resembled the incisor of some long, extinct creature. The most outstanding element was right in the middle of the cover. It was an abstraction of a sphere divided into a northern and southern hemisphere, with a smaller circle in between them within its own recess. It appeared to be, if he didn't know any better, that symbol was a... 

No, that would be absurd! This book had to be older than that dumb series of video games.

The student shook his head at the idea, rejecting it as a mere coincidence, and attempted to open the intriguing book to see what was inside. He labored to push the side clasp open. 

It refused to budge, even a little. 

He scowled for a while in exasperation. Perhaps there was something in his dorm room that might let him pry the lock free without destroying the book. He felt compelled to make the decision to conceal the book in his schoolbag and smuggle it back to his dorm. It seemed improbable that the book even belonged here, as there was no way to open it so the front desk could scan its serial code, assuming it even had one. In that brief moment, he felt like a criminal who pulled off the world's greatest heist as he made the mysterious tome his own.

The young man eventually returned to his dorm just in the nick of time before curfew, casting off his jacket, glasses, and backpack before sprawling out in bed exhausted with his purloined tome, not even sure why he stole it outside of some very encouraging invasive thoughts. He decided he'd rummage around in the morning for a way to open the book. He soon succumbed to the weight of his fatigue and fell asleep with the mysterious book in hand. 

Not long after, he dreamed of his future career in wildlife biology. He recalled his childhood passions that led him to this point—animals and creatures, both real and fictional—bolstering his imagination and aspirations. Everything from cartoons to video games and movies stirred a deeper respect for all kinds of animals. He dreamed of seeing, interacting with, studying, documenting, and even protecting the creatures of the world, despite all the odds against his success and their survival that encroached on them every passing day. He crassly reminisced about the countless bad jokes and memes that circulated on the internet amongst people he barely knew who encouraged him to take the world in stride. He dreamed, and then dreamed some more. 

He dreamed of opening that damned book.

The distant blowing of the wind, rustling of vegetation, and chirping of birds or some sort of other creature that belied definition filled and ehcoed the aspiring zoologist's ears. The natural world sounded especially vibrant and loud to him. 

He raised his arms to blot out the noise and cover his face to get just a few more minutes of shuteye before being forced to tackle another day of the semester, only to find the feeling of very soft fur cushioning over a very alien face. 

He cracked open his eyes in alarm and gasped as he pulled back his arms, quickly darting his vision all over to take in his new surroundings.

Sitting up in a panic from the ground, he found himself situated on a path of soft grass over an expanse of greenery, with tall, thick trees threatening to blot out the cloudy blue sky above with their arboreal majesty. His eyes, ears, and nose were filled with a complex medley of senses that he had never experienced before, and he was overwhelmed by it in a rush of sensory overload.

He could see unrecognizable shapes dart through the shadows between the trees around him. He heard a cacophony of exotic sounds from every direction that strained his knowledge of every bird, beast, and insect he could think of. He was so certain he could smell the sweet tinge of berries and fresh water just out of view. 

Everything he felt and saw was unassisted by glasses, hearing aids, or any other human creation. This was all within his own being's power. He looked back at the beastly limbs he was struggling to recognize as his own arms, shaking with anxiety.

This was still a dream; it just had to be a dream. It was a dream that felt all too real and lucid. That is what he told himself over and over.

The scholarly youth decided on the tried-and-true method of pinching himself to bring himself back into the waking world and promptly yowled like a cat or other feral creature as he experienced what felt like daggers piercing his flesh. He then remembered that pinching yourself was not, in fact, a tried-and-true method but an expression of disbelief. 

He was very steeped in disbelief.

He quickly looked to what might have happened in his state of panic and took in the fact that his arms were replaced with stocky, muscular, white-furred appendages that ended in red-furred forelimbs and paws with three digits consisting of a thumb and two long and deadly claws, all tipped in a black keratin that shined like the sharpest of obsidian blades. 

A small wound pierced his bicep from where he had unwittingly driven his sharp claws into himself. He couldn't fight the compulsion to lick at his injury, cleaning at it with a rough feliid tongue, which gave him a passing feeling of comfort and peace as he nursed at his cut. He was almost obsessed with the action and was taken to his own little world until the wound stopped bleeding. He jerked his head back upon the realization of what he's debasing himself into and gazed around in a fit of embarrassment to see if anyone or anything was watching.

"This is absolutely bonkers... This can't be real. Just what am I? WHERE am I?" He spoke to nobody in particular, as the stress was beginning to boil within him. He grimaced as he heard his own voice, which had become rather gravelly and rough, as if he were in fact some sort of predatory animal trying to mimic the capabilities of human speech. 

He had sometimes wondered how he'd sound with a rougher voice, and the one he was expressing right now wasn't exactly his top pick. He growled before slapping away at his cheeks, paying extra attention to avoid jabbing himself with his claws again in an effort to focus. This situation was beyond definition. He needed to find a proper reflection to evaluate the state of his being before deciding how to proceed.

The man-turned-creature slowly pulled himself to his thick legs that were shrouded in that familiar white fur, ending in three-toed feet that complimented the same count of digits on his forelimbs. He found himself moving unsteadily at first and was quickly exhausted by the balancing act after a few minutes. He assumed this probably had something to do with the extravagantly bushy tail that was coming out of his backside, which he had just recognized billowing behind him with practically a mind of its own. He needed to get a handle on all of this new anatomy quickly, and that included counterbalancing.

"God. Am I some sort of cat? A raccoon? A weasel? A badger? ...Wolverine from the X-Men? ...All of the above?" He ranted and groaned to himself as he resigned to walk on all fours for the moment, as being bipedal proved difficult at the moment. 

He prowled towards the sound and smell of water before stumbling a forepaw over something hard and angular on the ground.

It was that golden book from the library.

He picked up the closed tome with a puzzled look and examined it with a curious trill and chirp. He tried fiddling with the latch again, using his claws to get the leverage needed to pry it open.

