The Stars have Aligned: A Collection of Diplomatic, Military and Political Incidents
Port Here Incident: Scene One
November 21st 1132 VTE, Grand Stellar Admiralty, Office of the First Prince-Admiral of the Seas
"They did WHAT!?!?!?!?!?!" screamed Rodolfo Palmieri, The First Prince-Admiral of the Marina Stellar.
"Sire, I beg you not t-" whimpered Pietro del Rocco, Second Prince-Admiral.
"Not to do what? These blasted assholes have violated our trust for the last time! We have tolerated their continued trespasses for too long. It's as if we are a mere joke to these bloody arrogant skeletons." he rips up the Communiqué and throws it "That should be our policy towards the Black Fleet, Pietro. No more!"
Pietro finally puts his foot down and pointing with aggression. "Are you mad Rodolfo? Do you want war with the Black Fleet over this? You fucking donkey! Why don't you go yell at them instead of us?"
Rodolfo pointing right back with yells "Pietro, this is why you are number two, you bloody oaf! You only have a backbone when talking to your superiors at the Admiralty yet have no backbone when it comes to these rapists and vile cretins!" putting his hands on his hips he regains his composure somewhat "Forgot about insulting each other, I have no fucking desire for war with anyone but let this be clear. If we want to be taken seriously, we must take action."
Pietro realizing his foolishness apologies "My apologies, Rodolfo, my anger got the best of m-"
"It got the best of both of us but expected from any Admiral in our fleet." Rodolfo walks over to look outside the window "Vittorio, what is the status of 4º Squadrone da Battaglia?"
Vittorio Amadeo Visconti, the Third Prince-Admiral who had remained coolly silent as these two nearly got into a fight replies in a cold voice "Should be ready for action, Sire." takes a smoke from his cigar "Should be more than enough to send the fear of death into these boners."
"Good, Good. Vice Admiral Martinelli will be the right man for this job." turning to face the two "There was a reason I assigned that son-of-a-bitch to command that Squadron."
"Upon my recommendation." said Pietro, Palmieri looks at him with anger, Pietro grins but then gets serious again "What orders do you recommend Sire for this?"
Visconti coldly speaks up "If I may, tell that Martinelli that he can gets as mad as he wants, spit in their faces, and cause a ruckus but that if he opens fire..." motioning that he will cut his throat "That shithead will be killed if he fucks this up."
"Agreed Vittorio" says Rodolfo emphatically "Moreover, tell him that the Hoomen are to play no role in this. They can just watch as they always do and let us men sort it out. I don't give a shit about the Hoomen, Squirrels or Robot fuckers. This is our matter to settle with them."
Visconti ponders for a second before saying "It will be quite the message sending that raving lunatic Martinelli and the Principessa delle Stelle to them... I also recommend that we do something to prove an even greater point to them."
"Yes Vittorio?" asks Rodolfo
"Send a similar force to the De Zeventien Provincien that they sent to Port Here. Let them taste their own medicine for once." taps off his cigar butt "Quite honestly, such a measured response would be appropriate. Let us send our own VIP too.." looks at Pietro "Pietro, I think your cool head would be good for this mission and that you would be suitable for both roles."
Pietro, sick of arguing with Palmieri everyday replies "Very well, let us prepare this at once. I will lead it!"
"Perfect!" says Rodolfo with great enthusiasm "We will teach them a lesson about respect that these walking corpses haven't learned yet."
Aboard the Principessa delle Stelle
Looking out at the rising sun is Vice Admiral Martinelli when he a messenger comes.
"Sire! The Admiralty has a message for you, urgent!" the boy says
"Thank you" he takes the letter and starts to laugh wickedly "So they have finally had enough. Perfect."
Screams across the deck "Tell the rest of my squadron to get ready to sail at once, we are headed to Port Here!"
Port Here Incident, Scene Two
December 12th, 1132 VTE, 20 Nautical Miles from Port Here, aboard the Principessa delle Stelle
Vice Admiral Martinelli was growing impatient with excitement at the humiliation he was going to inflict on the "mighty" Black Fleet soon. Not only did he have the mightiest warship in all of the Kizuna Sea as his flagship, Principessa delle Stelle. A four decked monster with 140 guns mounted on it in total, this ship required a brand new drydock built just to have her built. She was largely built for prestige reasons, but in any event, she is more than capable of living up to her size and firepower in battle, even if she is a bit top heavy.
