Internship Intro: Clown Party
(Author's Notes: This story is a continuation of Popsy's Clown World)
I. Daiichi Kai Manor
It was early Saturday morning and Inigo grinned as he watched his favorite TV hero Popsy dance across the flickering screen. The black and white set in the quiet side room of the manor was a refuge where the young boy could escape for a little while.
"C'mon kids, time to do the Popsy Polka!" the wacky clown cheered, leading an enthusiastic group of children and assorted barnyard animals in a silly dance. Inigo giggled and swayed from his spot on the tatami mat, trying to mimic their moves. He was so engrossed in the show that he barely heard the heavy steps coming down the hall. He quickly muted the television.
"Inigooo! Where are you? It's time for mountain training," Inigo's oldest brother Sato shouted. "Father's calling for you! Youuuu're in biiig trouble!"
Inigo squeaked in dismay as the sliding door to the room started to move, but before it could open, he heard another voice.
"You just missed him," Kaz, Inigo's second brother, said breezily. "I saw the little runt head towards the west wing five minutes ago. I think he's gonna hide in the well again." Sato huffed in annoyance and stomped off down the hall. Once his footsteps faded, Kaz slid the door open, silver hair shining as he sauntered over to plop down next to Inigo with a grin.
"Thanks Kaz! You're the best!" Inigo chirped, giving his brother a quick hug.
"Yeah yeah, just don't go making a habit out of shirking your duties," Kaz shrugged. "I guess, I don't mind sending Sato on a wild goose chase."
Inigo blinked twice, "Did Farmer Jin's geese get out again?"
Kaz ruffled the boy's hair affectionately. "Nevermind." His gaze drifted to the TV where Popsy was now prancing around with a funny chicken hat on her head. "I don't get why you like this show so much."
Inigo bounced a little, smile big and bright. "She's funny and silly! And Popsy's friends with everyone. She makes everybody happy no matter what!" His eyes shone with admiration for the colorful hero, "When I grow up, I wanna be just like her and make people smile all the time too!" Inigo declared.
Kaz snorted, mussing Inigo's hair again. "You? A clown? Yeah right. Father and Sato would never allow it. When that day comes, I'll be a parade conductor."
Inigo just kept grinning. Popsy launched into a silly song and dance number. Training would have to wait. For now, little Inigo was content in enjoying his favorite show, lost in the silliness and laughter, dreaming of the day he could spread joy like that himself.
II: Popsy's Apartment
Inigo stood outside the door with the biggest grin on his face. He stiffled a yawn and adjusted his red tie. He couldn't sleep a wink the night before. He couldn't decide which merch to bring, but eventually, he settled on his limited edition silver age Popsy hoodie. He had to send in hundreds of boxtops to win that one. The rest of his Popsy fan merch were left behind in his apartment, guarded by a grouchy Junichi, and looked after by Curie who promised to water his plants while he was away on this internship. He didn't want to scare his fated mentor by going fan crazy on her. And besides - he glanced behind him at his four classmates: Sally, Yui, Hoge, and Chihiro. He didn't want to give a bad impression on all the cute girls in his internship.
They had all met up at the train station twenty minutes ago, and walked together to 2206 Minami Ward, a nondescript five-story apartment building overlooking the Nishi Hazukashi River.
As they waited outside the rundown apartment door, Inigo watched his fellow interns. Sally was grumbling under her breath, clearly not thrilled to be here. Yui had her arms crossed with a conflicted look. Inigo knew she had mixed feelings, but she was a Popsy fan too. Behind them, Hoge stood attentively next to an unusually eager Chihiro.
His eyes met Hoge's and Inigo winked. It'll be fine. This is all part of the set-up. He tried to reassure her mentally before glancing to his left. A large hooded fellow wearing an oversized yellow raincoat nodded to him before entering the apartment next to Popsy's.
"Hello!" Yui knocked harder on the door.
"Do we have the wrong apartment?" Chihiro pondered.
"No. This is the correct one," Hoge said. "2206 Minami Ward, Apartment 15."
"Are you sure? Bet you made a mistake," scoffed Sally, double-checking the information on her phone.
"Positive."
"Tch, she's obviously busy. Let's just come back tomorrow," Sally frowned.
"Nah, I believe in Popsy. She'll be here. She's just fashionably late to the party," Inigo remarked.
"To her own party?" Sally complained.
"You just don't understand clown parties," he pointed out.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
Some sort of demon was harrassing Akagi and knocking on her door. She crawls over beer cans and garbage bags to see who it is. She takes a deep breath and opens the door slightly, squinting her eyes enough that only the tiniest bits of vision could be seen. She pulls on the door, letting the light fully into her apartment. Unfortunately for her, it's even worse than a demon. Outside in the hall, there were - teenagers.
"Ah... I'm- I'm shorry but I... I-I don't want any cookies right now."
Her words come out slightly slurred and mumbled, a mixture of the alcohol in her system and the poor physical state she's in making it hard to speak clearly. Still on her hands and knees, Akagi has to really crane her neck up to see the kids at her doorstep. She blinks a few times to clear up her vision of the bleariness. You know... for some reason, these kids look familiar...
"P... Popsy?"
She reaches up with one hand and rubs her eye, trying to get it to clear up. The last thing she wants to hear is that her vision is starting to go too. She'd look like such a dork in glasses, not to mention how expensive they'd be. It takes her a few moments to put the pieces in front of her together. That somehow someone who knows her hero name has shown up at her apartment.
"How did you... get this address?"
The teenagers don't say anything for a few moments. One of them looks at one of their friends, and another just looks flabbergasted.
"We're... here for the internship?"
Akagi's mind starts to swirl, memories flooding into her head at the mention of an internship. She had attended a tournament hosted by Shiketsu with Ryusei. And he was talking about putting out invitations for students. Her getting a letter saying that more than one student was interested in interning under her. That's why Ryusei is busy; he's training his own batch of students. It all makes sense now. So, that was all real? It wasn't just a dream she had? She really did have people who were going to try to learn from her of all people. She was going to be responsible for students with some of the highest potentials in all of Japan.
Oh...
Oh no..
"Oh no, oh no," Akagi muttered frantically under her breath. This could NOT be happening.
Hoge stared down at the disheveled woman sprawled on the floor, squinting up at them through the partially open door. This was meant to be Popsy, their mentor for the internship program? Hoge felt her eye involuntarily twitch. She watched Popsy mumble something about cookies before attempting to close the door.
Suppressing a sigh, Hoge closed the door for Popsy. The others all turned to her.
"Hey, who was that?" Inigo asked.
Hoge counted slowly to five in her head. When she opened the door, Popsy was still there on the ground, blearily peering up at the group. Without a word to the others, Hoge turned on her heel and strode purposefully down the hallway and out of the building.
Seeing one of the teens leave in disgust, Akagi panicked and quickly slammed the door shut in the students' faces. Ignoring their muffled sounds of surprise and protest from the hallway outside, she scrambled over to her pet rat.
