Within Me

A Team Crusader Story

Chapter 1: Beau

Silence, emptiness, white noise, these are normally the sounds of a deep, dreamless sleep. A sensation that Beau had experienced time and time again as he went to bed. Though, it felt like for the first time, this emptiness was more peaceful than depressing. A calming sensation washed over his body as the light of the morning sun pried his eyelids open. There was an odd feeling though, one that made him think that this normally wasn’t how he woke up.

He recollects a small hazy memory of an abrasive sound lurching him awake, forcing him to pull himself from the silence in his head, to do…
That’s where the thoughts trail off, as he begins to take in his surroundings. Although, it’s all unfamiliar to him. The first thing that’s wrong is that he expected to be indoors, not… outside. A small panic starts to brew inside him, his mind racing to find a conclusion to where he was at. Was he kidnapped? Was he taken somewhere and left for dead?

He tries to think back to where he was supposed to be. He was… inside, and he was in bed, it was late at night… But that’s where the memories end.

The panic balloons in his mind. He can’t remember anything else but that. What color was his bed? What color were his walls? What was that sound that woke him up during the day?

He takes short, sharp breaths of air, he can feel his heart racing in his chest as his eyes focus on his surroundings. Finally, everything comes into clear view.

He’s in the middle of a forest, the grass around him is short, yet doesn’t look as if it’s been tended too. He’s in a clearing of trees, the sunlight poking through from its position in the early morning, the rays casting shadows through the lush foliage.

He’s lost. That much is certain, if he wants to find answers, he’s going to have to move. His whole body is numb, the adrenaline rushing through his body being the only thing keeping him awake at the moment. He knows that he needs to move, to find someone, to get answers to where he is. To make it home.

He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, he’s not in any danger, he has to take this one step at a time.

He can feel himself lifting his body off the ground, he’s in a crawling position. Now he just has to stand up.

.
.
.
.

He can’t.

He opens his eyes. He can’t stand up, it’s like something is keeping him stuck to the ground on all fours. He looks down, trying to find the source of his-
These aren’t his hands, they’re not hands at all.

Panic begins to set in again, his heart racing in his chest as he stares at the two lavender colored paws planted firmly on the ground where his hands should be. He’s not human anymore. Hell, he doesn’t know what he is. Although, these paws, their color, it’s familiar to him… His mind registers it as some kind of animal, but exactly what is hidden within the fog of his memory.

Maybe someone can tell him. He looks around more at what he can see of himself, he’s stuck on all fours, that’s a give in. He has a tail, like a… what’re they called again? Even something as simple as that is a haze.

“Alright.” His voice echoes in his head, the familiar baritone sound he knew just fine.

“Let’s focus on what you do remember.”

He starts to go through his mind like a checklist.

“I’m Beau. I remember that.”

“I’m- I was, human. How did I…”

His mind trails off, is that all he really remembers?

“Okay… let’s just find someone. They’ll know what to- wait, is there anyone who’d understand me?”

He pauses from his inner monologue to test out his theory, opening his mouth to speak for the first time since he woke up. His voice cracks, catching him by surprise, he can feel the fur on his neck stand up on end, his ears pinning back in embarrassment, even though no one is there to spectate his predicament, all these new sensations over his body are confusing, but they feel oddly natural.

“H…hello?” He says, uttering a word with the same voice he heard in his head. That part of him is still the same.

He takes a sigh of relief, the first thing about this whole situation that’s normal to him. It’s a small comfort, but it’s enough for him. He looks through the trees, finding a direction that looks promising to head towards. He raises his front paw, taking his first step.

As he moves forward, he feels his weight shift, and promptly lands snout first into the grass.

Pulling his face up from the ground, he spits chunks of the earth, before attempting to walk once more.

He lifts his left front paw, then his right back paw, he can feel his body moving forward, catching himself, and then bringing his other two paws forward. Though he falls again, landing on his side.

“This is ridiculous.” He says out loud, testing his voice again to make sure that the first time wasn’t a fluke.

Not giving up just yet, he rolls himself upright before standing up once more. That part’s easy, he’s got this… right? He starts taking another step, front left, back right, front right, back left, front left, back right, front right, back left.

He waddles through the forest for a few steps, murmuring his walking chant to himself until it begins to feel natural for him to walk. Now he’s walking normally, at least, normally for whatever he’s become. He looks up from his paws and begins to take in the world for real this time.

The air is clean, crisp, it doesn’t feel real to him, whatever scents he remembered weren’t as vibrant as the ones he was taking in now. Nor was how green everything was. It feels like the more he continues, the more fragments of his memory before all this begin to re-emerge. Flashes of another world familiar to him appear in his mind as he walks. The sky is a dark, dismal gray. The vegetation is a faded green, with leafless trees, a bitter chill, and large stone pathways cover where the faded grass would be. Pulling himself away from his thoughts, he looks to his right, spotting a small pond…
And a path.

