The Terrible Phantasmagoria of Being and Becoming Komachi Onozuka

Anon had been overjoyed when he one day found himself in the body of Komachi Onozuka. Of course it had been very confusing at first and for a long time Anon had thought he was stuck in a dream. It wouldn't have been weird of Anon to dream of Komachi, as she was the sexiest of the Touhou girls in Anon's mind. Of course dreaming of being her...well, that's a bit strange.

As some twist of fate would have it, it was no dream. Anon had indeed woken up on Komachi's boat, drifting downstream the Sanzu driver with a dead soul in tow. Somehow Anon had known intuitively what he had to do, where he had to steer and where he could take it easy. Komachi must have done the journey literally countless times. Like an assembly line worker forced to do the same task over and over again for years, Komachi's body had learned the routine and could operate even with Anon's mind in her body.

Only on the fourth trip up the Sanzu to get another new poor soul Anon had started thinking that perhaps he wasn't dreaming. Anon gave his new body's round cheeks a hard pinch and did not wake up. A pinch to the left nipple or buttocks didn't wake him up either. Neither did pinching any other part of the body, not even the most sensitive spot in lady's body which Anon unwisely tested, yelping out in severe pain.

Anon gazed at the surface of the Sanzu River. It was hardly a perfect mirror, but it did confirm that what he was looking at indeed was no-one else but Komachi herself. She appeared a bit more muscular and wide-shouldered than most art Anon had seen would depict her as being, but it made sense. She had rowed up and down the Sanzu river who knows many times, so of course such would require some strenght. Komachi's breasts were however exactly as big as Anon had imagined, enormous and soft, but not quite saggy. Her waistline wasn't quite thin as Anon had hoped, but it was compensated by wide hips, thick thighs and a massive ass. Anon found himself thinking that this version of Komachi would have made the perfect wife for a farmer. It was if she was built to pull out beets, wrestle pigs and birth children with ease. But here she was, stuck ferrying souls.

At first Anon quite enjoyed being Komachi Onozuka. The air around Sanzu was hardly fresh, but at least he was getting regular excercise. The sights around the river were still fresh, and Anon marveled at the occasional sight of strange aquatic life in the river. There was even some excitement as Anon had to shoo off phantoms of titanic extinct marine life with his scythe. He listened to the stories of the dead souls with interest.

Anon even gets to meet Eiki Shiki, who apparently arranged regular performance reviews for her subordinates. Eiki didn't quite look like most art of her that Anon had seen either. Anon didn't know what tomboys turn into when they grow up, but what he is looking at is most definitively that. It's not that Eiki looked like a man, she is quite pretty in fact. Nevertheless, something about her short hair, relatively small breasts, style of dress and relatively short stature compared to Komachi made her look a bit boyish in Anon's eyes. She had a bizarre autistic smile on her face most of the time, which confused Anon a bit at first. Then he remembers that Eiki indeed had such a smile in Phantasmagoria of Flower View. Zun must have known something, because he really nailed it. Eiki gave slightly confused praise to Anon, saying that Komachi has performed her duties better than in ages and encouraged Anon to keep up the good work.

During the breaks that his tight schedule permitted Anon would of course masturbate furiously, exploring every inch of his new body. Komachi's breats were so wonderful to touch and Anon loved massaging them. Learning to enjoy Komachi's pussy had taken a while, as Anon was a straight anon and had never put even his fingers inside him in his previous life. But once had overcome his inhibitions and acknowledged that it wasn't gay to finger himself now that he was in a woman's body he started finding fingering Komachi's wet hole and rubbing her clit most enjoyable.

Somewhere between soon enough and several aeons later it all however starts getting rather dull. Almost every day is exactly the same. Anon rows up and down the Sanzu River. His back has a constant dull ache and Anon is not sure if it's the rowing or the massive tits causing it. Anon grows tired of the tales of the dead, their confused, sad pleas and the endless cavalcade of cancers, car accidents and suicides. The occasional struggles with perished marine life are the biggest highlights, but the fifteenth time of seeing a plesiosaur doesn't quite rouse the same emotions as the first time. The scenery, never much to look at, fades into a grey mush. The constant masturbation is simultaneously becoming both dull and ever-more irresistible as the boredom of the job grind Anon down.