Trailing the massive Principessa delle Stelle are two 98 Gun Second Rates, the Vittoria and Gloria. These twins are easily able to battle any First Rate and are fine sailing ships as well, like many Stellaran ships. Then there are the third rates, 6 of them in total, all armed with 76 guns and all being relatively new. The Solare, Principe di Aosta, Sfidante, Tuono, Indomabile, and the Potente. All of these ships alone could match with the threat, but that wasn't the mission. To add insult to injury, 4 large frigates were also attached, the Zenta, Amadeo, Lucio, and the Battaglia under the command of Rear Admiral Claudio di Aosta.
Martinelli wasn't going to play around with the Black Fleet. There was going to be no negotiations whatsoever, other than the demand for them to immediately leave Port Here, for them to never violate the integrity and pride of the navy again, and for them stop poking their nose into other nations business with their typical brutish ways. These Deadbeats truly thought themselves to be the rulers of the seas and had no true respect for other nations, Martinelli believed. They believe that not only could the Marina Stellare couldn't even be trusted to escort a godforsaken squirrel to the Saplings, but that they had to send their battleships to accomplish this task. He couldn't care if they were sending the Queen of the Candy Kingdom aboard that damn ship, it was our waters and they need to stick to their own seas. When he heard about the large expedition into the Ailivian Sea, he laughed, that will show them how it feels! Maybe he could get this sons-of-bitches to kiss his feet too, just needed to display the power and they would be shaking in their bones!
And his orders said nothing about not firing, just not to open fire on the Black Fleet. He was going to give them a show of force that they wouldn't soon forget. Star shells and everything. The Hoomen could kiss his arse too, they enable this and were constantly pleading with the Marina Stellare to not be mean to the poor Black Fleet. Well, they could enjoy watching his fireworks as usual. And when he was done with his whole show, he would board the flagship of the Black Fleet and tear him a new one. Dress him down in front of his crew and then as his orders said, escort them out of home waters. The Risuners? The Marina Stellare could take care of them and do just fine. They are just squirrels at the end of the day.
Port Here Incident, Scene Three
The night of December 12th, 1132 VTE, on the approaches on Port Here in the dreams of Admiral Martinelli
Giancarlo stood eagerly on his Bridge looking into a spyglass through the mist into Port Here. The Black Fleet was there alright, 3 of them if he counted correctly. Things were carrying on as normal, from his reckoning. He already had everything planned perfectly. He had the long guns on the bottom decks of his ships trained to splash 500 yards in front of the Black Fleet, some of them would get closer, while the upper decks loaded with star shells, unfused comet shells, and screamers that would detonate over the harbor and the Black Fleet ships. He did want to scare the Hoomen too, after all. To add all insult to this, he had rockets loaded on the decks that would light up the night like Suisei herself. All lights on his ships were out, no one could see anything coming until the fuses were lit. Di Aosta's frigates would swing in closer, just to make the sounds of their guns heard by all. They would be firing blanks, given their range and would trail behind the Battleline, to avoid friendly fire. It was good he and many other officers knew their guns so well, otherwise this would be disastrous. Martinelli checked his time, it was 300hrs when his first officer, Mazzone approached him.
"Sire, we are all ready to launch our «Welcoming Party» for the Black Fleet. The range is perfect."
"Thank you, Mazzone. It is finally time for our guests to be given a proper welcome. OPEN FIRE!!!!"
At this signal, the gunners of the Principessa delle Stelle lit their fuses and soon the weight of 68 guns was unleashed into the night sky, followed by the roar from the trailing ships. BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM SHHHCCCHHHEERRR BOOM SHHHCCCHHHEERRR BOOM BOOM SCEERRRERER BOOM SHCCCCHEEERRRR
The cries of "RELOAD MEN AND PREPARE FOR A SECOND BROADSIDE" were heard across the fleet amidst the thundering roar of the shells exploding in air and in crash of them in the water. The screamers were terrifying to anyone that never heard them, a true psychological weapon that was develop explicitly to scare the daylights out of enemy ports at night. Two of them, at once went flying into the building where the Risuners were staying, breaking the two window and causing minor injuries to some unfortunate Risuners that had just been woken up by the most terrifying sound they had ever heard. Now inside the building, they were actually pissing, shitting and cumming themselves in terror of these shells, louder than anything they had ever heard. The sound incited some to vomit, and caused 6 heartattacks, 4 of which were fatal.
