Jannat's BEFORE YOU INTERACT full detail :)
Hello! To be blunt, I am never one or two things. I am put together by multiple labels, personalities, and behaviors — sort of like Frankenstein. I’m extremely capricious, indecisive, ambivalent, fickle, paradoxical, sporadic, and I think I got the point across… everything about me fluctuates throughout the day, most predominantly seen are my moods, personality, and my opinions on others (FRIENDS ARE NO EXCEPTION). If you can’t handle inconsistency and find it tiring, don’t attempt to start anything with me!
I try to refrain from using (reclaimable) slurs and self-harm jokes. Remarks like that will only slip depending if my mental health is worse than it already is. I have severe disorganized attachment and jealousy issues. I can be overly sexual and romantic — and I don’t ever mean it. I have a boyfriend! I don’t use tonetags but I will honestly clarify anything if needed and use tonetags if asked. I struggle with tone myself so I’m not sure what will need tags and whatnot. I overthink a lot and I never directly ask for reassurance. But if I start acting off, that’s exactly what I need :)
I typically match energy and I don’t text people I’m not close with. I struggle with holding convos and do best in groupchats. I also do best with people who feel authentic from the start! I also need a foundation to maintain friendships. Foundation such as shared interests, games, and humor. No fun is no connection which means no point. I unconsciously act polar the closer I get with someone because I live by opposites attract — and it keeps the friendship, dynamic, and conversations interesting.
Friends with me for 1 second = I own you. All of my friends know that I'm crazy possessive. I may feel entitled to things but I would probably not push after being told no and why.
I don’t feel sympathy and I only have cognitive empathy. I care about people in the sense of what I get in return or sometimes — I actually care about them! Most times, it's not the latter. And I don’t say this to sound “edgy” but it is something I genuinely struggle with. I can act friendly and all but if there’s nothing in it for me, I genuinely do not care about your feelings even if we’ve been friends for years.
But many people deal with me and love me for all my parts. As insufferable as I seem, all of these aren’t the case in most of my friendships. I care about the fun, talking, and laughing that comes with it. Serious talks too – believe me! I am messy and ruthless but also bubbly and affectionate if you do it right. I’m honest every second of the day!