Anon finds himself truly turning into Komachi. He is napping frequently. His breaks stretch beyond the accepted limits. He is drawn to take shortcuts. Komachi is supposed to use her ability to manipulate distances to give the deceased a longer trip the more they have sinned but Anon is tempted to just give everyone the shortest possible trip. Eiki becomes disapointed in Anon once again.

But as Anon is not just Komachi but firstly and foremostly Anon, he starts truly slipping and badly. He finds the call to play with his tits and massage his crotch irresistible even during times when there is a soul on the boat. At first he fights it back. Then he starts playing with himself in front of male souls that died virgin, thinking that it's an act of justice to give them a sight of Komachi's massive tits and juicy pussy before they are sent in front of the Yama. Then he tries to let the phantoms fuck him, but it's useless, their incorporeal bodies offering or receiving no sensation. There's something really cute about them humping and squirming around his body in frustration though that makes Anon's orgasms from pussy-rubbing a bit stronger and brighter. Then Anon decides to start offering his ”special service” not to only to dead virgin men but also to dead lesbian women, because it's not really gay if he is actually a man, right, and then just regular dead men and then he tries to get on with ever those souls that are not interested in Komachi in the slightest. And eventually someone, despite Anon making them pledge not to, tells the Yama.

”KOMACHIIIIIII!!!!” The Yama is furious, her face is beet red and her hands are shaking in rage. ”I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!”
Anon sits silently in the very uncomfortable chair opposite of her and tries to look at Eiki as little as possible. He has screwed up big time.
”DON'T JUST SIT THERE IN SILENCE! EXPLAIN YOURSELF!” Anon has never seen Eiki this furious.
”I-I, well, uhh, you see, umm, errr...it gets so lonely in the Sanzu River.” Anon eventually manages to stutter out something like a coherent sentence.
”Well it's never been a problem for you before! Do you understand how a big violation of our rules this is!?” Eiki seems to have calmed down a slight bit, but she really isn't any less scarier, staring judgementaly at Anon.
”W-well...things have c-changed and, uhhh, I thought...I thought I was doing a s-service to the dead...” Anon withers under the Yama's condemning gaze.
”Good grief! You know that we don't develop personal relations with the dead! We ship and process them and that's it! And what do you mean things have changed?”
”U-uhm...e-errrr...a-aaa” Anon stumbles with his words. Why the hell did he say that things had changed? He can't say that he really isn't Komachi. ”W-well, s-something j-just i-is d-d-d-different and...uhm...I d-din't used to get s-so lonely but...d-don't you ever get lonely, E-Eiki-sama?”
Eiki frowns. ”I don't see how that is relevant.” But there is a flash of...something else in her expression. Sadness? Loneliness?

Anon doesn't know why he does what he does next. Is he just so desperate? Stupid? Did he die of terminal-stage cumbrain having read one doujin too many and thus send his soul into the afterworld? Or are these...some kind of residual feelings Komachi had?
”H-hey, E-Eiki-sama...I...I've had f-f-feelings for you for a long time...” Anon finds himself stuttering out. Does he really?
Eiki's expression changes in an instant from disaproval to shock. ”What?”
”T-that's why...my body is constantly c-craving for your presence, Eiki-sama. I can't focus at work...all I want to do is be with you, Eiki-sama.” Anon's body lifts itself off the chair and starts aproaching Yama, who is sitting on the other side of the desk.
”K-Komachi! This is most inaproriate!” Anon is sure that is just shyness talking. Eiki looks so adorable in her confusion.
Anon keeps on aproaching Eiki. ”I want you, Eiki-sama...if you would be my side I could focus at work again...”
”You're my subordinate! This is sexual harassment!”, Eiki yelps, as Anon gets ever closer, bends and starts embraching the Yamaxanadu. It's even cuter when it's her squirming and not some phantom, Anon is sure that once Eiki properly buries her face on his tits she will relax and return his feelings and-

BONK!

Anon had completely forgotten about the Rod of Remorse that Eiki always carries with her. And that Eiki has probably countless millenia of excercise in hitting people with it. It's a terrifyingly hard blow from someone of such short and slim physique, and whatever sin had remained written on it must have been a dire one for the Rod to be so heavy. Anon reels back and collapses on the floor.

