Smoke Break 3
An epilogue to Lord of the Pelippers
A dark plume of smoke rose into the air following a crackle of electricity and a loud pop. It was followed by a lighter stream that was released with a disappointed sigh.
Debby the Delibird held the severed head of an Iron Bundle - or a "lil' helper'' as she called it - that she had salvaged from the Goldbird manor a few days prior. Several tools ranging from pliers to screwdrivers surrounded the sitting mailmon behind the red edifice of the Delibird Deliveries office building. She had been trying to fix it in any way she could during her free time - even on her sacred smoke breaks, as was the case now.
The gleaming head of the Iron Bundle had been inanimate ever since it was violently removed during the manor incident, but years of experience with the paradox pokemon had taught Debby some tricks. She was confident it could be brought back in some form. Placing it back on the ground in front of her, Debby took the cigarette out of her beak and stuffed it into the dirt next to the other ones. The collection of bent cigarette butts were an uncomfortable reminder of how long she had been trying to fix it today alone. The embers died off with a final tuft of gray smoke that blew across the metal head on the ground.
"I figured you were here."
Debby jumped a little, turning around to see Linoone peeking out from behind the corner before walking out in full. He still had bandages wrapped around his torso, where his ribs were still healing from his encounter with his new nemesis, Liquid Linoone... or just Mr. Goldbird, to anyone else. Debby had insisted he stay at home to rest, even threatening to cut his bonus if he dared show up to work before he was back to full health. That had made the message clear to him, and he'd spent the past couple days resting. Unfortunately, without any real entertainment, he'd found the time exceedingly boring, and thus had come to Delibird Deliveries to pass the time now that he could at least move around without any pain.
"Y'all are supposed to be recuperatin', Kaz." Debby glowered at her friend. It was a surprisingly menacing expression from the Delibird who rarely showed any other emotion than endless cheer, and Linoone flinched away instinctively. Catching her slip, she sighed and shook her head. "I'm sorry, hun. Just a lil' peeved by this." She slapped the head of the Iron Bundle. Taking the apology without a word, Linoone joined Debby amidst the scattered tools and the somewhat disturbing severed head. She'd explained that the Iron Bundle wasn't alive - not really - but it still seemed weird to the ex-human.
He sat down next to Debby, who seemed fixated on the LED eyes of her doppelganger. “What do you want to do with it?"
"The lil' helpers got a bunch of neat tricks. They can count real well, sing some songs, surveillance, alarm clock, memos... Hoot, just about anythin' y'all can think of." Debby listed off the features like they were on a back of an Amazon Alexa box.
"Wait, surveillance?" Linoone caught the odd one out. Not in the sense that it was odd for Alexa, but in that specific lineup.
"How'd y'all think we know who's naughty and nice, hun? Hoot!"
The joke stuck with Linoone, hearing her mention it so casually like it was a given. "So… I've been thinking…" he started slowly, trying to find the words. "All that stuff about Santa Claus and little helpers. You're seriously Santa's daughter?"
Debby was silent for a moment, her expression somewhat crestfallen. It was clear she wasn't too happy about the topic. Regardless, she leaned against Linoone. "That's right, hun. And yes it's what y'all are thinkin' too. Pops takes presents to the good lil' children every Christmas, grandpa before him. Krampus had a much stricter nice list though." She shuddered a little, and Linoone leaned in as well to support her in more than one way.
"That's…" Linoone started slowly, unsure what to say. He'd thought about it over the past two days, and he'd taken it in stride just like turning into a Pokemon, but to really hear it admitted out loud? Debby's brows drooped a little as a silence fell between them. "Hell, I don't know how else to say it; that's awesome, Debby!" He nudged her a little as he told her the truth. Seeing her glance up at him - as if to see if he was lying - he chuckled and asked what he came here to ask: "So, why didn't you tell me before? Were you planning to sneak down my chimney this year?"
Debby tilted her head down and covered her beak with her wings as she giggled in response. It was a soft "Hoot hoot" that made her shake with each vocalization. Linoone managed to get her like this only a handful of times before. After the initial surprise of such an odd expression, he'd found it one of his favorite aspects of Debby, and couldn't help but join with his own deep chuckle.
After a moment she knew she'd treasure in the future, Debby took a breath to stop herself from continuing and nudged Linoone back. "Y'all caught me, hun. Anyhoot, I don't really like to blab about it. It ain't like I'm ashamed of them or anythin'." She shook her head and continued. "I came down south to make a name for myself, Kaz, somethin' that I can call my own, and not somethin' I was born with. The Claus name is well enough known. Y'all heard Goldbird call me out." Just before Linoone was about to respond, she added sheepishly, "Also I didn't want y'all to think I was queer."
