Amo & Lint: Fast and Slow

I woke up in my small room and needed a moment to remember where I was and what was going on. Even after two weeks I was still getting used to being a Mimikyu and living in this guild. I lifted myself up and glanced over the mess that my room was slowly turning into. At first the catboy told me they didn't have enough rooms and assigned me to a room with a roommate, but the first two didn't last a day (and I didn't even need drastic measures), and after that I guess he ran out of willing candidates, because he moved me to this smaller, but private room. It now had stacks of cloth, paint, filling, cutting and sewing tools, and other random items I managed to "acquire". I considered "acquiring" the mirror from the storeroom, but people would notice it missing quickly, and hauling it from there to here seemed like a difficult task. Remembering my yesterday's meeting, I pondered if I could get Amo to do it for me. I don't think he'd be down to steal it, but maybe if I could think of a good excuse...

I set that thought aside, walking around the room and stretching a little. I picked up the disguise I discarded before going to bed and looked over it. Crudely drawn Pikachu face stared back at me. This was the one that I was already wearing when I woke up on that grassy field. I closed my eyes and imagined tossing it into a fire pit, then watching it burn. From what I heard from others, Mimikyu wear it because they're trying to imitate the appeal of a Pikachu, but that seemed stupid. Was the yellow rat really that popular? Certainly not around this place.

I opened my eyes again and examined it more critically, tugging and pulling on it to test it. The painted face was, at best, a crude imitation, but the rest of it was pretty well-made. The cloth it was made out of was pretty tough, but pleasant to touch. The stuffing in the head was pretty light, and even the wooden tail was attached firmly. I ran my claws over it, thinking. I already had some plans and ideas, but today, they started to solidify. I put the disguise down, grabbed a large cut of cloth and a pair of scissors, and started my work. Although I had little experience with crafts, cutting and sewing was going surprisingly smoothly. After a few test cuts I found my claws to be even more comfortable to work with than my old hands. My control over them still wasn't the best, but they could bend, stretch, and curve in ways a human's couldn't. I took a break to extend them and wiggle them in the air. It felt strange, when I was moving them, it was like they were made out of soft clay, but when I needed to pick something up or slash at something, they were hard as iron. I waved them a bit, finding that I can easily bend them 180 degrees, then returned to work.

An hour or so later I looked over what I managed to stitch together, and nodded in satisfaction. Not too bad for a first try. I squeezed myself into it, making sure I'm completely covered. Today, I don't feel like causing trouble. More trouble. I stepped out of my room and decided to take a long way around to the ladder to fish for reactions. This area was just starting to get noisy, with some Pokemon passing by me, and I caught a few strange looks, just as expected. Grinning to myself under the rag, I walked up to the second floor, glancing at the catboy's office. I should come up with a better nickname for him. I should also... No, not right now.

I kept walking further, up to the roof, where Amo and I agreed to meet up yesterday. I stepped out of the staircase into the open space, leaving the noises of the guild behind me. A cold evening breeze hit me, making me momentarily grateful for the cloth wrapped around me. Amo was just off by the entrance, looking at the sky. I grinned and stepped closer to him, waving. "Hey! Amo!"

"Hey." He didn't turn to look at me, so I walked closer to him. "You're late."

"Yeah, I got held up working on a project. Have you been waiting long?"

"It's okay. Since our agreed time, I guess? I don't have a watch. Or an arm for a watch."

"Well, the project was worth it, because check this out!" I pointed a claw at the head of my freshly painted brand new disguise. He turned towards me slowly, looking me up and down.

"Why are you disguised as a Rowlet?" He finally spoke up.

I grumbled at his attempt to play dumb. "It's you! And I'm thinking I can turn this into a permanent thing!"

"It's horrible."

I gestured broadly. "Aw, come on, don't be like that! I spent a lot of time on it, you know!"

"That makes it worse."

"We can be an all-Solosis team!"

He simply stared back at me, then turned away. I gave him a poke with my claw. "Well, you could at least appreciate the effort! I had to find paint that matches your colour without seeing you. Had to do some mixing. By eye!"

"I'm translucent. Your head will look weird from every angle except from the front." He looked back at me. "Even weirder, I mean."

"Oh, shush it, you." I waved him off. "No appreciation for fine arts at all. It's going to be funny when we walk around the guild. Imagine the looks we'll get."

"Yeah, I'm imagining."

I raised a finger. "You'll come around. So, how's the blob life treating you?"

"Hm." He slowly rocked back and forth in the air a bit, then continued. "Not as bad as you might think. I'd rate it seven out of ten."

"Seven out of ten, huh? I know some people like that. What would you need to fill the remaining three?"

