A Race Against Time
The bright rays of sunlight peer through the scarlet and amber leaves, scattering light across the hiking trail. I stare down at my slightly worn boots, watching the beams of light dance in symphony on the otherwise blank rubber canvas. It was a little game to pass the time, and to take my mind off the throbbing pain in my feet and the fire in my lungs whenever I took a breath.
"Hey anon! Come on! You're going to fall behind you idiot!" the sudden noise jolts me from my mental deluge, as I reflexively rear my head up towards the source of my chastising. It was her. Kronii. My "camping partner" for the weekend. Despite her reputation as 'perfection itself' and her history for wearing flashy clothing, she was dressed quite humbly this afternoon. She wore a light blue parka, complemented by dark blue jeans and a pair of tanned boots.
"Hello? Earth to Anon, what are you spacing out for? Don't tell me you're tired already... I knew I should've dragged you to the gym with me." she let out a sigh and jogged towards me, noticing I was practically limping at this point.
"Y-yeah, well not all of us are immortal concepts born with bodies that have limitless stamina, you know!" I fired back in between heaves, each word scorching my chest. I swear I could feel cracks forming in my throat with how dry it was getting.
"Yeah yeah, whatever. We've only been hiking for an hour. Maybe if you stopped sitting at your computer all the time and got some exercise for once, you wouldn't be so brittle." she pulls my hand out of my left pocket and grasps it with her own. She pulls me forward and I stumble along, gladly relinquishing all physical control of my body and letting her do the-literal heavy lifting.
"This camping trip was your idea, you picked the spot and everything. So now that we're here we better make the most of it. I deserve nothing but the best." She was right. This was my idea and, it's my duty as a man. No, as her man, to live up to her lofty standards. I let go of her hand and stand still for a second, taking a deep breath to collect my thoughts. Kronii stops and looks back in surprise, but before she can utter another complaint, I smile back at her and break into a sprint.
"Last one there gets to put up the tent!" I yell back, leaving the flabbergasted warden in my dust. I know I was going to lose anyway, so why not make it fun for her?
I take off, cutting through the frosty Autumn wind that whizzes past my eardrums. The adrenaline courses through my veins as I hit my second wind, gliding along the rocky trail uphill. This was fun. I break out a smile as I continue to dash forward, not giving a care in the world when...
I hear it. In the distance. The booming sound of leaves being crushed and rubber colliding with earth. I kick it into second gear, ignoring the fire welling up in my legs and the sharp pain that came with every breath of air. I'm not running properly now, I'm putting too much force into each step - but I press forward. In spite of the pain, I'm smiling more than ever. Maybe... I could win? I did start the race close to our destination, if I remember the map correctly. In fa-
"Idiot. You picked the wrong person to race!" oh shit. I glance to my right and it was Kronii, keeping up with me just for the sake of rubbing it in - a proud smile across her face. She wasn't even breaking a sweat. Fuck, I was so lost in my own thoughts I didn't even pick up on the sound of her footsteps, now louder than ever before.
Picking up the pieces of my tattered pride, I yell back "Oh yeah? Watch this." I press against the ground and propel myself forward, exhausting every little modicum of energy I had left. Then, just mere seconds later, the scene begins to blur and tilt sideways. Weird, what's happening? Oh I'm p-
Darkness enshrouds my world as I feel my body leave me and my sensations dull. The once vibrant scene of multi-colored leaves and bright blue skies becomes a memory long past. My hopes of having a comfortable camping weekend with Kronii, sitting shoulder-to-shoulder around the warmth of a humble campfire and staring into the city landscape perched atop the cliffside, seemed so distant. And I soon find myself trapped in the shadows, with nothing but emptiness as far as the eye can see.
I open my mouth to say something, but I don't make a sound. I look down at my body, or where it should be, and there's nothing. Yet I am still awake and experiencing. The darkness fills me with an unexplainable sense of dread. It felt as if the vast expanse of nothingness, of void, was staring back at me. Reminding me of my mortality, my inferiority, just how little and insignificant I am in the grand scheme of life. Of being.
The silence is deafening. Robbed of all worldly experiences and stimulation, I am left in a prison of my own company. I am greeted by own mistakes and misfortunes. Reminded of my failures and errors. My idiocy.
Then, I feel for the first time. But it isn't a welcome sensation. It's cold. Even in the absence of any visceral, material body. I am cold. My soul is freezing. Again, this perplexing, almost hallucinatory experience avoids any discrete quantification. But it is chilling. The cold continues and worsens, until I can no longer bear it. I want to scream in defiance of this cruel reality. I want to find warmth. I want to find company. I want to live. But my wishes go unanswered. Cast into the void and never returned.
What feels like an eternity passes by. Does time even exist here? I can't say. It feels like I'm awake but asleep at the same time. The cold was no longer an unwelcome stranger, but has since become a part of my experience, almost as if it was integrated into my concept and being. I can't even remember what happened before this, and what little memories I had of myself and who I was were beginning to fade into obscurity. Was I young or old? Man or woman? Did I live a successful life, did I meet the expectations others had of me, was I a good person, these questions raced in my mind, with each being greeted by an unknowing silence. Finally, my mind settled onto a singular question, one that played again and again, actively eliciting an answer.
"Did I love?"
And it, too, did not find an answer. In the distance, I finally hear. The sound of a loud, monotonous, repetitive noise. Then, the sound of many voices at once, rushed and uneasy. Then, the sound of great sorrow, washing over me. And, finally, the suffocating sound of silence. Time was no longer by my side.