“Janna! What do I do??" she whispered urgently to the rodent. "There's children here expecting me to teach em!”
Janna merely twitched her nose and squeaked. Hardly helpful advice.
"Maybe I could sneak out the fire escape and hide on the roof until they leave?" she plotted in a whisper. Janna gave a doubtful squeak.
"You're right, the ladder's broken isn't it," Akagi sighed.
Janna squeaked. "Oh butterscotch, looks like I gotta face them. Should I try pretendin' I ain't home?" Akagi wondered. "Maybe they'll give up and go away..."
She sat and waited for them to leave. Minutes passed by but even as she said it and, she knew it was hopeless. The kids had clearly already seen her and they would wait all day to get her. There was no backing out now without crushing their hopes and giving them, along with Ryusei and Ito, ammo to further criticize her floundering pro hero career.
With no way out, Popsy clutched her throbbing head and trudged back towards the door. She peeked out sheepishly at the waiting students. At least a few of them seemed familiar from what she could blearily recall of the tournament. Popsy paused to gather some materials, then she took a deep breath and bounced forward. With a wave of her hand, she threw a small flurry of confetti made from old magazines and ramen covers.
"Welcome to the internship! Tada!" she announced, forcing enthusiasm.
The kids stared blankly. After a beat, the blonde boy actually cheered. Popsy deflated, the confetti fluttering sadly to the ground.
"Eh, sorry 'bout that," she said, flashing the bemused teens an unsteady grin. "Wasn't quite myself. C'mon in and make yerselves at home!"
She tried her best to affect an air of confidence as she welcomed them inside. But the effect was somewhat diminished as she immediately tripped over an empty beer can. At least her rat seemed impressed with the show she was trying to put on. Ugh. This internship thing was off to a bad start. But if Popsy had one talent, it was putting on a bubbly face through disaster.
"Right! Welcome to Castle Popsy," she said, stepping aside. "Mind the mess."
Exchanging uncertain glances, the students filed inside. Empty takeout containers, beer cans and random knickknacks covered every surface.
Akagi frantically looked around for the paperwork from the school. Where had she tossed it? Finally she spotted the crumpled letters under a towering stack of pizza boxes. "Aha! Found them."
She skimmed the pages. "Let's see who we got here. Inigo Myoga..." She read about his shapeshifting construct quirk and raised an eyebrow at his disciplinary record. "Ten detentions in one semester? You tryin' to break my record there, kid?"
Inigo grinned sheepishly.
Akagi continued reading. "Sally McCathy. I remember you from the beach. Says here you got into some legal trouble overseas? Charges dropped though if you finish probation at Shiketsu." Sally shifted uncomfortably. Woops. Was that supposed to be a secret?
"Then we got Hoge Nyoro." Akagi whistled, impressed. She did a sweep of the room. Huh? "Which one of you is Nyoro?"
"I'm here," Hoge said quietly as she appeared by the door, holding two 8/12 convenient store bags. She had purchased several large boxes of heavy duty trash bags. Hoge stepped into the room and began matter-of-factly gathering up empty beer cans and food containers scattered around the room.
"Jumpin' biscuits! Okay! Didn't see you there! Glad you decided to stick around," Akagi blinked twice, maybe she did need glasses. She looked at Nyoro's file. "You must be some kind of genius, huh? What's your secret? I bet you ain't never gotten below a perfect score on anything. Welcome onboard, young man!"
"Actually she's a-" Inigo tried to interrupt.
Popsy blinked at Hoge in confusion, "Uh, whatcha doing there kiddo?"
Hoge shot her a withering look. "I am improving the cleanliness and order of this environment. It is unsuitable for human inhabitants in its current state."
"Oh, well, that's thoughtful of you!" Popsy laughed. "But ol' Popsy likes a bit of mess now and then. Gives the place character!"
Hoge just shook her head and handed trash bags to Chihiro and Inigo.
"Okay, moving on!" Akagi turned to the next student. "Sagara Yui? I saw you at the beach too. Former villain member, huh? Guess Aiko's tryin' to straighten you out. "
Yui looked away, cheeks red. She wanted to snap something rude out of embarrassment at being called out, especially by Popsy. But the words died on her tongue as she met Popsy's friendly grin.
"We all got chapters we're not so proud of," Popsy said with a wink. "I won't judge. And hey, maybe we can get your record cleaned up too!"
Yui blinked in surprise. Most heroes wouldn't want anything to do with an ex-villain. But here was Popsy, offering her a chance despite her past. Yui managed a small, grateful smile. Maybe doing some good here would help get her life on track. She could try at least.
"Yeah...I'll do my best, Popsy-san," she mumbled.
"Atta girl!" Popsy cheered, giving her an encouraging pat on the back. "We'll make a hero outta you yet!"
"And lastly Miss Mitsurugi."
Chihiro bowed respectfully. "It's an honor to meet you, Popsy-sensei."
Akagi's face fell as she read the details of the girl's past. "Oh dang, that's real depressing. My Daddy's dead too. You have my condolences."
"Thank you, sensei."
Akagi glanced around at all the kids and scratched her head. "And I'm Akagi Sanpatchi, also known as Popsy. Uh.. not what you expected huh?" she could tell from the looks they were giving her.
"So, there you have it for introductions. Any questions?"
"Yeah, where do we put our stuff?" Sally asked, one hand on her hip.
"Preferably, somewhere clean and private," Hoge added.
"Just place it anywhere!" Akagi answered.
"Where's the rest of the Popsy agency?" the blonde boy asked eagerly.
"I don't think there's any room for us in here," Yui said. "We're supposed to stay with you for a month."
"Uh, frankly this is it- and we'll get bunkbeds or something," Akagi said with a sigh.
The optimism she had mustered dissolved, replaced by the cold reality that she was absolutely not qualified to mentor these students. After reading their backgrounds, these kids were almost as much of a mess as she was! She would just be making things worse for them. With some effort she put on her biggest smile. There was no use making their opinion of her worse. She'll put on an act, put a return label on the kids, and get back to binge watching wrestling. But she was gonna have to let them down easy and she had the perfect spot to break the news.
"Welp! Before I hand out the syllabus! I'm starvin'! What do yal say we head out for a bite to eat? Pizza sound good? Teenagers still eat pizza, right?" The students murmured and she led them out of the room.
III. Polly Pepperoni's Pizza Palace
As they exited the building, Akagi pulled out her phone to text Ryusei.
Akagi: SOS
Akagi: The baby heroes are here. What do I do?
Ryusei: Give them a chance. Maybe they'll surprise you.
Akagi groaned. That was the last thing she wanted to hear.
Chihiro waited patiently as they crossed the street towards the restaurant, a slight smile hovering on her normally somber face. She didn't follow much news so all she knew of Popsy came from Inigo's enthusiastic tales. He described the colorful hero as a beacon of laughter and cheer who could ease any sadness.
