Slowking's Premonition

"Well, Gabe, looks like we got another investigation on our hands."

The Slowking takes a puff from his cigarette, while using his other hand to read a piece of parchment.

"I can't believe the Federation still can't get me a Connection Orb. Looks like we're heading off to Capim Town this time, Gabe. At least it'll get us out of our camped office for a while."

The Slowking continues down a worn trail, continuing to talk to himself.

"The perp from the last case really was something." The Slowking caresses a pair of claw-mark scars below his left eye. "Who'd thunk that Liepard would know Hone Claws? Crazy, just crazy. Well, at least now I have a scar to show off. 'See this? This is when I arrested that Catwoman wannabe.' Women... they're crazy, don't you agree, Gabe?"

A voice echoes through the Slowking's mind. Of course, Yado. Many a woman would make a man turn to smoking or booze. Well, you're already halfway there.

Yado the Slowking smirks, while reaching into his bag to pull out a box of cigarettes. "Of all the things to come along with us from the human world, I'm glad it was this." Yado flicks open the box, only to sigh at the realization that it's empty. "... Well, guess we'll have to make some pitstops before starting our investigation."

Surely some place in this Capim Town must sell cigarettes.

"Hopefully, Gabe. Hopefully. You know what a good smoke always reminds me of, Gabe?"

Music: Deadly Premonition: Life is Beautiful

"Metal Gear Solid, directed by Hideo Kojima, 1998, for the Playstation. It's an iconic game that almost everyone knows just through cultural osmosis, but that shouldn't stop people from experiencing the game to its fullest by actually playing it. Especially because of Hideo Kojima's unique game directorial style, even though he espouses his loves of movies constantly, he clearly loves putting the player through unique gameplay sequences that sometimes even break the fourth wall. 'Check the back of the CD case, Snake!', 'Use controller port 2!' Such clever use of the platform the game is on. Oh, but I'm getting off-track. You see Gabe, much like me, Solid Snake (Played by David Hayter in the English dub, and Akio Otsuki in the original Japanese audio) loves his cigs. One of the first codec calls in the game is Snake revealing he smuggled his cigs by keeping them in his stomach. Now, as much as I love a good smoke, I don't think I'm dedicated enough to do something like that. But that shows just type of character Solid Snake is."

It's a good thing whatever mission we were summoned here for spawned us with a box of our favorite smokes. Your talk about Metal Gear Solid reminded me of a story I've read online, "Metal Gear Linoone: Lord of the Pelippers", Linoone-anon, 2023. Now, you might roll your eyes at how on the nose the title of the parody is, but in reality it's an excellent, thrilling story that absoluely captures the same spirit of Metal Gear Solid. While the protagonist, Solid "Kaz" Linoone, is much less serious than Snake, he still manages to guide the reader through a high-stakes tale of corporate espionage. The story also features Debby the Delibird, who shares our love of smoking, but what her heart is truly after is Solid Linoone himself. The two truly make for an entertaining pair, and you can always feel the passion they have for each other.

Yado listens intently as he takes one last drag from his cigarette, which has now almost completely burned up. "You always bring up the most interesting stories, Gabe."

Music: Deadly Premonition: FBI Special Agent

"So, you're the investigator from the Federation? BZZZZT." Says Officer Magnezone.

The Slowking pulls out his badge. "Federation Detective Frank Yado Morcant. Just call me Yado, that's what everybody calls me." Yado sizes up Magnezone, and the two Magnemites floating beside him. "Looks like this guy is the ruler of the roost. Well, he would be if he were a flying type. I guess you could say he's more like a Robocop, right Gabe?"

Lets just hope he's programmed well.

"... Who are you talking to? BZZZZT." Officer Magnezone asks, befuddled.

"Oh, I'm talking to my partner, Gabe. Please don't ask anything more than that please, it's... personal." Yado replies.

"... Okay. BZZZZT." Magnezone stares suspiciously at the Shellder "crown" atop Yado the Slowking's head. Yado seems to not notice the Magnezone's glare.

"Now, down to business... The Federation wants me to secretly infiltrate and keep some tabs on an organization called the 'Clover Guild'... Oh, but before I ask about that, do you happen to know of any places that sell cigarettes?"

