Finding a God by /bara/hmoma writefren

Like many twentysomethings, you were currently undergoing an identity crisis
Unsure of your place in the world, you decided to go and "find yourself"
And so you decided to travel.
A crash course in Chinese and Mandarin allowed you to set up a backpacking tour of China
You had been in the country for a month, and while it was beautiful, and the food was amazing. You were kind of lonely
Outside of the tourist-y areas the locals weren't interested in dealing with a clueless looking foreigner
You had a decent enough fluency to keep scammers and scumbags away, but there was an ache for some kinship
Shaking off the gloom. You thought about today's itinerary.
Supposedly there was an old Qing dynasty shrine right outside the village you were staying in, you wanted to check it out before you got back on the road.
After a short chat and some haggling, a kind older woman running a vegetable stall pointed you in the direction of the shrine (after convincing you to buy a particularly nice looking head of lettuce)
Now equipped with some very nice looking lettuce, you found an old path among the bamboo, just as described, you pushed forward.
Nestled in a clearing stood a shrine, faded and weathered with age.
There were little dolls surrounding it, all rabbit shaped. Weird.
It seemed like nobody had been here in a while, there was dust all over everything
hmm... it felt wrong to just leave it like this.
Shrugging off your pack, you gave everything a quick little brushing off. Much better!
At the heart of the shrine was an empty space, maybe that lettuce would look cute surrounded by all the rabbit paraphernalia?
Plus you wouldn't have to lug it around if you used it as a respectful offering right?
You plopped it down sitting it neatly in the middle
You then placed your palms together and bowed, praying for a safe trip (and maybe a little romance...)
As soon as the idea of a lover entered your head, the lettuce proceeded to explode
The last thing you remembered was a flash of light and the leafy vegetable in front of you violently exploding
The ringing in your head faded as a muffled voice shouted something
There was a something touching you, it felt like a teddy bear, soft and warm...
Forcing your eyes open, you caught a blurry shape over you, as white as fresh snow
As the pain faded and your lungs remembered how to breathe, your eyes and ears sharpened back up
"Oh thank the Jade emperor! You're Alive!"
You dared to try opening your eyes
Still stunned, your eyes and hands roamed over yourself, gently pressing and checking for injuries, you seemed ok but you might have broken something.
"It's alright! I already performed a blessing, you should be fine"
A blessing?
You turned to the voice, wanting to ask what the hell happened
You never managed to form a complete sentence when you met the ruby red eyes of your savior
It was...
A rabbit?
Standing over you with a worried look on its face (snout?) was what appeared to be some kind of rabbit-man
He was saying something, but your brain short circuited as you tried to process what happened
Maybe this was a hallucination?
Double taking and blinking a bunch didn't seem to make this rabbit-man go away though
You looked over his form, a fluffy humanoid body covered in snow white fur, lithe and...very naked
There were red markings running along his body, from his eyes down over his flat tummy, and along some absolutely sinful legs.
His large rabbit ears drooped as he realized you weren't listening, he bent over and extended a hand (paw?) to you
Running on autopilot, you gripped a very soft paw
You kind of expected to just phase through, there was no way this guy was real after all, it was probably just your brain self-destructing right?
But the rabbit pulled you up with surprising ease anyway
"Sorry about that mortal, it's been a while since I've been summoned and I'm a little out of practice"
You asked what exactly he meant
The rabbit raised a brow at you "You made the offering right? Prayed to the shrine?"
You nodded, looking at the shrine, now covered in a confetti of still-smoking lettuce
The rabbit then smirked "well, your prayers have been answered!"
"I, the great Tu'er Shen, Leveret god, have made a decision!"
With a wave of his hand, the debris on the shrine was carried away by a gust of wind.
He stepped with confidence onto the offering table of the shrine
"You, mortal, prayed for a safe journey and a dashing male lover!"
Woah wait you didn't specify male or dashi-
"With your bountiful offering, I had no choice but to accept"
This was surreal
"You and I shall become both travel companions and lovers!"
...You tried to recall the emergency number for an ambulance, was it 110 or 120? You were clearly having some kind of concussion-induced psychotic break
He continued as you pulled your phone out "Don't let my gentle form deceive you, I shall protect you valiantly"
Damn, no bars...
"And as a god of love..."
You looked up to see him with his back facing you "Satisfaction will be guaranteed"
His face had a sultry smirk plastered over it as his slender hand gripped at one of his butt cheeks, showing gently pulling at the meaty glute and flashing a perfect, pink hole at you
Maybe getting your head checked was a little too hasty.