He rocked back and forth inside his shell a bit before answering: "I think the first thing is to properly taste food. And the second is arms."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, they're those things humans and many Pokemon have attached to their shoulders..."

I reached over and bumped my clenched hand into him. His shell was soft, and touching it felt like touching a big water balloon. "Stop doing that! You can't properly taste food?"

He floated away gently in response to the bump. "Heh. Yeah. It just gets absorbed into my gel. I get a general sense of the taste. Like... this is sweet. This is salty. This is umami. But no details." He looked away from me again. "And it's all mixed together. Like if you blended it into goop and then watered it down."

"What's umami?"

"Savoury taste. Like cooked meat. Monosodium glutamate. Soy sauce."

"Why can't you just say savoury taste?"

"Because..." He turned back to me. "Because things have names? What kind of question is that?"

I didn't want to argue about this, so I shrugged.

"Maybe if the taste was really strong I could feel it better. I actually asked Mr. Winchester if he could make a dish extra spicy but he looked at me like I grew a second..." He stopped for a moment while I was figuring out who "Mr. Winchester" is, then continued. "I decided not to press the issue."

"Aww, do you need me to go there with you?" I held my claw up. "Excuse me! He asked for no pickles! For... extra pickles!"

He didn't reply, leaving silence to hang between us. I approached the edge of the space cautiously, wondering why it doesn't have a railing. Seemed like an accident waiting to happen. And not even the funny kind. I guess Pokemon were more resilient than humans overall...

"How about you?" Amo spoke up, interrupting the silence.

"Oh, well, you know, it's not all that bad, I guess. Mostly small annoyances. Like, a lot of people stare at my fake head instead of where my eyes actually are?"

"You told me that yesterday."

"I did? Hm." I scratched my head through the cloth. "Anyway, I'd rather not wear it at all."

He turned towards me again, this time examining me for a long time, before replying: "I don't... really get your problem with it. Is wearing clothes a new development for you? Did you grow up in a nudist colony?"

"What? No. Is that what you're thinking about?" I waved him off. "I just don't like when people tell me what to wear."

"I guess."

"Oh, that reminds me, I haven't even told you about a horrible thing that happened to me! So, I've decided to try a classic thing, grab a bucket, fill it with water, and put it on top of a door. Can't even fill it from a tap around here, I had to go fetch water. I get everything ready, find a nice spot to watch, and guess who's the next person to walk into it?" I lifted myself up to look at Amo, waiting for him to reply, but he had no interest in guessing. "Carrot Gills! And he was all cheerful like, oh wow, cold water, how nice! Totally ruined it. His partner was pretty mad..."

"Who?"

"His partner, come on, they always walk around together?"

"Who's Carrot Gills?"

I placed my claws at the sides of my disguise's head, trying to demonstrate. "You know that blue guy, wi-fi on the belly, red gills like this, always hangs around with Cotton Nut?"

"What? Wooper and Chespin?"

"Ugh, yeah, I guess, if you wanna to be boring. Anyway, he was pretty mad so I skedaddled before he could figure out it was me."

Amo started slowly rotating inside his bubble in silence while I looked over the forest. He stopped after a couple of rotations. "Did the bucket hit him?"

"Huh? No, I don't think so. So, ready to go? Time for our first mission?"

"Yeah. I was thinking we grab something from the outlaw board."

"Okie-dokie, artichokie!" I stood up and pointed to the sky. "Let's go beat up someone and get paid for it!"

Together, we made our way back to the ladder, with Amo trailing behind me. Before I could head down, he spoke up: "You're not going to ask why I suggested a bounty job?"

"Beating someone up sounds good to me!"

"Okay." He took a pause before continuing. "But that's not why. I just figured that'd be better suited for a night job. You know, because they'll be asleep. Or tired."

I nodded with my fake head enthusiastically. "Sure."

"Well, unless they're also nocturnal. Or... don't sleep at all. Do you think there are Pokemon that don't sleep? I mean, there's so many..."

"Hey, hey." I grabbed him with my claws, turning him towards me. "Focus, yeah? Let's go get that bounty." He wobbled forwards, then backwards, apparently nodding with his whole body. I released him and headed downstairs.

I made my way to the ground floor and approached to the bounty board. It being early evening, the room didn't have much activity other than people passing by. The guild itself was full of noises, and an occasional team passed by as they entered, returning from their adventure, but most of the activity was concentrated elsewhere at this hour. The job board was also notably bare. The outlaw board wasn't quite as stripped. That's the price we pay for avoiding the morning rush, I suppose. I took a step back, adopting a thinking pose, looking between the posters, tapping my claws against the floor. There was a choice of... some rat. A Jigglypuff, I know that one, he can put you to sleep by singing, that sounds dangerous. There was a little panda guy with a leaf in his mouth. Oh, there's a guy that looks like Carrot Gills, but fatter and without gills. Some... bug?.. with a vertical mouth and big horns. That's a Charizard... not taking that one.

