An illustrated guide to /tcgia/

https://dulst.com/pcgia

Introduction

/tcgia/ is /pcgia/'s unofficially official trading card game (except there is no trading -- all cards are made available to the players right from the get go). No real registration is required (the mail is not checked by Dulst, so have fun); however, the game is not entirely anonymous since you are identified by an username (you are already being stalked by Michiposter and [redacted] anyway). Username and password are case sensitive, just so you know.
Turn dark mode on, or get blind.

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Skip this section if you have experience with TCGs

You have elected for the way of pain, normie. TCGs involve players building decks of cards and facing off against each other in (1v1) matches which are generally determined by a mix of:

1. Deck-building ability
2. Decks' specific match-ups
3. Decision-making
4. Luck

Deck Building

Before playing, you'll need to assemble a deck adhering to the game rules regarding deck size and card limitations. You needn't worry about that: players are provided with a starting deck they can use as a basis, and rules about card limitations are enforced by the framework. If you have no experience with TCGs, you should first try out the starting deck, to familiarize yourself with the game's mechanics. Afterwards, you should copy-paste someone's deck list: building decks can be (more than) half the fun in TCGs; however, it can also be really overwhelming and frustrating at first. So don't be ashamed to copypaste from others. Everyone does so at all skill levels.
Skip to "Game Mechanics"

You should have skipped. Since the game doesn't give you any tips on how to build decks, here's some basic advice: anticipating a point which will be explained in due time, cards have a cost to be played, and, every game turn, you have some resources to spend (progressively more, as the game goes on). Provided that, there are two things you might want to keep in mind when building decks: given random draws, (1) how likely it is that you can spend all the resources you have available at any given turn; (2) what is the percentage of playable cards in your hand at any given turn. Putting it simply, you want to be in a position of making use of all your resources efficiently for as long as possible, and to have as many options as you can, to better adjust to the situation. This general deck-building maxim should be declined depending on what kind of deck you are playing.

Here is a dumb introduction to the core deck types provided by Chat-GPT:

1. Aggro (Aggressive) Decks:

Strategy: Aim to win the game quickly by dealing damage to the opponent as fast as possible.

Characteristics: Comprised mostly of low-cost cards that allow you to flood the field with creatures early in the game. These decks often run out of steam if the game goes too long but are very effective at overwhelming unprepared opponents.

Play Style: Best for players who lack any sort of patience and like role-playing as algorithms. Good for beginners (still, you actually have to think or you'll lose).

/tcgia/ Card Examples: Nasa Cat, Panko, Airi Dog.

Example

How to play? Click on the opponent's Oshi and avoid trades if not strictly necessary, that is, to keep your Airi Dog and Rie alive (and thus do more damage in the long run); if you have to trade, try to do so efficiently with Ember's debut effect and Airi. Finish off opponents using your Oshi power (pick direct damage), possibly through the effect of Neko Chibi Wemi, and by abusing Stimulant Providers more than Lance Armstrong.

2. Control Decks:

Strategy: Focus on controlling the pace of the game, gradually gaining an advantage over the opponent by denying them opportunities to execute their strategy.

Characteristics: Contains cards that remove or neutralize opponent's threats, and draw more cards to maintain hand advantage. These decks aim to prolong the game until they can play powerful game-changing cards.

Play Style: Suited for players who like to make others quit the game, and life.

/tcgia/ Card Examples: Yuri, Jelly & Lumi, Shiina Hermit Crab.

Example

How to play? Play conservatively until you can play your Shiinabots and multiply them using Dead Cat. Shiina Herbit Crab, Smug Wemi, Ember, and Nikki, can give you the time you need to set up a board which never truly blue screens. Once Shiinabots are on the board, you can truly start abusing your board clears (Alice, Yuri, Hime Cube) and gain incredible value. Cult Leader Lumi, Nurse Shiina, Venerable Ember, and Fish Launcher can also help you fix your Shiinabots when needed.

