Marriage Prospects

BEING THE PRIVATE PAPERS OF OCTAVIAN CAERULUS
AVERT THINE EYES LEST YE SEE SOMETHING YE WERE NOT SUPPOSED TO
AND RETURN THE BELOW DOCUMENT UNTO THE KEEPING OF THE NEAREST CAERULUS IMMEDIATELY
FOR A REWARD OF FIVE SEPTIMS

Men

The Caerulus family is of 100% pure Imperial stock, and would happily intermix with any of these sub-races.

FUTURE SON-IN-LAW

Magnus Septim II (Imperial, Colovia)

I don't care if he's a drooling nitwit, he has Septim blood and I'm foisting my most eligible daughter on him. Vittoria will find a way to visit as soon as possible.

MAN OF THE HOUR

Grenel the Fat (Nord, Heartland)

Seems well-positioned and well-resourced. If it were up to me, I'd have preferred an Imperial arse on the Ruby Throne, but he's assimilated well enough. He'll do. Now I just need to find a daughter who's sturdy enough to not get crushed by his weight in bed, and fertile enough to bear his large sons. Julitta should do the trick. She shares his appetite, anyway.

BRAINY GIRL

Isaelene Nesis V (Breton, Heartland)

The Inventors' Guild will want to have a word with her. And I have a great deal of capital to invest in her designs. Together we will dominate this new age of technology! Now I just need a son who's willing to look past her disfigurement, because she's surely not wearing that face covering for nothing. Antonius will suffice. The boy's a bleeding heart, and is no stranger to ugliness, having spent dozens of hours with the Inventors' Guild, too. Yes, yes, very appropriate.

REDGUARDS WHOM I DON'T HAVE MUCH OF AN OPINION ON

Endehm of Khefrem (Redguard, Khefrem)

A pirate and a ne'er-do-well - but at least he's human. And an excellent public speaker. He'd do well as a propagandist if he weren't so power-hungry. Rena runs with my hired pirates and knows their language; she'll set her cap at him should it become convenient.

Nishtar of Khefrem (Redguard, Khefrem)

What a lethal woman. And an opportunist, too! I know a kindred spirit when I see one. Why, if Lucretia weren't my wife… but such is life. Lucky Viro shall court her. It's about time he settled down, anyway.

YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT A HIGH-RANKING SOLDIER WHO'S BEEN SINGLE FOR DECADES

Captain Commander Farvad Torn (Redguard, Khefrem)

A decent general - hopefully he manages to ride herd on his Redguard brethren. A smidge of imperial discipline would do wonders for them. Yes, I can work with him, especially since I'm not angling for the throne. As for a match… I'm reminded of a childhood rhyme.
This nigga lookin' ZESTY, this nigga lookin' MOIST, he's got moonsugar in his tank, he's light on his feet…
But I digress. For some reason I'm not sure if he'd be interested in any of my daughters, but sure, why not, let's try Lauran. Not a direct descendant this time, but a niece, and quite the tomboy at that. Why, sometimes I even mistake her for a man! She'll do nicely.

ISOLATIONIST

Ysmir The Giant (Nord, Skyrim)

Ooh, I hate to abandon a daughter of mine to the north, but it seems a good idea to get on the good side of this rising power, even if we have precious little in common. Diana should suffice; she's a big one, and even sturdier than Julitta. I was even lining her up for Grenel until this Nord showed up. Seems largeness is in the blood.

ROMANTIC

Goose Neck Silver (Nord, Anequina)

A young and talented boy who'd do anything for love? How familiar. I was once such a man in my more carefree days, although I contented myself with the women of Haarstinn and rarely looked further afield. Still, to each his own. Probably won't accept a betrothal owing to none of my granddaughters being Khajiit, but I can at least toss Herminia at him. If you tilt your head and squint she does look a bit like a cat, with that quiet demeanour and those large, empty eyes.

NEARLY SALIVATING AT ALL THAT MAGICAL TALENT

Vivie Herrvan (Breton, Reach)

Talented magically, okay, we can work with that. Fairly excellent infusion of blood into the Caerulus line, her children should have some modicum of talent. Linus should do, he's nowhere near as talented as her but can hold his own in theoretical discussions and is brave on top of it.

REACHMAN

Briarheart (Nord, Skyrim)

Seems powerful enough, though his choice of friends leaves something to be desired. We aren't Nords, so we're not in any danger, but something tells me he might only be willing to wed a fellow Reachwoman. Whatever. Syloria should suffice.

NECROMANCER

Cassynder Mero (Imperial, Colovia)

Has raw power in spades. Sanity, less so. He'll need a competent wife to take him well in hand if he wins. Preferably someone who knows how to play dead during sex; I've heard stories about necromancers and their proclivities. Tacita, I'm sure, will grow into her role.