The word choice caught Linoone off guard - despite the serious tone - and he snorted before catching himself and chuckling. "Come on Debby, I used to be human! It's not like I'm normal either." Her own little hoot confirmed to him that he'd managed to save the blunder. Nice work, brain. You're welcome.
"I'd like to hear what kinda life y'all lived sometime, Kaz. Ain't fair only I'm sharin'." Debby commented lightheartedly. Something crawled down Linoone's spine at her comment. It wasn't like he had a bad life before, but he preferred to look to the future. His response was a simple "sometime" and a pat on Debby's head. She hooted contentedly.
For a while, both Pokémon didn’t say anything as they walked through the forest slowly getting illuminated by the rising sunlight, until Linoone, forming a faint corner smile, broke the silence.
“So… The lil helpers back in your home… They do it for free?”
"Hoot!" Debby exclaimed in confirmation, "Momma says they ain't really alive either, so about as soulless as any janitor I met to boot!" They continued on, laughing in unison, though that came to a halt fast as Linoone held his sore ribs and cringed in pain. It still struck as odd to him that she knew exactly what he was referring to, despite being used to Debby's usual uncanny knack to seemingly stay in loop despite the joke being decidedly human. Her follow up didn't help much either. She ran ahead a few steps and struck an exaggerated pose after spinning around to face Linoone, shouting out loud, "Y'all thought it was Metal Gear, but it was a weapon to surpass Metal Gear!"
Linoone stopped with a wide smile on his face, keeping his laughter contained to avoid further pain. They looked at each other for a moment before Debby dropped her pose and hooted happily. Linoone had to ask now. That wasn’t just a Metal Gear reference, it was a butchered Jojo reference as well. “Alright Debby, what the hell is up with that?”
Debby had already mostly turned around, but paused to look over her shoulder by tilting her head backwards. Her gaze was soft, as Debby not only looked to her dearest friend, but something beyond that. Linoone knew Debby well, and the moment's silence meant she was contemplating something. Both knew what the question meant, and he wouldn't let her get away feigning ignorance this time. Only after he made his mind on that, did a small voice called self-preservation instinct made the point that he wanted to pry information out of Debby, the same Pokemon who just demolished an entire manor. The voice was immediately beaten down by his sense of trust for Debby. She wouldn't hurt him, because he wouldn't hurt her either.
"A bit of Christmas Magic, hun." Debby replied with a wink and turned around to continue on the path to Capim Town, hooting over her shoulder, "Y'all are definitely on the nice list, so I'm sure y'all will get to see it sometime!"
“Sometime”
They both had things they didn't like to bring up, Linoone realized. At least she wasn't hiding it from him anymore, and the answers could wait.
Linoone and Debby sat together in silence. It seemed neither had anything more to say as they found comfort in each other's presence. Debby shuffled slightly against his body and brought her head closer to his before she began preening his cheek fur again. Blood rushed to his face as he craned his head closer. Looking down into her eyes made his heart skip a beat, it was too much to resist and he attempted to return the gesture; awkwardly nibbling at Debby's cheek feathers.
Linoone's best guess at an acceptable kiss elicited a hooty giggle from Debby, who took his head between her wings and pressed their foreheads together.
Something passed between the two at that moment.
A friendship they couldn't find anywhere else.
A feeling no one else could give.
The knowledge that here was someone who thought of you first and foremost.
All of those and more.
In all its complexity, it was simply one emotion that drowned out all the others like distractions and melted away even the largest of worries. For in that moment, the two only felt one thing; Love for one another.
The still moment lingered on in silence until Debby tilted her head and rubbed against his forehead like a cat does to someone's leg to leave their scent. The movement felt a little hesitant to Linoone, but perhaps he just wasn't accustomed to… this… cuddling? For now, Linoone simply returned the gesture before Debby pulled him into a tight hug. He felt her sigh contentedly and realized he’d been holding his breath for a while now too, he sighed as well.
I should say it, right? Now’s the time?
Linoone’s heartbeat drummed in his ears. He should say it, he wanted to at least, but the words were hard to form. He knew them, and it was just three simple words, three syllables that -
“ZZT! TERMINATE!”