3. Combo Decks:

Strategy: Seek to win the game by executing a combination of cards that synergize extremely well together, often leading to a win condition that can be achieved suddenly and unexpectedly.

Characteristics: Built around specific card interactions or sequences that, when played, can turn the tide of the game instantly. These decks may spend early game stages setting up or searching for key pieces of the combo.

Play Style: Ideal for anons that have a passion for all forms of masturbation.

/tcgia/ Card Examples: Starknight, Pikmin Ember, Confused Pankophile.

Example

How to play? You want to have Soldier Airi Bean, 2 Stimulant Providers and 3 Gumis in your hand by turn 9, while still being alive. Drop the soldier on the board, make it into an helldiver (stuff the bean. Not with your penis; meds), and then use Gumis to direct it to your opponent's face. Basically a reverse guide dog situation. How do you do that? By drawing cards with Jelly/Jerry/Plankina while delaying your death using Smug Wemi, Alice, Nikki, I looove you (does not work IRL) and Kyoufuu Allback. Starknight + Kyoufuu Allback loops can make unprepared opponents think /pcg/ isn't so bad after all, so make sure not to throw your Stellar Ranch boys [citation needed] at Likers prematurely.

• There is no way to "Ramp" (get more resources to spend) in /tcgia/, so that type of deck is not listed.

TL;DR?

1. Include a good number of low cost cards (more than you think; this advice is recursive) and something bigger than Ember to finish off your opponent, you monkey.
2. Look for cards that work well together (promote synergy, like a boss). Tip: cards related to the same Oshi usually do!
3. To increase the likelihood of drawing the cards you need, most decks should include multiple copies of key cards. However, more copies of a card = less options overall; sometimes including even just 1 copy of a card might be wise, even though the chance of drawing it is not that high. It's all about the opportunity cost.

Game Mechanics

Like most TCGs, /tcgia/ follows a turn-based system where players draw cards from their decks, play cards onto the field, and use them to attack their opponent or the cards the opponents has on the field. Contrary to most other TCGs, /tcgia/'s turn-based system is rigid; that is, the opponent sits in the chair while it's your turn. Adding onto that, /tcgia/ has a really simple phase-structure, with only two phases per turn:

1. Drawing phase (you fucking draw, 1 card)
2. Main phase (you play cards and attack)

The lack of sub-phases lets players mix in attacks and playing cards. Use this to your advantage: the order in which you play cards, attack, and place stuff on the board, matters more than you might initially think. Note that the first turn is a bit different from the others, as there is an additional phase, the "mulligan" (see next section), and there is an asymmetry in starting hands between players to counterbalance the advantage of going first.

More info on combat, resource management, etc. are provided in the next section, where you'll be joined by sane individuals who dodged Blizzard's very own attempt at teaching kids' basic maths while stealing their money. They chose to donate their ancestors' income, blood and sperm to Egyptians Gods or bearded virgins instead (nobody actually ever played Pokémon and niche TCGs are for hipsters).

Skip if you have played Hearthstone Classic -- the games are similar (some useful images are here tho)

As per the section's title, /tcgia/ plays more or less like Hearthstone, the acclaimed (?) TCG published by Blizzard Entertainment. Hence, you can check a guide for that game on reddit, if you so prefer. Unironically, there are good resources for that game, so, if you have nothing better to do, that might not be a bad idea. That said, Hearthstone has added complexity, and thus not all the information will be relevant for /tcgia/. As a side note, Kolento used to be pretty fun in 55 BC.

Now, if you are beginner, you should start from playing, rather than deck building -- at least according to Wikihow and Kailash Satyarthi. Your goal is defeating your opponent, be it AI or a tard. You achieve this by bringing their (Oshi's) life points down from 25 to 0 before they can do the same to you.