The book finally opened for him. He quickly flung it open to find... nothing. The entire book was hundreds upon hundreds of blank parchment pages striated with faint lines for text.

The creature gritted his fangs and let out an irritated, breathy growl. "Of course... You lure me in with your mystical wiles back at the library and then whisk me the hell away to wherever this is in my sleep! I was going to graduate this year! I was going to tour the Amazon! How am I going to do that in the middle of nowhere as some sort of THING!? Damn it. Damn it!" He ranted and raved as he threw the book down on the ground, stomping and slashing at it repeatedly to no noticeable effect until he finally grew tired of punishing it. At that moment, no amount of glitz, gold, or magic was going to make him accept this blank tome into his life while he was transmogrified into some sort of animal while lost. He abandoned the book and continued on his way towards the water, continuously grumbling and whining to himself.

Before him was a shallow earthen ledge overlooking a wide and deep river. The surface was so blue and pristine that it reflected the skies above with picturesque clarity. He tried to steel his nerves and emotions. He had to know just what the hell happened to his body. Peering into the rippling reflection just on the river's shore, doing his best to learn how to steady himself upright, he studied himself.

Before him, he saw staring back a creature that resembled a hybrid of a wild cat and some sort of ferret or weasel. He was quite stocky in proportion, well-muscled, and rotund around in the middle in a way that made him think of a marketable plush toy. His body was adorned in a thick silvery-white coat of fur, adorned with red markings on his left ear and eye, along the center of his torso, and his forelimbs. They gave the impression of bloody scars from a distance and were almost intimidating, if not 'cool'. His tired green eyes looked back at him with predatory vertical pupils as his long ears twitched and pivoted to every sound. His blunted cat-like snout wrinkled its pink nose while a fanged muzzle frowned back at him. His large tail whisked behind him like a billowing cape, pronged by three long tufts of fur towards the end. Lastly, from a cursory and careful evaluation, he confirmed he was still male in both mind and body, despite his new form.

He ultimately felt quite rattled by the intake of information from the river's surface as he took a few steps back, rubbing his paws against his forehead to try and alleviate the onset of a nasty headache.

"I'm... I'm..." He stuttered his words as he stumbled backwards from the reflection, falling over as he tripped on something hard against his ankle and fell onto his back.

"What the hell am I?! Big Chungus's edgy OC?!" He blurted it out as he sat upright, looking around to find what had tripped him up just now. That book was there again; its gilded cover shimmered as if it were in acknowledgement. Didn't he just throw it away?! He quickly scooped up the persistent piece of wood pulp, leering at it angrily.

"Are you doing all of this? I think I had enough time playing Alice in Wonderland, The Wizard of Oz, or even Narnia! Why are you doing this, and what did I do to deserve any of it?!" He ranted at the tome. The book flung itself open as if to answer him, flipping to a particular page. Golden text filled the pages before solidifying into black ink, gracing the page with a flood of information.

The entry resembled an incomplete index form of some kind. It had only a scant few pieces of information in it. He began to read it out loud to himself. "No. 335, Zangoose... The Cat Ferret Pokemon... Memories of battling its arch-rival Seviper are etched into the very essence of Zangoose's body. This Pokémon adroitly dodges attacks with incredible agility." Several other boxes of information were utterly blank or filled in with a flurry of question marks, waiting to be discovered or written in by hand. 

Pokemon... Despite the influence that franchise had on his youth and respective career choices, it fell to the wayside in his pursuits, along with many things he originally assumed to be disruptive to his life goals. He looked at the little caricature of the Zangoose etched on the page with a feeling of malaise, like he had abandoned a part of himself, and now it had drawn him back in the most literal of senses. He flipped through the other empty pages again before returning to the only entry, the one of the species bestowed upon him in this unknown world.

"Are you wanting me to fill you out like in the games? Are you some sort of..." He paused to turn the book up and over as he examined it from every angle. "Are you like a Pokedex that needs extra effort or something?" The book didn't respond in any recognizable way other than an inkling in his mind that this is exactly what the book desired of him.

"You want me to find more creatures like myself and... document them somehow? Do you know how many of these creatures even exist?! There's maybe... a thousand of them now? And it just keeps growing! I don't think many of those are even able to be found outside of special circumstances! I think one of them is God! You ask of a fucking impossible pursuit!" He lowers the book down and casts a clawed paw at the sky. "AND WHERE THE FUCK EXACTLY AM I?!" The Zangoose slouched as he panted in exhaustion from frustration, anger, and fear. He was a stranger in a strange land, and he wasn't even in his own skin, seemingly concluding in his own head that an utterly silent book was telling him to document every single Pokemon he'd come across in this unknown world. He held onto the book tightly now, feeling less inclined to throw it aside after it had shown the futility of trying to abandon it, and it was the only thing giving him even a small clue of guidance. He needed the stupid thing, as it was the only closure he had right now.

He gently covered his face with his free paw, still trying to get used to not making drastic motions with his large claws always being a hazard. The Pokemon took a few deep breaths to try and gather whatever composure he had to spare in utter vain. He was on the verge of a mental breakdown and wanted to just sob there for a bit, maybe even curl up like a dog or cat, and just ignore the world around him for a bit.

"Hello, Mr. Chungusss, Sssir." A voice that practically slithered as it spoke came from behind him. The glint of a blade was caught in the corner of the ferret-like creature's vision. He quickly turned around in a newfound panic, which made him lose all concern for everything up to this point.

Towering before the so-called Cat Ferret Pokemon was a tremendous snake.

It has lustrous black scales accentuated by large golden hexagons that pattern its back at intervals. teardrop-shaped accents of gold ran parallel to every second hexagon towards the belly region of the serpent. Its body had purple markings reminiscent of the scar-like marks that covered the Zangoose.'s own body. Its face was elongated at the crown like a helmet, with three more golden hexagons adorning its forehead and each of its magenta eyes. A similarly colored golden jaw was slung under its muzzle, which gave way to a pair of very long fangs that radiated with the same color as its eyes. At the end of its body was a huge bladed protrusion on the tip of its tail, with one edge of the blade sharing the same color as the previously mentioned eyes and fangs.

