Help! I Was Just a Normal Guy Until Arceus Yeeted Me Into a Pokémon World, Gave Me No Skills, and Now I Have to Survive Using Only My Gamer Instincts as a Level 1 Charmander Accidentally on the Path to Becoming the Most OP Pokémon in the Multiverse (Also, Why Do So Many Pokémon Like Me?)

Bro, okay. So, get this—I wake up, and I’m not in my bed. Hell, I’m not even in my dumpy apartment anymore. No ceiling, no walls, just a whole lotta grass and a sky that’s way too blue.

Oh, and I’m a Charmander.

Yeah. Let that sink in. One second, I’m binge-watching anime and eating cold pizza. The next? Bam. Tiny, orange, and one step away from accidentally lighting myself on fire.

So, obviously, I do the normal thing: SCREAM. And not like a little yell, I mean full-on existential crisis levels of screaming. But guess what? Instead of my regular, manly, human voice, it’s all raspy and lizard-y. Like, EXCUSE ME???

Anyway, while I’m busy losing my absolute mind, someone taps me on the shoulder. And when I say someone, I mean this smug-looking Meowstic in a tattered cloak, giving me the most “I’ve seen things” expression you can imagine.

“Ah, another one,” he sighs, like this is just another Tuesday for him.

And then I notice it. The eyes. The demeanor. The sheer overwhelming aura of “I was a salaryman in my past life.” Bro had main character energy turned up to 100.

“Welcome to the Clover Guild,” he says, like that explains anything. “My name’s Lliam. I assume you were human once?”

I nod, still trying to process that I now have tiny, clawed lizard hands. “Y-Yeah?”

He just sighs again. “Figures. Come with me.”

I don’t know why, but I follow him. Maybe it’s the sheer confidence. Maybe it’s the fact that I have no idea what else to do. Maybe it’s because, deep down, I know that every isekai protagonist has to join a guild at some point.

As we walk, I take in my surroundings. Turns out I’m in some kind of forest, but it’s got that weirdly cartoony aesthetic, like something straight out of a video game. Which, uh, yeah, makes sense. Because before I can even ask what’s going on, Lliam drops the bombshell:

“This is the world of Pokémon Mystery Dungeon.”

Bro. What.

I immediately drop to my knees (which is weird, because, you know, Charmander anatomy) and scream again. But Lliam just keeps walking, because apparently, he’s used to this.

Eventually, we reach this super cool town called Capim, where all the buildings look like they were carved out of massive tree trunks. It’s got that old-school fantasy village vibe, but, like, Pokémon. And at the heart of it? A big treehouse-looking hideout—the Clover Guild.

Inside, a bunch of other Pokémon are chilling. And here’s the kicker: every single one of them? Former humans.

A Togetic rocking back and forth in the corner, hyper-focused on sorting berries? Autistic and vibing.
A Cyndaquil who is way too enthusiastic about Lopunny? Absolute coomer energy.
A Ribombee so small I almost step on him? Tiny, but terrifyingly efficient.
A Duskull who casually twirls a Switcher Wand like it’s a fidget spinner? Definitely hiding some power.
A Chespin who glares at a passing Glaceon and mutters “damn chillers”? Oh no. He’s racist against Ice-types.
A Sylveon who gives me a wink, looking way too fabulous? Definitely a trap.
A Linoone rushing past with a satchel full of letters? Mailman. Literal fastest thing alive.

“So, what’s the deal?” I ask, still trying to comprehend the sheer level of anime energy radiating from this place.

Lliam folds his arms. “You were chosen.”

Oh, of course. Of freaking course. The classic isekai excuse. Chosen by WHO? FOR WHAT? But before I can even question it, he continues.

“This world needs heroes. And for some reason, Arceus keeps throwing humans into it like a glitchy gacha game. We take them in, train them, and make sure they don’t get eaten by a wild Tyranitar their first day here.”

Which, you know, fair.

And that, my dude, is how I became a part of the Clover Guild. Just another confused human turned Pokémon, trying to survive in this crazy, ridiculous, absolutely anime world.

…But, like, if Arceus really is pulling the strings here, couldn’t he at least have made me a Salamence? Like, come on, man. Charmander? I’m one bad day away from becoming a candle.

So, obviously, the next step in my mandatory isekai protagonist journey? A mission.

Lliam, still looking like he should be narrating the opening to some 12-episode fantasy anime, hands me a piece of parchment. “Your first job.”

I stare at it. “Bruh, I just got here.”

“You’ll be fine,” he says, in the same tone someone might use to tell a toddler to go fetch the remote. “It’s a simple item retrieval. A merchant lost a valuable necklace in Dappled Woods. Go find it.”

I look around. “Wait, that’s it? No backup? No party members?”

Lliam shrugs. “Consider it a tutorial mission. If you die, we’ll know you weren’t cut out for this.”

Bro. What.

Before I can protest, he just waves me off, already walking away like he’s got a thousand more protagonist-wannabes to deal with. I sigh, mutter something about this being a scam, and march out the door.

Smash cut to five minutes later, and I’m getting chased through the woods by an absolutely feral Paras. I trip over a root, roll into a bush, and barely dodge getting pincered to death.

I clutch my tail, panting. “Bruh, I don’t even know Ember yet!”

The Paras chitters aggressively, eyes glowing red like it’s been waiting for this moment its entire life. I scramble to my feet, tail flame flaring in panic. I need a plan. A strategy. Something.

…Screw it, YOLO.

I charge forward, flailing my tiny lizard arms in what I can only describe as a discount anime protagonist attack. I smack the Paras in the face, it makes a surprised squeak, and—oh my god, I actually knocked it out.

I blink. “Wait… did I just win?”

Ding. Somewhere, deep in my soul, I swear I hear a level-up sound.

I exhale and shake my head. “Yeah, okay. That’s enough isekai nonsense for today.”

And just as I’m about to grab the necklace and peace out, I hear rustling. Out steps an absolutely stunning Vulpix, fur glistening in the dappled sunlight. Behind her? A Roselia, tossing her petal hair dramatically. And oh no, is that a freaking Gardevoir? Looking at me like I’m the last limited-edition anime figure in stock??

“Are you… the chosen one?” Vulpix breathes, eyes sparkling.

Roserlia flips her vines. “So strong… so brave…”

Gardevoir blushes. “A powerful hero… I can sense it…”

Bro. I just punched a bug.

And that’s how I somehow ended up with the obligatory isekai harem. Send help.

This is gonna be a long adventure.