A loud robotic voice interrupted Linoone’s confession! He instinctively tackled Debby onto the ground and out of harm’s way. Keeping with the momentum, he rolled over to his feet and pulled Debby along to stand between the murderous robot and his -
"Kaz?" Debby pulled on Linoone's fur, bringing him back to reality. The head of the Iron Bundle was still in the same spot, the LED visor that doubled as its eyes flashed with alien runes and glitched out several times. Debby in turn was looking directly at him in surprise, stuck in his arms and pressed against his body. "It's fine, hun. It can't hurt y'all anymore."
Debby peeled away from his hold to check on the head, leaving him dumbfounded where he stood. Linoone had jumped in to save her in the mansion before, but this time it felt different. Just like everything else in the past few minutes. He felt he needed some time to process everything and thus took the distraction eagerly, joining Debby by the newly animated head. "It sounds like it wants to hurt us, Debby."
"Hoot! Poor fella's so lost that it's like it lost it's head!" Debby chuckled before sighing, "Sorry, been a long day." She tapped a few times on the bright yellow beak of the Iron Bundle, causing the eyes to glitch out again before settling into more alien runes. Debby turned to Linoone, but avoided eye contact, keeping her attention on the head. "Rebootin' it now. Don't matter what Goldbird did to the poor thing, this oughta bring it back to normal."
The symbols turned into a progress bar that spanned from one eye to the other, and the pair waited in silence. Linoone fought to not comment on factory resetting the Iron Bundle like it's a phone. Something still sat wrong with him about the Paradox Pokemon. Perhaps that was the point, he thought. Eventually the bar filled and the head played a familiar jingle that made Linoone smirk. Of course it'd be that sound.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rh8dE0ic6E0
"Just a moment, hun. I gotta say the code." Debby picked up the head in her wings, bringing it on level with her face. After a moment's hesitation - and a glance towards Linoone - she spoke again. "Red, 25, 12, Green, X-ray, Mike, Alpha, Sierra." She listed off the words in monotone and each one made the head's eyes flash. Finishing off the code, the Iron Bundle's eyes became normal again, and the LEDs mimicked blinking.
"ZZT! STRUCTURAL INTERGRITY: 20%. ERROR. LOCOMOTION FAILED. ERROR. GREETING GESTURE FAILED. ERROR. CONTINGENCY GESTURE FAILED. SCAN COMPLETE. RESULTS: COMPLETE ABSENCE OF TORSO. PLEASE CONTACT - ERROR - HEAD MODE: ACTIVATED. ZZT! USER RECOGNIZED: DEBBY CLAUS. MERRY CHRISTMAS, MISTRESS."
"Hoot! That worked out better than I thought!" Debby turned the severed head to Linoone and smiled brightly. "Ain't that somethin', hun? We gotta lil' greeter for the office now!" Before he had a chance to respond, the Iron Bundle shot lights up and down Linoone's body, like scanning him for something.
"UPDATE: NAUGHTY LIST. SUBJECT: DEBBY CLAUS. REASON: FRATERNIZATION WITH-"
The Iron Bundle was cut short by Debby shoving the head into her tail bag. She let out a nervous hoot "Don't mind that none, hun. It just needs a lil' bit more work after all. I'll go take this rascal home where it's safe and won't cause no scene." The Delibird continued as she frantically threw the scattered tools in after the head. "We'll see tomorrow if it's office material, I ain't really expert on these anyway. So be there bright and early! We got a bit of a backlog to get through now."
Linoone didn't have the heart to tell her that he still technically had tomorrow off, and just nodded instead. "I'll see you then, Debby!" He raised his paw to wave to her, but a realization stopped him. Instead, he took a step forward and sheepishly licked her cheek and pressed his head against Debby's like she'd shown him before. The Delibird - quite caught off guard - just stood there, but she managed to collect herself and nip at his fur before he pulled away. Linoone chuckled and patted her on the head before heading off. He felt like he was walking on clouds right now.
Debby beamed as she watched Linoone walk away. She wondered how many times she'd walked away from him to avoid an uncomfortable topic. Enough times that he'd learned to recognize the signs, she supposed. It felt unfair to her that she still treated him like so. Before he'd managed to get too far, she lifted her wings to her beak and shouted after him.
"Kaz!"
The distant figure turned around and looked back. A faint "What?" echoed back in response.
Debby looked for a second, and decided she didn't care for gossip should anyone overhear. She took a breath and yelled back.
"I love you!"
Later that day, in a lonely shack outside of Capim Town, Linoone looked at the drawing in his paws. He'd made it the day after the raid on Goldbird's mansion, to never forget that walk back. Her last words still rang in his head, and he held the paper to his chest as he fell asleep in his bed.