The Zangoose was in a state of combined awe and terror. Herpetology was one of his favorite subjects. He simply adored all sorts of amphibians and reptiles, especially snakes, but the idea of being envenomed by a snake with no available antivenom made him feel weak just by imagining how agonizing a death like that would be, especially by one that seemed to have a literal sword on the end of it and fangs the size of daggers. Not to mention, if his ears weren't playing tricks on him, they spoke to him. Presumably, he could speak to it in return... He tried his best to address the first sapient being he had come across. 

"Wow... Aren't you the most beautiful specimen I've ever laid my eyes on?" He let loose the awkward, utterly unprompted compliment with the grace of a bag of hammers. He quickly covered his mouth with a free paw while still holding the book close to his chest. This was a sentient being, not a goddamn zoo exhibit! He tried to utter a follow-up but was internally dying from a mixture of emotions. "Erp! I mean, I..."

The snake leered at him with unblinking eyes as it flickered its tongue with breathy hisses before going on a serpentine tangent. "Why thank you! It'sss not common to hear sssomeone compliment you unprompted like that, of all thingsss! Now you're probably wondering why I'm here... It certainly isssn't for the accoladesss, but I wouldn't mind more. The name'sss Garrote the Cutthroat and Cutpurssse, at your ssservice, and probably dissspleasure. I couldn't help but hear you ssscreaming to the high heavensss in front of Arceusss and everyone that may be lissstening, so I dessscided to ssslide on over and sssee what the matter wasss. I notisssced you have a really ssshiny book over there in your little ssstabby pawsss... Now, asss you may know... You're a Zsssangoose, and I'm a Ssseviper, and our ssspecies has had a bit of a difficult hissstory with each other asss long asss anyone could remember. I am willing to accsssept that fancsssiful piece of literature asss reparationsss for what my people sssuffered at the pawsss and clawsss of your kind, and I'll be on my way! Now what do you sssay?"

The Seviper had what looked like several travel bags looped and strung around its neck and upper body, which more than one creature would probably need or own. The Zangoose wasn't certain any of those were the snake's personal property, given their hostile demeanor and how it demanded his book over some vague injustices he wasn't aware of. He also wondered how it even strapped those on with a body plan that lacked the necessary limbs and dexterity to begin with.

The Zangoose clutched at the book, as it was literally his only possession and possibly his guide to this entire situation he has found himself in. "Listen, Ms. Garrote..."

The Seviper scoffed and interrupted, holding up their bladed tail as if it were a finger asking for a pause. "Now jussst hold your Ponyta there! Do I sssmell like a female to you?! I am one hundred perssscent a ssscertified MALE Seviper! The nerve of you fussszzy Pokemon ssssometimesss, I sssswear! Jussst becaussse you don't sssee anything doesssn't mean it'sss not there!" 

The Zangoose slowly blinked at the retaliatory response. He opened and closed his jaws a few times, trying to think of a single response that didn't make either of them look weird. The very will to continue the conversation was robbed from him quicker than the book he had a tight grip on. The snake Pokemon's voice was androgynous at best and obfuscated any inherent orientation by what one could arguably call the fictional stereotype of a snake speaking with a hiss. Unfortunately, this wasn't a snake in some cartoon, and he had to try to unravel this social faux pas he wrapped himself in with the serpent.

"Okay... Sorry! I apologize, MISTER Garrote, if that is your name... But I'm afraid I couldn't give you this book even if I wanted to. I think you'll come to find it, and I are inseparable! I simply couldn't leave it if I tried! I'm not exaggerating either." He gave an awkward chuckle as he slowly backed away before realizing he was out of ground to maneuver on, overlooking the wide river behind him with a hint of fear. "Shit..." He grunted under his breath as he continued to watch the snake's every move.

"How unfortunate... Guesssss I'll have to cut it loossse from you, then! Feel free to drop it at any time, though, and I'll leave you be! Now, hold ssstill Zangoossse..." The outlaw Pokemon reared the tip of his bladed tail, lining up an attack before he struck outward repeatedly like lightning. The transformed human had barely any time to register what was happening before he felt his instincts pull him forward, making him roll with the proverbial punches as he weaved and dove under, over, and beside each attack.

Each time the blade struck the ground, it injected it with acrid purple toxins, which seeped into the surrounding earth and discolored it as it cracked and corroded beneath his feet. The Zangoose's eyes widened in fear at the implications of what may happen to him if he's cut by that blade.

"Come now. It will only sssting for a sssecond... You're a Zangoossse... Surely you can take a little poissson... I can't ssssay the sssame for my cutting edge, though! Now give me that book or I'll give you sssuch a ssslice!!" The outlaw kept stabbing and perforating the ground each time the Zangoose weaved and dove out of the way. The terrain cracked and crumbled as the integrity of the ledge began to fail.

Exhaustion began to set into the Normal-Type Pokemon's response time. With each dodge and leap, he found his muscles burning with fatigue. He was not used to putting in this much legwork either here or back when he was human! Quite frankly, he was a bit out of shape, and the new Pokemon form just did a good job of hiding it. He stumbled his next evasive step as the tail finally found purchase in the Zangoose's flesh. A painfully deep cut tore through him, afflicting his left thigh with purple-hued toxins. He fell over with a tumble, howling and crying tears of pain as he clutched at the injury.

The book dropped onto the decaying earthen ledge beside him, perilously close to falling into the river.

"It would have been easssier if you jussst handed me the book in the firssst place, Mr. Chungusss... But I'm a nice guy and hate ssseeing a grown Pokemon cry. I'll give you sssomething for your woundsss in exchange." The Seviper flicks out his tongue in a mocking manner. He reached out with his tail to scoop toward his side of the ledge before rummaging through one of his bags with his snout.

