Anthology of Sapling Greentexts and Shitposts

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Life Cycle of a Sapling

How are saplings made? Are saplings canonically shaped like mini versions of Fauna? Do their voices sound like her?

The sapling life cycle is as follows

Infant sapling sprouts from soil
Infant sapling fed diet of baby food, compost, sunlight, and breast milk for one to two years.
Infant sapling enters torpor, forming a "cocoon" of bark that leaves only its stem exposed.
After two to four months of gestation, a fully grown sapling emerges.

At this point, sapling growth diverges down of one of two paths.

The majority of grown saplings live for around two to three years before dying of natural causes or comical mishaps.
Sapling remains decompose, fertilize the surrounding soil, and usually leave behind half-a-dozen seeds.
Over the course of nine months, these seeds will germinate into infant saplings, eventually sprouting and starting the cycle anew.

Roughly one-in-twenty five saplings instead continue growing in response to environmental and social factors. They grow larger, develop female sexual characteristics, and become vastly more intelligent over the course of their lifespan. These saplings mature into kirins, who serve as the caretaker and shepherd of their lesser kin.
Truly fascinating.

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Am I the only one hung up on the image of Fauna breastfeeding one of these saplings?

Am I the only one hung up on the image of Fauna breastfeeding one of these saplings?
Just picture Fauna finding a lost sapling out in the woods at night, tired, scared, and hungry. She lets it bounce up into her loving arms and embraces the poor, shivering, scared little sapling with all the warmth she can muster. It whimpers softly. It's losing color in its leaves. It's starving.
That's when Fauna smiles and whispers to the sapling that everything will be alright. She pulls down her dress and draws the sapling closer. Her motherly affection resonates, and childlike instinct compels the quivering sapling's lips to furtively latch onto her breast. The sapling is so cold, but mommy's skin is so warm. Its leaves wiggle with delight. The sapling teases her nipple with its tongue. Fauna giggles at the sensation, gently rubbing its head to encourage it. The sweet taste of milk, however, is enough to incite the sapling to begin suckling more and more, before slowing into long, smooth gulps. The fearful tears at the edges of its eyes have dried, and are replaced by a serene, almost blissful expression as warm milk fills its belly and mommy's hand caresses its head.
Fauna whispers that everything will be alright now. Everything will be okay. The color returns to the sapling's cheeks as mommy's sweet, creamy milk nurses it back to life. Its suckling slows. Its lips unlatch. It looks up at Fauna, and a small burp rises from its throat. Fauna giggles. The sapling smiles. Fixing her dress, Fauna brings the sapling back into a cradle, turning back towards her cottage and into the peaceful night.

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Lost Sapling

Playing outside with Fauna and the rest of the saplings

I was on a day trip with Mommy Fau-Fau and the other saplings but I tripped and fell and when I came to I was here. Guys where am I? Where's Mommy? Guys please I'm hearing scary noises and seeing a squirrel tail in the corner of my vision! Mommy where are you-uuuuu?!

Accidentally trip and clip into the geometry
Fall out of bounds and into the skybox, plummeting through the void for all eternity

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!
HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLPP!!!
AAAAAAAIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

Lose track of time. The sun never moves. NOTHING ever moves... except for you. You're always moving, always falling, straight down.
You can't sleep. The sound of wind rushing past you is deafening. You're falling face first. You lost the strength to turn over after just a few moments in this hell. Your eyes are dry. You can't keep your mouth closed.
The hunger is terrible. The thirst is worse. But worst of all? You miss mommy...

uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu...
mooommmmmmmyyyyyy...
uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu...
i wan...... i wannn go hoooooooomeeeeee...
moooooooooooommmmmmyyyyyy faaaaaau-faaaaauuuuuuuuuuuuuu...