As Popsy led them outside, promising pizza, Chihiro drifted closer. She studied her new sensei's exaggerated movements and goofy jokes, committing them to memory. If she could learn even a fraction of Popsy's skill, it would help immensely on her quest to connect with other people.
When Popsy stumbled tipsily into her, Chihiro reflexively caught her arm to steady her. Popsy giggled. "Careful there! Ol' Popsy's just a little clumsy today. Haven't been out in a while. Is it always this sunny?"
Chihiro simply smiled back serenely. "It's no trouble, sensei." She gently guided the wobbling hero along, patiently. Chihiro felt that Popsy radiated a bright, silly energy even when she was in her run-down apartment. With this teacher's guidance, maybe she would become someone who could make people smile too.
The little bell on the pizza parlor door jingled merrily as Popsy escorted the students inside the faded retro eatery. Scuffed checkered tile and cracked red vinyl booths added to the joint's dilapidated charm. A few scattered patrons chatted over steaming pies under the watchful glass eyes of aged animatronics on a corner stage.
"Kids take a booth! Order anything you want. Just don't ask for the chocolate pizza sauce," Popsy waved enthusiastically to a skinny, cheerful-looking woman behind the counter, whose verdant ponytail matched her green and white striped uniform. "Lin-Lin! How's my favorite pizza pal doing?" Popsy greeted warmly, bounding up to give the woman an enthusiastic hug, nearly knocking over a pile of pizza boxes.
"Akagi! Good to see ya!" Lin laughed, returning the hug. Her nose wrinkled slightly at the wave of stale beer smell. "I was startin' to think you skipped town. Haven't seen your mug in ages!"
As the two friends caught up, the students filed into an empty western style diner booth. Inigo stared after Popsy, looking uncertain. The usually bubbly boy was oddly quiet and pensive.
"You guys are sure...that's really her?" he asked Sally and Yui. "She seems...different somehow."
Sally scoffed. "Of course it's her, doofus, we saw her use her quirk at the beach. Don't you remember?"
Yui nodded gruffly. "Hard to forget nearly getting stabbed by sunlight. But yeah, that's Popsy, no doubt." She picked at a ragged nail. "Kinda weird seeing a pro hero living like... that though."
Inigo rubbed his neck. "I guess I must've missed the big fight. I was loopy sliding people to safety from the daylight lady," He shook his head, resolve hardening.
"But you're right, that's gotta be her! Just maybe going through some stuff, y'know? I've decided. I'm gonna do whatever I can to help her out! I can save her." Gigan cheered by his shoulder and they gave each other a thumbs up.
Before the others could respond, a bored waitress sauntered over smacking her gum. "Welcome to Polly Pepperoni's Pizza Palace, can I grab you guys something?" She handed each of them a menu.
"I'll get the chicken barbeque pizza with normal sauce," Yui said suspiciously.
"Yeah. I'll take a roasted mushrooms and green chile pizza," Inigo said smoothly.
Hoge gazed seriously at the extensive menu, arms crossed pensively over her notebook.
"I'll take #8 and #6, triple decker ultra combo with extra sauce but divide the toppings in half," she declared, pushing her voice so the waitress could hear. At the woman's odd look, she elaborated. "Bacon, red peanut curry, and calamari on one side, pumpkin, olives, jalapeños, pineapple on the other. And...no cheese."
The waitress' eye twitched slightly as she finished scribbling the convoluted order.
"As if you could get any worse..." Sally pointed out. "Who orders pizza with no cheese? I'll take pepperoni please. The Polly classic!"
"Oh! No cheese on mine too," Inigo added confidently.
After Chihiro requested a veggie pie with mushrooms and light sauce, the waitress left, an awkward silence descended on the group. Inigo was quiet, fidgeting with a napkin after his previous declaration. Hoge busied herself scribbling extensive notes about optimal pizza ingredients.
Sally scowled, shattering the tense atmosphere. "So are we really sticking around?"
Inigo looked wounded. "I know she seems a little lost right now, but together we can help guide her back to glory. You know she was this close to reach the top 10. She would've been number one," His eyes took on a dramatic shine.
Yui shrugged and leaned back. "Whatever, I'm just here for the free pizza. Happy I don't have to work today. Billy's been acting weird, talking about Africa all the time."
Hoge glanced up from her notebook, adjusting her glasses. "I understand your dedication, Inigo. However, statistically speaking, depressed mentors correlate strongly to unsatisfactory progress." She tapped her pen decisively. "If Popsy-sensei remains non-functional, the school would likely permit us to transfer internships without penalty."
Sally narrowed her eyes, "I might stay if she and Myoga leaves."
Inigo looked stricken. "What? No way! I'd never bail on Popsy!" He crossed his arms defiantly. "A true fan supports their oshi through thick and thin! Even the messy apartment is endearing and relatable. Beer cans everywhere, cigarrette butts... she's just like me for real."
Chihiro gazed softly toward the counter where Popsy was enthusiastically recounting some story to the chuckling owner.
"She does seem to be trying. There's a light there, diminished but not extinguished," Chihiro remarked in her wispy voice. "I believe with patience and compassion, Popsy-sensei will guide us well."
Inigo pumped a fist, flashing Chihiro a grateful grin. "Yeah! What she said!" He threw an arm confidently around Hoge's shoulder. "Whaddya say? As a group, let's stay in and give Popsy a shot." He winked roguishly.
Hoge's eyes narrowed slightly. She observed Popsy wistfully gazing around the run-down yet clearly sentimental establishment. Hoge gave a small sigh, and leaned subtly into Inigo's half-embrace, tracing two fingers across his bicep before shaking him off.
"It'll reflect poorly on our record to abandon our assignment on the first day. I've decided to stay," she said before getting up to use the bathroom.
Inigo beamed as the others nodded in agreement.
Sally shifted uncomfortably in the sticky vinyl booth. The aging restaurant had clearly seen better days. She picked at her slice of pizza, feeling out of sorts. Since she didn't participate in the Shiketsu tournament and failed the provisional license exams, Sally had very few options when it came to internships. Rosethorn-sensei had offered, but it felt like she offered out of pity. Sally had chosen to go with her second option, the clown hero. Sure, Popsy had fallen out of favor due to some scandals, but Sally still remembered seeing footage of her high up in the hero rankings as a child. She was goofy, but as Sally saw at the beach, she was capable.
To see the hero, though - disheveled, living by a dingy apartment full of beer cans and takeout containers - it made Sally's second guess her decision. She wanted to be back home with Noah. Instead she was here, surrounded by some of her more annoying classmates. Hoge had been shooting her suspicious looks. Yui was scowling and muttering under her breath. Inigo seemed oblivious, cheerfully chattering on about some super move he wanted Popsy to teach them. And Chihiro...well, Sally still wasn't quite sure what to make of her, she guessed they were friends after that talk they had at the dojo.