The book's gilded form shimmered as Garrote tried to abscond with it. There was a powerful compulsion for the Zangoose to act and retaliate in the tome's favor, despite it being the reason he's even in this mess. He felt his very muscles tense up as the poison coursed through his veins. He felt a strong motivation to stand back up and bare his claws as they shimmered aggressively with energy. His fur bristled on end, and he grinded his teeth in rage. The very fiber of his being burned, and it felt good. "GIVE ME THAT FUCKING BOOK YOU GODDAMN PIECE OF SHIT!" He cried out as he bared his claws and leapt forward, digging his bladed digits into the Seviper's body with outstanding strength and ferocity, hanging on for dear life as he buried himself into the opposing Pokemon's flesh like a stubborn parasite.

"HISSS!!! HOLY SSSHIT! YOU FUCKER! YOU ABSSSOLUTE FUCKER! DO YOU WISSSH TO DIE THISSS BADLY?! GET OFF ME!!! OH, SSSWEET ARCEUSSS!!!" The Poison-Type slammed the Zangoose repeatedly into the ledge with resounding thumps in an attempt to dislodge him.

The ground began to give way as the toxins from earlier had eaten into the foundation of the cliff beneath them. The Zangoose tried to speak in futility, as his claws had dug in too deep to let go. He was pummeled over and over into the crumbling earth with each solid thwack. "Wait! Stop! Agh! Fuck! AGH! MY FACE! PLEASE STOP! YOU'RE GOING TO BREAK THE GROUN-" 

The warning came too late, as the ledge collapsed. Both the Zangoose and the Seviper were swept up into the river by a landslide of debris. They were entangled in a melee as they were driven into more rapid waters until, unbeknownst to either of them, they were all cast off a waterfall along with that strange book.

The Zangoose awoke to the sound of rushing water and the deep chill of being soaked to the bone, as well as a deep ache throughout his body. He sat up and hugged himself with his shivering, sopping wet limbs as he struggled to stand on his battered and bruised body. The dark cave he had washed up in was faintly lit by some sort of subterranean luminescence that resonated from the deep pools of water that encircled him. Streaming waterfalls poured around the underground chamber like a curtain. He tried to make sense of the finer details around him in the chamber as his body continued to protest in pain and exhaustion.

"H-how am I not dead?" The waterlogged weasel weakly muttered to himself, letting out a harsh series of coughs. He slowly shifted through the room until he came across a familiar form slumped in a coiled pile a bit further in. It was the Seviper who assaulted him for that book, and he was either unconscious or dead.

"...Fuck. I didn't want this! I didn't want any of this! I just wanted you to leave that stupid book alone... Stupid magic book... Magic my... Magic my drowned ass." He bemoaned the awful situation.

He noticed several of the bags of goods were still looped around the serpent's neck. He decided to scavenge what he could from him. He undid one of the belt loops and examined the sack's inventory.

He found what looked like fruits that were turned to mush, some faded coins, a strange object resembling a large CD-ROM with a large fracture in it, an even stranger set of crystalline orbs, and what looked like a tree branch sculpted into a club or scepter of some kind.

He had not a single idea what most of these trinkets were, how they functioned, what they did, or if they could ever do it again to begin with.

"Great... Guess I'll just..." He lost any mental traction as he sat down. He found his rear making contact with an obstruction. It was the book once more. He picked it up and growled at it. "Oh, at least I'm not alone..." He held a pause as if expecting the book to answer back. "Same to you too." He flipped through the book to see if it had updated following his encounter with the Seviper, and it had. "No. 336... Seviper, the Fang Snake Pokemon... Yeah, that tracks. Seviper shares a generations-long feud with Zangoose. The scars on its body are evidence of vicious battles. This Pokémon attacks using its sword-edged tail." He closes the book and sighs. "Utterly trivial information... You really do need my help filling you out, Pokedex. Hehe... Ergh..." He enters another harsh coughing fit, clutching at his chest.

The worn-out former human found a relatively dry corner of the chamber to curl up in with the book beside him, wondering how it all went so wrong. He lays there for a while, hoping he'd dry off enough to at least sleep off the discomfort and maybe think of a plan for how to continue before the circumstances consume his will to live, coughing every once in a while. He eventually succumbed to sobbing to himself, the pain and despair being too much for him.

Another voice groaned out in pain, making the Zangoose perk up his head and bare his claws. The Seviper finally stirred. "Hooogh. Fucking ssshit. Ssstop crying already; you're enough of a mewling hatchling to wake even the dead! Keep your fucking book; I didn't know I wasss up againssst one of you poissson junkie typesss! Ugh, I'm sssorry! There, are you happy? I'm. Sssorry."

The snake rose up, twitching and fidgeting. "Oh, buddy. I'm definitely feeling ssssorry too... Hiss, you really fucked me up there with your clawsss... You might have hit sssomething important! Hssshahah ow... Oh, no, I'm ssseriousss. I don't think I can move like thisss. Never take up acupuncture, pal. You'll kill sssomeone with that kind of dissscipline.. I think I need sssome help here." He turned to face the Zangoose, who was looking a bit mournful and upset at Garrote's condition. He didn't want to do this to him in the first place! He might be some sort of snaky brigand, but he didn't want to hurt or kill him! He doesn't really want to do that to anyone!

The snake was devoid of any real ability to emote, but his voice was highly expressive. "Pleassse, be a real pal and look for an Oran Berry or two in one of my bagsss, will you, Mr. Chungusss?"

The Zangoose lets out a tired sigh as he uncurls himself from his balled-up form, looking a tad annoyed right now. "My name isn't Chungus. And while on the subject, I doubt your name is Garrote!" He stared at the Seviper for a moment.

"Bleh... You can honessstly call me whatever you want if it getsss you to help me! I persssonally find Garrote intimidating!" The serpent flickered his tongue out as he laid back down on the cave floor.