The constant falling. The constant noise. The constant pain. You lose your mind long before death embraces you.
You are no longer a sapling. You are a plummeting sack of meat, filled with dying organs and bones shattered by g-force. Suffering is the only thing that registers to your rapidly fading mind.
You're outside! With the other saplings! With Fauna! You're playing tag out in the meadow! You're laughing! Mommy's laughing! The sun is setting now, though. You saplings are all joining hands now as mommy leads you back to the cottage for supper. Today, you get to hold mommy's hand. You're so happy.
You're so happy.

uuu uuuuuuuuu uuuu
mmm mmm mmmmmmmm
mmommmyuuu uuu u...
...
...
...

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Introduction to Sapling Domestication

What if i set all the saplings on fire? Will that shut them up?

Unfortunately, that just makes them scream louder.

Not OP but I’d just make the fire hotter. I mean, what are the saplings going to do, not burn to death?

A friend of mine is a sapling breeder who talks about this shit all the time.
Basically burning a sapling dead or alive causes the ashes to spread more seeds in soil than a regular burial would, leading to more saplings. The temperatures required to utterly sterilise a sapling's remains would require an actual incinerator.

A ... Sapling breeder? Like a gardener?

He breeds domesticated saplings for purchase, which means learning a lot about their biology and behavior.
Botany is a big part of it, obviously, but also crap like behavioral psychology, knowing all of the stuff you need to take care of one, etc. etc.

What are non domesticated saplings like?

They're the ones that live out in the woods with a Fauna. "Domesticated" is kind of a misnomer given that they usually live in a house with her, but it's an apt enough term for describing a sapling kept by a human as a pet instead, especially given how you need to condition them like one.

You'd actually be shocked by how simple you can pull it off. It's not easy, but it's doable.

Infant saplings, the green plant balls with the leaves on their heads, don't really have the cognitive ability to understand who Fauna is. They aren't mentally developed enough to understand such things yet. But they do get stressed out when they go long periods without stimuli from Fauna even if they've never seen her before in their entire lives. This is why it's recommended that you buy things like a speaker to play her music, pictures of Fauna, or a doll for it to imprint upon. Once you have those, the "separation anxiety" they experience is mitigated.

Grown saplings, the tiny little Faunas, are more complicated. Fauna quickly imprints upon them as their mother, and pretty much nothing can dissuade them from that notion. Like an infant sapling, you can soothe this somewhat with Fauna-related stimuli, but they will miss Fauna given a prolonged absence from her and begin suffering from intense anxiety attacks. This is why, for at least four hours a day, it's recommended that you place a sapling before a screen with Fauna's stream on it, otherwise the stress of separation can and will lead to health complications. VODs work too, but loose their effectiveness over time. The fact that a grown sapling is usually so attached to Fauna leads to a lot of pet owners get rid of their saplings once they reach maturity, since it's such a hassle to keep it from freaking out.

As for your water question, you only need to water your infant sapling like a plant. Their "skin" is actually a woven mesh of roots that absorb water, which they need to survive. The same applies to their growth cycle. This is also the reason why you don't bathe an infant sapling in soapy water, since it's potentially toxic. Grown saplings, however, lose this ability. They consume all sustenance orally, but still need some exposure to the sun to remain active.

Yup. Plenty of writers, artists, scientists, philosophers, and the like have written about saplings throughout history. Their strange behavior and life cycle appealed to a lot of scholars. I think Theophrastus was the first to write a treatise on them, but other mentions of saplings allegedly go back to ancient Mesopotamia and China.

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Introduction to Sapling Psychology

Can I take a sapling home like it was a stray animal?

You can, but without fauna you can expect it to die in 2-3 days.

And not peacefully. It will be wailing nonstop for the first 24 hours away from Fauna, then it's vocal cords will cease to function, then it will start spasming and tearing into it's own flesh, eyes, teeth, hair, etc. for the following 24 hours, and for the last 24 hours it will almost entirely cease functioning. It is a grim sight.