While Anon is stunned by the blow the Yama pulls out her Cleansed Crystal Mirror. Everybody, including Anon, always forgets the existence of this dreadful artefact. As Anon opens his eyes he finds himself staring into a mirror image the rapidly turns into a backwards reel of all the sins he has ever committed. First there is a torrent of lewd scenes on the Sanzu River, then it gets to Anon's life before he was Komachi. It shows everything, absolutely everything, and Anon feels like he is crushed under a tidal wave of shame that would make his balls wither if he still had them.

At some point after the reel had rewound to Anon's old life Eiki had barked ”GUARDS!!!!” as loud she could. Somehow she is able to see what is in the mirror from the other side, and now she knows that Anon is really not Komachi. It's funny how much fiction glossess over the functioning of organizations in it. The Yama has a whole massive bureacracy behind her, and it includes guards. Strong arms belonging to black-clad characters one will never see in any Touhou media drag Anon toward dreadful chambers that will never be shown in any game or manga.

Anon is tortured.

Not like in the great many hentai doujins that he has seen during his lifetime. He is hit, abused, deprived of sleep and food. He is waterboarded and prodded with hot pokers and submerged into cold water. It's not that Anon is lying, he begs, whimpers and insists that he is telling the truth as he is. It's that Eiki and her servants simply do not understand what is a ”computer” or ”4chan” or an ”anon”. They do not understand what is ”Touhou Project” or a ”videogame”.

And most of all, what the bureacracy of the Yamaxanadu doesn't understand is that torture doesn't make people tell the truth. It makes them say anything to make the torture to stop. It's most effective at making people incriminate themselves in things that didn't happen. Thankfully Eiki is only interested in the truth, and Anon is desperately trying to tell it, but they just can't understand it. Anon is but a simple anon, but under torture even the simplest human becomes a great artist in the field of confabulation, and eventually Anon has spun a narrative that satisfies his captors.

For a day or two he is left alone. He is even given soup to eat instead of insects and excrement. Then the cell door opens again, and this time it's Eiki Shiki herself, carrying some kind of a small box with her. Anon drops onto all fours and starts pleading and begging.
”Please please please please please I've told you the truth already so many times don't hurt me again I'm so sorry...” the shameful display drags on as Anon vomits one apology after another.

”Get up. I believe you. I just need to go through the facts one last time.” Eiki's voice is back to what it was when Anon first me, not filled with anger or disgust as it had been lately. Anon stands up. His bruised form is naked before the Yamaxanadu. Standing up like this in front of her has started feeling shameful and wrong, but if she insists, Anon will comply.

Eiki is holding some kind of a small jar. She takes whatever substance is in there to her fingertips and starts spreading it on one of the many wounds on Anon's body, starting from his face. Anon expects it to hurt terribly, but all he feels is pleasant tingle. Is the Yama...nursing him?
”You come from the Outside World?” Eiki asks, in neutral tone, smiling her autistic smile.
”Correct.”
”You were part of a sect of wizards known as The Four Channels?”
”Yes, that is right.”
”And in this sect you were part of a smaller sect that studied the affairs of Gensokyo and realms connected to it?” Eiki continues spreading the palm on his upper body. Once upon a time Anon would have felt tremendous arousal at Eiki touchings his tits, but now he just feels a sense of relief as the healing balm eases the terrible aching caused to his former sources of joy by days or weeks of abuse and torture.
”Yes.”

”You joined this sect because you had a perverse interest in obtaining lewd imagery of the inhabitants of Gensokyo?” Eiki's voice was slighty sterner than before.
Anon hesitates for a second. ”Yes.”
”Members of The Four Channels use so-called Computers, scrying devices used in the outside world to view events unfolding in Gensokyo and other realms?”
”That is correct.” Anon is almost proud of the narrative he has spun.
”These Computers can also capture images of things that were viewed on them?” Eiki is rubbing the balm on a wound that is on Anon's hips and ass. Anon finds himself involuntarily trembling a bit.
”Yes.”
”These Computers were also used to create a kind of miniature version of Gensokyo where a series of magical combat excercises known as Computer Games were played out?”
”Correct.” Eiki has now knelt and is spreading the ointment on Anon's legs. Anon finds himself quite bothered at this. Were Eiki not looking up at his face, she would be staring more less straight into his pussy.
”These Computer Games are used to prepare an invasion of Gensokyo?”
”Yes.”
”The Touhou or Shrine Maiden project is a particular Computer Game prepared with the intent to capture, subvert and pervert Reimu Hakurei, Shrine Maiden of the Hakurei Shrine and her best friend, Marisa Kirisame, the Black Magician?”
The tiniest urge to laugh visited Anon, but he maintained his composure. This was an insane absurd farce. ”Yes.”