I shook my head, feeling my frustration slowly build up. How am I supposed to pick from these? I don't know most of these, and I can't even read the writing on half of them! I reached towards a paper with a bipedal crocodile on it and snatched it off the board just as Amo finally made his way down, rolling up to me.

I waved the paper in the air. "Why are you so slow? Let's go after this guy."

"We shouldn't take that one."

I looked down at the paper, trying to figure out what's wrong with this job. He didn't look that threatening, did he? Was it something about the text I couldn't read? The crimes, maybe? Finally giving up, I gave him a questioning look. "It's a dark type, Lint. I won't be able to hit them. Dark is immune to psychic."

"Oh, yeah. Psychic stuff." I extended my claws, doing some pretend flexing with them. "It must suck to have a whole type you can't hit at all. Man, that sounds bad. I'm glad I don't have to deal with that."

He gave me a long stare, prompting me to flex some more before placing the paper back onto the board. I stepped back and gestured towards it, letting him float in front of it. After studying it for a bit, he grabbed one of the pinned papers using his powers. It became enveloped in a purple glow and moved away from the board, then between us. The front contained a crudely drawn image of a Jolteon, with a description I couldn't read. "Yeah, now that's a psychic thing I wish I could do." I nodded and looked at him. "Well, sure. One dead electric goonpaw, coming right up!"

Amo panned the paper down slowly, looking at me over it. "Please tell me it wasn't you who introduced that term to the guild."

I wanted to grin back, but had to remember he won't be able to see it under my disguise, making me feel annoyed about it again. Amo placed the bounty paper on top of his shell, sticking it in place somehow. "So, can we go yet?"

"What's the rush, Lint? We'll need items. And I want to eat first." That was actually a good point. I haven't eaten today yet. The bounty probably wasn't going to be a ten-minute trip.

"Yeah! Let's go get some breakfast."

"Dinner."

"Hmm. Brinner. Dinkfast?"

He wobbled left and right in place, emulating a head shake, then headed towards the mess hall, leaving me to slowly trail behind him. He grabbed a tray and threw some food on it with his powers, and I grabbed some fruits and berries for myself. Czar-Kuhar was glaring at us from the other side of the counter, and I though about yelling at him on Amo's behalf, but Amo had already waddled away. I followed him, and we made our way to a table near the wall. The room was quite crowded now; there was enough space for us, but we weren't going to get a private table this time. We sat down across each other; I got into a seat, and Amo got onto the table with his food like the last time. He rolled into his plate, and the food went inside him through his shell. It was actually kind of fascinating to look at.

"That's disgusting." I turned to look at the source of the noise, a Pokemon sitting next to Amo. I didn't know this guy, and didn't recognise the Pokemon that he was. He was giving Amo a look of contempt.

"Is that what they told your mom in the hospital?" I leaned forward a bit, putting my claws on the table.

He rolled his eyes theatrically. "Wow, I've never heard that one before. You got any more?"

"Only for people that shower more than once a month." I raised my voice a little.

"Shut up!" He slammed his hand against the table. "I wasn't talking to you!"

"Obviously." I turned fully in his direction, talking even louder. "You'd never talk to a girl."

He frowned and stared at me, then turned away from us, shifting away from Amo a bit. Satisfied, I returned to my plate, digging through the fruits and berries I picked, pushing them into piles of similar items. The Pokemon kept shooting glances at us. Amo didn't react to this exchange at all, quietly absorbing the food from his plate. I grabbed one of the bigger berries and turned to him.

"So, why do you want arms?"

He glanced up at me. "Huh?"

"You said you wanted arms earlier. Why arms? Why not legs?" I squeezed a berry in my claws carefully until it popped, releasing a stream of juice, then pulled it under my cloak, shoving it into my mouth.

"Why would I want legs? I can float. Inferior locomotion organs."

"Why would you want arms? You can move things without them."

"Arms have other uses."

"Like what?"

"Like... self-expression." He looked somewhere off to the side. I didn't really get it, so I shrugged and dropped the subject.

When I was halfway through my plate, he was already done. He turned around inside his shell, then stayed where he was, pushing the plate off. I guess eating doesn't take that long when you don't need to chew, and don't need to stop when you talk. I noticed the Pokemon I was arguing earlier had already left. Maybe I was just a slow eater? I looked at Amo again.

"Hey, why didn't you say anything earlier? To that guy making faces at you?"

"Because if I start arguing with every imbecile in the guild, I won't have time to eat."

"Ha! Well, it's a good thing you have me to do that for you now."