I'm a graduate student of psychology whose worked with saplings in lab conditions for several years now. Saplings tend to make great test subjects because of their uniform predictability and unique response to certain psychological triggers, not to mention the fact that they are so numerous and expendable.

A sapling's initial reaction to realizing they are without their oshi is confusion. They become hyperaware and begin searching their surroundings, which inevitably leads to them being overwhelmed by anxiety. When they cannot find her, a sapling will enter a state of distress, screaming and crying in the hopes that she may instead find them. The longer they remain in this state of distress, the more hopeless and despondent they become. Normally, a sapling will pass out from exhaustion within six to twelve hours of wailing, but will continue to be in an agitated state even during rest.

Your post contains a common misconception about sapling psychology and physiology. Saplings only self-harm in response to certain conditions.

After twenty-hour hours without Fauna, a sapling will normally become wholly despondent. They will steadily refuse food and water, instead remaining trapped in a fugue-like depression until either Fauna herself snaps them out of it or they die from dehydration/starvation. Most sapling psychologists believe this depressive state to be caused by a negative feedback loop, in which the sapling convinces itself that Fauna is gone because of something they did. They did something to upset her, they didn't love her enough, whatever the reason, they grow to believe Fauna now hates them personally and is punishing them.

Saplings exhibit self-harming behaviors when an outside source confirms these negative feelings. My professor conducted a famous study in which five saplings, depressed after a full day without Fauna, were herded into a room before a television screen. We then played a doctored video in which Fauna stated that she was graduating because she hated her saplings, before naming each individual sapling in the room as the worst of the lot.

The response was immediate. Every sapling entered a state of distress, screaming with all of their remaining energy, before quickly devolving into an orgy of suicidal violence. One sapling began beating its head against the wall of the chamber until its skull fractured, later dying of a brain hemorrhage. Another stripped itself of its clothing, dived into the screen whilst screaming apologies, before electrocuting itself. A third simply sat in place, incessantly screaming for a full twenty-six hours, before dying of a stroke. The reaction of the other two saplings, however, was of great interest. Instead of harming themselves, the two quickly turned on each other, blaming their opposite for their oshi's graduation. A brief (and pathetic) scuffle ensued, ending when one sapling strangled the other to death. The triumphant sapling, of course, then proceeded to contort its body until snapping its own neck at an unnatural angle.

Very exciting. Very informative. Very funny.

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Do saplings have object permanence?

A dozen saplings sitting in front of a screen
Fauna's stream is on

"aaaaAAAAAaaaa FaaaauNAAAA uuuUUUU!" "Ahahaha! Yaaaaay!" "I love mommy!"

"Alright saplings, I'll see you all soon! Bye-bye!"
All of the saplings start waving goodbye at the screen

"Bye-bye mommy!" "Thank you Fau-Fau!" "I love you mommy!"

Stream ends
One by one, the smiling saplings each blink slowly
Their eyes all widen as they begin to search around the room, confused
Already the tears have begun

"M-Mommy!? Where are you? Mommy!?" "Fauna doko!?" "H-Help! I lost my mommy! uuu!"

Panic sets in, the saplings begin to aimlessly search for Fauna
The search ends almost as soon as it began, with the saplings succumbing to despair

"NO! NOOOOOOOOOO! UUUUUUUUUUUU!!!" "WHERE'S MOMMY!?" "I- I- I MISS FAUNA!"

After a long bout of uncontrollable sobbing, the saplings become manic in their desperation
Some begin running around the room in circles, others begin pounding the wall with their little fists, tugging at their hair, or just screaming at the top of their lungs

"SHE HATES US! SHE HATES US AND SHE'S NEVER COMING BACK!" "WHY MOMMY!? I PROMISE I'LL BE A GOOD SAPLING! PLEASE! WHYYYY!?" "FAUNAAAAA UUUUUUUUUUUU!!!"

The hysteria lasts as long as the saplings still have energy in their little bodies
Once that energy is exhausted, the saplings yet again collapse into despair

"aaaaaaaaaaaaaa" "mm m mommmy" "...uuuuUUUUUuuuuuuuuUUUUUUUUUUuuuuuuuuuu..."

