Chapter 2: Surprise Reception/Touching Tale

The morning sun rises from the water's surface, and Pokémon underwater are splashing about early. A school of Wishiwashi swims near, curious of what sort of contraption moves past them. Flocks of Wingull and Pelipper flapped their wings overhead, as did a lone Mandibuzz. The occasional Mantine or Palafin surfaces to look above the surface. They would all see a small wooden ship, with room for six but only carrying two, sailing towards the emerging desert landscape in the distance.

Stumpy awakened with a wide yawn, and while he emerged from his damp sleeping bag, he shook some spores loose from his body and his petal crown, looked in the mirror, and saw in the reflection a Shroomish, skin of khaki, spots of British green, who felt much better than he did yesterday on his third day at sea. He stretched, puffed up, squatted down, hopped, rolled on the floor a few times…some simple morning stretching and exercise never hurt anyone. He walked to his door, stepped on the switch that unlatched it, and walked into the crewquarters alone.

He expected he would be up first this morning. Nidoqueen loved her beauty rest. And, if he could share a truthful opinion, Stumpy was alright with that. Unlike his superiors, he was never a stick in the mud or a hardened, grumpy little stump. Stumpy cared for his colleagues and the handful of Pokémon who worked under his division, in the same way he wished for others to care for him.

Of course, the occasional mishap in production would occur, or a missing ingredient here or there, but Stumpy wouldn't be too disciplinary over it. Besides, that was the job of his higher-ups, not him. He appreciated when his fellow workers arrived and worried when they didn't. Even Exploud, who he was terrified of after…"that" accident.

As Stumpy tried to navigate their ship, he could hear light tramplings underneath him. Nidoqueen woke up, and right on time, too! She let out a yawn as well and poked her head out from the crew quarters to see Stumpy manning the wheel as best he could. Just because he didn't have the means of steering a ship doesn't mean he couldn't try to make it work out in his favor.

"Uuuaahhhh~ mmm...Good morning, Stumpy!"

"Oh, 'ello there, Nidaquaen! Lookin' great this mornin', innit?"

"Heh, flatterer." Nidoqueen smiled down at Stumpy. "If I can say so, you look like a brand new Pokémon! You didn't dream about me last night, did you?"

"Matta o' fact, oi did! And it was a good 'un, loike! Felt loike a propa' luva'. An' 'onest, ya really opened me oyes up last noight. Thanks for tha', luv."

"A proper lover, eh? Well, I dreamed of you, too."

"Ohhh, now we tolkin' me laingwich! Soooo…wot wus it loike?"

"Hmmm…average."

"Ah?…av'rige? AV'RIGE? Me?"

"Yeah, and you had a blush on your face after you got done. It was really funny watching you mess up doing something so simple."

"Now 'old on there, luv, I am more than jus av'ri-"

"You were a horrible cook." Nidoqueen replied as she walked up to Stumpy.

"I coul please any...eh?...cook?"

"Mmm-hm! It was like watching the complete opposite of you with beer."

"I…Um…Damn, I din't expect tha', luv…Buuut yew moight be onta somthin. Guess oi need ta work on cookin' umelets and not 'ave 'em go up in flames."

Nidoqueen chuckled at the thought and watched the little Shroomish sit down in defeat, following his lead and sitting down herself, poking at him once with one of her toeclaws in a teasing way, something Stumpy would fear normally, but he was always happy with Nidoqueen. Even so, in other people's dreams, it seemed poor Stumpy came up short, and whether it's a pun or not is up to the imaginator. But dreams are still dreams in the end, and Stumpy let out some laughter, with Nidoqueen joining in on the joy Stumpy had over sharing last night's dreams. The two of them were starting to become a pair, it seemed.

Something else that was starting to become was the coastline in the horizon, and Nidoqueen pointed it out to Stumpy. He nodded his head and asked her to help him man the wheel. Nidoqueen didn't have to do much, either. Her brute strength belied her beauty, and she had much of both to spare.

"Well, Stumpy, it looks like the land's a ho, isn't it?"

"Ha! Shure is, luv! Let's get in position and call on some 'elpas!"

"Right!" Nidoqueen came over and held onto the wheel steady, while Stumpy yelled out to sea to call upon some help to park this ship into place.

"OOOOYYYY! Fenezen! Paulafen!"

Just like that, a chattering sound came up from the water, and from out of the water were a group of Palafin and Finizen emerging to the surface, staring up and looking for who called for their help. They quickly spotted the ship and then Stumpy himself.

