Gabby & Friends
In
Swap Meat
It's a lovely evening get together in the Whitman household, a potluck where everyone brought something to the table
Francis brought a homemade blueberry pie
Zag brought some mashed potatoes
Marty begrudgingly brought some human's sick idea of ambrosia
Anon and Mikey had made a nice Caesar Salad and bought a bottle of apple cider for the kids to enjoy
"Welcome everyone, just leave your stuff in the kitchen and we'll get things set up soon." Jonah announced, wearing something fancy Gabby picked out for him
Gabby wore a beautiful flapper dress, complete with shoes and headdress
While everyone conversed and the kids played in Joy's room, someone knocked on the front door...
-
Before Francis could open the door, with a single kick the entrance was slammed open, revealing a spiffy Inco was the one who gave the front door a roundhouse kick
"Ha! Boom baby!"
Lucy chuckled and moved ahead of him, "You always knew how to make an entrance."
"Thank you honey."
As the door closed behind them a flattened Francis lay dizzy on the wall. "W-welcome in Inco & Lucy."
Lucy helped peel Francis off the wall and set him down on the couch
"Samson! Joy! Your Uncle Inco is here!"
Suddenly rushing down the stairs came the two, cheering all hyper and excited to see their cool uncle
-
"Settle down little ones. You guys like presents?"
"I do I do!"
Gabby quickly stepped in, "Inco, are you sure these gifts are safe? And where's Damien?"
"Oh Francine is watching over him, I'm sure the two are tearing up the house."
Cut to Francine and Damien watching telenovelas, both very invested
"Well, okay. Just don't give them anything poisonous or dangerous."
"Yes ma'am." Inco salutes, as Gabby flutters away he makes a silly face in her direction to amuse the kids, "talk about miss party pooper am I right?"
The kids nod and chuckle
"That's what I thought. Now Joy I heard you like butterflies, so I got you a butterfly knife." He produces a balisong, but it was plastic and dull. "It's a toy but imagine the cool tricks you could do with it."
"Thank you Uncle Inco!" Joy took the knife and began to fiddle around with it, heading to her room
"And for you Samson, I got you... A plastic baseball bat! I mean I've noticed all the balls getting into my backyard." He then whispered, "Maybe you could smash one of Marty's windows with it."
"Thanks Uncle Inco, you're the best!" Samson ran off to find Joy
The chatting and partying left no one to watch for Francis's pie on the windowsill
The Beezy twins were hiding in the bushes nearby, as their little communication device turned on to reveal Azzy on the other end
-
"Have you dunderdemons made it?"
"Target is in sight your rottedness." BeezyM shouted before getting his mouth zipped by BeezyF
"Pipe down dummy."
"Now, do you have the poison?"
BeezyF pulled it from her tattered robes, "Right here."
"Excellent! Now put it in that pastry before they get to dessert. Once they take a bite, soon they will drop like flies. And NO ONE WILL STAND IN MY WAY OF REIGNING SUPREME!"
The twins clapped, "Enough applause! Get to it!" Azzy shouted before shutting off the feed
"Now Beezy. I want you to pour it onto the pie, it'll soak in. Do NOT under any circumstances drink it." BeezyF stressed
BeezyM nodded, one eye looking the opposite direction before taking the vial and crawling towards the house
He made it to the window and uncorked the vial with a loud pop, then quickly began to pour the purplish poison onto the pie
He watched it sink into the crush and filling underneath, only to duck down before Jonah came to remove the pie from the windowsill
BeezyM ran back when no one was looking, diving into the bushes
"And now we watch and wait " BeezyF stared into the house while BeezyM chewed on his own arm.
"I taste good." Beezy spoke with a mouthful of arm
-
Meanwhile in the dining room all the people had gathered to enjoy this meal, saying a prayer first of course and then digging into the smorgasbord
Jonah revealed the crowning jewel of the potluck, a honeyed ham he cooked to perfection. He even gave pineapple ring eyes and cherry pupils, and a cherry nose
The group began to converse while the little kids sat at the kids table with their food
After everyone had finished, Inco had made the adults and children drinks, of course he didn't give the kids alcohol... Yet
But he decided to give a toast, "I'd like us to raise a glass to Jonah and Gabby. For being our wonderful host & hostess."
All in unison cheered and drank, only to hear Inco begin to laugh, "And now the really fun part starts."
Zag was the first to ask, "What did you do?"
"Oh nothing, just laced your drinks with this!" Inco revealed a dropper vial with a labeled that said, Miracle Fruit oil
"Miracle fruit... Have you taken extract of the Apple of Eden?!" Marty almost flew out of his chair in rage
"Hold it boy scout. I haven't touched for low hanging fruit. You see, this stuff makes sour stuff taste sweet and vice versa."
The tables go from worried to amused at this revelation
"Now who wants dessert?!"
-
The miracle fruit oil made the ambrosia and pie taste even better, everyone had a slice, even the kids
"Oho they ate it! We gottem now sis!"
BeezyF bopped BeezyM on the head, "Quiet you! They'll catch us if we're too loud."
"What are they gunna do? They're good as dead."