I was about to remind you, good thing you have your priorities in order, Yado.

Magnezone makes a mechanical noise that can only be described as a robotic sigh. "The Kecleon Shop might have some in stock, but not many Pokemon smoke around these parts. BZZZZZT."

"Thank you. You know officer... You remind me of someone..."

"Oh? Who? BZZZZZZZT."

Music: Deadly Premonition: Life is Beautiful

"X. You know, from Megaman X, 1993, produced by Tokuro Fujiwara. It might seem like a bit of a weird comparison, but you being both some sort of robot while also being a peacekeeper just made me think of him. It's an iconic action game and one of the most memorable of the SNES library, fast-paced action games like it were more common on the SNES's rival, the Genesis (Or sometimes called the Master System.), which helped it stand out. X's character goes through a lot of development throughout the games, mainly struggling with the idea of trying to maintain peace while stuck in an endless war against Mavericks. Do you ever have doubts about how you keep the peace, officer?"

"... I have no idea what you're talking about. But I know you'll have no problems fitting in with that guild. BZZZZT." Magnezone responds curtly before turning around and leaving quickly with his Magnemite partners.

You know Yado, talking about fighting to keep peace, you just reminded me of another story. "Path to Aura", by KFC-anon. It's a brutal story detailing the ferociousness of a group called the Blaziken Tribe, and how one of its members, KFC, yes I know, rather humorous name isn't it? But back on track, the story is about how KFC is able to escape the brutality of the clan that literally leaves him for death through his resourcefulness and quick-thinking. Traits we rely on a lot, don't we Yado? Anyway, KFC vows to survive, and to defeat the leader of the Blaziken Tribe. Anyone who's dealt with hardship like we have can easily relate, it can be easy to fall into despair from how unfair the world feels... but that doesn't mean we shouldn't try our hardest to fight back. Good thing a group as dangerous as the Blaziken Tribe is completely fictional, right Yado? Though, you could say that the story could've been trying to make some political commentary by implying that the tribe is similar to some real life groups, like-

"Hold that thought, Gabe. I just realized we have no idea how this Capim Town is laid out. If we want to find that Kecleon Shop, we're going to have to mingle with the locals. Why don't we try talking to that Chespin over there?" Yado strolls over to a Chespin and Wooper duo who are chatting with each other.

Music: Deadly Premonition: Comic Relief

"Heya! Are you lost?" The Wooper asks inquisitively.

"I am. I'm Federation Detective Frank Yado Morcant. Just call me Yado, that's what everybody calls me."

"Are you looking for the Clover guild?" The Chespin asks, cocking his head to the side.

"Well, I would like to visit there, but for now I need to get to the Kecleon Store. Can you two give me directions?"

The Chespin opens his mouth to respond, but the Wooper interrupts him. "Yeah! You just gotta take the ligma path!"

Careful Yado, this Wooper has set up a devious trap. Respond carefully.

"Really? I swear I already took that path..." Yado responds with a slight smirk.

Wooper looks a little disappointed his plot failed. The Chespin suddenly speaks up before the Wooper can think of another. "What he meant to say is, you can find the Kecleon shop down that path and to the right."

"Thank you." Yado says as he heads in the direction the Chespin pointed to.

Music: Deadly Premonition: Life is Beautiful

Gabe's words echo in Yado's mind as he walks through the town. That duo... they're similar to a team from "The Outlaw", 2023, by Chespin-anon. It's a story of how two best of friends face down an outlaw that swaps their bodies, and the two must learn to adapt and overcome this new challenge in order to defeat the outlaw and get back to their original bodies. It's very memorable, who can forget the moment where Chespin (now in the body of Wooper) has to get the courage to admit he needs to kept warm in order to sleep? Chespin got to experience life from the point of view of his best friend, and it only made his bond with him deepen even more. The story does an amazing job of showing just how stepping into another person's shoes can change your perspective, and get you to appreciate that person much more. I wonder what it'd be like if we swapped places?

"It's an interesting thought experiment." Yado says. "That must be the shop over there."