This period of catatonia can last for days on end, perhaps even over a week in length
Days later, the monitor reactivates
Fauna's BGM starts playing as her next stream begins
The familiar sight and sounds of their mother rouses the saplings from their torpor

"uuu..." "hmm?" "mmm..."

Fauna appears onscreen
"Hello. giggle Konfauna."
The saplings, suddenly reinvigorated, quickly spring to their feet

"FAUNA!" "MOMMY'S BACK!"

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Mommy says I've been a good sapling, so I get to be her stool this week!

Mommy says I've been a good sapling, so I get to be her stool this week!

Getting to be near mommy while she's streaming
She's focused on her game, leaning towards her screen
You bounce up and down, trying to get mommy's attention
She has her headset on, so you nuzzle against her leg instead
Fau-Fau sighs, smiling, and reaches down towards you
You shiver as her fingers brush against your leaves
Her one hand wraps around your stem while she continues to game with the other
Fauna continues to focus on streaming while she gently rubs your head
You try to stay quiet while mommy talks with the other saplings, but it feels so good
Mommy keeps rubbing your stem, up and down, up and down
Her fingers softly stroking the tips of your leaves
You start to feel funny all over
You can't help it
"...uuu...uuuuu...uuu!"
She's still streaming, but her hand starts to go faster and faster
Mommy's face is so pretty, her hand feels so soft as she keeps rubbing your stem
Your whole body is shaking
Fau-Fau caresses you from the base of your stem to the tips of your leaves, still talking to her fans
Faster and faster, faster and faster, faster and faster
You can't hold it in anymore
"uuuuuUUUUUUUUUUUuuuuu..."
Clear, sticky sap shoots up and out of your stem as you squeeb all over mommy's hand
You roll backwards, breathing heavy, covered in sap, staring up at Fauna
She looks down at you and mutes her microphone, smiling as she leans down
"Good job! Mommy's so proud of you!"
This is the happiest you've ever felt in your entire life
Mommy cleans up your stem and gives you a kiss on the head
"I'm almost done for tonight. Once I finish, I'll make you a very special dinner for being such a good sapling, okay?"
You nod, happily bouncing away as mommy goes back to her stream
It's good to be a sapling

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I don't think I could ever force myself on a Sapling

rape saplings
rape saplings
RAPE SAPLINGS

What the hell, guys?! I don't think I could ever force myself on an effeminate little Sapling, his petite androgynous frame unable to defend himself from my groping hands and lusty attention. I would be remiss to kiss his soft, svelte neck and touch his slender chest and back. It disgusts me to thin how hard his tiny cock would get as his protests become moans of pleasure. My stomach churns at the thought of picking him up and forcing my cock deep inside of his tight, needy hole. Bile rises in my throat as I envision pounding him from behind, his wrists in my hands as his failed-male cock spurts useless loads onto the bedsheets from a prostate orgasm. And my thoughts are but of revulsion as I imagine what it would be like to cum deep inside him, emptying myself until I am spent as we both collapse, panting, covered in sweat, before we doze off in the afterglow. How sickening.

I don't think I could ever force myself on an effeminate little Sapling, his petite androgynous frame unable to defend himself from my groping hands and lusty attention.

KYAAAA! W-Wait! Stop it! Get off of me! Fauna!? Fauna-doko!? Help me mommy! H-He's- uuu!

I would be remiss to kiss his soft, svelte neck and touch his slender chest and back. It disgusts me to think how hard his tiny cock would get as his protests become moans of pleasure.

N-No! I don't- Stop! Stop it! No! T-That... aaahhh~ S-Stop p-p-please- aaaaAAAHHHH~

Bile rises in my throat as I envision pounding him from behind, his wrists in my hands as his failed-male cock spurts useless loads onto the bedsheets from a prostate orgasm.