Stumpy turned to Nidoqueen. "Oi was told 'ese Pokamun are gonna 'elp us set the ship in place. Keep a hold a th' wheel!"

They were about 150 yards from where they were to dock, and with skill and precision, the aquatic helpers eased the ship to its rest.

Stumpy called to the helpers once more, ready to push on the trigger that drops their anchors. "AENKERS DOOWWWNN!"

The Palafin and Finizen backed away to safety, and Nidoqueen got those words loud and clear, too. She and Stumpy lowered the anchors in unison so the ship wouldn't float off.

"CHEERS, LADS AN' LASSES. LI'LE ANDREW'S FOR THE LOT OF YOU WHO WANT A ROIGHT PROPA BEVVY!"

It was shocking how many of them stayed. Not a single one swam off of the nine who gave them a helping hand. Stumpy and Nidoqueen looked at each other in surprise. They opened the cargo bay and revealed their contents: 30 large crates of Little Andrew's, the finest mushroom beer in the whole wide world!

The dolphin Pokémon looked excited to have something special to drink, and once Nidoqueen unloaded the first crate and unboarded the pints of brew, she laid them out for them all to take, a pint for each of the lot. They seemed extremely happy for some reason, too. Stumpy wondered why.

"Fanks, you lovable lot. 'Ere you all go, on me word…an' me coin."

A Palafin swam forward, his fin out stretched. Stumpy nudged the fin with his petal crown as if he were trying to give a handshake. The Palafin smiled, beaming in the sunlight.

"Nooo…thank YOU, Little Andrew! Your Huge Mushroom beer is incredible! It was the talk of the town two months ago at Saloon, and we've been DYING to know when you or whoever else from Capim Town would come back with more!"

There it was again. Someone called him Andrew with no idea what it meant to him, but the news of just how popular his creation had completely floored Stumpy! This was no time to be annoyed or cheesed off. In fact, it was a time to be jubilant!

"Wuh!? But yeh, tha's me on th' laebel. Andrew's me true name…oi just...don't loike it when others coll me tha'. Fo' future saeke, please, coll me Stumpy, Paulafin."

"Will do, Stumpy! The word of your arrival specifically has been on everyone's tongue!"

"Wouldn't pin eh toll on meself, loike. Without me 'andmaedin Nidaquaen 'ere, oi wouldn't 'ave made it 'ere meself!" Nidoqueen made a slightly embarrassed noise, but didn't protest.

"Well said! Thank you as well, Nidoqueen! You too are a hero!"

Nidoqueen was silent, eyes wide and blushing like mad. "Y-You're welcome, Palafin."

"Heyyy, no need to feel so shy and humble. Puff out your chest, be proud of yourself!"

"Hehehe…m-maybe later, once we unload our crates."

"Be seeing your face on a mug again very soon, Stumpy!"

And like that, the dolphin Pokémon and his team swam away, each with a sealed pint, leaving under the water's surface.

"Roight honourable gent, innit? What do yew think, luv?"

"Oooo…what a dreamboat…"

Stumpy could see the hearts in her eyes, and Stumpy shook his head and sighed. After closing the ship's cargo door, the little Shroomish gave a step on top of his handmaiden's foot, trying to get her attention. Given his weight, or lack thereof, it would probably tickle her like a feather instead of hurt. "Oi! Earth to Nidaquaen. Cam on, let's go round up some 'elp with these crates, luv."

"Huh? Oh, r-right. Sorry about that, I was just…hey! Wait for me!" Nidoqueen chased after Stumpy as he walked off, but it didn't take long to catch up with him. The pair of business travelers took about 10 small flights of cliffside steps into town when they heard a voice from somewhere.

"Travelers from afar, welcome…to Sahra Town!"

"Hm? Wot was tha'?"

"Oh. Apologies, travelers. Please, look to your left. We are here."

Nidoqueen and Stumpy looked to their left…but no one was there. Just a bunch of rocks, and one of them had a strange crack and a glowing aura inside…

Suddenly, a ghost, swirling, a chaotic mix of violet and green and yellow, popped out of the rock!

"UWAAAH! N-N-N-NIDAQUAEN, WOT IS…!"

"Further apologies, I am afraid…Do not fret, we are but humble natives of Sahra Town. Our name is Spiritomb."

Something didn't make any sense in Nidoqueen's head. "...we? But there's only one of you from what we see, Spiritomb."

And to many, that indeed would be the case. Spiritomb's swirling eyes and sharp grin were constantly in a state of flux. Stumpy stayed close behind his handmaiden, cowering from what was a ghost-type's sudden appearance.

