even so, i keep wishing you would love me so !

hi, im calvin. also called wylan and saint, i suppose

more names can be found here. i use he/she pronouns. in the context of, he/him strictly or switch constantly between he & she, because nothing can be simple, of course. i consider myself to be a cistrans male, as well as bicurious/heteroflexible aroace. i love my qpp, a lot. kankri nonsharing yumeshipper. doubles i will can you. hes been my kismesis since 03/24/19, i hate him. dave strider wylan hendriks spencer reid irl. (well, actually, im a fictive of dave strider, vriska serket, & calvin gabriel...). irl cat & crow "boy".

i have no dni, really. but i block easily. i often switch between being avoidant and being super clingy, sometimes swapping based on the hour alone. i do my best! no empathy or remorse... usually ( on the remorse side. my lack of empathy is, unfortunately, permanent! sympathy can be drawn out by them, i love my bffs ). also, i dont really have a scale of right vs wrong, i tend to do things without thinking. sorry!

• "nonchalant" guy with a big ego that is 100% real!!!, i swear. i do some stupid things in conflict. i can be quite annoying to be around cuz of a multitiude of reasons. iis that spelt right? whatever!. dont involve me in drama, including if i start it, i really dont care!. optimistically charged pessimist

if it isnt clear, i dislike most people except my qpp. but i guess some others are enjoyable. namely, brandon, my brothers regulus & mio, azure, lily, castiel sometimes, mai, austin, james, jesse, & evan. ₍ᐢ·͈༝·͈ᐢ₎ they are my friends. who i love, truly. despite what i say !

i am very disordered and like to keep most of my issues private with execeptions of friends! ask me if you thhink i have a disorder or traits, i can confirm or deny, based on things professionals have told me, or diagnosed me with. given that im a minor, im not diagnosed with every disorder that likely applies to me, but i dont claim to exhibit traits of anything that im not professionally recognized or diagnosed with. plural.

• i like a lot of stuff, mostly homestuck, voidbound, six of crows, the hunger games, criminal minds, and a LOT more. see more of my interests right here, pretty please!. i dont wanna type more.

i am physically sickly and struggle with several illnesses. many things are difficult for me! on a lighter note, i fall under 3 dere types! i like my favorite characters a lot. like dave strider, wylan van eck/hendriks, deymin deuxay, peeta mellark, spencer reid, derek morgan, and others 💚💚💚 <- biggest fan of green (; ꒪ö꒪) do not fear if i react to your message with a green heart, i just love it. i probably found you funny. if it isnt clear, i love movie tropes.... :3

the type of transman that wants to be as not-trans as possible, according to peyton... aha....

TONETAGS OR THEY/THEM = I KILL MYSELF.

hi this is another update my favorite friends ever are craig and brandon and regulus . lov u all tho .