An Angel With Scales

Chapter 4 - REDACTED

“Do you think negotiations are going smoothly?”

She was back in New York. They were riding to the church for another lesson.

“I doubt it. They know that we can just take what we want from them, they’re just stalling for time at this point,” She replied. “They should surrender if they know what’s good for them. Less people would die.”

“I don’t think that they will surrender,” her squad mate mused.

“I know, that’s what worries me. It’s admirable in a way, I think, that humans are willing to fight so hard for their autonomy,” she mused.

“Was that a compliment I heard?” the other Daxy chortled. “I would have never expected the lieutenant to have such a high opinion of humans, what with the way you debate Elder Jensen.”

“Damn it. He’s been rubbing off on me, hasn’t he?” She only received a grin in response. “Ugh, I’m going soft, the next thing you know I’ll be citing scriptures and praying over dinner. The worst part is that it kind of makes sense in a way. Stupid bitch behavior brings stupid bitch consequences.”

“I’ve been reading the books they gave us, actually. The words are different from normal English, but the stories are interesting.”

“Yeah, I couldn’t get past the first few chapters, the whole ‘thee and thou’ terminology gets kind of confusing really quickly. It’s easier to just have the Elders explain it,” she grumbled.

“Yes, but the Elders aren’t always going to be around,” her squadmate chided.

It got quiet for a moment before they spoke again.

“What do you think will happen to them?”

“When talks break down, you mean?” She raised an eyebrow at her subordinate.

“Yes,” the special operative almost whispered.

“They’ll be inducted, I suppose. And then assigned.” She stated.

“The way they talk about marriage is beautiful,” the other Daxy sounded so melancholic “it would break their hearts, I think, to be denied it.”

She didn’t have a response. She cursed herself for sympathizing. A week or two ago and she would have blasphemed the Christian God to the Elders’ faces, but now it was starting to feel wrong insulting a being that was promised to love her. She knew that the Empire would take care of the men, but, having heard them testify so passionately about their religion, she doubted it would be a painless transition. She was sure that they would be loved with the Daxy. She steeled herself.

“I’ll tell you what,” she laid out her plan, “I’ve put in a request for Jensen. Once that’s approved I’ll push for you to get approved for White. Then we won’t have to wonder about them. We can show them the empire ourselves.”

Her subordinate stayed quiet, but nodded slowly, mulling the decision over.

“Y’know, I think I’m going to blow the Elder’s mind today,” she changed the subject, “I’m going to tell that one sister that I’m sorry about what I said the first time I met her, and see how he reacts.”

“I can’t believe this is working,” Allen groused as he killed the engine for what felt like the hundredth time. He was parked in a haphazard imitation of a t-bone collision with another car. He slipped into the back of the van and got under the blanket with Kess. “This has been the longest three miles I’ve ever driven.”

“Must we leave the windows open?” Kess asked, pulling him close again. At Allen’s behest, she wasn’t allowed to turn the electric blanket on.

“I’ll say it again, Kess, we need to keep as cool as possible, inside and out.”

“If I didn’t know better, I’d think you liked being held by me.”

“Don’t make it weird, Kess.”

“It’s ok to want physical affection. I don’t understand why you shy away.”

“Kess.” He took a forceful tone, knowing where the conversation was going.

“Why? Why won’t you just tell me what haunts you so we can fight it together?” Her gaze pierced him as she looked down from above, frustration tensed her frame.

A shuttle was getting closer overhead, forcing them into a tense silence. For a terrible moment the engine sounds seemed stationary. They sat there, still as the grave. After a few minutes the blaring sound of the shuttle passed over them, growing quieter in the distance.

This was the second close call since they started. Allen surmised that they needed to let the engines cool more between motion.

“Now isn’t the time, Kess.”

“We may never get another chance. And I can’t just sit in silence with you and not speak my mind.”

He didn’t know what to say. He knew it was a bad idea to accept this assignment with her alone. She was so earnest, and he knew the truth would break her heart.

“Is it me? Am I pushing you away?”

“No, Kess. It’s me. It’s always been me,” a heat burned within his chest, filling his heart with a courage he hadn’t felt in a long time.

“Kess . . . I’m a hypocrite. I’m an adulterer.”

Her eyes went wide and her posture slackened in shock. It was a look that filled him with shame, but he knew he had to continue.

“I have been most of my life.”

“ . . . With who? Who tempted you away?”