AAAAAHHHHH! W-WHAT ARE YOU- UUUUUUU~ It... It hu-hu-hurts! I... AAAAAAHHHH~ UUUUU~ UUUUUUUUUU!~

ˢᵖᵘʳᵗ ˢᵖᵘʳᵗ ˢᵖᵘʳᵗ

AAAAAAAAaaaaaahhhhh~ I can't... I don't know what's... aaaaaaahhhhhhhh~ M-Mommy... H-Heeeelp....

ˢᵖᵘʳᵗ

uuuuuuu~

And my thoughts are but of revulsion as I imagine what it would be like to cum deep inside him, emptying myself until I am spent as we both collapse, panting, covered in sweat, before we doze off in the afterglow.

SPURT

GAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!
W-What... What did you dooooooo- uuuuuuuuuu... I don't... sniffle I don't understaaaaand...
L-Let me go... P-P-Please... I want my mommy... I want Fau-Faaaaauuuuuuuuu...

How sickening.

uuu...

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Sapling Pirates

Be (you), a sapling serving aboard Fauna’s ship
The crew decides, after hours of fearful crying, to launch a mutiny
Draw the short straw, meaning you have to tell her the news
Sneak into her cabin with a flintlock that’s nearly bigger than you are
Find Fauna at her desk
“Sapling? It’s past your bedtime. Did you have a nightmare again?”

“N-No…"

”What’s wrong then? Oh! Are you having trouble loading your pistol again?”

“Mommy- I mean, Cap’n Fauna, I… I’m here ‘cause this is a… a… uuu…”

”Did you have an accident again? Does someone need to go back to wearing their diaper?”

“N-No! A mutiny! I’m gonna- We’re gonna mutiny! A-And take over the ship!”

Fauna laughs, amused
”You’re such a funny little sapling! What can you even do with a ship?”

“I… We… uuu!”

Fauna takes your gun away and scoops you up into her arms.
”Alright, enough silly talk. You’ll need all the rest you can get for tomorrow. We’re going on another raid, after all!”

“… Okay mommy- uuu, I mean, aye-aye C-Cap’n.”

Fauna tucks you back into your bunk
All the saplings forget about mutiny the next day
Die during a boarding action after your pistol’s recoil sends you flying into the ocean

crewmates.... Fauna is leading us to our deaths... I look for guidance and she runs away yelling "uuuuu~"....

Saplings are too small to load the cannons
It takes 5 saplings to load a cannon
Sapling accidentally tumbles into the barrel
"Fire!"
"UUUUUUUuuuuu u u u. . . "
Sapling rockets out of the cannon, their cries getting softer until they harmlessly bounce off the enemy ship

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The Weakest Sapling

Good night my big, strong sapling! Look how much you've grown!

Fauna tucks in all your sapling brothers and sisters, but not you. You are the weakest sapling, always bullied by the others. They all get their share of mommy's milk, but you don't. They're well on their way of being quaking sequioas, whereas you are the weakest, puniest sapling. They all produce so much sap that fauna collects, but you can't manage more than a little spurt. You're out in the living room, shivering and crying

uuuuuuu
uuuuuUUUUUUUUU
UUUUUUU I MISS FAUNA MOMMY WHERE ARE YOUUUUUUuuuuuuu

Using up all your strength, you manage one final cry. A well curved shadow rushes out from the dark.

Oh no!!! I forgot my most precious little sapling!!!!

It's fauna! You would be happy but you have zero energy left. Fauna picks you up, grabs a blanket, and tucks you in to the sofa for a good night kiss.

Now my precious sapling, you know why I can't give you milk. I was smoking and drinking while you were but an acorn, so you're lactose intolerant. I noticed you're not growing at all, and the sun can only do sooooo much. If you can't have my milk... you want... my juice?
yaaaaay mommy fauna i want juice!
OK my dearie...