”Members of The Four Channels also use a magical device known as an Image Board. This Image Board works on pictures taken from Gensokyo through Computers?”
”That is correct.”
”The purpose of this Image Board is to swap out the souls of the user and a target in Gensokyo or other realms?”
The Yama is now tending the wounds at his feet. Anon feels uncomfortable, this isn't right. The mighty terrifying Yamaxanadu should not be kneeling in front of him like this.
”Yes.”
”You were not fully aware of what this Image Board does when you volunteed to be a test subject for it's functioning?”
”That is correct.”
”You were led to believe that you would temporarily assume the form of Komachi Onozuka, Guide of the Sanzu River.”
”Correct.”
”You wished to do this as a form of sexual perversion.”
The slightest tinge of hesitation visited Anon. ”Yes.”
”Spread your legs.”
At first Anon say ”Yes”, as if by automation, but doesn't really understand. Spread his legs? What a weird question. Then Eiki orders him to do so again and Anon understands and hesitantly complies.

Eiki is now spreading the balm on the inner side of his legs..
”I, Eiki Shiki, Yamaxanadu, am in one of these Computer Games?”
”Yes.”
"Were you preparing an invasion of my domain?"
"Not me personally."
Eiki's hands are steadily creeping ever more upwards.
"In this Computer Game, am I depicted as being powerful?" There is a strange tone to the question.
"Very much so."
”You have seen obscene images of me?”
Anon hesitates.
”Have you or have you not?”
”Y-yes.”
”Did you sexually gratify yourself while viewing these images?”
Eiki's hands are getting closer and closer to an area where they shouldn't be, lest it be sexual harassment.
Anon doesn't know how to react, but he knows lying is useless. ”I did.”

Eiki is tending to Anon's inner thighs, getting closer to Anon's genitals and Anon is getting severely confused. Surely this is not standard interrogation procedure even here?
”What is the purpose of Image Board?”
”To switch the souls of an outside world human and the inhabitant of Gensokyo or related realm”
Anon swears that if Eiki moves her hand even an inch closer she would be touching his vulva.
”How do you know this if you believed it was a device for altering your physical form?”
Anon has rehearsed this narrative upside down and from left to right. He can't be fooled.
”I infered it after the fact after I woke up in Gensokyo.”
”Why did you think that an organization that aims to conquer Gensokyo would build such useless, perverse magical technology as you imagined? That would turn your body into that of Komachi's for a while?”
Eiki is back to standing up straight and her balm-covered hand is stroking Anon's pussy. Anon squirms.
”B-because we are a decadent culture that believes that...we can and should do anything we please with Gensokyo and it's inhabitants...”
”What would you have done if the device had worked as you were led to believe?” Is that...lust in Eiki's voice?
”I-I...another man would have used the same device and then we would have had sex...as women...”
”But that is a homosexual activity?”
Anon knew he couldn't get into the finer details of human sexuality. ”Yes.”
”Would the other man have assumed my form?”
Maybe? Who knows? This is all made up anyway, better not to tell the Yama no. ”That's right...”

Anon is getting wetter and wetter, all the sex talk mixed with Eiki stimulating him is getting into him. This is not good.
”Why would they hide the true nature of Image Board from it's users?”
”I -ah- can, um, only assume they were afraid that there would be no v-volunteers for untested t-tech...” Anon almost slips ”magical techniques...”
”How would they monitor the success of this Image Board?”
”W-well, Komachi's soul would be in my body and...ahh...they might be scrying me too...”
”Do you think they might be scrying you right now?” Eiki pushes her fingers inside Anon.
”D-depends on if they can p-pierce whatever p-protection this place m-may have...”
”May have? Does this place have magical protection or not?” Eiki's voice hardens and she squeezes Anon's clit with her thumb. It's painful.
”I-I don't k-know...I'm barely an initiate in The Four Channels and th-this place is so full of magic it confuses my senses...”
”If they would be capable of scrying you right now, would they be masturbating?”
Anon knows his fellow anons. ”Undoubtedly...”