Sally sighed, picking at her pizza crust. This whole thing felt like a disaster already. Maybe she should just take a train back and forget this stupid internship, but after all the effort she put into passing the remedial exams, this was her chance to succeed. But she would've volunteered to fight another tank drone if she knew she was gonna be stuck like this for a month. She glanced at her phone and saw encouraging texts from Noah and Tame cheering her on. She might as well try. If there's anybody out there who knows how to handle bad publicity, it would be Popsy.
Hoge leaned against the grimy bathroom sink, nose crinkled in distaste as she tuned out the steady drips echoing through stained porcelain. She couldn't believe a supposed professional hero would bring them to such an unhygienic establishment. The woman clearly needed guidance in proper hygiene and self-care.
Hoge gazed sightlessly into the cracked, spotted mirror. As a minor, she shouldn't have to be the one to provide direction to an adult more than twice her age. And yet, Popsy was utterly lost, wallowing in chaos and poor life choices. Somehow Hoge found it intriguing, especially after all the stories that Inigo had told. For the sake of the others and herself, she had decided then at the table that she would transform Akagi Sanpatchi into a respectable mentor, no matter what it took. Hoge would teach Popsy firm boundaries and order, even if the woman resisted.
The bathroom door creaked open and Popsy entered, with Chihiro peeking inside after her. Hoge shot Chihiro a tired glance. She hoped Popsy's slovenly ways hadn't already corrupted her friend. As Hoge strode briskly towards the pro hero, she made fierce eye contact with Popsy. "The bathroom lacks even basic hygiene standards. I sincerely hope the kitchen is properly sanitized."
Popsy laughed awkwardly. "Aw, Lin-Lin always keeps a clean shop!"
Hoge's eyes narrowed behind her glasses. "I will be confirming that. Now, to address the issue of your living conditions..."
And as her diminutive mentor-in-training Popsy shrank under her stern gaze, Hoge, mentally compiled an extensive list of improvements to demand from the hapless clown.
Popsy scratched her head. "I mean, I guess I could tidy up a bit..."
"We will start by properly sorting and removing the trash," Hoge declared. "Then a thorough deep cleaning. And I am buying you a daily planner."
"For cripes sake, I ain't a child!" Popsy pouted. "Don't need no scrawny lil' intern mother-hennin' me!"
Hoge met her gaze coolly. "Then I suggest you start acting less juvenile. This will be a valuable learning opportunity...for both of us."
She held out a hand. "Now, do we have an arrangement? I wish to help you, Popsy-san."
Popsy sighed, then grinned wryly. "How bout' we wait til' we get out there. I want to say something to all of you first." Popsy side-stepped and headed for the door.
Hoge sighed. This mission would require patience, but molding Popsy into an acceptable role model was now her solemn duty. She refused to abandon this foolish task now.
Popsy cheered loudly as the animatronic band finished their cheesy kids' song. "Woo! Yeah, Polly Pepperoni! Shake those tail feathers!" The plastic parrot gave a jerky bow as Popsy vigorously clapped. Maybe she was a little too enthusiastic about this place, but it brought back good memories.
She shook her head to focus. She's stalled enough.
Akagi walked back to the kids. "Sorry 'bout spacing out there," she chuckled. "Now, where were we..." Her face fell as she remembered - she was about to tell them this whole mentorship thing was a mistake.
"Right...uh, truth is kids, I think we need to have ourselves a serious chat." She looked down, rubbing the back of her neck. "I really want to help prepare the next generation and all, but I gotta be straight here. I'm just not cut out to be teaching anybody right now."
She met each of their gazes. "Look at me! I'm a wreck! Haven't been out crimefighting in ages, my quirk's all screwy and don't work... Hasn't worked in a while," She sadly wiggled her normal, unrubbery arms. "And well, clearly I got more issues than a magazine stand. Even if I wanted to, I don't have the juice to be anyone's teacher.""
She gestured around her. "Can't even keep my own dang house clean!" She gave a hollow laugh. "When was the last time I even used my quirk properly, much less thrown down with any villains? Dang evil-doers nowadays take one glimpse of pathetic ol' Popsy and just bust a gut laughin'.
The students started to protest, but Popsy raised a hand. "And I wish I was half the mentor my Daddy was. But I'd just be letting you down even more by trying to teach when I'm like this. So...yeah."
She started sliding out of the booth but Inigo grabbed her arm quickly. "Wait a sec, you can't bail on us yet!" he protested. "You might be a little rough around the edges but I still wanna learn from you! Don't you guys?"
He looked pleadingly around at the others. Slowly they voiced agreement that Popsy clearly had valuable experience to impart.
Popsy hesitated, incredibly touched that they still wanted her tutelage. But she didn't wanna get their hopes up only to let them down all over again.
"You sweet summer children, I know your hearts are in the right place," she said gravely. "And I appreciate all of you coming out and everything, really. But not even your can-do spirit's gonna overwrite the cold hard fact that I'm incapable of being a hero. And I'm one lost endorsement deal away from movin' into a cardboard box."
"We could hardly care about material wealth," Hoge pointed out reasonably. "We came here for your experience."
"Yeah, you could still have it," Yui agreed. "Even if things're messy now we could help get you back on your feet!"
Popsy felt her resistance crumbling as the students clamored eagerly, refusing to lose their chance. "Well shuck my corn, all of you are just determined to hitch your wagons to this here runaway train, ain'tcha?" She chuckled ruefully. "How'm I supposed to say no to them baby bird eyes? It was your school's mistake for even putting you up with me. They'll realize their mistake and cancel this internship any day now."
Her voice took on a bitter edge. "Can't say as I blame 'em. Not a lot of things more pitiful than a washed-up has-been tryin' to cling to her glory days when she can't even get off the couch most days without popping a painkiller. And after all that rigorous training and exams me and my classmates went through to get our licenses, I just flush it all away soon as things get a little tough?" She pounded a fist on the table vigorously.
Her face flushed with frustration. "Meanwhile you young'uns are out there chasing your dreams, bright-eyed and bushtailed, ready to take on the world!" She laughed hollowly. "And they stick you with this sorry sack of potatoes. That's funny!" Then suddenly, as if a switch flipped, she threw back her head and cackled. "I feel like I'm going crazy, man. Everything seems to jumble up in my head and before I realize it, things are different and don't make sense. You look around and what do you see? It's bird people! I tell ya. They're everywhere nowadays! All up on the news! That Fluegal villain, you believe that mess?"
She paced, gesturing wildly. "And that white-haired kid at Shiketsu! Angel boy or something?"
"That's Noah," Sally piped up, a bit confused.
"Since when are birds allowed to enroll at hero schools? It isn't just me seeing this stuff, right?" She spun to the bewildered students. "Don't even get me started on Tatarimokke and Recino."
"Who?" Yui questioned.
"Tatarimokke's her nemesis," Inigo pointed out.