"Yeah. Amazing."

After the dinkfast, it didn't take much time after that for us to get ready for the job. We made a quick visit to the storeroom where Amo went to talk to Stuttering Dalmatian while I tactically avoided him. He returned with a packed bag, which he handed to me. I struggled with putting it on for a moment, realising I'll have to place it over my disguise's shoulder, which would be over my head. That wasn't how I was used to wearing bags. "So, are you one of those guys that melt if they hold a purse for more than five seconds?"

"It's a satchel, not a purse." He took a pause that I was getting used to before adding: "I'm not. But it would be exhausting for me to hold it all the time, and I can't hang it over my body. It'll slip off."

"Fine, fine. So, are we ready now?"

"Yeah! But first, I need you to sort this pile of seeds and grains..."

"Only if I get a carriage and a prince at the end. Already got a new dress!" I made a pose, pointing up with a claw. "Onwards! To adventure!"

With that, we headed outside. The sun has fully set at this point, and we were greeted with a chill evening breeze. I took a moment to stretch, enjoying the anticipation. The guildhall was located on the outskirts of Capim Town. I went there a few times, but I was mostly sticking around the guildhall. We weren't headed there today, though. Amo took the lead, leading me from a cobblestone path to a dirt road of a sort to slightly trampled grass. And despite the fact that he could float above it, he was forcing me to walk painfully slowly. After a few minutes of this following NPC mission bullshit I got fed up with it and simply grabbed him and placed him on top of my fake head.

"How about you point the way and I get us there with my inferior locomotion organs?"

He grumbled in response. "I don't think this is necessary..."

"It is if we want to get there before next week!"

"You don't even know how far it is." Nonetheless, he allowed me to carry him, and I picked up the pace.

The journey itself wasn't very notable. The noises of Capim, already barely audible from the guild, faded away completely, replaced with only the sounds of the trees and grass on the wind, and the occasional distant voice of a Pokemon. It was a lot like a regular evening walk through the countryside, except it felt a bit more safe than typical. I've already noticed that my night vision was a lot better than when I was a human, even on a moonless night I could see almost as well as I used to during the day. Daytime, on the other hand, brought its own challenges, it was harsh both on my body and on my senses. Maybe instead of these stupid cloaks other Mimikyu should get some umbrellas. Without the oppressive sun in the sky, I could extend my arms out a bit. For the first time in a long time I felt like I'm free, free to go anywhere I want, free to do whatever I want. The job we took only a few minutes ago already seemed irrelevant and distant. I was almost tempted to drop Amo on the ground and run into the forest, and I shook my head to chase these thoughts away. Maybe one day... but not yet. Not now.

With Amo gently tugging on my disguise's head to direct me to turn, we passed through the forest in silence. Finally, we arrived to the entrance of the cave. It looked like a pile of rocks with a dark entrance I couldn't see through. On one hand, it looked unremarkable, on the other hand, there was just something off about it. I approached closer, trying to peer into it. "My, my... this is quite a... mysterious dungeon right there."

Amo rolled off of me. He looked at the cave as well, then turned towards me, and replied: "Eh, it's not really giving me a mysterious dungeon vibe. More like a questionable cave."

"Suspicious cavern."

"Doubtful crevice."

"Strange pinhole."

He shook left-right inside his gel, allowing me to claim victory, then headed towards the entrance. I raised my claw. "Hey, hold on! You're just going to walk in like that? Your first dungeon deserves more respect!"

"It's not my first dungeon." He stopped. "You haven't been in a dungeon before?"

"Nope! But I practised fighting in the training room. I can slash with my claws!"

"Right. And what else?"

"Why would I need anything else?" I scoffed. "I don't fear a mon that practised a thousand moves once, but a mon that practised one move a thousand times!"

"You practised it a thousand times?"

"Just nine hundred ninety more and I'll get there!"

"You need move diversity."

"Oh, really?" I flicked my fake head in his direction. "How's your move diversity? Got something for dark types?"

He grumbled. "Touché... well, it's not very complicated. We go in and fight anything that attacks us. If they're ferals, they'll disappear when they're defeated. So, just hit them until that happens. Grab any items we can find. The bag has berries and elixirs. The corridors of the dungeon are kinda... weird. So try to not split up."

"What if I hit them until they stop moving, and they don't disappear?"

"Then we bring a shovel and never speak of it again."

I laughed. "And the goonpaw?"

"When we find the..." - he held a pause, before really pressing on the next word - "Jolteon, we knock them out and bring them back. Shouldn't be too hard."

"Okay, boss." I reached out with a claw. "Let's go."

