Urgent Newsflash!
The Japanese Language Club convened in one of Shiketsu High's many club-rooms. In particular it was one of the larger rooms, commensurate with the size of the club. Rob had wondered why class 1-F was being held in a toilet instead of one of the less-used after-school facilities, but he assumed the principal must have a good reason.
Apart from himself, there were several other Americans, a gaggle of Korean girls who spent most of the time gossiping amongst themselves and fiddling with their phones, and a light scattering of other nationalities. There were also a few other mutants. Rob was particularly interested to see the tall (scratch that, enormous) girl with the green hair he'd glimpsed around town before he'd started school. Apparently she was called Kaylee, and she was from Britain originally. Rob had never been into muscle-girls before, but he had to admit that Kaylee was quite the sight to behold; rippling muscles blended seamlessly with feminine curves. The first time he'd seen her in her gym clothes it had been all he could do not to stare, and he was definitely thinking about asking around to see if she was dating anyone. Valentine's Day was coming up, after all.
The lights in the club-room were currently down, and a large T.V. was playing an edu-tainment show intended for Japanese children who were still learning to read. It was fairly popular with the club on account of its highly meme-able characters and their catchphrases. Right now a little cartoon robot was zipping around the screen duplicating household objects as it shrilly belted out a surprisingly catchy song about pluralising words correctly.
Suddenly, the screen cut to an ident for the news, and an announcer spoke. One of the older students helped to provide real-time translation for the rest of the club.
"We interrupt 'Future Grammarnauts of the 31st Century Language Exploration Mission Go Time Now!' to bring you an urgent newsflash!"
The camera cut to a very serious looking, immaculately well-groomed older man in a suit. He sat behind a modern-looking desk with various C.G.I. graphics floating around behind him and a news ticker scrolling along the bottom of the screen. He looked up making direct eye-contact with the audience.
"We have just received news from mainland China that the S-ranked villainess Jessica Wu, known as 'Surinam Toad Girl' has just been captured by the People's Police. Miss Wu is wanted in several countries, including China, the United States, Russia, Germany, France and the United Kingdom on multiple charges of terrorism, among others."
Pictures of a pretty, young asian woman, her right eye a milky white and a scar running down that side of her face, blipped into being behind the news anchor. Most of the photographs seemed to have been taken from a great distance through a telephoto lens.
"We go now, live, to the press conference in Beijing."
The camera cut again, this time it was centred on a podium, laden with microphones, behind which stood a stocky-looking man in the typical elaborately-brocaded and medal-strewn uniform of a high-ranking police official. The man spoke in Chinese, but there were Japanese subtitles, as well as audio translation provided live.
"Thanks to close co-operation between the People's Police and the People's Empowered Human Police Division, we are pleased to announce that the so-called 'S-rank' criminal Jessica Wu, also known as 'Surinam Toad Girl', has been apprehended. This notorious terrorist will be tried here in China for her numerous crimes against the People's Republic."
As the assembled press watched, the pudgy man lost focus for a moment.
"We have no… have no… … uh… no intention of turning her over to other countries who have demonstrated a manifest incompetence at enforcing law and order in relation to the matter of empowered individuals. The People's Republic has always taken a firm stance on… this… this… … … uuuhh…"
Again, he lost focus, and swayed a little as though he was about to pass out, but instead he suddenly snapped back upright and screamed. He pulled off his jacket and tore open the front of his shirt. He reached inside and pulled out a tiny object which he threw onto the ground. The camera wobbled about as it tried to see what the thing was, and eventually focused on a horrible little creature looking like a cross between a human foetus and frog. The ugly thing lay still and dead where it had landed; no-one wanted to pick it up or touch it.
The police official was ranting, and the live translator was still doing his best to interpret.
"SHE'S STILL OUT THERE YOU MORONS!!! YOU STUPID PIGS GOT THE WRONG WOMAN! IT WAS A DECOY!! SHE GOT AWAY AGAIN! I'LL HAVE YOUR HEADS FOR THIS!! YOU'VE EMBARRASSED US ALL IN FRONT OF…"
At this point a Chinese police officer sprinted up to the camera man and grabbed for the camera. His hand covered the lens, a muffled thump was heard and the camera feed was lost.
The news anchor lowered his finger from his earpiece as the feed abruptly cut back to him. He cleared his throat.
"Ahem, it seems we've temporarily lost the feed from Beijing. On behalf of the station, I would like to apologise for that to our audience.
Regardless, it would appear that Surinam Toad Girl is, contrary to previous statements by the Chinese government and police, still at large. This must be extremely embarrassing for them. How unfortunate.
Surinam Toad Girl is to be considered extremely dangerous, and should not be approached by members of the public under any circumstances. If you do see her please call the villain hotline on 075 22 7778.
Thank-you, and we now return you to your regularly scheduled programming."
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The midnight moon cast a cold light over the Dalian dockyards. The rhythmic lapping of the water on the concrete sea-wall merged with the footfalls of the group approaching one of the smaller cargo ships currently moored there.
A group of obvious thugs with poorly-concealed bulges under the armpits of their cheap, ill-fitting suits surrounded a woman as she strode up to the ship's gangplank. She wore a strapless, red satin dress which swept down to her ankles while being split almost right up to the hip on her left side. Her face was covered by an ivory mask with gold filigree in the style of a venetian carnival mask, and the right eye-hole was closed as though in a coquettish wink. As she turned to ascend the plank, her back was turned to the docks, her backless dress revealing that her back was covered in dozens of small holes, twitching and pulsating like little, toothless mouths.
Her henchmen followed her up the plank and dispersed out across the deck while the woman waited next to a stack of cargo containers. Barely a minute later there was the sound of a scuffle, and a middle-aged man in overalls was dragged in front of her. He recognised her instantly.
"Oh no! It's you! Please, please no, don't… I have a family! Please!"
One of the goons clamped his hand over the man's mouth. On the woman's back one of the holes spasmed and dilated, and a hideous little monster, part toad, part human foetus crawled up onto her bare shoulder. The woman's smile behind her mask was just as cold and soulless as the painted ivory lips of the mask itself as she lifted the tiny abomination off her shoulder and placed it on the squirming man's neck, where it gripped tight. Instantly, the man relaxed and the henchmen released him.
At her mental command, the captain turned and walked to the bridge of his ship. The henchmen likewise spread out to help make the ship ready to cast off. It would be a relatively short trip to Japan, thought Jessica to herself, but even so, her goons would all need their toadlings replaced before the ship made port. It annoyed her that she would be constrained by such a simple limiting factor as the brief lifespan of her little creations; no more than eight hours, then they just curl up and die. If only she could find a way to extend their existence she could take over entire nations with trivial ease.
Japan was at the forefront of quirk research, if a solution to her problem could be found anywhere, it would be the land of the rising sun. It was a terrible shame that she'd been forced to abandon her criminal empire in China, and nothing short of humiliating that she should be forced to flee with nothing more than the clothes on her back and a mere handful of minions by the actions of the police. Still, she mused, she'd repaid that humiliation at least a little, evading their grasp and leaving them with egg on their faces in front of the international press, and she could easily start again in Japan.
She smiled again at the thought of world leaders kneeling to her, becoming nothing more than extensions of her will, mere appendages to use as she saw fit. Of course, that was all most people were, really, but it was nice that the universe had seen fit to give her a quirk that really drove home the point.
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