Akagi kept going. "I'll at least teach you one thing before letting you go. Watch your backs at that school! And forget the rankings! It isn't about fame or glory! Do what's right, even if it means being the underdog!" She slammed both palms on the table. "The media and fat cats up top want obedient little sidekicks to push around! But true heroes stand on their own two feet! Be a real one, not another sellout," she continued her spirited tirade. "I tried fitting their mold and being popular. But look what it got me! Drinking myself stupid while my career swirls the porcelain throne!"
She collapsed back into the booth, energy spent. "Man, I miss Osaka... Things were so much simpler back at home... Man, I miss dad. Ah, sheesh. He'd be so disappointed to see how I'm doing now. He was the best hero in the world. He'd be on my tuchus about this. He was always telling me about how I could be the best, and now I've gone and just... ruined everything. Bet he would've been proud if I got teach all of you. I would've really liked to pass on his lessons and wisecracks. One time, he threw fake pirannas into the pool just so I could learn to swim faster. It was hilarious! And then another time-" She burst out laughing and then blew her nose from with colorful hankerchiefs that materialized from her pocket.
The teenagers were staring at her wide-eyed. "Aw biscuits, just...ignore my blubbering," she sniffled, wiping her eyes. "I'll call the school and tell them I'm cancelling this thing. Then you can skeddadle and find a teacher who ain't half as clowny as..."
"Um, Popsy?" Inigo interjected, pointing at her arms. "Your quirk! It came back!"
"Huh?" Popsy blinked through blurry eyes at her hands. Somehow, her arms had gone all rubbery and noodley without her even realizing, comically stretching out four feet long. She hastily reeled them back in with a wet squelching sound.
"Well slap my knee and tickle me pink!" she exclaimed. "Look at that!" A tiny flicker of hope sparked inside her. "Something you kids said must have nudged my quirk loose! "
She smacked her rubber palms decisively on the table. "Alright, new plan! I'll give this internship hippity hop a whirl! Can't make any promises of course!" She winked, giving a silly grin even as a tear trickled down her cheek. "But I'm willing to try if you are!" Her expression hardened. "It's not gonna be easy! To prove you got what it takes, you're all gonna have to pass a test first!" She leaned in with an ominous grin. "So...who's up for a challenge?"
IV. Abandoned Warehouse
"Alrighty kids, welcome to Popsy's Traveling Carnival of Laughter!" the clown hero announced with a dramatic flourish of her arms, her colorful hero costume shining in the light. "Least that was the plan, before the sponsorship money ran dry and we hauled all of this in here."
The students, also in their hero costumes, peered around the dilapidated warehouse filled with rows of covered up rides and attractions. Hoge furrowed her brow skeptically.
"More like a junkyard if you ask me," Sally muttered.
Popsy clicked her tongue. "Now don't go judging things before you've given them a chance! This warehouse may look a little worn down, but it's got everything we need for today's lesson."
"And what lesson is that?" Inigo asked eagerly. Gigan hovered next to him writing notes on a small green textbook.
Popsy grinned. "Why, the best kinda lesson there is! The hands-on, trial-by-fire kinda lesson!" She marched over to a nearby power box, her red nose gleaming. "Alright my little proteges! I can't take you on if you don't prove you've got the right stuff."
She flashed them a dazzling grin and threw the switch with a dramatic flair. "So let's put your skills to the test with a game of tag, shall we?"
At her grand gesture, the abandoned carnival roared to life. Lights flashed, rides whirred, calliope music blared an off-key tune. The abandoned carnival attractions created a maze of multi-colored chaos. A towering ferris wheel lit up in a rainbow of neon. Teacups began spinning and wandering animatronics came to life. Even a small train chugged past on its tracks.
Hoge watched the train zip by, inquistively. "You want us...to play tag?"
"Not just any tag!" Popsy declared, bouncing on her heels. "Endurance tag! To win, you must catch your dear teacher before..." She gestured skyward with a ta-da! "...the last grains fall in that big hourglass!"
The students followed her finger to see an enormous hourglass suspended overhead, sand twinkling as it trickled down.
"You have precisely twenty minutes by my watch," Popsy explained, checking a comically oversized pocket watch. She waggled a finger at Chihiro and Sally. "And no damaging or messing with the attractions, if you'd be so kind! Wouldn't want to upset the safety inspectors."
"You got it," Yui smiled. "But I'm still gonna catch you, Popsy-san."
"That's the spirit!" Popsy cheered. "Now then my pupils..." She struck a silly pose. A rubbery arm suddenly stretched out and slapped Chihiro soundly on the shoulder.
"Tag! You're it!"
Carnival music blasted loudly around them.
Name:「Popsy」
Quirk:「Funny Business」
Type: Emitter
Description: Popsy is a lot like a cartoon character in how their quirk works. Her body can be squished and crushed with minimal damage done to them in one moment, or turns as hard as steel the next. She can create objects from nowhere, like balls, mallets, etc. But she can't use her quirk in boring ways. If she's going to become like rubber or steel or create an object, it has to be when it's comedically appropriate. (It's basically Toon Force!)
She honked a bicycle horn and sprang away in a blur of rubbery limbs. Music swelled dramatically as the chaotic game commenced! Before any of them could react, Popsy was already a good distance away, her body going loose and flexible as she dodged between rides with acrobatic flips and stretches.
"Alright, let's go team!" Inigo whooped eagerly and took off after her in his winged armor. The other students quickly scrambled to join in pursuit. Chaos ensued inside the carnival warehouse as Popsy led her potential proteges on a wild chase. She wove and bounced around attractions with the energy of a pinball, always staying one squishy stretch ahead of grasping hands.
Sally leaped on top of fortune telling machine and aimed. "I think... I can get her from here." She watched Popsy bounce in and out of her sights as she aimed her gun. Sally fired off a volley of rubber bullets to cut off Popsy, only for them to bounce off clown's similarly rubbery hide and break a nearby cotton-candy machine.
Popsy clicked her tongue. "Do be careful dear! We have a deposit on the rides! That's one warning!" She bounced away, cackling as a flustered Yui tried to wrap her in thread.
"Nice shooting!" Inigo grinned and rushed passed Sally. Hoge shot her a look of disapproval before disappearing. "Please don't cause us to fail, McCathy."
Sally growled, "What the heck am I supposed to do? She's too fast." Chihiro patted her shoulder from behind. "Don't give up."
"Slow down kid!" Popsy called back to a determined Inigo, flying after her. "You gotta pace yourself! Burn too fast and you'll tire out!"
Inigo zipped through the chaotic carnival, nimbly dodging items from Popsy's quirk. Rubber pianos, safes, and dive-bombing kitchen sinks trailed behind her as she ran. "This is awesome! It's like watching one of her anniversary features live!" Inigo declared. "Wait- this is live!"
Up ahead, Popsy paused to blow a silly raspberry. "Nyah nyah, ya wedge-heads! Couldn't catch a cold!" She laughed giddily and took out a toy soldier's hat.