Fauna puts your favorite pillow under your neck, and instructs you to lie straight on your back. She pulls down her pajama bottoms and underwear, exposing her hairy, but well manicured, nether regions.

I want you to open your mouth, and suck and lick until the juice comes out

She gets on top of you and sits herself on your face. Her legs envelop you, and your mouth is right there. You lick and suck her nether regions, as her juices start to leak

uuuuuu that's my precious little sapling

Her juices taste amazing, nothing like the salty milk and coins the other saplings say. She tastes like the berries her good friend and life partner Aunt Mumei picks for all of us.

oh my, you really like licking me up!

Fauna notices your once frail, limp stem perk up. Normally she wouldn't be able to rub it without ripping your leaves, but it seems like that's but a problem in the past.

You're getting strong! Keep sucking!!!

Fauna starts rubbing your stem back and forth. You feel funny, but it's a good feeling. She's rocking back and forth against your mouth and tongue, basically humping your face. Her rubbing and jerking your stem is making your mouth movements more aggressive

uuuu my mouth is getting tired
keep going my sapling! We're almost there!

Electricity is shooting into your brain. You never felt this good before. Fauna's juices are seeping more and more.

uuuuuuuu i'm about to squeeb mommy
squeeb with me!!!!!
SQUEEEEEEEEEEB
SQUEEEEEEEEEEB

Fauna squirts her juices all in your mouth, filling you right up right as you shoot hot sap all over yourself and fauna. You're tired, but full and content. You never felt like this before. You notice fauna, normally full of energy, just as tired as you

Let's get you cleaned up.

She wipes the sap off of her, then cleans you up.

You're such a big strong sapling now. Do you want to sleep with the other saplings?
yes mommy!!!

Fauna leads you to their bedroom before hesitating

On second thought, do you want to sleep with me every day so I can feed you my special mommy juice?

That could only mean one thing: you will never miss fauna

UUUUUU YES!!!!
that's my sapling!

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19th Century Saplings

Meanwhile in 1800's /vt/
the shrubs cry the name of the lady kirin. why shed tears little ones? why water the earth with your eyes? 'Tis the only way we propagate m'lord. We're blessed with abundance and cry out the Lady's name as we pass by so as the grass grows it knows who to follow when the time comes to arise.

It's...its tiring M'lord but the rise of not only saplings but mandrakes and other flower children are a great boon to the alchemists. I believe one man went with a sapling to find a cure for Polio. Imagine no longer needing an iron lung!
I just hope they cease trying to transmute lead into gold. What good is money in the natural world?

I find myself intrigued in your culture, as well as your views on the natural world. I too am an admirer of the lady kirin and her creations. However my research on others prevents me from settling down with only her.

I am very flattered, but be wary! It is said that the Lady of the Grove can turn men into treants!
Despite how kind they all are, their powers give most pause! Gods and being fickle...not too unusual I suppose.
Mind not their capriciousness however, any investigator is likely to be welcomed warmly, so long as ye are able to handle the eccentricities of each kingdom.
I have heard tales of the devout of time building meat golems to act as an avatar of their lady!
Quite the tall tale I hope. Golems always turn! Perhaps that explains her cavorting.
Oh! Be careful! I just planted some daffodils!
Uuu...I want to hear the story about Johnny Appleseed again...
Thus the medieval gentle class frolic'd with the woodland spirit, one often frequently underutilized in one anon's humble opinion. Merriment was made and wine and ale were passed around. A gentle sapling recommended planting a tree in the center of town so everyone would feel more comfortable in the woods! Shh! Don't let the church know! Uuu!

