How to NOT Get an Anthro BF by anonymous

go to the furbar
loudly order fuzzy navels and wink at everyone all night
go home alone
cry

try the reptile bar next door
loudly proclaim that you have a lot of body heat to share
start hugging the reptiles around you to demonstrate
alligator bouncer grabs you by your shirt and pants, carrying you like luggage
tosses you out on your ass on the hard concrete pavement
go home to tend to your scraped up arms and legs
guess you'll spend another night hugging your bodypillow

in a fit of desperation, try the human bar at the end of the street
immediate silence and staring as soon as you open the door
turn 360 degrees and walk away

try one of the bars where all the trashy anthros hang out
aggressively flirt with everyone in attempt not to go to bed alone tonight
it was your payday today, so you show off your fat wad of cash and start offering to buy drinks for anybody who'll talk to you
most take advantage, though they just nod and listen without saying much
none of them want to go home with you
except one, a raccoon
he seems interested in you, even engaging when you chat with him
he even seems to enjoy your flirting
take him to your home
things get hot and heavy as the two of you start making out in the bedroom
God, it feels good to touch someone
says he wants to tie you up to make things more interesting
eager to please, you agree
he ties you to your bed with some rope he had on hand
seductively tells you he'll be right back and goes to your bathroom
when he comes out he's fully clothed
ask him why he put his clothes on in confusion
he doesn't say anything, he briskly walks to your dresser and takes all the money you have in your wallet
then he walks out of your bedroom
you hear the front door open and then close indicating that he's left your house
spend hours trying to get yourself untied
your muscles are sore, your legs cramped from being tied
you even have rope burns on your wrists from struggling to get free
its too embarrassing of an incident to call the police so you don't report it
the thing that sticks with you the most is that he didn't even say goodbye

living with a buff canine roommate
the sight of him gets me hot and bothered
so much so that I masturbate more than usual
roommate can smell my arousal and my after coom musk due to his canine nose
pretty much tells me the next week outright that he's moving to another dorm because he can constantly smell my horny and cums
too much of my spaghetti is already spilled to stop him
cry myself to sleep at night over the loss and having to pay the full rent

be poorfag, live in the city
don't have a car, so I use the bus to get to where I need to go
I'm sitting in a seat next to this skinny yet fit looking cheetah dude
dude's in his exercise clothes, he must be going to the gym
wanna stare but don't want to be seen as a creep who ogles random guys on the bus
occupy myself by browsing my phone while pretending not to notice him
distract myself by looking up my favorite anime
cheetah guy notices what I'm looking at
get kind of embarrassed and a little self-conscious
think he's going to make fun of me for being a grown man who watches cartoons
surprisingly he smiles at me and tells me it's one of his favorite shows too
we get to talking about the show, discussing the characters, which one's our favorite, ect.
he's actually a cool, friendly dude
feel less intimidated by this attractive cheetah the more we talk
start talking about ourselves, where we're going, that type of stuff
turns out we have more in common than just the show
he likes geeky things like fantasy, anime, and RPGs
we talk so long that he almost doesn't notice his stop is coming up
quickly he tells me we should exchange numbers
my heart leaps at the chance to meet him again
I belt out my number while he adds me as a contact
he goes to tell me his number, looking at my screen to make sure I've got it right
I do so, and exit to my home screen
I forgot that my home screen pic is of a huge muscled leopard anthro with his tongue hanging out
he's bent over and spreading his asscheeks to reveal his tight asshole
it's right there, in plain sight for me and the cheetah guy
his expression melds from surprise to shock and to poorly hidden disgust as he looks at me, I canhardlyu meet his gaze as I quickly put away my phone
before I can stutter out an apology, he says awkwardly that he'll see me later in a tone that indicates he will definitely not see me later
he gets off at his stop, walking away from me rather quickly
I get off at the next stop to cry and smoke
don't feel like going anywhere anymore so I decide to walk home and drink myself to death when I get there

after several bar failures you're more desparate than ever
Amazon's gonna take too long, you're gonna get a sex doll TODAY
use the car you're borrowing from your dad after the bus incident
closest shop is pretty far, better take the freeway
traffic of course, is shit
after an hour or two, you get there
too embarassed to talk to anybody, you quickly head for the sex doll section
look at the anthro dolls, selection sucks, like really sucks
looks like the fur is made from cheap shaggy carpet
all of them are stiff, and have this weird open mouth gape and rubber teeth for added "pleasure"
the only one that looks semi-passable is the cheetah doll
fuck it, throw down some money for the thing
dreading getting back on the freeway because traffic
but you have an idea, you put the sex doll in the passenger seat so you can use the HOV lane and bypass most of the traffic
things go smoothly for a while
suddenly sirens, a cop wants you to pull over
shit shit shit this was a bad idea
anticipate the incoming embarrassment as you pull over
cop steps out of the car, and heads over to your vehicle
look at him from the rear view mirror
he looks familiar, but you can't quite place him
nervously wait for him to walk up while trying to figure out who he is
it's the cheetah guy, the one from the bus
your heart drops when you come to the sudden realization
he walks up to your window and looks to you and the sex doll in the passenger seat, then back to you
his face screwed into an unreadable expression
he begins writing you a ticket, saying nothing the whole time
You just want to die right now
he hands you the ticket, tells you to stay out of the HOV lane and put away the sex doll
stutter out that you will and you'll never do it again
before leaving he erases any doubt that he recognizes you by saying "Stick to the bus next time."
you feel like your head's going to explore right this second
drive home fighting the urge to drive head first into a concrete wall