"I'll get you these... berries, but I don't think much survived inside your bags." He slowly stood up, still feeling unwell, as he wobbled back toward the snake and leaned against his body. The serpent lowered his head to face him and spoke up. "Hey now, don't get all touchy down there! I'm not a bench... This isssn't isn't a great time for breaksss, buddy!"

The ferret-like being looked up at the snake with irritation in his tired eyes. "Yeah, whatever. Sorry! I just have a cocktail of toxins in my blood that's trying to shut down my body. Maybe you're familiar with that?!" He coughed again into his wrist, looking at the purple fluids he left behind. "Oh... Oh that's lovely. You cut my thigh, and now it's somehow up in my lungs now..." He looks up at the snake again, on the verge of an utter meltdown, trying to hold back the desire to scream and cry in the face of possible death. "Am I going to die?!"

The Seviper shakes his head with a fang-filled grimace. He tried to alleviate the Normal-Type's worries, feeling some hint of guilt and concern, especially since he needed their help, and if they dropped dead on his watch, he'd soon follow. He didn't expect to be the one Seviper to run into the world's most emotionally overreacting and poison-vulnerable Zangoose. "Oh no, no, no! Nooo... Nooo... Nooo... Not yet. I sssmell a Pecha Berry or two in some of these bagsss. I... sssnag so many of thessse thingsss off byssstandersss and travelersss that I eventually jussst lossse track of what I'm acssstually carrying." He lets out a raspy laugh before stopping on a grunt of pain from his injuries.

The snake flicked his tongue a few times in contemplation as the mammalian Pokemon searched his bags for a variety of berries. "Not to pry, but I do love the gosssssip... You sssound and look like you're a bit out of your element. What ISSS your name, and what were you doing yelling in the woodsss?""

The Zangoose stopped, holding several berries in his claws. He thought about how to respond. "I feel like... I feel like you wouldn't believe me if I told you. And if you want my name, I'm giving you one that doesn't sound like you're out to kill everyone. And I better not find out that's exactly the case! I don't know a single goddamn thing about this world, and I don't want to be a patsy." He made up some names on the spot, feeling it'd be more fitting than their original identities, whatever those may be. "Mustel. You can call me Mustel. And you are, Serpes."

"Mussstel... and Ssserpesss... Interessssting pet name you got for me! Are we becoming clossse friendsss now that we're ssstuck in thisss predicament together?" The snake held his head mere feet from the newly nicknamed Cat Ferret Pokemon. The Zangoose sighed. "Friendsss sssshould be honesssst with friendsss."

Mustel sighed before breaking into another coughing fit. "Just... just listen! I'm a... I think I am... I used to be a human. They're a completely different species from what you or I are. I don't even know how I ended up here, and I don't exactly know why either. My best guess is that I think it has to do with that book you were trying to swipe from me, which is why I was willing to fight to the death for it. I found it only yesterday, and it... changed me into this Zangoose." He cringed as he waited for the snake to laugh and mock him.

"Oh, Giratina's sssweet dissstorssstion, of course you are a human... There'sss been ssso many ssstoriesss about thessse kindsss of encounters. Mossst of it sssoundsss like complete Taurossshit... But you might be making me a believer, essspecially with that weird golden book of yoursss ssshowing up back in your pawsss after it fell in the water, and it's not any wetter for it either." Mustel became less tense as the Seviper made him a little more interested in what he had to say. He looked at the book, and the snake was right. The book was bone dry despite everything.

The serpentine Pokemon cleared his throat. "The Pecha Berry... It'sss the pink fruit in your right paw, by the way. That will cure your poissson in two ssshakes of a Mareep's tail." The Zangoose sniffed at the fruit before gingerly biting into it. Upon finding the flavor to be very pleasant, he started eating it with more voracity. After finishing, he questioned the snake a bit more. "Tell me more about these other humans... I really don't want to be alone out here in... Whatever this place is, am I still even on Earth?"

The snake chuckled once more. "Give me ssssome of thossse blue berriesss you're holding, and I'll exsssplain asss much asss I can."

The Seviper regaled Mustel with folktales and legends about humans. What defined a human in this world was a vague abstraction at best that was confusing rather than confirming, as all self-proclaimed humans looked just like any other Pokemon. It all came down to things like amnesia or access to a wellspring of knowledge that sounded like the ramblings of the utterly insane to confirm anything. The Zangoose was familiarized with the fact that he was in a place known as the Grass Continent, situated on a world that lacked a properly defined name. Most called it the Pokemon World.

Mustel pondered this as he chewed on an Oran Berry of his own, feeling his aches subside a little. "You mentioned there's been more stories of my kind... LATELY... Where's it all coming from?"

The snake swallowed several berries whole, taking a moment to clear his throat before speaking. "There'sss a town called Capim Town. A guild over there isss believed to be chock full of them... It'sss perhapsss one of the worssst kept sssecretsss about the area..."

The Zangoose finished his snack, working up the strength and balance to stand on his feet. "I don't know if I should be asking, but... do you think you can lead me by there? And what does a guild do around there?" 

The Poison-Type stretched out his body, popping a few dozen vertebrae back into alignment as he moved his body in full. "I sssuppossse... But don't think we're completely on the sssame page just because I'm helping you out... We're ssstill inside a mysssstery dungeon and we may asss well work together given the circumssstances... Asss for what a guild doesss... They're goodie goodies that help people with their little tasssksss and errandsss for fame and profit... They're little more than merssscenaries playing it up as heroesss. Ssssome of thossse thingsss they do involvesss myssstery dungeonsss. Naturally, this leadsss to a lot of ssstoriesss of them working with humansss to sssave the world." Serpes rolls his eyes before he begins to slither along. "Take one of the nissscer bagsss off me. You'll need it for all the nick-knackss and treasssuresss along the way."

The Normal-Type does as he's told and retrieves one of the bags off of the snake. He stows that cumbersome Pokedex inside it and slings it over his shoulder. "What, pray tell, is a mystery dungeon?" 