“Not with one, with all of them,” he said with a wry smile. “For whosoever looketh upon a woman to lust after her, hath already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I’m a lecher, Kess. My parents, God bless them, were beyond staunch in my upbringing. I didn’t even know what sex was until I was neck deep in porn at the age of 12. I just knew that it made me feel good, and that I wanted more.” He took a shaky breath. “When I found out what I was doing was wrong, I was so ashamed that I didn’t want anyone to know about it. I hid it from my friends, my family, and if I knew how I would have hid it from God. And then I just kept doing it.”

“You could have told your parents, they would have helped you.”

“My mother might have, but I was terrified of what my father would think. He was a man of exact obedience; he followed every commandment to the letter. But growing up I heard nothing but poison on his lips for those who fell short of his standards,” he wept, bitterly. “I loved my father, but I couldn’t stand the thought of him not loving me back because of something I had done.”

Kess was left speechless. The man she knew appeared to be falling apart at the seams, his careful facade crumbling to reveal a scared little boy.

Collecting himself he continued.

“For nearly 18 years I have had to remind myself not to look too long when I see a woman, because, if I remembered too much of an image, it will be her face that I’ll be beating off to that night. How disgusting is that?”

“What about your mission?” She asked in a small voice, barely a whisper.

He let out a strangled laugh. “That was the one time in my life I felt clean. The urges were manageable, and there was always some good work to be done to distract me. I had never felt closer to God than in those two years. I truly felt born again,” he looked wistfully at nothing. It was a burning silence, his heart felt both peaceful and frantic at the same time. He sniffed and looked back up at her. She looked like she was going to cry.

“I’m sorry, Kess. I can’t give you what you want from me. I can’t love you back. I’ve been lying so long I haven’t been able to really love anyone. I can’t even love myself-”

“Who are you to dictate what I want from you, Allen?” She inserted herself, catching him in his downward spiral. The question confused him and his face showed it as he looked back at her.

“But-”

“It’s true, I do want you to love me. But just as much, I want you to let me love you,” she asserted forcefully. “You made mistakes, Allen. You are wracked with guilt for holding yourself to a standard that is too high all at once.”

“The Lord set the standard, Kess, not me,” he sneered in bitter nihilism. “Be ye therefore perfect, even as your father in heaven is perfect.”

“Come unto Christ, and be perfected in him,” She fired back. “Did you honestly think it was your responsibility to save yourself? I know you don’t believe that to be true, you taught me better.”

“I’ve tried Christ! I’ve tried everything I know how to do to get him to take this away from me! He doesn’t answer me anymore, Kess!” He boiled the words out in rage and impotent self pity.

“No! He did answer, just not the way you wanted-”

“What answer!? What answer is there other than that I did this to myself and I need to get myself out of it? I’m on my own, Kess, help isn’t coming.”

“How is it that I, born a gentile, know your God better than you!? Help isn’t coming?" She asked, huffing incredulously. "Help is here! He sent me! Allen, you don’t have to sit alone in the dark, tortured by your sins. Someone already did that for you, a long time ago. And he would do it again. He forgives you, Allen Jensen, and so do I.”

“How?” He sat there, shocked. The words were everything he had ever professed to others. He had heard them countless times over the pulpit, but this was the first time he felt their weight used on him. “How can you just let it go?”

“You once asked me that if a man professes to a principle, but fails to uphold it, do you blame the man or do you blame the principle? Well, there’s an old Axillian proverb that I think the Lord would agree with. It translates roughly to this: If your mate falls prey to a snare, do you hate the snare, or do you hate the mate?”

“That’s not a fair question. What if the mate knew it was a snare, and fell in anyway?”

“Then the more devious the bait," she hissed.

“Even so, that doesn’t change what I am.”

“You just mustered the courage to confess your sins, Allen. You are stronger at this moment than you have ever been.”

“I’ll fail again.”

“I will be there to catch you.”

“Then, would you take me? Right here, as I am?” He looked up at her, broken and in tears, offering himself in return for the first time.

Her eyes dilated. A tiny voice in the back of her mind told her to do it, to take what she had worked so hard to earn. He would be happy with her, she would make sure of it.

“I would grind you into a shuddering puddle at our coupling,” she growled, hungrily. “But that’s not what you want. You would feel nothing but guilt afterwards. I would marry you first, if you would have me.”

“I’ll hurt you. I’ll betray you.”

“Nothing hurts more than watching you tear yourself apart. And if you ever find yourself longing for the flesh of another, I will consider it my failure.”

“No, Kess, it wouldn’t be your fault.”

“Is it not our covenant to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light?”

“How?” He repeated, clutching at his head. It took him a moment to collect himself. “How can you be so wonderful?”

“I was shown God by one of his beautiful sons, and I am forever changed.” her smile was radiant, like an angel sent to pronounce mercy from heaven.