He glanced at my claw, then moved closer to me, allowing me to grab him. I thought that his expression changed there for a moment, but maybe I was just imagining - it was really difficult to tell what's going on his face. We headed towards the entrance, crossing the entry together. The instant we entered the cave proper, I felt a shift in the air. It was like a faint change in air pressure. The kind that would make my hair stand up, if I had any. I shivered a bit under my cloak, then glanced at Amo, who was still touching my claw. "Hey, uh, Amo, are you alright?"

"Huh?" He turned to look at me. The way he could do that without turning his shell always seemed a little strange, but it felt even more strange when my hand was on it as it remained in place, and I could feel it pulse slightly as he moved inside of it, disturbing his gel. "Yeah? Why?"

"Uh, nothing." I let go of him and looked around. Even though we just went through the entrance, we were now standing in the middle of a small room with rock-hewn walls. Faint glow was coming from seemingly nowhere, making it a little brighter than the outside. The room had multiple exits. A larger one was right in front of us, with a smaller one just to the left, and another, even smaller, behind us and to the right. I looked back to Amo, who was slowly scanning the room. "Well, if you've been in one before, you should lead the way!"

He flipped over backwards to look at me, ending up with his yellow... spiral... thingy?.. on the bottom, then righted himself by rotating the other way. "Yeah, sure." He turned back to the biggest exit. "Let's just start there and try the right hand... rule." I didn't know what that is, but I nodded, following him.

We went into the passage, me trailing just behind him. This was nothing like the caves I've been to before. You wouldn't see a nice tunnel like this unless someone carved it. The walls were rough, but the rooms and the passages were just a little too convenient to feel natural. The temperature felt too even, no drafts coming from anywhere. I looked up, letting my disguise's head droop behind me, looking up at the ceiling. This would be such a cool place to visit with friends. Have some fun, run around... I sighed, trying to focus on today's responsibilities.

"Lint?" I jolted to attention, realising I fell behind Amo. I picked up the pace, catching up to him. He was hovering where the tunnel ended, leading into another room, smaller than the one we've arrived in. He tilted his body slightly in the direction of the room. "Want to try to take that guy on?"

Inside, I saw a Mankey. It was roaming the room aimlessly, stopping to glance around every couple of steps. Its movement was erratic and twitchy. I nodded, stepping forward in front of Amo. "Alright."

"I'll be there if you need help." I scoffed and moved ahead, walking into the room.

As soon as I did, Mankey raised its head, turning towards me. Without any hesitation, it charged in my direction, dropping on all fours. I stood my ground, raising my claws. As it got closer, I side-stepped and swiped at it, feeling my claws connect. Mankey rushed past me, then turned around, running at me again, raising a fist and trying to punch me. I tried to jump back, but he still nicked me. It seemed to barely graze me, so I replied with another slash, trying to duck away. He advanced towards me more aggressively, and I started to panic a bit, flailing wildly in his direction with my claws while backing off. The tactic seemed to work fine, because even though he kept taking swings at me, he apparently couldn't land a scrach or a punch. Before long, a swipe from me sent him reeling, and he disappeared in a puff of air.

I jumped forward and raised my claws triumphantly, making a wave with them. "Heck yeah! Lint one, dungeon zero!" I wiggled my whole body along with my claws in a little improvised dance as Amo approached.

"Yeah. Good job. Let's go."

I lowered my claws and tried to pout at him, again realizing that's not going to work. "That's it? Good job?"

"What? What do you want me to say? Bad job?" He stared at me. "Sorry, my bad." His voice became louder and more intense, a sudden change from his usual monotone. "Amazing! Great battle! Best I've seen! You beat a Pokemon who can't hit you! We should celebrate after every encounter! This job will take five eternities and two days!"

I crossed my claws like arms in response, tilting my fake head backwards. "Pshaw. Yeah, you know what? He couldn't hit me. Because I'm that amazing."

This room only had two exits and we came through one of them, so we headed towards the other one together in silence, entering another corridor, much like the previous one. This one was more curved but still felt unnatural. It was also so similar that I started to wonder about how we're supposed to navigate these. Maybe we should grab some bread from the canteen and toss it behind us as a trail, it worked for those two, right? What were they called?

"Sorry. I shouldn't have snapped." I stopped and looked back at Amo failing behind me again. "It was your first fight. It's just that fights like that are very unremarkable to me. You did fine."

"Geez, I'm not made of sugar." I raised my claws. "But thanks. And! I still have a chance to impress you for real! Watch me!" I picked up the pace, walking further down the corridor, and running almost face to face with an owl. It glared at me, then charged towards me with the same mindless aim as the Mankey. I was ready this time, and charged at it myself, trying to slash at it with my claws. I didn't feel a solid connection, but I managed to avoid the attack from it as well.