The snake motions to a stairwell carved into the stone at the end of the cavern before speaking. "It'sss the only way forward, for one. I hope your ssshort ssspar with me let you sssharpen your clawsss. You're going to be fighting a lot of feral Pokemon down there until we find the exsssit." 

Mustel frowns. "Great. Just what I wanted to do... beat up on more creatures." He stowed as many extra items laying about that he produced while searching Serpes' packs earlier before making his way to the edge of the stairs.

"Better get usssed to it, buddy! Thessse dungeonsss crawl with creaturesss that look like your run-of-the-mill Pokemon but are mindlesss and sssoulessss beastsss that want nothing more than to make a sssnack out of you! They're one of the reasssons mysssstery dungeonsss are a myssstery. In you go!" Serpes gently nudged Mustel onward, and the Zangoose finally with great hesitance, agreed to proceed forward.

As Mustel and Serpes wandered the winding caverns, they struck their wave through many feral Pokemon and avoided perilous traps that'd threaten to disorient or inconvenience them. Each time a new species of Pokemon was discovered, the Zangoose was blessed with another starting entry for that creature.

Mustel stops at the end of a corridor, looking at a chamber full of pools of Water-Type Pokemon as they frolic and play about. The human was mesmerized by the variety of creatures, many of whom were immediately familiar to the former Pokemon fan. "Oh! A Wooper! And that's a Psyduck!" The creature took notice of them and immediately showed aggression, much to the Zangoose's fear and confusion.

Serpes flexed his tail blade, causing it to become viscous with poison. "And they're in the way of our sssalvation! I'm going to ssshow you why they called me Garrote!" He lunged into combat and began dicing up the creatures in a frenzy of strikes, bites, and water blasts.

The Zangoose simply stared in horror. "Oh my God, it's like one of those Chinese TikToks..." He extended his claws and reluctantly backed up the Seviper in battle with a whimper.

Accompanied by the ambience of dripping water and howling winds, the Pokemon took the opportunity to converse whenever they were able in between fighting ferals and navigating traps. The ferret-like creature started off by addressing the proverbial Phanpy in the room. "...So you're a career thief or something like that?"

The snake flinched in response. "Harsssh, I prefer being called a professsssional legerdermain! ...But yesss I've taken the hard track through life. You have limited career opportunitiesss without a pair of paws, much less any other appendagesss. Not to mention the ssstigma of being a Poison-Type... And well, the lissst can just go on and on! If humansss are what they are, you lucked out as a Zangoossse. I truly envy your predicament! And no, I've never killed anyone... Asss far asss I know." The Zangoose did his best to brush off that last part.

Mustel sighed, gently scratching the back of his head. "I don't know about being lucky. I was planning to get my degree in college while also participating in a program that'd put me on track for a potential career as a..." He realized the Seviper had no idea what he was talking about. "...I was working my way apprenticing for a job that'd give me the opportunity to work with... creatures in my world known as animals. They're like the feral Pokemon, just without the powers and about as smart as them. You could say I have a fondness for creatures in general." He gave off an awkward chuckle.

"Oh? Isss that why you called me beautiful when we firssst met?" Serpes seemed to tease. The Zangoose almost fell over in shock, catching his claws around a stalagmite to have something to lean on.

"Erm... Ah... Oh... Yeah, that was... Oh God, you remembered that... I didn't even know you were sapient." The Normal-Type Pokemon felt less than normal as he stumbled over his words.

"Ssso it's fine to call sssomething beautiful asss long as it'sss asss ssstupid asss a feral?" The snake further retorted with a mocking flicker of his tongue.

"Now you're just fucking with me!" Mustel covered his face with one paw in frustration and used the other to scrape along the walls to make sure he didn't run into anything.

"I don't do that on the firssst date, buddy!" If this snake could form a shit-eating grin, he would. The Zangoose shoved his head into his bag and let loose a muffled scream of anger.

This continued for a while as they passed several more floors, the two bonding and ribbing at one another as they found an unlikely comradery in the dungeon. Mustel and Serpes found themselves standing tall over a monster house of countless fallen foes, all thanks to a Grimer who dared to poison the Zangoose during their wild melee. The ability that was inherent to the Cat Ferret Pokemon allowed him to defeat everything with ease.

Mustel was soon caught stumbling about as the effect of his trait faded. He fell to his knees, grimacing and coughing violently. "Pe-Pecha Berry!" The snake quickly slid to his side and drew out the medicinal fruit from a bag with his maw, dropping it into his partner's mitts. Mustel ate the fruit ravenously, despite an overwhelming sense of nausea telling him to stop. It passed almost immediately once he toughed his way through eating the berry.

"You... You mentioned Zangoose are normally poison-immune... But I have... What is this called again?" He wiped off his chin as he stood up.

"Toxic Boossst. You have a rare ability that letsss you inssstead grow ssstronger when afflicted by poissson. I did not exssspect that during our little bout." The reptile gave the best impression of a shrug that he could without shoulders. "Asss for me... I wasss born with the trait known asss Infiltrator. Asss you might imagine, it makesss me sssneakier than the average Ssseviper. It'sss how I sssnuck up behind you."

Mustel looks at the chamber, now filled with plunder from all the feral Pokemon that were laid low. "Interesting to know... Probably something to note down in the book once we're out of here." He picks up a piece of fabric that was strewn on the ground. "Also, what's with all the junk we keep finding? I get the fruit, but... What's with this handkerchief?"

Serpes was actively sifting through the loot, shoveling what interested him with the flat of his tail's blade into his many bags. "It'sss money if you don't like it; it'sss a neat fassshion accessssory if you do! Thessse dungeonsss alwaysss have the most interesssting valuables... That ssso-called handkerchief you're holding isss a Power Band. Tie it onto yourssself and watch how much harder you'll sssend your foesss flying."