Music: Deadly Premonition: FBI Special Agent

Yado finally comes across the Kecleon Shop, to see the Kecleon serving an Ariados. "Sorry Ariados, but we don't have any of that fabric in stock. We'd have to import from another town."

"Did you hear that, Gabe? Looks like that Pokemon could use our help." Yado walks up to the Ariados. "Hello, I'm Federation Detective Frank Yado Morcant. You can just call me Yado, that's what everybody calls me. What seems to be the problem here?"

"Oh, the shop doesn't have the fabric I need for my tailoring business. I'd leave town to visit another store, but I can't leave my shop unattended for that long." Responds the Ariados sadly.

"How far away is the closest town? I could help pick it up for you." Yado says.

The tailor's face lights up. "You'd really do that?"

You can't ever resist giving other's help, no matter how trivial their problem, can you Yado?

Yado nods. "Of course, anything to hels sdjfksdl eskljfds sdfe urdfjlsd wejrljkfdkls werewhfds werjklfddss werjsd. Jerjslers, fgdsd jkwlersd weroiuvcx werw... wekljrw wkbru lkjklsd povcx pounma jskdlf."

"Thank you so much! The closest town is Treasure Town, so it shouldn't be too far." Responds the Ariados.

"I'll be right off then. Don't worry Gabe, I already took a look through the Kecleon's wares while we were talking, seems like they don't sell cigarettes here. We might have more luck in Treasure Town." Yado says as he walks away from the shop.

Music: Deadly Premonition: Life is Beautiful

"Treasure Town... just like the name of the town in Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Time, Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Darkness, and Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Sky. 2007 and 2009 respectively, and all of them directed by Seiichiro Nagahata and Hironori Ishigami. What a crazy coincidence. We only had Explorers of Time, don't you remember Gabe? I wanted Darkness since it sounded cooler, but it was all sold out. Shame I never got to experience any of the extra content in Sky, like the special episodes. But the story I did get to experience was great, all of the emotional moments hit like trucks, much like the one that hit us and summoned us to this world, right Gabe?"

You took the words right out of my mouth. Treasure Town also reminds me of another story, "Doldrums", 2024, by Vaporeon-anon. The main character, D'alin, gets turned into an Eevee and meets up with a few native ones, each with their own disability. One can't speak, one can't hear, and one is a Deerling (Who is also blind). With a gimmick like that, you'd think three monkey Pokemon would've been more appropriate, but the author expertly weaves intrigue and interpersonal drama between all of the team's members, digging deep into their internal struggles. Specifically, D'alin has to figure out his place in this new world, and later on in the story, has to figure out what he wants to evolve into. Don't worry, I won't spoil it, but all I'll say is that it's a story everyone should dive into.

"A team of disabled Pokemon, huh? Sounds like they had to use their strengths to cover the other's weaknesses. That's something we both do pretty often, don't we Gabe?" Yado muses as a Torchic and Squirtle duo passes by.

Music: Deadly Premonition: Life is Beautiful

Those two remind me of "Buckle Up", 2023, by Ribombee-anon. It's a story about the powerful themes of betrayal and mistrust. We've had to deal with some betrayals in our lives before, right Yado? The two protagonists, Cooper the Torchic and Testa the Squirtle end up getting tricked by an evil Dewott into giving up one of their fellow guildmembers. But the rest of the guild ends up helping them, and they save their friend. It shows how even if you make a mistake and break someone's trust, there's always a chance to fix it and make things right. By the way, did you know that the protagonists of the story, Team Buckler, are actually inspired by Rimbombee-anon's team in Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Rescue Team DX? (Spike Chunsoft, 2020, directed by Shin-Ichiro-Tomie, by the way.) It goes to show how inspiration for a great story can come from any place.

"It's always fun learning about what inspires people." Yado says while fiddling with his empty cigarette carton. "Well Gabe, once we get this little errand done, we can get back to our job of investigating that Clover Guild. After getting something to smoke, of course."

Finding a place that does coffee wouldn't hurt, either.

"That'd be nice. We should be able to get this done pretty quickly, as long as we don't get caught up in any other little side quests." Yado states as he takes the path out of town.

Yado the Slowking was never seen in Capim Town again.