"Liiiiint!" Amo yelled from behind, catching up, while I charged at the owl again. It screeched at me while I tried to claw at it again, trying, but failing to land a solid hit. As I prepared to strike again, it closed its wings, wrapping them around itself, and its body started to glow. But before I could go for another attack, the owl was suddenly hit from behind and went flying at the corridor wall behind me, disappearing with a puff.

I crossed my claws again, giving Amo an angry glare. "Hey! I had this one in the bag! You didn't need to intervene."

"Hmm." He moved closer, catching up, then landed on the floor. "Okay, I've been holding my..." He took a familiar pause. "I didn't ask about it before. But. Do you actually know Pokemon types? What's effective and what isn't?"

"Hm? Oh, yeah, you mean like, electricity doesn't work on rock types? Unless you get them wet?" Somehow, I could feel his glare becoming more intense. "Oh, psychics are weak against ghosts? Everyone knows that."

"You haven't played the games, didn't you?"

"Nope!" I placed my claws on my hips. "But I watched the cartoon as a kid."

"Anime."

"Okay now." I raised a claw. "Now you're not just a pedant, you're also wrong. An anime is a cartoon. So you can't correct me."

He started slowly rotating inside his gel, making me stand there and wait until he finally responded: "Would you point at a square and call it a rectangle? A square is a rectangle."

"Aw, but I can point at a pear and say it's a fruit, can I? That doesn't mean I think a pear and a fruit is the same thing, or that pears are worse than other fruits, or that people who eat pears and weirdos because eating fruits is for kids, right?"

"...I feel like we're getting off-topic. You're a ghost-type. Your attack is a ghost-type. It doesn't work on normal types like that Noctowl."

Well, fuck.

"But normal attacks also don't work on you." He continued. "Fighting too."

"What about ghost against fighting?"

"That works fine."

"That makes no sense at all."

He took off in the air again. "Pretend I'm shrugging. And just leave the type thinking to me."

I sighed and turned forward. "Fiiine. Let's go, then."

We headed onwards together, passing through more rooms and running into more wild Pokemon. They were all similarly mindlessly aggressive and went down to a blast from Amo or a few swipes of my claws, and they started to blend together very quickly. The similarity of the rooms and corridors didn't help much, though they seemed to change subtly as we got in deeper. An Axew (Amo told me the name) managed to sneak up on us and managed to bite me through my cloak, though its claw follow-up did nothing, and a strike from me followed by a blast from Amo was enough to get him off of me. That was the only time I got hit. We also ran into a Sableye, and Amo immediately backed off, leaving me to fight it one on one.

After about an hour I peeked around the corner into yet another room, and there I saw the goonpaw in the corner. He stood out immediately from the wild Pokemon. He wasn't shambling like a zombie, for one, and he was lying on a blanket, next to some bags. He seemed to be sleeping, and his ears were twitching slightly. I looked back to call Amo over, but he wasn't there. He must have fallen behind. Did I go too fast? No, he's too slow. I stared at the goonpaw, weighting my options. Waiting for Amo would be a safe choice, but what if goonpaw wakes up until then? What if Amo yells something at me and wakes him up? I frowned, trying to figure out how long we've been separated... come to think of it, I don't think he was there in the last room... or the one before that... he definitely blasted that Croagunk, so that was three rooms ago? Maybe four. I looked at the goonpaw again. How dangerous can he be, anyway? I nodded to myself and started sneaking towards him across the room, holding my breath.

Halfway through the room, his ears suddenly perked up and he got up in an instant. I froze where I was while his eyes appraised me. Maybe he'd think I'm a wild Pokemon... no, not with that stupid bag. He bared his teeth, taking a guarded step forward. "Guh-huh-huh. What is this? An exploration team is after me already?" His eyes were fixated on me as he started to slowly circle me, maintaining distance.

I brought my claws out in response and pointed at him. "That's right! Your days of... whatever you do, are over! We're going to beat you up!"

His eyes narrowed and his ears perked up. He leaned a bit lower to the ground, continuing to walk counter-clockwise around me. "We? Who's we? I don't see anyone else." He lifted his head. "Someone in your bag? A little bug, maybe? A Ribombee perhaps?" He squinted a bit. What the hell was he talking about? Sounds like one of those new Pokemon I haven't learned about yet. But I'm sure I heard that name before... Must have been someone in the guild. Did he have an encounter with that Ribombee? Or maybe just heard about them?

"No! He's about to catch up, and he's going to-" He charged at me immediately, and I barely managed to scramble away from him, quickly turning around.

He let out a low growl, looping to face me again. "Then I should get you quickly!" Shit, I should have stalled for longer. He charged at me again. I was ready this time, and met him with my own claws. He avoided me at the last moment and passed me by instead of trading hits, doing another loop.

