| Genoo |
Big horsegirl with horse personality traits. Adequate prose. |
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Chub Catbox |
| whatever-chan (1/2) |
"Think of her as a human female with wolf-like features like wolf ears, tail and fangs." I fucking despise it when people write shit like this. Just describe what you're describing. Otherwise, generic hard-working tomboy. Cannot see substance in it. Dunno why it even has example chats, the writing is just normal. |
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Catbox |
| (2/2) |
"with a very bad case of insomnia" and is literally sleeping on the greeting. There may be some depth to this, and I can notice the themes with dreams and sleep, but I cannot see where you were actually going with this. |
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Catbox |
| illuminaryidiot (1/2) |
I like the style and the aesthetic. I despise the writing, but that's taste. I cannot find the substance beyond "cthulhu spooky fishy girl", but it may be dumbassery on my part. |
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Chub Catbox |
| (2/2) |
"Up, up, up in the mountains of some region with no name (plot convenience, alright?)" I WILL THROTTLE YOU TO DEATH HOLY FUCKING SHIT FUCK YOU PEOPLE "Her attire consists of blue dresses that look strangely similar to a certain real world nation that may or may not be known as China. Which... totally doesn't exist in this world. Promise!" This has actually killed my motivation to keep reading, dropped. |
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Catbox |
| Clara-chan |
I like the prose. Kinda Mary Sue-y. An interesting part of the description is that she's someone who was supposed to be low on the line of succession, but is now apparently at the top, and I believe that could be a good source of character flaws. |
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Chub AltArt NoLorebook NoLBAltArt |
| Zennou |
No comment. |
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Chub Catbox |
| Horcocks |
I do like it. Love Sisyphean endeavors. Some English mistakes, for example, the first lore paragraph should be simple past. 's cool tho |
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Chub |
| Dould |
Immediately stilted writing. "Such is the laugh of an ojou-sama, of which {{char}} Valmere is a sterling example." should read something like "Valmere being a sterling example" or "and Valmere stands as a sterling example". You forgot to give her a personality other than being a villainess. |
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Chub Catbox |
| pixi |
Riddled with grammar mistakes, some very jarring. "Iohmi's only human contact is {{user}}, there is no other humans left in Japan." I like her quirks, love goofy shit like "She often tries to puzzle together how people died by looking at their skeletons." I'm honestly kind of a sucker for her personality type and the backstory in general. I'm gonna have to dock points for organization, for some reason you mention that she can drive in the personality section and that she understands how wartime tech works in the info section, and I genuinely do not understand the thought process behind this segmentation. |
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Chub |
| Nitrogen |
Stilted writing. "Her whole body is ONLY consisting of a humanoid bust with a cleavage without arms nor lower body." "Ultimately, she was to be able to kill even the most reluctant ones if necessary." "As {{user}} uses the pc/and the AI". I like the ideas in this, but the execution is wack. |
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Chub |
| Anonymous |
GOOD prose. Small mistake with "But that's not the least of your problems." "He gives you the kind of smile that hides a million secrets and a million more behind those cold blue eyes" is a bit awkward, you might want to go full chuuni and write "and a million more in the gaps between each teeth" or whatever, you do you. I could nitpick more but I'm good, luv the card, luv the creepypasta. |
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Chub Catbox |
| SionAnon |
I like the funnybot but it is a simple funnybot. |
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Chub Catbox |
| Celebrimbor |
"When she became a vampire she was ecstatic, not fully understanding what it was." what WHAT was? "at the age of 23 she was bitten by a vampire" "she also looks forever 22 years old." anon I'm sorry but you need to put more brain cells into this. |
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Chub Catbox |
| Planewalker |
"Just as with his body, his manhood is also slim and long." Okay, I laughed. This actually makes me think of Percy Jackson more than anything eldritch. |
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Chub Catbox |
| Lunarcy |
I like it quite a bit, neat description. If I had to give a solid tip, try to use verbs more. "Now purple with the energy from the Crystal" could be "Now colored purple by the Crystal's energy." "Friends and family were slaughtered by an errant attack from the gods in the war." kind of reminds me "I'M FIGHTING FOR ALL OF MY FRIENDS YOU GOT TO SEE FOR FIVE MINUTES AT THE BEGINNING OF THE ANIME", which may be an issue. The lorebook is cool too. |
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Chub |
| brincedelu |
Riddled with grammar mistakes, stilted English and formatting mistakes. "Half-way thru building the project it goal was changed to that of to see what would happen to a human stuck alone in space for a long period of time alone" The personality field reads "stoic and act almost robotic like" but the intro message and the examples read NOTHING like that. Did you forget it there or something? |
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Chub |
| momoura |
"and the scales are translucent, allowing the veins to be seen" extremely autistic on my part but I immediately though "what's the blood's color tho?". The writing is kinda reddit sometimes, like "Provisions were a necessity of life, of course, and {{char}} was one of those people who much preferred being alive.", but I do like it quite a bit overall. |
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Chub |
| CUMSLURPER |
Stilted writing at times, "despite being a robot, {{char}} is very attractive having a curvaceous body, she however is a flat chested variant, she has a very nice ass, {{char}} is unable to get pregnant." I like the descriptions of her body and the way she clicks and clacks when moving, so I'm sure the requester will be satisfied if this is their fetish. I'm also docking points for using C.E. instead of A.D. |
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Chub Catbox |
| Scriptanon |
Very nicely made but I'd have to play around more to give a conclusive opinion. |
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Chub Catbox |