By this point Eiki is just straight up finger-fucking Anon. Is the Yama herself just a pervert too? Did she get excited at the prospect of others watching her fingering tortured, bruised Komachi? Anon moans and gives replies to Eiki's increasingly intermitent questions, hoping that the pleasure is not fogging his head too much. It's terrible, unbearable, and feels less and less like an interrogation every passing second. Eiki just stands there, one hand in Anon's pussy, one on hus hips and smiles in a slightly more hornier, mischievious way than she usualy does. Anon finds himself hoping Eiki would grab his ass or suck on his tits or maybe insert something more substantial into him. Not that he expected the Yama to have a metaphorical rod of remorse in her pants, but the literal one is right there, hanging on her belt...

Why is Eiki like that? Does she enjoy this, is she so autistic that this is her idea of sex? Is she just torturing Anon in another way, a way more like all the doujins he has read? Is Eiki torturing Komachi sexually for her own enjoyment? Anon is terrified to move without being instructed but he wants so bad to adjust his position so that Eiki's fingers would slide into him from a bit more pleasurable angle. It's all so frustrating, so terribly frustrating, her pussy is making a loud wet noise as Eiki's fingers move in and out and soon enough the frustration boils over and he orgasms, screaming and shivering patheticaly.

Eiki pulls her fingers out and as much as Anon wants to stay upright, he finds himself slumping to the ground. He is a pathetic, bruised, moist mess and Eiki is wiping her fingers on a handerchief that she has taken out of the small box she has with her.

”I believe you. You have provided us with most interesting information”, Eiki speaks out.
Anon doesn't know what to say. Will he be freed? What does being freed even mean in this context? Will this be the end of the torture at the very least?

Eiki picks up the box and gestures for Anon to follow her as she leaves the cell. The two walk in silence for a while untill the reach another room. It's a much nicer room than the terrible torture cell. Anon thinks it's some kind of a medical room. It has all kinds of supplies and what looks like a wooden examination table in there.

”There's one last thing though”, Eiki says, settling the box on a table and pulling out a small, clear glass bottle from the box and offers it to Anon.
”What is this?”
”It's a gift from Hecatia. Drink it up. Everything will go back to normal in no time at all after you drink it”, Eiki says calmly. She's back to smiling that autistic smile.

Gift from Hecatia? Anon thought the two didn't know each other, but then again, apparently the Touhou project was not a perfect representation of Gensokyo or it's connected realms. If the Yama can be a torturer and a pervert, then sure, Hecatia can be her friend. Is this some kind of a potion that will send his soul back? A goddess like Hecatia could surely find something like that. As he opens the bottle it smells and tastes just like water. Anon drinks it up happily.

If Anon had read his Greek myths more carefully he might have been alarmed at the prospect of being offered water in the underworld, particularly one supposedly coming from a Greek goddess. What he has just downed is a bottle of water from River Lethe, one of the great many tributaries of River Sanzu. If Anon had only known that all the myths about rivers separating life from death were not only true, but connected to each other! If Anon had only known that Hecatia always had one of her bodies back in her ancestral homeland! Lethe isn't just any underworld river though. It's dark waters have a magical power of forgetfulness and it no longer matters whose soul sits in Komachi's body. Everything will be back to normal in no time at all.

Komachi Onozuka finds herself in a terrible state of confusion with a slightly boyish looking green haired woman looking at her. She must be in some kind of a medical room. She yelps out in horror as she sees how naked and wounded she is.
”Komachi, my dear friend, you have been in a most terrible accident”, Eiki speaks out.
”W-what happened!?” Komachi doesn't even remember her own name, let alone that of the woman in front of her.
The woman in front of her is putting a blanket onto Komachi.
”You fell asleep for too long and drifted into River Lethe. Your boat crashed, wounding you. Worse, you sank into the waters of forgetfullness.” The green haired woman is smiling a compassionate, beatiful smile. Komachi feels the most vague sense of recollection. She thinks she may have seen that smile a thousand times, and that she liked the person in front of her very much. Her mind doesn't remember, but the reactions to Eiki's smile have carved themselves into Komachi's very body.

It takes a very long time for Komachi to piece it all back together. But while she puts her self and life together, she can still work. She is Komachi Onozuka, Guide of the River Sanzu, ferrywoman of the dead, working for Shiki Eiki, Yamaxanadu. Her body remembers. She knows intuitively what she has to do, where she has to steer and where she can take it easy. Komachi must have done the journey literally countless times. Like an assembly line worker forced to do the same task over and over again for years, Komachi's body had learned the routine and could operate even with a mind without memories of the past in her body.