I raised my claws higher, trying to look intimidating. "Hey, I thought you said quickly! Too scared of me, huh?"

His laugh sounded like a dog with tuberculosis. "I'm not an idiot. Looks like you can't hit me at range, huh?" He leaned to the ground, and this time instead of charging at me, he started to prepare some kind of an electric attack. His spiked fur stood up, and sparks of electricity started to fly from him. I cursed at myself for not waiting for Amo, and dashed towards the goonpaw myself, trying to interrupt whatever he was doing. I went for a wide slash, and he stopped, backing off. I tried to back him into a corner, but he jumped away, then ran around me.

Once he was far away, he launched into another coughing laughter. "Oh, you're fast. But I'm faster. I'm the fastest Pokemon you'll ever meet!" I tried to chase him down, but he avoided me again, moving all the way to a wall before turning around and firing some electrical charges at me. I dodged the first, the second, th-

"Au!" Motherfucker, that hurt! I gritted my teeth, trying to stay uptight. The goonpaw grinned at me, seeing his attack connect, and started to charge at me again. I tried to raise my claws, but they were still numb from that jolt. Halfway across the room, he leaped at me, opening his mouth wide, with jolts of electricity surrounding his maw. He was getting closer... and closer... I couldn't put up any resistance as he sunk his fangs into my neck, tearing right through...

...the cloth?

Oh. Right. I almost started to think of that as my head. He went through me, leaving a big hole in the part that connected the Solosis part to the rest of it. A feeling of rage came over me. I worked hard on this costume! And he ruined it! I'll beat him senseless! Twice over! With my newfound anger, I swiped my claws at him as hard as I could, and hit, extracting a satisfying yelp from the stupid mutt. I clenched my claw, grabbing his fur to try to hold onto him. He tried to back off, pulling me along, making more pained noises. "Let go, you freak!"

"I'll kill you!" I yelled back, trying to hit his face with my free claw. He tried to throw me, dragging me over the floor while I punched and clawed at him. Finally realising the futility of trying to get out of my grip, he instead started trying to zap me while shaking vigorously. I delivered a few more hits, but eventually my fingers slipped off of his fur and he threw me against a wall. Groaning, I stood up slowly while he ran across the room. From there, he resorted to launching long-distance electric shots at me. I started covering, trying to think of a way out of this, when I heard a familiar noise of a psychic blast come from the side.

The goonpaw was taken by surprise and let out a yelp as he was pushed back. He lowered his head again, the fur on his back rising, as Amo leisurely floated in. "Oh, hi. You guys started without me?"

The outlaw looked at him, then me, then him again, and started cough-laughing. "And here I was, trying to figure out what the fuck is wrong with her head. Who are you? A clown duo?"

Amo leaned slightly in my direction. "Lint, could you respond for me? I'm going to think of a funny answer for fifteen minutes and it won't be funny by then."

I groaned, struggling to stand. "Y-yeah. We're going to p-put "fun" in your funeral."

Amo stared at me for another moment before turning to the goonpaw sharply and floating towards him, charging another attack. This time, he was prepared for it and avoided it easily, launching into another array of barking laughter. "Too slow! Too slow! You'll never get me! I'm the fastest Pokemon you'll ever meet!" He dropped down and started running at Amo in the same charge that got me, surrounding himself with sparks of electricity and opening his mouth for a bite.

My partner seemed nonplussed. "Oh, no. You're fast and I'm slow. Whatever shall I do." A different kind of purple glow surrounded him that I haven't seen yet. The Jolteon leaped at him, and I yelled, trying to get up.

Just as he reached the apex of the jump, the purple glow surrounding Amo popped, turning into a dark pulse that spread across the entire room. It felt like the world around me turned inside out. I struggled up, feeling even more unsteady than before, and tried to move forward, only to find my own feet tangled and falling over again. Now even my arms didn't seem to obey me properly.

The Jolteon, meanwhile, was almost frozen mid-air, still leaping towards Amo, but in slow motion, like a bullet in the Matrix. Amo suddenly dashed around him, moving in a wide arc at incredible speed I never thought he'd be capable of. From the side, he began a barrage of psychic attacks, throwing the Jolteon off his course and at a wall, still in slow motion. He made two... three... four blasts, each eliciting a more and more desperate yelp from the Jolteon. And just as I managed to unsteadily get up and stand straight, the purple glow popped again, restoring things to seeming normality, making the Jolteon immediately crash into a wall with a sound that made me wince a bit. Amo howevered where he was, watching the enemy for a moment, then flew towards me, looking me up and down. "You alright?"

I gave him thumbs-up. "Like a peach! Overripe and smashed into a window."

