A mother's worries

Honeythief

“Hero Student is mauled by a Villain”, the news already spread like wildfire, fueled further by the fact the one hurt is her daughter, Orochi, an Atsushi. No one could have predicted this event, not even as a stray thought. This is why tonight she is here, in the waiting room of a hospital, with a boy who is a friend of Orochi, by what the medics said.

How could a Villain dare to rampage so near to Shinketsu? How did an S-Rank threat end up there? It shouldn’t be possible. Even if she avoided all patrols, someone like Feral is easily recognizable. Civilians would be able to tell who she is.

Yet no one was able to do anything. Even with the intervention of Stoneman, he could only slow down the villain and in the end was brutalized, almost killed if not for the quick thinking of her daughter. The news branded Orochi, her sweetheart, as a paragon of responsibility, following protocol and doing what should be done. Calling in authorities, running away from a villain, and only fighting when she had no option left.

Even with all this praise, the bitter taste left by Feral’s actions wouldn’t go away. No. She was a hero before, like her husband. Atsushi Nabiki, the retired hero Shenlong, sees the actions her daughter took were the most rational given the circumstances— she would’ve done the same in her shoes. Yet as a mother, no amount of reasoning and praise could shake the trepidation in her heart. No mother should want her children to get hurt, much less mauled by a degenerate.

No amount of praise or how “heroic” her daughter was is going to change this feeling, the feeling of failure as a parent. There was no way to know that would happen, this is true yet the fact it is true doesn’t matter even a little. It is irrational to think this way, it won’t bring anything good, yet she should’ve done more. She could have held Orochi, forced a family event, not allowed her to go to the arcade this time.

However, the feelings of being a hindrance to her daughter’s life, driving a wedge between them, halted any thoughts of stopping Orochi. After so many problems born of the desire to protect her daughter, stopping Orochi from getting hurt, had already done too much damage.

From the moment of her birth, Orochi already caused problems. The pain of birth of Kyoko and Akane combined couldn’t get close to Orochi’s, a six kilo baby with three tails almost as thick as her baby arms, the most painful moments of her life.

A ferocious spirit, always getting in trouble with her older sister and third cousin, Yuusei. Akane seemed to pay no mind, encouraging her little sister’s antics, while Yuusei was simply annoyed. Then her third daughter came into the world. Foolish as it was back then, she feared her middle daughter would hurt Kyoko without realizing,

Against expectations, Orochi was gentle, responsible, trying to help as much as Akane. Helping her get around the house, in her own little way, bringing diapers and the nursing bottle, always mesmerized and wide eyed by her little sister. A surprise when a four year old child had such protective thoughts about her mother and young sister, a testament that children do have awareness of their surroundings, even when little.

For that matter, she thought no one would ever be able to hurt Orochi physically, wounds simply closing and regenerating at alarming speeds. When the news broke about the poison and venom, a newfound worry rooted itself in Nabiki’s heart, contrary to what is expected of quirks, her poison didn’t come matured, like her regeneration and hydra heads. It grew stronger and more toxic as she grew, reaching a melting point when she bit Yuusei, leaving him paralyzed for a couple of minutes, without even realizing what she did. Even a family as rich as the Atsushi had problems with being mutants, at least their branch of the family. Her daughter being both poisonous and venomous would come with all kinds of problems to her.

While “no one would be able to hurt” Orochi in a physical manner, children are fragile, their emotions volatile. Nothing would stop rivals and mean spirited people from hurting her baby’s feelings, shunning her and forcing the spark of emotion to be lost.

For a child so energetic and passionate like Orochi to lost that spark, to have her emotions hurt and be shunned by her equals, either by fear or spite towards mutants, or worse, by orders of their parents to hurt the Atsushi through Orochi, made Nabiki’s heart feel overwhelming fear.

She should've handled it better. Not to underestimate Orochi’s stubbornness and determination, and to have faith in her daughter. In her paranoia, she tried to make her daughter the example of a japanese maiden, yamato nadeshiko. Someone with so much grace and politeness that one would be able to see flaws in her, hold her emotions in check to not hurt someone or cause a scene due to her poison. In the paper it was all perfect. Her daughter was a responsible little girl, a sweet little girl despite her brash moods.Orochi would understand, wouldn’t she?

With hindsight, she should’ve known how this plan would backfire… her daughter was always wilful, Orochi despised the limits and training to be a good maiden, the type someone wouldn’t ever be able to mock. At first, it was just small ]actions, Orochi preferring her father and sister over her childish actions. Then it escalated, Orochi would start to avoid her every chance she got, to not outright refusing to be with her at the worst of her years.

As a mother, Atsushi Nabiki could’ve handled the situation of her daughter a lot better. Unfounded worry and distrust in Orochi’s ability and self made her unable to see the damage. As years passed, Orochi little by little became a delinquent, going on dark paths, fighting other children in brawls, going as far as to join a gang and start smoking. At the time, she could feign ignorance towards Orochi’s delinquent tendencies, but the news of joining a gang was too much.