HAPPILY MARRIED, DAMN IT

Sareem Swiftblade (Redguard, Khefrem)

Oh. He already has a wife. Doesn't mean I can't peel them apart, but I'm not going to try too hard to do it either. Livia, that black sheep, will handle it - if I can get her to listen to me for once, that is.

CRIMINAL

Captain Vanillius Philidus (Imperial, Heartland)

Hardly an upstanding citizen; he consorts with criminals and was rejected even by the madman squatting in the capital. Men such as he are good for spreading terror, and possessed of a certain low cunning; but not much else. Niece Galla will do, but only if he triumphs, which is uncertain and unlikely.

WHO?

Talos (Nord, Skyrim)

Hm? Oh, I suppose he counts too. Nari will do.

MER

Starting to stray into dangerous territory here. At least for the men among them, their kids will come out looking human. Somewhat.

BOTTOMLESS WELL OF INFORMATION

Lilinah of Morrowind (Dunmer, Morrowind)

Men of commerce such as I thrive on having access to the latest and most accurate information. In this regard, this Lilinah has the potential to prove useful. But what's this - the Morag Tong? Yeah, I'm not risking a grandson on her. Grandnephew Marinus will position himself as a suitor if she ever demonstrates any interest in Imperial men.

IF HE TAKES POWER WE'RE FUCKED

Ruga the Doom (Orsimer, Skyrim)

Something makes me think this chap doesn't think very highly of Cyrodiil. Or of civilization in general. He might not even wed a human woman for fear that the children emerge without tusks. Still, as the Caerulus patriarch, I must plan for every eventuality. Vesta will do.

SMART CHAP

Atrael Elsinore (Altmer, Summurset)

A fellow observer! And a skilled mage, too. If I could secure his assistance in further enriching the family's lands, it would be quite the coup for Haarstinn. Niece Luciana helped with that project, and has ample expertise in such woolly matters. She should be well able to handle him. Especially if he's an ass man.

SEEMS PLEASANT ENOUGH

Euryale, Water Lily Princess (Bosmer, Valenwood)

Cooperative and pleasant. Still a Bosmer, though. Berich will do as he is told.

BEASTS

Interbreeding is unlikely with creatures such as this, but damn it, I'm going to try anyway. The Third Era is over, and the Fourth Era is upon us. But I'm only going to be selling off my grandnephews and grandnieces this time.

STANDARD WARLORD

Dance-With-Rain (Argonian, Argonia)

Seems reasonable, especially in comparison to his weirdly quiet countryman. Aia should serve as a suitable liaison between Nibenay and the Ruby Throne if his scaly arse ends up sitting on it.

I HAVE MANY ARGONIAN FRIENDS

General Caligate (Argonian, Colovia)

Look, it's not that I'm prejudiced or anything. I know lots of good Argonians. I've seen, what, fourteen, fifteen Argonians in my lifetime? And most of them were alright. I suppose. Anyway, because he seems to be culturally Imperial and well-versed in warfare, I'm going to do him a favor and foist one of my most attractive grandnieces on him. Charming Lepida will visit his camp if practicable.

INVADER

The Cobra King (Tsaesci, Heartland)

What sort of Caerulus would I be if I didn't have a contingency plan for this chap? I'll have my men take potshots at any non-Argonian snake-man that strays in our general direction, but if - if - he ends up winning, which I hope doesn't happen, Iscaria shall have to close her eyes and think of Haarstinn. But if he doesn't put himself in a position to get a bride foisted upon him, I'm certainly not going to offer.

I NEED TO STOP THINKING ABOUT SCRATCHING HIM BEHIND THE EARS

Al-Rahj (Khajiit, Anequina)

As long as he stays on his side of the Niben, I think we should be able to work together. Fortunately he's not huge, but he is rather petite, so I've had to call on my shortest grandniece, Rosentia. She helps with tax collection; she should be able to help him.

WHY DO I FEEL MORE NERVOUS ABOUT THIS CHAP THAN THE TSAESCI

An-Xleel (Argonian, Argonia)

I'm not even sure if he knows what a wife is, but whatever. I wish Salonia the best of luck if he somehow comes out on top.

COMPETENT ADMINISTRATOR

Kasha Shadowtail (Argonian, Heartland)

I didn't know the Empire had so many loyal Argonians. Could be helpful. Luther will take point, but I'm not holding out hope either way.

BIRD

Anumaril (Ayleid, High Rock)

Another supremacist. Er, Flavia likes birds, so I'll earmark her for it - I mean, him.

HOLY SHIT A DRAGON

Ancalaga (Tsaesci, Anequina)

I need a drink. No contingency plan could possibly work for something like this, but I'll give it a try. Roderic's never been the most useful to the family, and he's also never really grown out of his obsession with dragons, so he'll have to do.