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Sapling's Big Favor

Fauna takes a confused sapling into her private cottage
Fauna lays down on the bed and asks if you, her favorite sapling, can do her a biiiiiiig favor
Fauna places you between her legs and asks you to keep licking until she asks you to stop
Fauna pulls off her panties and giggle when you get scared by the weird hole in-between her legs
Fauna encourages you to get closer, telling you how you're her bravest sapling
Fauna starts making weird noises when you start licking it
Fauna starts to breathe heavy as you decide to go deeper
Fauna starts to sweat all over, it tastes salty
Fauna startles you when she yelps
Fauna tells you she was just squeebing and says you can keep going
Fauna telling you how happy you're making her right now
Fauna caressing you as you go even faster
Fauna wrapping her legs around your head, begging you to keep going
Fauna rocking back and forth in her bed
Fauna moaning as weird sap gushes out of the hole and onto your face
Fauna lifts you up, wipes you off, and gives you a kiss on a forehead
Fauna holds you close to her chest as she dozes off to sleep
Fauna whispering that you're her favorite sapling as she nuzzles her face against yours

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Are The Saplings OK?

It has been 7 days and 20 hours since we last saw Fauna. Food, supplies, and morale is decreasing by the minute. Feeling our despair, she sent out a tweet reminding us that she would be back soon, but it wasn't enough. Hardly a squeeb or an uuu can be heard in the FauForest. Things are not okay. The stems on our heads can no longer photosynthesize as the bleakness of our situation combined with the apex of darkness in the Winter Solstice means that death is approaching. Water is hard to come across as most of it freezes before it touches the ground. Milk isn't an option while she's gone. Some saplings are starting to pass away, some out of boredom, others out of despair, and a few even starving to death. As Thomas Paine once said in his work The Crisis, "These are the times that try men's souls." It's only a matter of time before a micro-pandemic of smallpox sweeps across the forest and kills us all.

Some saplings, driven to the brink of madness, have begun doing her favorite things in an effort to appease her and bring her back to us, as if she were a God. Her role as Keeper of Nature has continued for four billion years at this point in time, and yet the bleakness of our circumstances makes me think she may have permanently left the job and left us on our own. These saplings, desperately clinging to the idea that she still bears the crown of Mother Nature, have begun playing Getting Over It, drinking tea, or even attempting to enjoy Fauna's vegan lifestyle. Some have even searched her private belongings for her clothes, and dress like her to cope with her absence. As if things couldn't get any worse, some saplings have elected to perform sacrifices in Her name; these gruesome rituals take place at the top of the highest tree in the forest, the victims squeebing out as they are killed, under a hopeless notion that Fauna will her the deafening cries of a dying sapling. It's only a matter of time before the sacrifices become a constant practice, and cannibalism may very well be the only way for any sapling to survive. The elder, baby, and disabled saplings randomly disappear at night without a trace. Rumors have it that they are murdered to cull the population so that our food rations last longer. When.. or if.. Fauna comes back, the sight of mass graves and our sacrifice altar will bring her fury to a level that hasn't been seen since the Dinosaurs died out. May she have mercy on our souls.

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Daily Sapling Care

We’re actually all dead. Every new sapling dies as a human during their first Fauna break. Then Fauna takes our dead bodies, buries them and then plants a seed over our corpses. After her break (harvesting the bodies) is over she starts streaming again. Her voice is like water to the dormant saplings and they start to sprout and grow.

This is why they shrivel up whenever Fauna goes on break (grave robbing). They need to be watered daily or else they won’t grow properly! If you know or own a sapling, make sure they have the time to get their daily watering! On days that Fauna isn’t streaming, it’s best to supplement with old ASMR. It won’t be as invigorating as new streams but it’s better than nothing.

Although one thing I do recommend is not overdosing your sapling on the ASMR. Only have them listen to one or two a day. Any more of that and it could cause the opposite effect. Instead of having their Fauna fix they could instead go into a state of missing Fauna too much! In this state they become incredibly suicidal. They can’t actually kill themselves since they don’t have any hands for weapons and they’re potted so they can’t go anywhere dangerous.. but you should still care about your sapling’s mental state regardless!

If you have any other questions about how to take care of your sapling please ask! I’ve studied their behavior in depth so feel free to ask about any problems concerning your sapling!

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