His heart burned within him, and he felt a peace in his mind. It was a feeling he hadn’t felt since bearing testimony in New York.

For the first time in years, he felt the Lord.

“Then, Sivxel Kessex, will you marry me?” He offered the most half baked, unromantic, and sincere proposal he could.

Kess’ eyes shot wide open.

Her pupils contracted, and then dilated.

“You’re . . . you’re not joking with me, are you? Because I might actually cry if you got my hopes up for a joke,” Her voice was shaky and unsure.

“No jokes, I’ve never been more serious in my life.”

“No . . . No take backs. You promise?”

“I promise, besides, who else do I even have a chance with?”

“I’ll see to it you never meet them,” she glowed with a happiness he had never seen before. And he had made her that way. Perhaps there was hope for him after all.

“Can I? Can I kiss you?” She twitched with excitement, her claws gripping him closer in an almost uncomfortable tightness.

“Sure, I can’t promise it won’t suck. I’ve never really kissed anyone besides my Mom,” he chuckled, leaning to the side to provide her access.

“That’s about to change,” She brought her lips just inches away from his, then tentatively they closed the gap together. It was a chaste kiss, they shared each others breath as began to probe and experiment with different angles. Their breathing became heavy as it deepend, their lips sucking together as a fire was lit within their hearts. They were one, if only for a moment.

Allen pulled away.

“We should stop. Don’t want to do anything we’ll regret later,” he heaved out.

“I don’t think I’ll ever regret that.” Kess growled huskily. She practically had him enclosed within herself, like a cage.

“You will, Kess, if we go too far. You promised we’d be married first, and I want to keep that promise,” he groaned, his head pleasantly buzzing. He knew that if they started, he wouldn’t be able to stop, and part of him didn’t care.

She breathed deeply. He was right, but it felt like a waste when he had finally accepted her. She had dreamt of a moment like this. She wanted it. She wanted it more than any time before. The fruit was dangling before her eyes.

But she already knew the consequences. She could wait. She had to wait. She was better than this.

“You’re right . . . we need to get out of here first. But you’d best know that the first thing we will do when we get back is say our vows.”

“I think I need to talk to my Bishop first, Kess. I’ve got a lot to repent for,” He smiled.

“Very well. It will be the second thing we do,” She stated, seriously.

“And they are still at large?”

“That’s correct, Colonel,” the Major relayed to the holo display.

“Why wasn’t I informed of this sooner, Major?” A simple, direct question. The Colonel wasn’t pleased.

“It didn’t seem as serious until the wreckage was recovered, Ma’am,” she kept her eyes forward, her tone even.

“Two officers subdued non lethally and enough plastic explosives to clear a room. They’re definitely from Zion,” the Colonel made it sound obvious. “Was anything useful recovered from the blast?”

“Just enough to indicate some sort of antenna.”

“I suppose that’s to be expected, they know that if we find them, it’s over,” Colonel Braxys paused in thought. “What of the search? I understand you’ve detained several humans.”

“Aside from the usual riff-raff, we found a family of five. Two sons and a daughter. They claim to have come west looking for Zion, but never found it,” the Major supplied.

“They never will. Send them up when you catch the fugitives.”

“Understood. We have completed around 30% of the search, but there are a lot of places to hide in a city like this.”

“Follow up with your surveillance operative, she was the one that spotted them the first time, maybe there’s a pattern,” the Colonel commanded. “I also want you to complete your due diligence and assemble a profile of everything you know about the fugitives. I expect a report by tonight.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“I am assigning you priority to this task in my absence, Major. If you succeed, you will have my recommendation for advancement.” She stated in an even tone, with the quiet threat of the contrary hanging in the air.

“Yes. Ma’am,” the Major said, solemnly.

“End transmission.”

The line went dead.

“I still can’t believe you got played by a human,” Xeki snickered from her bunk in the med bay.

“I didn’t see you planning for what happened either,” Sylek grumbled through the gauze and plaster on her broken snout.

“Of course not, I was too busy planning my mating retreat,” the bandaged lizard sighed, dreamily. “Leave is hard to apply for around here, you know.”

“Talk less.”

“ . . . Soft scale.”

“Daft cunt.”

The doors to the med bay opened and a large Daxy in formal attire stepped through. The two patients jerked into salute.

“Major!” they both belted.

“At ease,” she replied, coolly, her green and gray scales shining in the steryl light. “I’m here because High Command has heard about your little skirmish, and they want me to fully debrief you now that you have received treatment.”

She handed them each a holo-display, powering up her own as well.

“Are we in trouble, Ma’am?” Xeki asked, nervously.