Popsy paused and gave him a distinct salute. Inigo braced himself. He studied Popsy's tapes. He knew her moves. It was up to him to win them their first challenge! That's it! She was about to do her Nutcracker Special. He weaved past a parade of toy soldiers bursting out of the clown.
Popsy blinked in surprise. How'd the boy get through all her toys?
Inigo grinned. I know you haven't been feeling well, Gigan. But give me a boost! Inigo's wings enlarged and he shot forward. He reached to tag her!
But almost immediately, he felt Gigan's movements turn jerky and erratic. "Woah, take it easy!" Inigo yelped as his wings spun him in dizzying circles. He caught a glimpse of Popsy's colorful form bouncing ahead and tried to steer them after her.
"Dead ahead. C'mon!" Inigo urged. With a lurch, Gigan complied, shooting them rapidly forward. Too rapidly! "Slow down!" Inigo yelled, but Gigan only accelerated more. "Too fast!" Inigo shouted in dismay as they rocketed straight toward a giant duck animatronic. He braced for impact, but suddenly the wings folded weirdly inwards, dropping them short. Inigo faceplanted directly into a slimed-filled dunk tank with a tremendous SPLAT.
"Owww..." Inigo sat up gingerly, covered head to toe in green goo. Gigan warbled apologies, tendrils flailing every which way. What was going on with his quirk?
Popsy danced over, casually balancing on a beach ball. "Took a wrong turn at the Milky Way, huh space ranger?" She squinted at the bedraggled boy. "I know your file said you had issues controlling your quirk. But I figured you'd have better handle on your creature by now!"
Inigo shook his head, trying to restrain Gigan's squirming form. "No no, this isn't normal! Gigan was doing great until the provisional exams!" More spiny growths bulged out erratically, nearly spearing Popsy if she didn't comically flatten away in time. "Something happened and now I can barely control him! It's like he's stuck in overdrive."
Popsy's eyes softened with understanding. "Aw, poor little nipper's all overwhelmed, huh?" She gently poked one frenzied tendril back down. "Got yer wires all crossed up by the stressful test?"
She casually lassoed Gigan's wilder appendages. " Don'tcha worry! Popsy's seen her fair share of unbroken stallions!" With expert tugs, she neatly hogtied the flailing mass. "There! All tied up neat as my aunt Tibby's fruitcake!"
Inigo sighed, arms pinned by his own quirk but smiling gratefully. "Thanks Popsy! But I haven't given up yet." He struggled.
"Keep at it!" She winked, playfully flicking a glob of green slime off his nose. She turned around and saw Chihiro and Yui dashing towards her. "Welp, I better run!"
Yui and Chihiro were faring little better than Inigo in chasing the fever dream that was Popsy. Popsy was in her element in this carnival setting. Chihiro stopped to help Inigo, while Yui pressed on.
The white-haired deliquent snarled in fury as her threads met only air yet again. No matter how she attacked, Popsy dodged her assaults with infuriating ease, all while keeping up cheery commentary like a tour guide.
"If you look to your left folks, you'll see our lovely Tunnel of Love!" Popsy announced, splatting herself paper-thin to slide innocuously between the spinning cups as Yui dove past. "Great spot to snuggle that special someone! Do you have a special someone, Sagara?"
She honked Yui's nose playfully as she passed. "Course with that temper, you might scare 'em off!" Laughing merrily, she stretched up to walk casually along the safety bar of the tilt-a-whirl.
"Over here's the famous Zero Gravity ride! I'd offer you a spin but it seems you're already having trouble keeping your feet on the ground!"
Yui grumbled, face red as she stumbled to keep pace. "That's it! Hold! Still!" She flung more threads but Popsy casually compressed herself into a bowling ball, letting the strings whiff over her smooth surface so Yui only snatched back a tangled bird's nest. "Damn it!" Yui cursed.
"Hey! This is a family show. Gotta keep this squeaky clean!" Popsy chided, re-inflating with a raspberry sound.
Yui growled, swinging another wild punch at the slippery clown.
"Careful this ride's a rental!" Straightening back up with a boing, Popsy fixed the fuming girl with a sympathetic look. "I know you've struggled with that temper ever since those rogue villain days."
She gave Yui's shoulder a supportive pat even as she stretched easily out of reach of another grab attempt. "But putting up walls and lashing out will only trap you further!"
Popsy winked, casually walking up a tilt-a-whirl wall. "Stay positive and roll with life's tumbles! That's the key!" She tapped a gloved finger to her chin thoughtfully. She stretched out two giant foam fingers, waving #1 signs. "Stay positive! You'll tag me yet, slugger!"
Yui watched in dismay as Popsy bounced tauntingly out of reach once more.
Nearby, Hoge was having her own troubles keeping eyes on the elusive clown. No matter how she tried to track Popsy's chaotic movements, she kept losing sight of her quarry, but the determined girl stalked quietly. She climbed up the mini-train looping around the carnival rides and waited for her chance while glancing anxiously at the hourglass above them. Only fifteen minutes left.
Hoge watched as Chihiro chased after Popsy. Chihiro's quirk empowered her speed as she dashed from one ride to the other, trying to match speed with Popsy. As Popsy's frantic movement paused, Chihiro flashed forward, reaching with her sword to tap her new sensei. The burst of speed surprised even the pro-hero, nearly catching Popsy offguard if she didn't flatten herself into a flat puddle just as Chihiro got close. "Woops, looks like I took a spill."
Chihiro yelped in surprise, reflexively lashing out, but only grasped at the air where Popsy had just been. She was already flipping away, chortling gleefully into a House of Mirrors.
"You're fast, Miss Mitsurugi! But you gotta work on what to do with all that speed!" Popsy trilled, poking her head briefly out from the spinning House of Mirrors.
With a determined huff, Chihiro zipped inside after her...and skidded to an astonished halt at the infinite reflections surrounding her.
"Well hi there!" Countless identical Popsys curtsied in greeting. "Welcome to the Kaleidoscope Cave!"
"Hello sensei," Chihiro bowed in return.
Chihiro reached out. But the mirrors merely produced endless copies of herself alongside the multiplying clowns.
Popsy's giggles echoed cacophonously around her as she ran back. "You found the secret village! But which wacky weirdo is the real me?"
Chihiro wandered the House of Mirrors. Grasping wildly at false reflections. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, focusing on Popsy's breath. She extended her aura and focused on detecting the life force around her. Multi-colored swirls emerged from the darkness. There. The real one!
With a burst of speed she unsheathed her sword and swung with the blunt side only to find that her sword's been replaced with a balloon version. Its reach ending just a few inches away from a tilting Popsy.
"Found me! But what do you if your sword can't cut it?"
Chihiro stepped and hurriedly reached out but Popsy slipped back into the maze.
"That was too close! I think you need some time to reflect!" Popsy leaped out of the House of Mirrors as more mirror walls materialized, sealing in Chihiro. Unable to destroy the walls without breaking the rules, Chihiro sighed and waited.