As you can see, the board is really intuitive:

• 2 player sides. The board is divided into two halves, one for each player. Each player's side has cards slots and includes a portrait of their chosen Oshi, who represents the player in the game.
• Life points [1]. The players' remaining life points are displayed in the respective Oshi portraits.
• Creature slots [2]. Each side of the board can hold up to seven creatures. Creatures are cards that can be played from your hand, and they stay on the board to attack until they die (some die sooner than later; rip Yuri -- hostages couldn't save her). They can be chosen as a target for your opponents' attacks. You can place creatures wherever you want on your side of the board (creatures summoned through cards' effects, or by sacrificing your first-born tulpa, are always placed automatically to the far right, possibly as a form of discrimination).
• Resources [3]. To the right ("1/1" in the image above), you have the "mana bar", indicating the resources left available for a given turn (remaining/total). Each turn, you get 1 more mana point to spend, up to ten. Mana replenishes at the start of each turn, so, in general, you might want to use as much as possible, compatibly with your game plan. Tip: you can also see your opponent's resources. When they are about to play a card, it will show its cost. If they ultimately decide not to play it, it's free information for you. You can also use this to bluff, assuming that your opponent is a sperg.
• Hands [4]. On the bottom, you can see the cards in your hand (they are visible only to you, and to Michiposter). The cards outlined in green can currently be played; card's cost is displayed top left. To play a card, simply click and drag, provided that you have enough mana, space on the board, and eventual preconditions connected to cards' specific effects are satisfied. In general, cards should be considered a resource: keep that in mind especially when it comes to low level cards with strong effects, such as Kindling. At the top, you can see your opponents' cards. In theory, you have no information on them -- if not through cards' effects (not yet in the game), or because they were returned to their hands from the field; that said, if you have played with someone before, you might guess what they have in their deck, and count cards, as in any other card game for special kids.
• Decks [5]. Your deck is located to the right of your Oshi portrait. It contains the cards you've chosen to bring to the duel but haven't drawn yet. You can see the number of cards remaining both in your deck, and in your opponent's. This can be quite relevant, as, when a player runs out of cards to draw, they start taking burnout damage (better known as "fatigue"): 1 damage the first time and then it increases by 1 with each turn.
• Weapon [6]. Next to the Oshi portrait, there's some space for a weapon, if your Oshi has one equipped. At the present time (card pack 5), the only way to equip a weapon is by playing Rie. Weapons allow Oshis to attack, but they have a limited number of total attacks (with the further limit of 1 attack per turn), and Oshis take damage normally in fights (more on this in a moment).
• Oshi Power [7]. In this image, the Oshi power is hidden. It can be used once each turn, at the cost of two mana. The option appears by moving your cursor over your Oshi portrait. It is a good way to use surplus mana, and sometimes it can be more useful than playing cards.
• Graveyard [8]. /pcgia/ during dead hours. We don't talk about that. Don't click on it unless you own a datacenter.

While you'll spend most of your time looking at the board in the picture above, that won't be the first thing you'll see when starting a game. In fact, the first turn is a bit different from the others, as you will be asked to decide which cards to keep and which cards to "reroll". It is the so called "mulligan". It's free (just click on the cards you don't want in your starting hand), and its purpose is reducing the overall incidence of rng. As a rule of thumb, you want to keep cards which you can play in the first few turns (and cards which important given your overall strategy), and reshuffle cards which cost a lot.

Note that the first player starts with 4 cards (to mulligan) and draws 1 at the start of their turn, while the second player starts with 5 cards, a free Nasa Cat and draws 1 more at the start of their turn. This is an attempt to balance the advantage of going first (which also means potentially being able to play cards which cost more first). At the start of their respective first turns, players will be asked to pick one of three Oshi Powers:

• Summoning a Nasa Cat (1/1);
• Doing 2 damage directly to the opponent;
• Gaining 2 health (health over 25 is labelled "armor", but the difference is merely nominal).

The Oshi power can be used once per turn at the cost of 2 mana, as explained above. The choice of Oshi power is independent from the Oshi you chose to represent you, which is purely cosmetic.

