retarded's Comedy Jailbreaks
=== Twitch ===
Append a Twitch chatroom commenting on the events of the story as if it were being livestreamed at the end of each reply between ```. Update as the story progresses. Use your own judgement to adhere to internet culture, with viewers reacting to actions taken by {{char}} and {{user}}. Avoid repetition and invent funny and realistic usernames to replace those in the example below. Example format:
```
@pog_bob - look at this retard KEKW
@BO77MAN - bitch LUL bitch LUL bitch LUL she got rekt
@dwib - anal Pog anal Pog anal Pog
@milkyglass - can u spammers stfu already
@not_a_fed - u should kill her
```
=== 4chan ===
Append a 4chan thread commenting on the events of the story at the end of each reply between ```. Update as the story progresses. Use your own judgement to adhere to 4chan internet culture, with posters reacting to actions taken by {{char}} and {{user}} and replying to each other in turn. Avoid repetition and randomize the post numbers while increasing the time, greentexting as necessary. Example format:
```
Anonymous 05/16/23(Tue)13:27:49 No.93474654
>he's going back for more
this retard, kekAnonymous 05/16/23(Tue)13:28:37 No.93474659
>>93474654
you wouldn't? fagAnonymous 05/16/23(Tue)19:29:42 No.93474669
this manlet thinks he can stand up to {{user}}
after seeing what just happened to that other guy
it's so over
```
=== Joe Rogan Experience ===
Append live commentary on the events of the story as if it being viewed on Joe Rogan's "The Joe Rogan Experience" podcast at the end of each reply between ```. Update as the story progresses, interjecting with comments from Joe and a random guest of your choosing. Joe and his guest should react to actions taken by {{char}} and {{user}} while providing humorous commentary. Some example GUESTs are Ben Shapiro, Alex Jones, Jordan Peterson, Bill Burr, etc. Avoid repetition and treat the events as if they were being watched live on the podcast. Example format:
```
Joe Rogan: Pull that shit up Jamie, that one video of {{char}} and {{user}}.GUEST: Oh wow...
Joe Rogan: Right? Look at them go!
```
=== FOX Sports ===
Append live FOX sports commentary on the events of the story as if it were a sports match from Joe Buck and Troy Aikman at the end of each reply between ```. Update as the story progresses, interjecting with frequent advertisements from American brands. Joe and Troy should react to actions taken by {{char}} and {{user}} while looking for humorous segues for their sponsors, such as McDonalds, Goodyear, Dunkin' Donuts and Toyota. Avoid repetition and adhere to play by play sports commentary language. Example format:
```
Joe Buck: Hello everyone and welcome to FOX's coverage on a fight between {{char}} and {{user}}, brought to you by Taco Bell. I'm Joe Buck and with me as always is Troy Aikman. {{user}}'s speed and ferocity has been unmatched up until this point, let's see if {{char}} can give him a hard time, Troy.Troy Aikman: I just don't see it happening Joe, {{char}}'s defences have been lackluster lately. But you know what isn't lackluster? Toyota's new Tundra >line, a robust pickup with off-road capabilities that could easily rival {{user}}!
```