“Not if you cooperate. I need to know as much as possible about who you saw so that we can make a profile of our fugitives.”

“With all due respect, aren’t they just a pair of runaways, Major?” Sylek asked, confused.

“Negative. Runaways don’t have the equipment they’ve used.”

“Copy,” the ever serious Sylek nodded. “The Daxy looked like more of a swamp variant, similar to you, actually. Green scales at the frills and dark gray everywhere else. Probably white underbelly.”

“Definitely white underbelly, I could see it when she attacked,” Xeki inserted. Sylek gave her a sidelong glance.

“. . . Anyway, the human was male. Brown hair, I can’t remember his eye color,”

“It was brown, but kind of golden when the light hit it just right,” Xeki interrupted again.

“Anyway, he looked to be just around 180 centimeters tall with a stocky, farmboy look.” Sylek finished in a huff, glaring daggers at her bunk neighbor.

“That’s common, it’s going to be tough to find,” the Major breathed a long sigh. She flicked a few buttons on her holo display and turned to the two patients. “I’ve just sent you two a list of known individuals who match those criteria. I need you to narrow it down while I go talk with surveillance.”

“Yes, ma’am.” The two replied as she turned to leave.

She hated coming to this surveillance room in particular. It always smelled of stale pheromones and snack food. The walls and ceiling were covered in displays, showing different points of interest that their satellites were trained on.

“I want a promotion, boss,” the plump Daxy at the terminal said as soon as she got close, her lime green scales glistened with the different colors of the screens.

“I got you a promotion, Nesha, you’re a surveillance operative.” the Major replied flatly.

“Yeah, but in security I could at least stretch my legs every once in a while. This job is just staring at screens.” Nesha complained.

“You are very good at it.”

“ . . . Ouch.” Her half lidded eyes betrayed no emotion.

“Have you seen any movement?”

“Oh, I’ve seen plenty of movement, just not the kind you’re looking for,” She pulled up an image on the main display. The screen was awash with different colors superimposed over an overhead image of a city street.

“This,” the colors shifted to a bright ring of near white, “is when the device inside the house detonated. And this,” the map shifted to a different location, with a similar flash of white, “is where the shuttle went down. The best I can figure is that the shot came from somewhere over here,” She pointed a claw at a large building nearby with a tiny streak of white leaving it towards the crash. “The cold breeze and cloud cover doesn’t help with getting a good read either. I can’t really see where they went from there, just that they ran south for a bit before we lost them.”

The Major nodded along at her explanation.

“Exemplary.” she quipped insincerely.

“Just doing my duty, ma’am,” Nesha didn’t miss a beat, giving her a disinterested look. “Still, we are burning a lot of resources moving more of these satellites into geostationary orbit. Are you sure it’s worth it? Did the other techs even find anything?”

“They found some, just not who we’re looking for.”

“Guess that still puts me in the lead,” she smiled lightly, the curl of her lips never meeting her eyes.

“I may just promote you to Private with your current performance,” the Major glowered.

“Meh, just keep my pension the same and I’ll consider it. I need to catch myself a man after all,” she snorted. “Are we done here?”

“Page me the second you see something suspect.”

“Yes, ma’am," she replied as if she were promising her father to do her chores.

The Major walked out briskly. The surveillance operator idly swiveled her chair to and fro as she leaned back.

After a call with dispatch to confirm nothing new was found, she returned to the medical bay.

“No . . . nope . . . hmm, maybe, ah he has a tattoo on his face, nope.” Xeki hummed and hawed as she swiped through the queue. Her squad mate stayed quiet as she worked.

“How many do you have left, Private Mazix?” The Major asked.

“Four hundred and ninety three humans left on record to check,” Xeki stated, boredly.

“And you, Private?” She asked Sylek.

“Just eleven that look like they could be her,” She looked up in thought for a moment. “Xeki, didn’t the male have some sort of augment strapped to his right leg?”

Xeki clapped a hand to her forehead.

“Oh! That’s right! Let me add that to the filter. Right . . . leg . . . injury. Yeah, that narrows it down to five,” After a few more swipes, she presented an image to the Major. “This is the one! Allen Jensen, inducted in the battle of New York. He went missing shortly after.”

The major studied the picture quietly with keen interest. The young man was unconscious, dressed in a medical gown. She had to confirm.

“Show me the traitor files,” She turned to Sylek, who offered back the holo display. She scrolled through the eleven headshots of her former sisters in the empire. She stopped at one.

“This is the one.” She held a claw to the image.

“How do you know, Major?” Sylek asked, her eyes narrowed.

“Because I know these two,” the Major’s composed facade broke into a wicked grin.

Her pager started buzzing.

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