"Though we appear to be one singularity, our body is comprised of many souls… Little one, please do not be afraid of us. We are here to be your guide through our small village. Please, follow us."

Nidoqueen looked behind her and scooped a speechless, spooked Stumpy into her arms, following Spiritomb's stone as the collection of souls tied to a stone float and hop to each establishment.

"First, our favorite place. The largest bazaar on our whole continent. Kecleon and his brother Kecleon buy, sell, and trade goods here, even rare treats. Be warned: they are talented businessmen. Some within us wish we could be the same, yet others within us loathe their cunning.

"To the right is Claydol Bank. Claydol is…eccentric and silly…but we trust her with our goods and money more than anyone else. Further down this way, our hotels, chiseled from rock and stone.

"The tall house on the left…we are afraid to enter it ourselves. That is the entrance to one of our large watering holes. We…do not swim, you see. However, you are both welcome to its relaxing waves."

Stumpy felt lucky he could float on the water naturally. Spiritomb continued guiding them, as a pair of Maractus and a Cacnea passerby watched Stumpy closely in awe.

"You may be familiar with this small establishment, little one. This is where your concocted beverage began to gain fame. You see, this is our local pub."

"Luv me a good pub!" Stumpy said, still quivering in Nidoqueen's clutches.

"Indeed. We, too, enjoy this establishment. They are Sahra Town's best in the terms of entertainment and food. Some of us would call this place The Saloon, yet others of us call it الصالون."

Nidoqueen looked confused. "all-sa-what?"

"In our second language, it means 'The Saloon'."

"Oh."

"The native citizens outside our town speak this different language. One that we are proud to know. We will head inside ourselves, but you are welcome to join us in socializing with the patrons."

Nidoqueen nodded with a smile, and Stumpy, still shook from the worst scare he's had in the last month or so, nodded as well. The three opened the swinging double doors and found about 5 to 10 Pokémon inside. It was dimly lit, and the only Pokémon that appeared to be there were Ghost-types. Stumpy recognized the Haunters immediately, but the others were Pokémon he'd never seen before.

"The Saloon is much more active at night. The fair lady behind the bar is Aegislash. We are lovestruck by her, but…we are afraid to ask her what she thinks of us."

The bartender looked at the three with her single eye.

"Hello! Peace be upon you, friends! What would you like t-"

The Aegislash stopped speaking and froze immediately the instant she spotted the Shroomish in the Nidoqueen's arms. An imaginary gasp escaped her imaginary mouth, and her shield dropped from her midsection with a metallic thud.

"Are you…by…any chance…?"

Her arm, like a fine cloth or a scarf, curled around a sealed jar of a familiar brew, with a familiar face upon its label. There was no doubting what it was as the ghostly sword Pokémon set it upon the bar and unfurled her hand, revealing Stumpy's very pride and joy. Little Andrew's.

Stumpy politely asked Nidoqueen to set him on the bar, where he promptly bowed to Aegislash and sat down. Aegislash looked quite happy, starstruck even, and gave the little Shroomish some headpats. The sword's hand felt quite nice, Stumpy thought, like silk or cotton or even his own headband.

"Yeh, tha's me, alroight. Bu' please, coll me Stumpy. It's an 'ona to meet yew. 'Erd yew maede good business wif me brew!"

"That's an understatement, but…wow, that accent, Stumpy. If I may ask, where are you from that made you sound like that?"

"It's me sweet gran's accent, an' her treina's befour that. Yeh, she was reised by a 'uman, long taime ago."

Stumpy paid for a round, giving Aegislash, Spiritomb, Nidoqueen, and himself a jar each. Given his royalties, his jar was free, more or less, as another 320 Poké would go to the bank eventually. Stumpy drank his through a straw. Just one jar tends to get him buzzed and devoid of the usual manners he has. The bitter-spicy concoction flowed down Nidoqueen's vast gullet in a matter of a few seconds, and given she weighs about fifteen times more than the Shroomish she accompanies, it'd take more than a few beers to get her tipsy.

Spiritomb, on the other hand, ate his jar of Little Andrew's, glass and all, and let all the spirits in his body taste it, his chaotic wispy form laid out on the bar in orderly bliss. Aegislash lacked an entire digestive tract to enjoy the brew, but she accepted it all the same, even asking for an autograph! Stumpy took a marker from her, put it in his mouth, and scribbled some chicken scratch that looked like his name. It was rather dodgy for a signature, but it was still his scrawling, and Aegislash let a happy look come across her eye, only to have it widen in surprise at the realization of what Stumpy told her.