Someone with a wrathful quirk as Qirin…

Shouldn’t act so harshly and with so much outrage as she did. Lightning and static cracking as the ambient saturated itself with electricity. All in her mind was anger and disappointment towards her daughter. Although her dream of being a hero never vanished, she was going the wrong way about it. Protecting the weak through strength is one thing, but to act so harshly and forcing others to submission through strength, wasn’t right. Punching delinquents and punks who bullied the week to a pulp and threatening them with fangs and claws would never achieve her object.

She knew it, she wanted to say this to Orochi, to make her learn this lesson. But all she did was traumatize Orochi. Take her by force back to the Atsushi household. Storming her gang’s “hideout”, almost literally, scaring a bunch of kids and teenagers into submission with her quirk’s power, overcharged by her emotions at the time. She had said so many cruel words back then. If only she had a clearer mind to choose her words better… “You will never become a Hero! You already had done too much damage to your face! Joining a gang? YOU THINK that they will not see your history and see what you did? You barely passed this year! Notes on the red, school brawls and fights, not even the Atsushi name will carry your damn weight! YOU are destroying your dream!”

In no uncertain manner, she had a tantrum. Ever since, Orochi stopped being a rebel, and started to become a model student. One doesn’t need eyes to realize the reason, not because of a pure heel turn of her intentions and mood, but because of fear and shame. She shamed her daughter before the household, before her husband and sisters, before the maidens and butlers.

Orochi was ashamed. Orochi stopped ignoring her as a mother, yet she was even more distant. Damage was done, there was no way to reconcile that. Orochi ended up in Shiketsu, and started to chase her dream of being a hero.

Never before has someone hurt Orochi as badly as today. The closest thing was when Orochi played too close to a saw, and got her hand cut off. back then, her heart felt like jumping off her chest. However the feeling does not even compare to today. The feeling of failing as a mother, the fear for her daughter’s life… All of this combined in a creeping dread creeping all over her body. Her heart sank down, beating and pumping blood as fast as it could, with a knot in her throat stopping air from coming in regularly.

To say she is scared is to say an understatement. The temperature of her body is rising, even though the blood in her veins is cold. Yamamoto would be better here, yet he was called for an emergency meeting with the other Atsushi’s heads. Akane would be perfect but her oldest daughter fainted upon seeing the news, being taken care of by her office mates.

Would Orochi still hold a grudge against her? Would she be happy upon seeing her mother? All these damned doubts leech at her feelings, feeding her worries, however she has no way to deny the feelings of insecurity inside her.

As the only one fit to go to the hospital, she made haste, despite the feelings storming her mind. No fancy car, no helicopter, just her trustworthy Volkswagen beetle. Nabiki is no celebrity, she doesn’t want any journalist leeching off the suffering of her daughter, and hers…

She is just a worried mother, one among the hundreds of worried mothers all across the country. The best to handle the situation are not here right now, so she will need to make do. Taking heavy breaths, trying to relax her stiff body, to no avail, trying to focus on every door at once, waiting for any medic with good news to tell.

Soon a headache comes, an expected effect of trying to focus everywhere at once. A price willingly paid for the hopes of any good news regarding Orochi. Minutes pass, being like hours as silence breeds in the waiting room. The boy beside her, just a little younger than her daughter, tries his best to stay awake. As worried as she is, she still is a mother, with a glance the situation of the boy is clear as a crystal: He is tired, quirk, overuse or too much strain, either physical or mental, maybe both. His case being closer to someone sleepwalking than a fully awake person.

“Kid, go to your home, rest. I’m here, I will be here for her.” Friend or not, the maternal part of her couldn’t help but worry for the boy too, more so for the “connection” he probably has with Orochi. A second impatient for the hospital isn’t needed. The bitter taste of hypocrisy spread through Nabiki’s mouth.. How is she to judge the boy’s situation when herself isn’t much better?

With a stiff movement, he moves his head, making their eyes meet. “Orochi… held until she collapsed. I… don’t want to fail again.” Despite his tiredness, despite being barely awake, a flame burns in his eyes. The same kind of flame she saw in Yamamoto’s eyes all these years ago. The same flame in the eyes of Akane and Orochi. “Then… do not push yourself too much.” There is nothing else to be said. Anything more would be a disrespect towards his will.

How much time passed? Hard to deal when all in your heart is worries and fear. The boy is half awake and half asleep, resting his back against the wall. The turbulent feelings still spread like wildfire, halting any kind of solace and calm from surfacing. Her shoulders are stiff as cold sweat runs down. Being taken by blissful sleep would be a blessing she can’t take— even if it was on the table. Her heartbeats strong and unrelenting, making any action become a chore, making relaxation and sleeping impossible.