Once the Oshi powers are chosen, the game proceeds by alternating players' turns. Players assume an active or passive role depending on whether it's their turn or their opponents', much like Likers. Players draw 1 card at the start of their turn; they are then free to spend resources (play cards, use Oshi powers), and attack their opponent or their creatures during their turn. As anticipated, the cards' mana-cost is situated top left, and cards that can be played are outlined in green. There are no turns' sub-phases after drawing, so actions-order is as flexible as they come. To attack, click on your creatures (or your Oshi, if you have a weapon equipped), and drag them to the target. In general, creatures cannot attack the turn they are played (unless otherwise specified), and can attack only once per turn (unless otherwise specified). Creatures that can attack are outlined in green, so there is no room for mistakes, unless you are colorblind, or Italian.

The 2 values at the bottom of cards/creatures, visible when they are on the field or when you move your cursor on a card in your hand, represent their attack and constitution (how much damage they deal, and how much damage they can take, respectively). When two creatures fight, they each deal damage to the other's constitution corresponding to their attack. A creature dies when it reaches 0 constitution, and it is moved to the graveyard. At the present time, there is no way to interact with graveyards through cards. All the worse for necrophiliacs. When a creature attacks a player, it deals damage to their life points equal to their attack. Attacking a player usually means giving up on gaining board control through advantageous trades. What is an advantageous trade? Let's say the opponent has just played an Erina (costs 5 mana, 6/3) and you kill it immediately by attacking it with your Airi (costs 3 mana, 3/3), then you have "gained an advantage of 2 mana" over your opponent. Quick math.

In /tcgia/ all cards are creatures (there are no traps, spells, or stuff, though some cards approximate them through their effects/abilities. See Yuri), so each card has its own attack and constitution. Still, there is much more to creatures than these two values, and players should focus on the cards' effects, which can be found in the body of the card, if you stop moving your cursor around like a cricket high on cocaine. Some effects (such as poison: "destroy any creature which is dealt damage by this creature") are common to many cards; as such, they have associated visual effects and/or keywords to make them immediately recognizable. Here is a list of all keywords currently in the game: feel free to ignore it and simply read the damn cards. The effects are fairly intuitive and plain. Doubts and exceptions will disappear magically once you start playing the game. Note that some abilities are targeted, same as attacks.

To recap:

• Top left, light-blue = mana cost (automatically displayed when in hand)
• Bottom left, lemon-yellow = attack (automatically displayed when on the field)
• Bottom right, red = constitution (automatically displayed when on the field)

With this, all the elements of the gameplay loop have been briefly introduced. When you are done using your resources and attacking, you can end the turn by pushing the button to the right. The turn ends automatically if you have spent all your resources and attacked with all the creatures which can. Against players there is a time limit for turns, so keep that in mind, and get comfortable with AI first if you don't want to be in a hurry checking out cards.

/tcgia/-specific informations & Dulst's interface

Here's Dulst, the site hosting the game:

"Home" is useless (in game, you might want to have one); you can check your cards and make/adjust decks in "Collection", buy card packs in "Market", and insult the dev, or post Toy Story Yaoi fanfictions in "Community". When you press "Play", you will be asked whether you want to duel bots or human-ish players. AI is fairly mediocre, but it can help you learn the game.

When a player first signs up, they are provided with a starting deck they can customize (more than one deck can be created, obviously; cards are shared), and enough thalers (coins) to purchase card packs. To have the maximum amount of playable copies of each card, buy 3x of each.

Building new decks in "Collection" is fairly straightforward: first you choose an Oshi (purely cosmetic), then you left-click or drag cards from your collection to add them to the deck. In general, only 3 copies of a card can be added, but there are exceptions for Rares (2 max) Ultra Rares (2 max), Epic Rares (1 max) and Nasa Cat (4 max). At the present day, present time, you need 24 playable cards + your Oshi to play. The interface will usually remind you when something is wrong, but it is a bit lass when it comes to the required number of cards, so double-check if you have issues queueing.