His ears perk up in both curiosity and excitement as he quickly trots his way over to the pond. Finally, something that looks like civilization. But the water would be a good place to drink as well, maybe some of his haziness is due to him being dehydrated? It’s a silly thought, but in his current situation, he’s willing to try anything to help clear his head.

He walks up to the waterline, the pond is crystal clear, enough to where he can see the bottom, this reminds him of a pond he remembered from his previous world, the water a inky black, and filled with… objects he didn’t quite understand. Still, he stared in awe at the pristine pool of water in front of him, until he looked down to see his reflection.

Finally, he gets a good look at his face. And as if he had dunked his head into the water himself, a realization overtook him.

He knows what he is now.

The lavender fur like his paws, the dark purple eyes, white iris, the large ears, the cheek fluff, and the red gem on his forehead. The only thing separating him from any others like him, is the tuft of fur in between his ears, it partially covers his gem, the style a noticeable remnant of his former human self.

“E... Espeon.” The only words he manages to utter from his mouth as he stares at his reflection.

That can’t be right though… that’s a Pokemon. Pokemon, they’re not real. They’re nothing more than just a video game. This… this has to be a dream. He dunks his head into the water, maybe that’ll wake him up.

He holds his head under water, it’s cold, stinging him as the water seeps through his fur. He holds his breath, five seconds, twenty seconds, twenty-five seconds. He can feel his lungs starting to give out, he can’t hold his breath any longer.

He pulls his head out of the water, gasping for air. His claws dig into the grass as he holds himself over the water, staring at the rippling reflection of the espeon in the water.

He takes breath after breath, his pupils dilated, only small white specks in a sea of purple.

His thoughts race through his head. This can’t be a dream, he almost drowned himself and that didn’t wake him up. He looks down again at his paws, holding one up to his face, could he bite himself to wake up from this…

His voice echoes in his head again.

“You’re overreacting, this isn’t a nightmare, this doesn’t feel wrong.”

He knocks the thoughts from his head, by biting into his arm.

The sharp sting of his fangs against his flesh aches, causing him to recoil in pain at the feeling. That didn’t wake him up either. He looks at himself in the reflection again.

The ripples cease as the last few drops of water drip from his face, he stares at the reflection, gazing into the purple of his eyes. He tries to remember what he used to look like, but he’s unable to. A hazy figure in his mind, with no discernable features he could call his own. The espeon in the pond. It doesn’t scare him, part of him sees it as unsettling, another part sees it as himself.

The taste of his own blood in his mouth is enough to pull him from his narcissistic trance, even that doesn’t taste how he remembered it to be. Even so, it’s unpleasant.

He leans forward into the water again, pulling the water into his mouth using his tongue to wash the taste out. The water itself is refreshing, removing the odd taste of pokemon blood from his palette. He pulls himself up from the water, pausing for a moment. The water was good… better than water he used to have. Another memory unhazing itself in his mind.

The old water was in a clear container of some kind. Comparing it to this, it was artificial, yet comparing it to how the inky black pond from his memory, he knew that’s how everyone drank it.

He realizes his thirst isn’t quenched just yet and cranes his head down once more to get another drink, free of blood. As he drinks, everything seems calm. This is okay, he can handle this. Though he’s pulled from his daydream when a voice calls out from behind him.

“Hello there!”

Beau shrieks like a small child jumping away from the pond, his ears immediately flattened, his tail retreating between his legs.

“Ahh!”

As he spins around, he comes face to face with another creature. It’s wide smile and beady eyes are the first thing Beau’s eyes are drawn to, The creature stand on the ground in front of him wearing some kind of satchel over it’s shoulder, the creature itself is pink, a small orb like cat creature, two massive propellor like leaves stick out of its head.

Beau knows what this thing is. It’s a Hoppip, another Pokémon.

His mind begins to clear as another bout of panic sets in on him, though he’s pulled out of it by the cheery, feminine voice of the Pokémon.

“Whoa, sorry, didn’t mean to scare you!” The Hoppip says, with a small laugh.

“Not every day you see someone alone in the forest.”

Beau pauses for a bit, trying to pick his next words carefully, he could explain his predicament to the Hoppip, she seems trusting. But he’s not trusting enough to let someone in on the fact that not only doesn’t he remember anything, but he was also a human before all this. He takes a deep breath and plays it cool.

“Yeah, sorry. I guess I got kind of lost.” Beau says, ending it with a nervous laugh.