“Lady Atsushi Nabiki?” A medic breaks the silence’s long grasp on the room, making her muscles go stiffer than a board made of solid wood. “The patient awakened, she wants to see you.” As if shocked by a bolt of lightning, the boy awakens fully, almost jumping out of his seat, almost falling to the ground due to the suddenness of his own move, and his tired state. “Doctor. Is Orochi okay? Will she get better?” To help him, she gets up, holding his chest with one of her hands, stabilizing his position.

A forceful and bitter and sad smile contorts in her lips. Even in this state, he is able to get a burst of energy, her daughter always had a good eye for people… “She is stable, but will not be conscious for long. We understand your worries but only her mother can see her now. I’m sorry.”

”No use trying to argue for his case then.” Sad thoughts form themselves, she would shoulder this situation, for now. Is sad that a boy, with no direct connection in blood, moved faster than her. To someone, it would appear cold— no, she is being cold. The turbulent feelings in her heart and mind shouldn’t be used as an excuse for her slowness… the boy would be way better than her, in hindsight. Would Orochi even want to see her? When she had hurt her so much in the past too?

“It is okay, I’ll be there for her.” Trying her best to form a bright smile, and falling, Nabiki helps the boy get back to his seat. He is not happy with the situation, but won’t fight against it. “Doctor, guide the way.”

Nodding, they start their walk. It took less than a minute, yet the corridors of the hospital appear to be infinite. Extending endlessly as her head gets dizzy, her vision tripling. With each step feeling as if the weight of the world dropped on her shoulders. A knot forming itself on Nabiki’s chest, as her heartbeats get out of order.

She is scared. She shouldn’t be. Once she too was a hero, yet nothing could have prepared her for it. Getting hurt is part of being a hero, however, deep inside, she nurtured the wish of never seeing her children hurt, in a hospital. A naive notion that any mother would have. An instinct to see their children safe.

When their walk halts before a door, the Nabiki fortifies her heart, trying to gather as much strength to be there for Orochi. To be strong for her. “We did our best, but everything after this is new even for us. Take your time with your daughter, Lady Atsushi Nabiki.” With dry lips, a cold grasp took over her body, a type of cold she never felt before. The medic opens the door gently. Stepping in, she sees her daughter, Orochi.

Not her sweetheart full of energy, not the stubborn and strong young woman, but a severely wounded and maimed girl, while her arm regenerated, the wound on her belly still hasn’t totally healed.

Nabiki’s body doesn’t go stiff. As if all of the strength of her entire self is sapped, she falls to her knees, a loud buzz threatening to explode her eardrums, the medic voice being drowned by her emotions. Her mouth tasted like acid venom, her chest hurting, as if it would split open. Words threatening to escape her lips, yet no word but silent sobs escape them. “mo…ther”. A faint voice calls of her, the voice of her daughter.

Clear despite the buzzing, no amount of training could prepare her for it, the pain expanding through all of her being, the pain of seeing her child so hurt. “mom…” tears fall down her cheeks as her child calls, just a little stronger than before. With a ragged breath, she walks towards her, her vision being clouded now by both dizziness and tears, even then, she walks towards Orochi, her call guiding her.

Staggering towards the bed, she hits it, unreasonably fast despite her situation. “Sweat, mommy is here.” Even through the tears, she could still see her daughter, clear as a crystal. Her struggle to breath, her tail limb as if dead. Her eyes dull as a moonless night. “Mom, I’m scared…” Orochi’s voice is now a little louder than a whisper.

As if breaking a dam, tears start to fall down the Atsushi’s matriarch's cheeks, with no control over them anymore, falling down without rhyme or reason, towards the bed and sheats of her bed. “Mom is here, Orochi. Mom is here with you.” The words escaped her mouth, filled with hurt and sadness. “Mom… I’m scared. I don’t want to die.” Fear, the fear of her own mortality, spreading on her child’s face, as silent tears fall down her cheeks too, a fear a mother would never wish to see.

Seeing her daughter so defenseless, so weak, after all these years… she never wanted to see her children like this. She never wanted to ever see Orochi like this. Taking the hand of her daughter gently with her own, Nabii choked down her tears, to appear strong, to be strong for her daughter. “Sweety, you will survive. You will survive.”

A weak grip on her hands. Weeping, Orochi pleads for forgiveness— for mistakes not of her own.: “Mom… I promise, I will be better. Mom, please… forgive me. I… will be a better daughter.” Something deep inside Nabiki shattered. Her daughter doesn’t hate her. Her daughter is blaming herself for her mother’s mistakes. How… no, her daughter was the best, the way she is. “Orochi, you are the best daughter I could wish for. You are my daughter, no matter what. My little snapping turtle, you are perfect the way you are.”