The cat-like Pokemon squinted at the cloth, trying to scrutinize anything out of the ordinary about it. It just looked like an ornate piece of textile with the emblem of a clenched fist on it. "I'd call bullshit if the fact I came here because of a magic book didn't blow most of my expectations for the future right out of the water." He tied it around his bicep and performed a flex, already feeling himself brimming with strength that wasn't there before. "That checks out... And there's more of these things just laying about in these dungeons?"

The snake finished packing up the last bit of valuable loot off the floor. "Yep. More dangerousss onesss tend to have better pickingsss. The way is clear, and my bagsss overflow. I can already sssmell the sssurface air once more."

The pair finally found themselves in a large chamber brimming with shining jewels, gems, and crystals. The west and eastern walls gave way to deep tunnels of water that continued into the dark. The sparkling stones studded the floor, walls, and ceiling of the cave. It looked like there was no further way to proceed. A massive, glimmering, opalescent, diamond-like gem was situated in the center of the room. Serpes slithered on over toward it with sparkles in his eyes. "Look at the sssize of this thing... Imagine how much we could pawn thisss baby for!"

Mustel looked around himself in awe. He wasn't very versed in minerology outside of what he knew about fossils. "The way these formations are clustered almost seems unnatural... That really big one looks like it was deliberately placed there to... What are you doing?!" He yelled out as the Fang Snake Pokemon was coiled around the giant gem, constricting it towards the base.

"I'm going to pop thisss free and then retire in my own little paradissse! You can come visssit. Now, come on, preciousss!" He grunted and groaned in frustration as he kept trying to twist the giant jewel free.

"That doesn't look safe." The human examined the chamber more closely and noticed something out of place. He walked toward a cluster of jewels near the entrance to the chamber and found a wooden sign that had fallen over at some point. 

He read the board out loud, realizing he found the strange text legible. "By the order of the Wigglytuff Guild, this chamber is off limits. The Echo Chamber is currently off rotation within the Waterfall Cave due to a dungeon shift. Please take the newly constructed exit behind the western waterfalls in the entry hall. Do not, under any circumstances, touch the giant jewel in the center of this room. This means you, Eevee." 

He tapped a claw at his chin trying to understand what the sign meant before it dawned on him what had happened. They had missed the exit at the very start of the dungeon. "...Oh fuck off. SERPES, I SAID TO STOP PULLING AT THAT ROCK!" He raised his arms in a combination of panic and outrage.

With a crackling of stone, the snaky thief had dislodged the rock. "Gotcha!" There was a long pause between them as the sound of rumbling stones, followed by rushing water, echoed down the tunnels around them.

Mustel lowered his arms slowly and covered his face with them. "I wish I was a Magikarp or something..." A massive deluge promptly washed them all away.

The last thing he recalled at that moment was being launched hundreds of feet into the air as he screamed in terror. He had no time to take in his surroundings as everything flew by as a blur of landscapes and buildings before something hard broke his fall on the descent back down, followed by a splash of very warm water. A voice he was completely unfamiliar with screamed out in pain before he blacked out. "MY HIP! NOT AGAIN!"

The Zangoose woke up bleary-eyed inside a dry chamber. He let out a pained groan as he sat up to find himself in what looked like a jail cell, resting on top of a hay bed. He found his book right beside him. He noticed from the opposite cell sat the snake Pokemon that he was uncertain if to call his partner or a menace. He tried to speak but groaned in agony as he realized several of his limbs were bandaged. 

Serpes waves his tail in greeting, also covered with lengths of bandages around his midsection. "Morning, sssunshine. I bet you're wondering what happened... To make a long ssstory ssshort, that cave isss connected to the hot sssprings not far from a place known as Treasssure Town. We got ssshot out of a geyssser, but thankfully we both landed on a relatively sssoft Torkoal." He rubbed at the bandages on his body. "The townsssfolk were very accommodating! Ssso accomodating that they arresssted us when I tried to explain everything... It turnsss out they had one of my old bounty posssters and they deemed you an accomplice. We've been in holding cells for a few days until they figure out what to do with us."

Mustel felt the bandages around his skull. What DIDN'T he break on his fall down? He was too tired to be furious at this point, and he was just glad they got out. "Okay... At least they were nice enough to tend to our wounds... I'm surprised I'm not in a coma or dead from a concussion based on what you're telling me... Pokemon are tougher than they look, huh?"

"You did pierce my ssspine with your clawsss not that long ago, Mussstel. I think we can put up with a lot of punishment!" The snake hissed back. The human shuddered in revulsion at the thought.

"Yeah, and I'm sorry... You look better, though! ...Relatively better! ...You didn't tell them I'm a human, did you?" The Seviper rubbed the back of his head and let out a hissy sigh of disappointment.

"I had to... Your book literally kept following you. That thing isss practically a part of you, and they demanded anssswersss. Come to think of it... Why didn't you just let me sssteal it from you when we firssst met and let me walk off thinking I had it?" Serpes pondered.

The Zangoose stared, looking like he was about to cry again. "I panicked and assumed you'd kill me one way or another over it... You were really intimidating at the time." He covered his face with his arms. "Just give me a break here, Serpes. I've been winging so many of my decisions up to this point that I'm not even mad we ended up in jail because of your fixation on that jewel."

The Seviper rolled his eyes and laid back in his bed. "Sssorry. I bet we're gonna be working community ssservice to pay off the damagesss..." He said dejectedly.

Suddenly, there was the creaking of a metal door opening just out of view. "BZZZZT! YOUR BAIL IS HERE."

The two jailed Pokemon both slinked closer toward their respective cell bars to see what was going on. Mustel spoke up first. "I don't suppose you have friends who owe you a favor, do you?"

The snake shook his head. "And basssed on everything you told me, no one until recently ssshould know you exist. I wonder who they came for."

They heard a new voice speak out further down from them. "FINALLY! My cock-shaped chariot awaits! See you here at the same time next month, Sheriff?"

"PLEASE DON'T," declared the mechanical voice from a moment ago.