With her quirk in full blast, Hoge stalked silently through the chaotic carnival, peering intently past whirling rides and flashing lights for any glimpse of their elusive target. Spotting a flash of color near the carousel, Hoge hopped off the train and landed into a roll without making a sound. She crept closer, footsteps muffled by the blaring calliope music.
Spotting the mentor lounging on the carousel, cotton candy staining her gloves, Hoge wrinkled her nose in judgment. Honestly, the woman behaved as a child herself, oblivious to indignity. Her quirk might be back for now, but she's only way slip away from abandoning them again. Hoge slipped stealthily onto the carousel, maneuvering opposite her target. She leaped from one painted creature to the other. It was a maneuver that she's done before.
Slipping opposite Popsy, Hoge waited for an opening, muscles coiled. There! As the clown laughed uproariously at some private joke, threatening to topple from her steed. Hoge sprang forward to tag her crumpled sleeve.
"I got you," Hoge declared, allowing her quirk to reveal her.
But to her bewilderment, the Popsy she'd tagged simply deflated with a rude noise, revealing itself as just a balloon copy. Hoge whirled around in dismay.
"Yoo-hoo! Up here!" called Popsy's cheerful voice.
Hoge looked up to see the actual Popsy perched atop the carousel's striped canopy, blowing a noisemaker.
"Nice try kiddo! You were this close!" Popsy held her fingers barely apart. "But ya gotta commit to the bit! No time for hesitation!"
She flipped down, waggling a scolding finger. "I know self-doubt when I see it, missy. Believe me, Ol' Popsy's no stranger to the confidence monster nibbling away."
Hoge bristled at the playful scolding about hesitation and confidence. This irresponsible clown thought herself qualified to mentor anyone?
"But watch out! That monster's gotta big ol' appetite if ya let 'im!" Popsy winked. "Lucky for you, clowns taste terrible! All rubbery and tough."
"With respect, I hardly require counseling from an intoxicated failure," Hoge retorted bluntly. "Your career lies in shambles because you lack self-discipline and dignity. Perhaps address your own glaring flaws before critiquing mine."
"Uwaaa! You are a mean rude little boy or girl, huh? I'll never let you catch me!" Popsy blew a raspberry and sprung away from the carousel ride.
Hoge ignored Popsy’s outburst, choosing to fade into Wasuremono as Popsy fled. Shame and anger simmered within Hoge as she resumed the pursuit. She must catch this clown and demand she take her role as mentor seriously.
Within fifteen minutes, all five students were properly exhausted from their relentless efforts, without anyone having laid so much as a finger on Popsy. The clown was clearly in her element, bouncing around like she hadn't exerted herself whatsoever.
"C'mon kids, step it up!" She crowed, springing up to balance perfectly on top of a tilting funhouse barrel. "Only five minutes left!"
The students regrouped, panting.
"This is impossible!" Sally wheezed in dismay. "She's too fast!"
"We can't catch her alone..." Inigo mused. "But together, we might stand a chance!"
Hoge nodded, pushing her glasses up her sweat-slick nose. "If we coordinate properly, we can corner her."
"Sounds good to me," Yui agreed.
Chihiro leaned close. "Does anyone have a plan?"
They quickly hashed one out, then fanned out again, this time working in tandem. Inigo grinned. "Alright team, it's time for an all-out attack! Hit her with everything we've got!" They broke and moved into position surrounding the clown. As Popsy stood at the base of a ferris wheel, Yui burst forward, flinging out crackling crimson threads to block a path. The strands stretched into a wide barrier intimidating even Popsy.
"Try getting past this!" Yui yelled.
Popsy rebounded only for Sally to open fire with a stream rubber bullets to cut off her escape route from the air. "I got her covered!"
Inigo sent Gigan jetting out in wildly grasping tendrils. "Hold still!" The armor creature snared Popsy mid-spin, reeling the struggling clown in. Inigo cheered. "Gotcha now!" But then Gigan suddenly convulsed, losing his grip on their slippery target! Popsy squirmed free, springing rapidly and running up the ferris wheel, bounding from one car to another. "Nice teamwork!"
As Inigo scrambled after her, Hoge jumped from her position, blurring forward unseen to intercept the capering clown. She appeared swiftly swinging a giant butterfly net made by Yui's esoteric threads.
"She's caught," Hoge declared.
Popsy squirmed within the mesh enclosure. "No fair using props!"
Before she could escape, Chihiro flashed in, zipping through the Ferris wheel carts.
"I have you, sensei!" Chihiro called out, reaching out to finally tag the trapped clown!
BUZZZZZ!
A loud buzzer rang out. The students froze, heads looking up. The net around Popsy fell off her. The students groaned as she bounced up to perch casually atop the hourglass itself.
"Welp, time's up kids! Ya gave it a good try I'll give ya that. But in the end..." She shrugged. "Ya failed! Soooo..."
The students looked up at her nervously, worried that this spelled the end for their internships before they'd properly begun.
"I'll be right back!" Popsy declared. With that, she dove off the canopy and out of sight.
The students milled anxiously.
"Does this mean we're done here?" Yui finally asked.
"Guess so," Inigo furrowed his brow. "Sorry guys."
A quiet flump behind them made them all whirl around. Popsy stood there, regarding them seriously...
...holding a big chest covered in pictures of clowns and juggling pins.
Seeing their puzzled faces, her serious facade cracked and she broke into laughter instead.
"I've decided to give ya rapscallions another chance! Ya failed to catch me this time, but that just means we gotta keep on trying!"
Inigo let out a whoop of delight that quickly gave way to chuckles. "Alright!" For a moment they all just shared relieved looks and smiles.
"No promises I won't still kick all of you out on your cabooses tomorrow," Popsy added, plopping the big box down and flipping the lid open dramatically. "But fer now...it's time for a crash course in clown college and we gotta get ye ready for your clown make-overs!" The box turned out to be brimming with disguises, greasepaints, props, and noisemakers. Popsy fished out a bulbous red nose and held it up proudly.
"But first- we should stop by the store for some more cleaning supplies. We got a LOT of prep to get my lil' apartment ready."
Chapter 4: Popsy's Apartment
Inigo hauled another bulging trash bag out of Popsy's cluttered apartment. The other students were still hard at work inside, tackling the monumental cleaning task their eccentric teacher had set them. As Inigo lugged the bag down the hallway to the bins, he spotted Hoge standing stiffly by the window, looking perturbed. She had slipped outside a few minutes earlier.
Inigo smiled to himself. He quickly sidled up beside her. "Coru-chan," he said, bumping her playfully. "Needed a breather from Hurricane Popsy too huh?"
Hoge smiled up at him, the city's neon glow reflected in her eyes which caused Inigo's heart to flutter.
"It's quite...stimulating in there," Hoge huffed, nose wrinkled. "We will have to teach her how to be more organized."