Their bickering was interrupted by the sudden sounds of bodies falling to the floor
The two poked their heads in through the window, the poison worked
They were all dead
Both Beezy's cheered and danced, before BeezyF fires up the communication device, "Devilish Duo to Big Beast."
"Who said we were using codenames? And tell me Beezy hasn't gotten caught in a fence again."
"No your evilness, it worked. They're all dead! The angels the humans the nephilim even Lucy."
Azzy let out a maniacal laughter, "Yes I did it! IIII DID IT! I FINALLY WON!!!"
But a small noise interrupted the premature celebration
A groan was heard from the body of Jonah...
-
"What!? How is he still alive?!" BeezyF shouted before covering her mouth and ducking underneath the window, then pulling BeezyM down since he was staring vacantly
Meanwhile Jonah looked around his head dizzy from that terrible feeling he had, was the blueberry pie undercooked?
He looked around to see he was kinda small, and he could hear and see much more than before, "Gabby?" said the voice of Zag as he spoke
Jonah looked down at himself, and yelled out in shock, he was in Zaggy's body!
"Guys! Wake up! Something's happened to us!"
Jonah then heard his voice, "Oh fuck me running that felt like a terrible hangover."
He saw his own body get up and dust itself off
"Hey! Who are you and what are you doing in my body?" Jonah shouted at the unknown bodysnatcher
"Zag? What do you mean your body? And why do I feel so fat?" The person using Jonah's body and voice looked at himself, "What the Hell!?!"
Jonah knew of one guy who swore like that, "Inco?"
"Jonah? What are you doing in Zag?"
"I could ask the same about you being in me."
They then heard a bloodcurdling scream, the body of Angel Gabby seemed to be freaking out, "What happened to me!? I have these lumps on my chest and I feel so old."
Jonah and Inco knew that that must be Samson in Gabby's body
Soon one by one people began to wake up
Zag was in Francis
Francis was in Inco
Gabby was in Anon
Mikey was in Lucy
Joy was in Mikey
And Anon was in Marty
"Wait, then where's Marty?" Jonah asked, before everyone looked over and saw an embarrassed Joy walk into the living room...
"You gotta be fucking kidding." Inco curses
-
"Don't look at me. I'm a freak." Marty said, feeling very emotional for once in his life
Gabby stomped over, "If you do anything with my daughter's body I will personally make sure you meet with Lucifer."
Inco laughed before everyone turned to him
"What? What did I do?"
"You're the one who put that stuff in our drinks! I'd say it's fair to assume you did this to us!"
Mikey then realized Samson's body didn't get occupied, so it's essentially unconscious
"Look I just wanted us to have a good time. Not turn this into a massive edition of Freaky Friday!"
As Inco fruitlessly tried to defend himself, BeezyF was chewing out BeezyM
"Give me that vial!" She snatches it and looks at the crumpled label, it wasn't a poison. It was Swap Meat! A tonic that causes those who drink it to switch bodies, having their new body's voice and everything
BeezyF crushed the vial in her hand and began to glow red with rage, "YOU MENTALLY DEFICIENT PIECE OF ERRANT FLESH! CAN'T YOU MANAGE ONE SINGLE SIMPLE TASK SUCH AS GRABBING A VIAL LABELED POISON!?!"
The yelling caused the ruckus inside to stop, as everyone was looking out the window at the lady bunny beating on the other
"GET EM!" Zag shouts in Francis's fat figure, he tries to do the athletics he could normally do... Only to find himself becoming winded and tired, "whew... whew... Francis... When this is over... You're going... On a diet!"
The demon hares attempted to run, but a tackle from Jonah and Anon got the two pinned
Gabby stood over the two, "Take us to Azzy."
"I can do no such thing." BeezyF argued
"Anon, tear her arms off."
"Oh you mean that Azzy." BeezyF speedily began to change her mind on resisting
-
Azzy was grumbling to himself in Hell
"D'ohhh! Curse those defective demon hares! I ought to get better minions! Perhaps the layer of Wrath will have some suitable candidates."
As he planned to hire his bara demon escorts a portal opened up in Hell, spitting out the body swapped bunch
Azzy turned to see the horde
"Oh! Company! It's so good to see you all!"
The gang approached him, each member angrier than the last
"Look I'm sure we can hash this out. Maybe this is for the best right?" He hid behind his stone throne as they got closer and closer
"Okay okay! With blood red and ash gray I reverse your body swap curse away."
And like that the souls of each individual began to return to their original bodies, most left to return to Earth, except for three
Marty, Gabby, and Mikey
"Marty, Mikey. Teach him a lesson." Gabby smugly said before returning to Edenville
Marty grabbed Azzy by the ears and lifted him up, "Tell me Azzy, have heard of the burning bush?"
Azzy seemed confused, before realizing what he meant
"AAAAAAAAAAA!"
-
After leaving Azzy a charred and slashed up skeleton, the two exited Hell to see people were helping clean up the aftermath of this debacle
Everyone went to bed feeling a little off, but they began to understand the shoes of the ones they were swapped into
All except for Marty, who couldn't get a wink of sleep, he not only had walked a mile in Joy's tiny little shoes. But he felt human emotions, granted they were immature but that's understandable
Another crack formed in the archangels shell around his heart