“These woods are definitely a dangerous place without a friend.” The Hoppip says, as if scanning the woods for would be predators.

“You lose your team?”

Beau continues to play along.

“Yeah, I lost my team. Knowing them, they probably though I uh… went back to town.”

The Hoppip nods, Beau’s gamble paying off.

“In that case, I can help you get out of here!” A bright smile wider than the one they had before stretching their face.

“I was actually on my way back to town, gotta deliver some letters.” The Hoppip lightly taps their satchel, before looking to the sky.

“Wind’s just right today, should take me right to Treasure Town in no time!” The Hoppip pauses, looking at Beau.

“But I can also guide you there too, beat’s being lost in the forest, right?”

Beau nods.

“Yeah, please, show me the way out of here. I’m not sure where I’m going.”

The Hoppip starts walking their way in the opposite direction from where Beau was heading; down the path he had found. Beau follows behind them trying to watch how he walks, hoping the other Pokémon doesn’t notice something is a little off about him.

“This is the way out. Thankfully you didn’t walk too far into the forest, who knows where you could’ve ended up.”

Beau tries to hide his own embarrassment, realizing if the Hoppip hadn’t found him, he would’ve probably been lost for a lot longer.

“Yeah. Thanks.”

The Hoppip turns around their unceasing grin making Beau’s fur begin to stand on end.

“No problem! I’m here to help!”

Beau’s attention is brough to the right, he can see the clearing he woke up in nestled in the trees in the distance. Hoppip seems to catch him staring.

“Whatcha looking at?”

Beau snaps out of his trance and turns his attention to the Pokémon talking to him.

“Oh, that clearing. I was just there.”

Hoppip floats into the air to look through the tree line.

“Something special about it?”

Beau gut tells him this line of questioning shouldn’t continue, he changes the subject.

“I uh, never got your name.”

Hoppip looks to him, the smile fading into a look of confusion.

“Name?”

Beau’s ears pin behind his head, but he instinctively presses on.

“Yeah… a name? What do I call you? You’re helping me after all.”

Hoppip pauses, thinking for a second before nodding.

“Oh! You mean a Nickname! Everyone just calls me Hoppip!”

The smile returns to their face.

Beau takes another sigh of relief.

“Gotcha.”

“What about you?” The Hoppip asks, now floating backwards, facing him.

“Do you have a nickname?”

Beau pauses again, maybe this Hoppip could be trusted a little bit.

“I’m Beau.” He responds with a small morsel of confidence.

“Interesting.” The Hoppip replies, now turning back to pay attention to the path.

“Never heard that nickname before, did someone give it to you?”

“It’s always been my nickname.” Beau responds, watching his words carefully.

“That’s neat! Maybe one day I’ll get a neat little nickname like yours!” Hoppip performs a small spin in the air, as if to accentuate their excitement for receiving a moniker that’s not just their species name.

“Maybe.” Beau can’t help but smile, the other Pokémon’s excitement is contagious.

The two continue down the path, the tree line disappearing to show a open field, leading out to the horizon, where Beau can spot the open ocean. The wind brushes behind him, the warm sunlight warming his body as he sees the Hoppip drift off down the path towards the shoreline.

“Come on! I can’t slow down!” the Hoppip yells, its voice begins to trail off, now 20 feet away from Beau.

Beau picks up his pace, stumbling, before beginning the walking chant again in his mind, as he starts to speed up his walking pace, the chant quickens, each paw hitting the ground in sync with another. He’s getting the hang of moving faster, but the Hoppip is getting away.

“Run Beau!” the Hoppip shouts.

Beau listens, picking his pace up, he’s moving faster than he ever was before, the chant doesn’t match with how his feet are moving, front paws hitting the ground first, with his back kicking the rest of his body forward to restart the cycle. He decides to ditch the chant and attempt to run on instinct.

He picks the pace up, but the Hoppip continues to increase in speed, outrunning him.

Beau tries to run faster, breaking out into a full sprint for the first time. As he runs, he heads over a hill, and everything hits him in one moment.

He can see the fields carefully caress the ocean, the golden sand of the beaches hugs the waves as the grass of the field sits behind the sand, preferring to stay rooted in the dirt.

He follows the path in front of him with his eyes, it leads to what looks like a cliffside, buildings nestled within trees and spires of rock. As he begins to really appreciate the beauty of the scenery, he feels his paw slip, as his body buckles.

The world begins to spin, the sky replacing the ground and vice versa, over, and over, and over and over, until he stops at the bottom of the hill. His head is spinning more than his body just did.

As he stands up, shaking the dust and dirt from his coat, he hears the Hoppip, as their voice drifts off into the distance.

“Follow the path! I’ll meet you at Treasure town!”
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