"Call me cock-shaped one more time, and I'm telling Lliam you perished to a Machamp named Bubba." Yet another voice spoke out in annoyance. "Hold on a moment. I'd like to see another inmate if you don't mind." 

"BZZZZT! IF IT WILL GET CYNDAQUIL OUT OF HERE, YES!" The robotic voice pleaded.

Footsteps grew louder as a figure emerged into view. It was a Combusken in a scarf, bearing an eyepatch over his left eye. He examined the Zangoose closely and the book beside him, as if he were peering into his very soul and essence. He rubbed his chin in deep thought before speaking up. "Do you know what a 'dank meme' is?" He looked perturbed to have even asked this bit of trivia, asn if it was horribly out of character of him.

Mustel widens his eyes and grabs at the cell bars, immediately rattling off to the avian creature. "If I say yes, that I'm also a human, and that I also know what the internet is, will you get me and my partner in the cell behind you out of here?"

The Combusken raised a brow, seemingly satisfied with the reply. He glances at the cell behind him, giving the Seviper a concerned stare before shrugging. "I imagine you'll be very upset if I don't. Sure. Be warned, I'm also bringing someone along who's a bit... unique."

"Yoohoo! KFC! I'm getting loooonely~!" Cyndaquil called out from down the cell block. The Fire/Fighting-Type shuddered in disgust. "Grh..."

"He sounds... great. Doesn't he, Serpes?" The Zangoose looked at the snake with a defeated expression.

"That weirdo touchesss me, and no one isss finding the body." The Poison-Type threatened.

KFC shrugs once again. "I'll pretend I didn't hear that in a capacity that'd make you an actual problem. I'll see you all sorted out, and we'll be on our way."

They journeyed for a few days across the coast from Treasure Town to Capim Town, with very little of note having happened beyond a series of uncomfortable jokes and remarks from Cyndaquil towards everyone else.

Mustel sat by the town gate. He had most of his medical binds and wraps removed, save for the one around his head. A Luxray physician who gave him a final checkup in jail told him to keep it on for a few more days, and who was he to question a Pokemon with X-ray vision? He casually flipped through the myriad of new Pokemon his book had taken record of while scratching at the itchy wraps. He perked up as he saw Serpes slide along toward him, grumbling and hissing to himself. 

The Fanged Snake Pokemon looked to have been confiscated of all his pilfered loot save for his own personal treasure bag. He slumped down beside the Zangoose and let out a frustrated sigh. "Looksss like I'm going to be a liaisssson for the Clover Guild. What a fantassstic new chapter in my life."

The human-turned-ferret patted him on the neck as an awkward gesture of sympathy. "At least it's with me. You could have been paired up with someone who decided to make life hard on you. I'm sure we'll manage." The snake glanced at him with a budding glint of hope before laying back down in wait.

KFC and Cyndaquil finally arrived, with Cyndaquil following him in tow. The bird looked miserable as the smaller Pokemon laughed.

The Fire Mouse Pokemon wiggled his squinted brows at the pair. The chicken-like creature looked about ready to throw the other Fire-Type like he was a football.

"Well, Zangussy and Sevussy, are you two ready to experience the first day of the rest of your lives at the guild?" Cyndaquil asked excitedly.

"First of all, please don't call me that ever again. Second of all, please don't call him that ever again." Mustel raised his arms in front of Serpes' face as the snake Pokemon bared his venomous fangs at the small Fire-Type. "You two lead the way! We'll follow."

KFC forced Cyndquil along. "Do you have a death wish?" The bird asked earnestly. "Death wish rhymes with fetish!" The tiny pervert replied, much to the Combusken's continuing disappointment.

The new arrivals waited until their escort was a distance ahead before they followed. Serpes looked Mustel over, who was still obsessively peering over that magic book. "Ssso, you think sssomething wantsss you to keep filling that thing?" The Zangoose nodded with a little enthusiasm.

"If I can't use my academia back on Earth anymore, I'm going to try to make the best of a bad situation and start putting it toward documenting as many Pokemon as I can... Maybe it'll give me answers as to why any of this happened... But I'm not counting on it. From what KFC told us during our travels, the guild is chock full of people who just showed up one day or another and haven't had anything remotely resembling a goal as much as this book. I could just be working on this out of a strange desire... Maybe I'm just coping!" He chuckled weakly, rubbing at his face with a paw. "Coping."

Serpes pulled Mustel toward his side with his tail as they kept walking. "Lisssten, whatever you decide to do, I'll be there with you. Sssserpesss and Mussstel as a team! Our journey will be one that playwrightsss share for generationsss! And much like playwrightsss, we'll be charging everyone out the nossse for it!" 

The Zangoose blinked in silence as he was rendered momentarily speechless by the wild gesture. "Already fine with calling us a team, huh?"

The snake did his best approximation of a grin. "And asss a guild team, we need a name! I wasss thinking, Team Bitessslash!"" Mustel rubbed at his chin as he contemplated it. "Hm. What about Fangclaw? It's the same idea, but it feels more pleasant on the mouth to say." Serpes silently thought about it before nodding in agreement.

"Team Fangclaw, it is then!" Mustel happily declared. They both stopped as a massive building came into view. A three-story structure made out of the trunk of what was once a tree of titanic proportions. There were more Pokemon around the place than he could immediately recognize. His book was probably having a field day for each new species that was in sight. Some were heading off in small teams to unknown destinations; others were talking, laughing, yelling, and bickering; and many others were just lounging about. They watched as KFC and Cyndaquil opened the front door and entered, beckoning the snake and weasel to follow them inside.

"Don't let anything these morons say get to you. Something tells me you're not as obsessive about your weird human cultures as many of the ones inside are." KFC said this in reassurance.

"And let me be the first to say that I always ask for consent!" Cyndaquil added with a smile. He was forcibly shoved inside the building by the Combusken, who then awaited Team Fangclaw.

The Zangoose and Seviper gave each other one last look of confirmation before the duo walked inside the Clover Guild.