Back aboard the Principessa delle Stelle, Martinelli was laughing like a maniac. Oh boy did he love this, the whole harbor was lit up by his shells and he saw the panicked crews of all of the ships running everywhere, Hoomen losing their minds and the Risuners jumping from the building, running for their lives. The second salvo was ready and opened up with just the same shock as the fire one. One of the shells hit the top sail of the Black Fleet's Battleship, with only a torn sail being the result. The «big boomers» of the Frigates at point blank next to the building with the Risuners which was already in chaos already and sent it further into the depths of insanity. You see, Di Aosta had loaded up firework shells that had a fuse that would explode within 200 yards of their launch, contrary to Martinelli's orders. The result was Fireworks were literally going off right next to the Risuner building, breaking all of the windows on all floors and some even exploding inside, which while doing no damage (except one case), caused many on the other floors to suffer similar to those on the ground floor. One of the Risuners actually caught on fire and jumped from the building into the water.
Martinelli saw this and nearly laughed himself to death at the sight of the squirrel jumping from the building on fire. Man, this was the greatest night of his life. The Hoomen would be pissed about their property being damaged, but they could lick his arse. This was golden. He had scared the entire city into chaos and caused a riot with his antics, but boy was it worth it when he saw the Risuners and Deadbeats suffer from the psychological damage he had caused. The ringing was so bad for some of the deadbeats that they were seen holding their hands over their ears for hours afterwards. The Risuners, as noted, suffered the worst. They suffered actual casualties, 4 souls and around 15 being wounded in some formed. Countless others would have PTSD from this. Martinelli didn't give a shit about them however, despite them being the most amusing thing, he ordered his fleet to break off and anchor. He would transfer to the Sfidante in the morning and see if his point was felt. He wasn't a fool; he would make sure the rest of the Frigates would be in range incase those Squirrels decided to do anything stupid while he dressed down this Deadbeat admiral and told him to go back where he came from.
Risuners stopped winning that night but then Martinelli woke up, and the greatest dream of his life was over. It was so real, but he still had another day to make it to Port Here. He sent word to the Hoomen about the operation and his plans and told them not to inform the Deadbeats. His dream did make him realize something, he probably shouldn't be using the secret weapons of his fleet and stick to star shells. The last thing he wanted was one either the Hoomen or deadbeats to capture these shells. sigh But he would make do with what he had and during a nap saw the aftermath and how awful it looked for him in that dream from Suisei herself. No, this won't do.
Port Here Incident, Scene Four
The night of December 13th, 1132 VTE, on the approaches on Port Here.
If there was one thing Martinelli learned from his dream, it was that he would have to tone it down or his head would be on a pike! He informed his captains about his decision, to their relief that morning and the 1000+ gun salute would be toned down to one salvo from the Ships of the Line that would be using Star shells and conventional weapons. It wasn't ideal for his ego, but Martinelli figured the squirrels or civilians getting hit, let alone the Black Fleet, would be a disaster for his nation and himself.
Unlike in the dream, the Fleet approached with a blanket of mist carpeting the harbor. The Hoomen lookouts spotted him on approach around the edge, distant from the harbor and he flashed a message to them alerting them of what he was going to do. They quickly spread word around and the Hoomen were fully prepared. No, he wasn't going to face the Guillotine this time nor Mazzone for a fuck up. At 235, they reached position and weighed anchor outside the harbor. Gunnery would be even better than in his dream and the mist would obscure his approach. He held the Frigates back completely as well.
At 245, the same dialogue from his dream came as Captain Giovanni Mazzone approach
"Viceammiraglio, we are all ready to launch our «Welcoming Party» for the Black Fleet. The range is perfect and the guns are all loaded."
"Thank you, Mazzone. It is finally time for our guests to be given a proper welcome. ON MY ORDER, READY MEN.... UNLEASH HELL!"
At this signal, the gunners of the Principessa delle Stelle lit their fuses and soon the weight of 68 guns was unleashed into the night sky, followed by the roar from the trailing ships.
BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
The screamers in his dreams were not used but the amount of star shells used lit up the sky brighter seemingly brighter than the sun itself. The panic was still there from the Black Fleet, who had no idea what was going on and were bumbling around on their ship. One Deadbeat actually tripped and fell off the ship in panic, to Martinelli's great delight. He also noticed the ships of the Royal Navy docked nearby. Phew, he was really glad Suisei saved his from what could have been an even worse disaster than his dreams, had he struck one of those ships, he would be in shit up to his neck!.
With the guns falling silent, Martinelli order Di Aosta to signal the Hoomen that he was coming in. At 400hrs, Martinelli boarded the Principe di Aosta and set for into the harbor while his other ships were anchored further out. It was time to give these deadbeats a verbal thrashing worse than the gunfire. He had the letter from the Admiralty too and another to the Hoomen, who were requested to send some men from their Admiralty, of the highest rank preferred, to meet Rodolfo, Vittorio and others at the city of Ivrea immediately. With his garlic breath ready, Martinelli was fully prepared to deliver these demands and to make the Black Fleet leave at once.
Port Here Incident, Scene Five
The morning of December 13th, 1132 VTE, on Abyss
Martinelli was about to have the time of his life! Not only had he delivered the shock and awe he wanted, but now was ready to deliver his letter of demands! The letter was simple:
Dear Black Fleet Commander,
Due to recent events, the Marina Stellare has been gravely offended by the circumstances of your arrival without our knowledge at Port Here. Upon receiving this letter, you are to do the following:Immediately leave Port Here under the supervision of the 4º Squadrone da Battaglia. You have the following options from here:
a. Return with our squadron to the port of Cittadella, where we will come to some understanding about the events that have happened, and whenceforth we can negotiate.
b. Return to the sea and back to your home port, where you can dispatch this message down the line to your own Admiralty.We have strong reason to believe that this offense was not committed out of malice, but because of some miscommunication along the lines. We have just been informed that the purpose of you being in these waters with such force is because of the Risuners thanks to the Hoomen, and to prevent future incidents that would injure your interests in the region, we would like to set for the future.
Yours Giancarlo Martinelli, 4º Squadrone da Battaglia
The best part of the letter was that Martinelli himself did not write this, nor did the Admiralty. It was Pietro Laguardia, the intelligence officer of the Principessa delle Stelle and personal secretary of Martinelli. Laguardia had been told about the whole situation by the Hoomen, and was on damage control to ensure that the actual letter, which had all kinds of curses, slurs and insults, would not reach the Deadbeats.
When Martinelli boarded the Abyss with his men, he was met with chanting of his name.
MARTINELLI MARTINELLI MARTINELLI MARTINELLI MARTINELLI MARTINELLI MARTINELLI MARTINELLI MARTINELLI MARTINELLI MARTINELLI MARTINELLI MARTINELLI MARTINELLI MARTINELLI
Must be just them trying to deflect from the embarrassment they were suffering, he thought. He opened the cabin to find Vice Admiral Kamus waiting for him. Kamus was so delighted to meet the man who gave such a show.
"You must be Martinelli, you gave us quite the show last night! Thank you, and how many I help you." said Kamus with a cheer.
"You may help me alright, read this letter and comply with its demands." he got right into Kamus's face while saying this, Kamus backed up to read the letter.
Martinelli, who was waiting for him to slip up so he could dress him down was somewhat surprised when Kamus simply replied "I see no issue with this, I didn't know we offended you, but we will report to Cittadella with you."
Martinelli looked at this "Good Cop", Laguardia with anger, saying in Cosmosian
«Pietro, what did you write on this fucking letter that made him so happy? I wanted to tear his ass a new one you dumb bastard? »
«Viceammiraglio, it had all of the slurs in the world on it! Clearly, he is a masochist and wants you to give him the dressing down he wants down in Cittadella with the other admirals! » Pietro replied confidently.
Believing he was dealing with a true imbecile, Martinelli laughs, and then points "Fine, you may join us if you have agreed to these terms. But if you renege on any of them, I will have you flogged like any other fool!"
Kamus laughs, what a joker this man is! "You have no worries; we will set sail at once."
Martinelli returned to the Principessa delle Stelle with the whole fleet celebrating. He had just "humiliated" the Black Fleet and was now taking their squadron as "captives" back to Cittadella. What a great success this whole operation had been for him! He just knew this would catapult him up the ranks and his brother would see more success! It couldn't have gone better, except for a few things, that being the success of his dreams!