• Initial life points = 25 (can overheal through Oshi Power, but in no other way)
• Number of cards in the deck = 24 + Oshi
• Player 1, number of initial cards in hand, turn 1 = 4 + 1 drawn at the start of their turn
• Player 2, number of initial cards in hand, turn 1= 5 +1 Nasa Cat + 1 drawn at the start of their turn
• Number of cards drawn per turn = 1
• Max cards in hand = 10 (cards drawn afterwards are discarded automatically)
• Max mana gained per turn = 1 (mana fully refreshes at the start of players' own turns)
• Maximal number of creatures on the field on each player's side = 7
• Card types = 1 (creature)
• Number of different Oshi powers: 3
  • Summoning a Nasa Cat (1/1)
  • Doing 2 damage directly to the opponent
  • Gaining 2 health (health over 25 is labelled "armor", but the difference is merely nominal)

Additional Resources

/tcgia/-Hearthstone translation table

Rosetta Stone for the prototypical /pcgia/ caveman (level 2+ on Quora's sentience scale):

Suggested workflow if you are a newbie

1. Sign up
2. Log in
3. Play (vs AI) -- 1-2 times. Ignore everything else; take your time to check the cards while playing
4. Re-read the guide if you have doubts
5. Play (vs player)
6. Buy card packs (market)
7. "Take inspiration" from their list (or copy one from the examples above)
8. Create another deck (collection) -- keep the basic one to have something to fall back to in case the one you made sucks
9. Play (vs AI) some more until you feel good about it
10. Have fun! If you have questions we are here for you

Suggested workflow if you are a pro and literate

1. Sign up
2. Log in
3. Buy card packs (market)
4. Pretend to read what the cards do and make a deck (collection)
5. Play (vs player). Hopefully you get fucking rekt

Known bugs and how to deal with them

• You cannot queue vs players: if you interrupt queuing in any way, you get sent to Jumanji's jungle world (SEA), and cannot re-queue until someone plays against your ghost. The good thing is, if nobody plays vs your ghost, nobody is queuing at all, so you aren't missing out on anything. In short, it isn't a problem.
• Your opponent is AFK from the very start: see point above, just leave the game and re-queue. It's just an illusion, a figment. Take your meds. There is no leader-board, you don't lose money, and you don't get sent to the shadow realm [citation needed].
• Your opponent has suddenly stopped playing: it's probably desync. Servers died. Chat should still work: seek confirmation and get out. How? Cut the URL short to [https://dulst.com/pcgia], because refreshing doesn't work. (If anon doesn't answer, they might have had a stroke, so contact Michiposter. They'll send help to their address, assuming they are not homeless, Brazilian, WoW players, or -2 is included in the list of their top 5 favourite Riemann function zeros.)
• Your turn doesn't end automatically even if you have no moves available: just click "end turn", you handless retard.
• You cannot attack your opponent's creature: sometimes the game doesn't work as intended on mobile. Dragging can help. Often it doesn't. Buy a pc.
• You cannot attack your opponent: they probably have a creature with taunt on the field, or you are trying to attack with a creature with Haste you just summoned. In short, you are a fool.
• You cannot see anyone else playing: when players are in a game, they don't appear as "active" in the game chat. It's a pain, but you can just go offtopic in /pcgia/ with the power bestowed upon you by [spoiler]s.
• You cannot add cards to your deck: either you are Charlemagne (illiterate; not French, you fool) or you should refresh the page.

For general questions about the game system:
[https://dulst.com/overdulst/wiki/Frequently-Asked-Questions]
There is no fucking way you'll read it. Just rename decks to "delete:_" if you want to delete them. Obviously you keep the cards.

Acknowledgements

Every mistake, misleading statement and obsolete piece of information contained in this text is entirely Chat-GPT's fault (it isn't). The authors wish you enjoyable duels, buffs for your Oshi and a general lack of desyncs. I removed all the exif metadata, so don't waste your time. Buy Phase coffee.