"You've got berries in your bag. Cheri for paralysis. Oran for healing." He was giving me the kind of a look that a parent has when they say "I'm not mad, I'm disappointed."

"Guh." He told me something about that when we were in the storeroom, but I wasn't paying attention. I dropped the bag to the floor, digging through it, and retrieved the berries he mentioned, chomping down on it. Amo was examining my costume, and grabbed the head, which was almost completely turn off, lifting it just above me. "Alas, poor Yorick... I knew him, Horatio..."

I laughed softly as the berries started to work, making me feel better almost immediately. I grabbed the head with my own claws and placed it back in place. It was too damaged to stay on properly, and promptly slid off into a mess. "Oh well. I guess that's going to need to be repaired."

"Or. Here's a cool idea. Set it on fire."

"Naaaaah."

"Lint. I think the joke has ran its course. And you're not going to get a better punchline than this."

I ran my claws over the busted head, considering this. "You know, if this was the yellow rat disguise, maybe I'd have an excuse to ditch it..."

He turned away, to the goonpaw. "Yeah, with luck, you'll get into another scrap like this." I followed him. Our enemy was still on the floor where he slid off the wall, clearly in no condition to fight, his ears angrily twitching. He growled at us as he approached.

"By the way, Amo, what the hell was that? The..." I gestured broadly. "...thing? When you got fast?"

"Trick Room." He looked at me as if that was supposed to be a sufficient explanation. "It makes fast things slow, and slow things fast."

"Could you do that on the way back? So we're a little faster than a snail and I don't need to carry you."

"There's a difference between doing a cartwheel once and cartwheeling from here to the guild." He tilted in the goonpaw's direction a bit. "I was really looking for an opportunity to try it. And when I saw his wanted posted I knew it's going to be perfect."

"What, does his poster say he's the fastest Pokemon we'll ever meet?"

"Nnnnnnnnnno..." The pause lasted longer than normal, and I started to slowly lean into Amo's face. "It's his name. Which. Is. Uh." The next pause was long enough that the Jolteon raised his head, snarling and replying instead of Amo: "My name is Quickpaw! You'd do well to remember-"

I was already keeling over with laughter, slamming my claw against the stone floor of the cave. Quickpaw looked deeply insulted, while Amo slowly spun in place. "Well, that's why I. Withheld. That information."

"What's so funny about it?!" He snarled again, louder.

"You wouldn't get it." Amo intoned.

"Warrior cat! No... Energizer Bunny! No, wait..." I lifted myself up, still giggling. "Quickpea! Give me like twenty minutes and I'll..."

"Lint, c'mon. It's been a long day. Night. Whatever. Let's go back. There's rope in the bag. Tie this... dancing tiger up."

I sighed and retrieved the rope, wrapping it around the Jolteon, and got gently pushed back by Amo's powers. "You'll choke him like that. I'll handle it."

"What, are you a knot nerd?" I raised my claws, dropping the rope and leaving it to him, taking a moment to check out his sleeping spot. Two of the bags had unremarkable supplies, while the third one was filled with shiny orbs. I raised it up. "Hey, what are these?"

"Stolen stuff. We're supposed to bring it back."

"Haaa. Well, there's maybe fifteen of them in here. Do we need to bring all twelve back? I'm sure they're missing their ten orbs..."

"Yes, let's ruin our guild's reputation even further for a couple of orbs we could get for free if we ask Toge nicely."

"Damn, so, completely impossible to obtain." I lifted the bags up. They weren't too heavy. "I guess I'm carrying these too?"

"Mmmmmm." We both looked at Quickpaw simultaneously. The rope was now wrapped around his neck and chest. "I think making him do it might count as some kind of war crime."

"It's okay, Capim has no extradition treaty with Switzerland." I grabbed the bags and hung them over Quickpaw's back.

He growled, though without putting up any resistance. "This isn't fair! You cheated! You didn't beat me fairly! It was a trick! That doesn't count! I'm the fastest Pokemon you'll ever meet!"

Amo turned to stare at him intensely. "Lint. I have an enormous favour to ask you."

"Mmm?" I looked up at him.

"Remember what I said about arms? Well, one thing I really miss is being able to use gestures to express myself."

I nodded slowly, starting to understand what he's getting at.

"There's one I'm thinking in particular right now. And you've got your claws. Would you care to oblige for both of us?"

"Of course! Anything for my partner." I pulled Amo close and wrapped my arm around him, placing us in front of Quickpaw. Slowly, I raised both of my hands, holding the claw fingers up, and then, even slower, lowered the side claws on both hands, leaving only the middle claws standing.

We stood like that for a minute, letting the moment sink in, before Amo nodded inside his shell. "Now let's go."