"...A…A human!? A REAL human? Humans haven't been seen here for at least a millenia, maybe longer. I mean, I've known of guilds and legends that have Pokémon humans in them, but still!"

"Tha's roight. But me? Nah, I'm no 'uman. Bu' me naeme, me tru naeme, th' naeme me gran gaeve me is on tha' jar, but oi say it's a naeme I don't roightly deserve. Tha' naeme means the world to me…it's that 'uman's naeme. Me gran Cybil told me stories of who 'e was."

Nidoqueen settled in, eyes half-lidded, a smile on her face. She knew this story all too well, but she never got tired of hearing it straight from his mouth.

"Trahveled th' saes, maede a fortune. Was a felanthrapest. 'Ad some friends by 'is soide, tew, and me gran Cybil was one of em'. But, as me gran would sey…Father Toime can't be beat, can't be stopt, can't be bot.

"Real Andrew's long gone, an' in 'is will 'e sent me gran to a nature reserve far away, so she could live 'er loife the way it shud. She found a proper mate an' a new loife she did. Gran was 'appy oll over agen loike. Reared some lasses an' lads, kept an oye out for her new clan an' oll the li'le Pokemon. An' she was…she was the firs' thing I ever opened me oyes to.

"Didn't know till later tha' me Mum had passed away birthin' me. And me dad…I have no idea where 'e went or who 'e is. Gran told me 'e was scared, worried, doutful that 'e 'ad what it took to raise me…An' it took a long toime till she told me I wasn't 'er real granson, either. Lef' me in shock, that. But stell, I loved 'er like a real granson does. I never wan'ed to leeve 'er soide."

The Aegislash's eye was quivering in that gem under her hilt. She looked touched and saddened. "I'm…I'm so sorry, Stumpy. You must've lived a hard life. But…where did that "Stumpy" name come from?"

"Tha', luv, that came from after me gran lef' this world behoind. Me hoight was a joke to the other Shroomesh loike me."

"Ohh…Stumpy, I…"

"It's all roight, luv. I'll wear 'at naeme loike a badge of 'onor. I came to terms long ago, tew. But, Father Toime…"

"Cannot be defeated, cannot be stopped, cannot be bargained for. This Father Time you speak of…we are aware of something similar, and only too well."

Shroomish looked over at the Spiritomb and nodded his head.

"Caeryin' on. Yeh, me gran left her earthly possessions behoind to the Breloom she gaeve birth to. But…she…she saved 'er faev'rit scarf fo' me…oi…oi jus…"

Stumpy sniffled and tears trickled down his eyes. It was hard for him to finish this part of the story. Even Nidoqueen closed her eyes and lamented all his losses. Bits of Spiritomb's essence weeped across the bar.

"Is that…on your head…?"

"Yeh, i-it is, Aegeslash…I-I miss 'er daerly…"

Nidoqueen gently picked Stumpy back up and held him tight, speaking softly in his ears. "There, there, Stumpy. Your grandma raised you right…I still wish I could meet her."

"Yew'd luv 'er. Swee'est gran in the 'ole world."

Aegislash was so moved that she too was in tears. Meanwhile, Spiritomb let off some quiet wails that, if not spooky, were woeful in their nature.

"Stumpy…I think we've had some time to rest, don't you think? Let's go to the bulletin board and put the job on there."

"Alroight…eh, Spiritomb?"

"Yes, Stumpy?"

"Taeke care. F-Fanks fo' the t-tour round toun. An' let Aegislash ask yew out firs', trus' me."

"Wait…WHAT?" Aegislash looked at the wispy Spiritomb in confusion, and then in a peeved, somewhat angry tone, said "Again? No means no, you god damn pervert!" She preps a slap across his dumb wispy face.

"B-but we wish dearly to make you happ-Oof!"

Poor Spiritomb. They sounded like a proper Pokémon to Stumpy, at least.

In any case, Nidoqueen bid farewell to Aegislash and Spiritomb and left The Saloon with a drunk, sobbing Stumpy in her soft, caring grasp. The bulletin board was outside, and Nidoqueen set Stumpy down a few minutes to write down the job description.

"And…there. Alright, Stumpy, now…we wait. Let's head back to the ship, okay?"

And so, Nidoqueen, with little Stumpy back in her arms, walked back down the wide flight of cliff steps and back up the drawbridge to their ship. Perhaps a little bit of time to breathe and collect his thoughts was enough for Stumpy to calm back down, right?

After all, there was still business to be made before he could sail back home…