Inigo laughed. "For real! It's kinda scary how deep some of those trash piles went. Poor Sally is gonna have a panic attack if she sees one more stray jack-in-the-box!"
Hoge shook her head, appalled. "That woman lives in squalor. How does she function in such disorder?"
Inigo laughed again. "You still look cute when you're judgy." He watched her bite her lip. Was she restraining herself from saying more about Popsy?
"So, whatcha looking at out here?" he asked, leaning on the window sill beside her.
"It's nothing much. I'm enjoying the ambience," Hoge murmured. She nodded at the vibrant, bustling city below. "I'm waiting for the moon to reflect fully over the river."
Inigo admired the way the city lights cast a soft glow on her features. Unable to resist, he reached out and tenderly tucked a lock of hair behind her ear.
"It can't be as lovely as you," he said, his voice low.
Hoge flushed, averting her gaze demurely even as she leaned into his touch. Inigo felt his pulse quicken being so close to her, reminding him of stolen moments up on the school away from prying eyes. He glanced down the empty hallway. They were completely alone out here...
Unable to stop himself, Inigo gently cupped her cheek and turned her face towards his. Her lips parted slightly in anticipation as he leaned in. But Hoge placed a halting hand on his chest. Inigo froze, confused. "W-we shouldn't," Hoge whispered reluctantly. "The others could come out any moment."
Inigo smiled wryly. "C'mon, just a quickie. They're gonna be scrubbing trash piles for a while."
He tried to close the gap between them again but Hoge held firm, shaking her head. "Need I remind you this is a school-sponsored internship program? We have certain expectations to uphold."
"Pffft, it's Popsy!" Inigo retorted with a careless wave. "You really think she's gonna write us up for snogging on the clock?"
"That's not the point," Hoge huffed. "I gave my word that I would take this seriously. We all did. I can't go back on that just to-"
He leaned in with a roguish grin. "What if we sneak out tonight? We can go to that place you wanted to investigate."
Hoge blushed but held his gaze boldly. "We shall see," she murmured back. "I may require...convincing."
"Challenge accepted!" Inigo declared. Still smirking, Inigo let his bag thud to the floor and braced one hand on the wall, pinning Hoge lightly against the chute door.
"Although, a quick pre-convincing makeout sesh couldn't hurt...?" he teased, lips hovering temptingly over hers. Hoge's protest died on her lips as his mouth claimed hers. Her fingers dug into his shoulders, the trash bag tumbling forgotten from her grip. Just as Inigo was getting into it, the apartment door banged open loudly behind them.
"AHA!" Popsy bellowed, making them spring apart. "I know a pair of twitterpated lovebirds when I see 'em!"
Inigo whirled around, face flaming. "P-Popsy-sensei! We were just, uh..."
Hoge sighed, flushing as she turned her attention to Popsy, her expression annoyed.
Popsy planted her fists on her hips, glaring sternly.
"As your teacher I got a duty to nurture budding talents, not budding romance!" She wagged a finger at them. "I'm gonna have to stick you two in different corners for the whole month!"
Inigo immediately protested. "No! Don't do that! We're working hard, I swear!" He grabbed Hoge's hand supportively. "Right? She just took a tumble and I caught her."
Hoge paused guiltily, "We were just-"
Another voice piped up behind them from the stairs.
"They were doing unearthly things, sensei!"
Kaga, a short babyfaced boy, appeared at the top of the stairs, scowling down at them. "Unearthly things!"
"Can it kid, nobody likes a tattletale! And who in the blazes are you?" Popsy pointed.
"It's Kaga! Your intern! I've been here for a week!"
"Oh yeah!" She ran her finger through her hair.
"I thought you were a delivery boy. What was your hero name again? Punch Lord or something, right? It was good. Loved it. Can't remember it for the life of me."
"It's Fight Man, ma'am!"
"Fight Guy... it's even better than I remember. Real old school kind of style."
"It's FIGHT Man!" Kaga insisted, jogging down the stairs toward them.
"Really, what'd I say?"
As Popsy scratched her head, loud chaos poured through the open apartment door. The contents of Popsy's filled-to-the-brim closet fell all over Sally and Yui with a loud clatter as they cleaned. Chihiro wandered tipsily past the door clutching an empty bottle.
Hic!
"Sen-shei.. Why'shhh the room shpinning?" she slurred before stumbling towards Popsy.
Inigo and Hoge exchanged startled looks. "Oh biscuits!" Popsy yelped, smacking her forehead with her palm. "I just told her to empty that bottle, not drink it!"
The normally reserved girl blinked blearily. "S-so this is wha's it feels like bein' you alll th' time, sen-shei?" she slurred at Popsy.
Inigo scratched his head. "Uh, maybe we should get her some water or something?" Hoge shot a look of disgust at Popsy and moved to help Chihiro.
BOOOM!
"HIT THE DECK!" Sally yelled, having accidentally discharged the gun barrel from her palm into Popsy's wall. Drywall and window glass crashed to the floor.
"Stupid jack-in-the-box!"
Outside, a car alarm began blaring loudly.
An angry shout came from below.
"My car! What's goin' on up there?!"
"Sorry!" Sally shouted at the man outside.
"You idiot!"
Yui stomped over to the broken window and stuck her head out.
"Hey, she said she was sorry, you asshole!" she hollered back.
"You're in big trouble, you stupid little girls!"
"Don't talk to her like that!" Sally joined Yui.
"What are you gonna do shoot me!?"
Hoge cringed. So much for diplomacy.
Meanwhile the enraged stranger wasn't backing down.
"Why I oughta come up there and teach you spoiled dumb brats a lesson!" he bellowed, shaking his fist.
Yui cracked her knuckles, red threads shimmering around her. "I'd like ta see ya try, creep!"
Sensing imminent disaster at Yui's angry tabby cat expression, Inigo leapt forward and grabbed her before she could dive out the window.
"Whoaaa let's not fight civilians now!" he hissed urgently. Gigan mewed in agreement.
Hoge hurried over to help restrain the feisty delinquent. But Yui shoved them both off, stomping for the door.
"Outta my way! Imma go beat some manners into that loudmouth!"
Inigo and Hoge blocked her path. Behind them, Popsy was still trying to wrangle a thoroughly tipsy Chihiro while Sally waved her arm cannon around arguing it was all "a big misunderstanding!" Kaga stood watching everything unfold.
"C'mon kids, let's dial it back!" Popsy bellowed finally. "-and help me sober up our soused sword master!"
With Sally muttering darkly, Inigo herded a still-belligerent Yui away from the door. Hoge retrieved the water glass and tried coaxing Chihiro to drink. Kaga happily darted about trying to "help." And somehow amidst the chaos, Inigo felt happier than he had in ages. Inigo's grin met Hoge's eyes across the chaotic room. Sneaking a wink, he knew without doubt that this would be the best internship ever.
random ED: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F64yFFnZfkI
