Me and Charlie's been walking for half a day not. The damn buggie wheel fell off just as we hit the crater. I told Charlie we needed to slow down. The bugger was so obsessed with drivin' home he forgot to slow down on the hill. Now we're walkin'. "Sanana..." Charlie gasped. "When I get home, Mac, the first thing I'm gonna do is chug a couple of Fosties and find a whore." I huff for a moment. "A whore?" Charlie growls. "You bloody damn know she's a whore. Those goddamn squirrels kept shoving their arses in my face wanting to nut. I thought they wanted acorns or my handie game. Bloody squirrels wanted to be nutted. Fukken nutty nutters they are." Charlie and I climb a hill. We see the station in the distance. Its a good sunny day even though its still bloody cold. "Well looka thah'." Charlie says. "They finally got the station out of the hole didn' they?" "Yeah," I say. Its a welcome sight seeing the station bloom like a bottlebrush. I notice everyone's busy around the station in camps and tents. "Hell yeah. Looks like a barbie and a party!" Charlie was about to tumble downhill but I grabbed his suit. "Look mate, you know the rules." Charlie sighs. "I know, I know, Mac. Business before pleasure. I've done this for years now. But sometimes you gotta sneak a snack every now and then to keep you sane. Come on! Let's eat."

The smell of food is enough to put a spring in our step. Charlie and I make our way down the hill to the camps. There the cooks are preparing rations for all the workers. Something seems... Off. "Notice something mate?" I ask Charlie. Charlie was busy waving at the Sanalites who see us approach the line. "So they wanted to try rustic outdoor cooking for once. So what?"

"That's the problem," I say. "Why are we cooking outdoors on a campfire when we have plenty o' kitchens in the station?"

"That a question alright," says Charlie. "Why don't I connect to the message boards and..." Charlie takes out his tablet. He whacks it for a moment. "That's strange. The service is shut down."

"Shut down?" I ask.

"Not under maintenance either," Charlie says. "As in all internet is shut down. Bloody hell. That means I'll have to file paperwork the ol' fashioned way."

"So much for a lady of the night."

Charlie and I grab ourselves some grub in the sealed tent. I passed on the beer. Beef pot roast with taters, carrots, and peas might be British but it was welcomed over the last few weeks of eating MREs. We imported the beef from /who/ to freeze it for the winter. But the freezers are offline because the station is in emergency shutdown. From what I gather /nasa/ has ordered itself to lock down for the Grand Directive because our dumbass principal let some native into his bed chamber. "So I leave the station for a bloody month and the old kangaroos get into a scrap shutting the entire place down?" I ask the cook as I take a swig of water. "Yeah, that's the long and short of ih," he says. "And now the police general's stagin' a manhunt to fine the prince and his mastah code to bring the station in ordah."

"Bloody hell, Alex."

I finish my food and water. "Then I have no time to lose. I better report my findings to the station before things get worse." I find Charlie who's flirting with a couple of girls on his lap. I grab Charlie. "Oi! Mate! Wha'dya doin'!?" I shoo the ladies off Charlie's lap. "Apologies ladies, but I need to borrow this bugger for a while. Charlie, get your helmet on. We're going to the station." “Ah come on!” Charlie complains. “I haven't even finished tellin' my stories.” I put my helmet back on. “No time to waste, Charlie. Things will get worse if we don't do something about it now.” Charlie sighs. He grabs his helmet. “Oi, oi...”

Charlie and I arrive at the station. We climb the frozen escalators from the base of the ship's feet about two stories. Charlie and I arrive at a wall. We fumble around for a good five minutes or so.

"Oi, Charlie"
"Wot"
"Where's the bloody door to the get in the station?"
"Bugger me it's right there, mate"
"Then open the airlock"
"....oh. I see the problem..."
"Oh do you, you drongo!"

Charlie grabs my helmet and bends me over. The latch is tilted, or I should say back to its original orientation. I growl. “Don't I feel like an idiot.” Charlie laughs his arse off. “Not used to seeing the station under gravity are ya?” Before I can slide my ID card the the airlock opens. Immediately we're greeted by police units pointing forks at us. “This is a restricted area!” I step back raising my hands. Charlie's shaking in his boots. So I hit his shoulder. Charlie raises his hands too. The police pat us down. “My name is Colonel Mac Acres,” I speak. “My partner Charles Dickson and I have returned from an exploration mission to scout the planet's inhabitants.” The police check my weapons, a pistol and a rifle. They also check my backpack. Inside is a frame of a robot skeleton. “That is Wheaty. He served us well on our journey. He'll need to be baked again soon.” “Yeah yeah, shut it,” says the officer. He looks at my ID card, which is a thin device with a screen on it. “ID checks out.” The officer returns my card. “Just so you know your boss is not in the station. We don't know where he is.” The officer gets a radio transmission. “Well you're in luck. The general wants to see you. You're coming with us whether you want to or not.”

Charlie and I are politely escorted to the brig. And by politely exported I mean poked by forks if we're too slow. We're thrown into the interrogator's room where General Johnathan Marshal is waiting. “I've been expecting your return,” he says. Charlie and I quickly find our seats. Charlie yells “what in blazes is goin' on here!? Mutiny? Lockdowns? I was expecting a good beer, women, and bed on my return not bloody jail.” “Apologies, Charles.” General Jonny stands up. “But in the name of the grand directive our principal has left us in an unreasonable state.” Charlie scratches his head. “To me it looks like you're having a outdoor barbecue,” he says. “Which doesn't seem too bad.” General Jonny sighs. “If only you knew how bad things have gotten. As you may have heard the principal has lost his court case amending the Grand Directive.” I kick my feet up. “Can't say I didn't expect it. Though I understand the directive is a guideline rather than absolute law. There is a homeworld clause in the directive. I assume that was what he's tried to enforce?” Jonny paces around the room. “Yes and no. See the homeworld clause is only allowed when we know absolutely that there is no way we're getting off of this rock. According to our estimations if we're lucky we only need at minimum of ninety-nine years to repair the station and return to space. Last we checked that is not forever. Therefore the Grand Directive remains absolute.”

“I see.”

Jonny sits back down. “Rather than accept his loss of control the principal instead betrays /nasa/. He orders an absolute shut down of all non-essential systems to the station. He claims that humans are too stupid to not share technology so we shouldn't have any?” General Jonny slams his fist into the table. “The nerve of that madman!? Does he not realize by locking /nasa/ out of its infrastructure he's set back the repair date of the station? Life was hard enough as is with infrastructure. Without it, he's condemned the life of all Sanalites on this station to poverty. Which will in fact result in death of many Sanalites as they can't get the care that they need?” I sit up. “Last I checked medical is an essential system. Clearly he didn't lock you out of everything did he?” Jonny growls. “He was kind enough to leave us medical, light, rations, and hand tools.” I stand up. “Sounds like what the Principal is trying to do is teach us all a lesson. He's enforcing the Grand Directive to its absolute conclusion based on what the courts rule.” Jonny stands up. “His actions have driven /nasa/ into chaos and disorder. The looting of /nasa/'s electronics is a direct response to the lack of security. Which is his fault. The man will answer for his crimes. Even if it means the end of his life.” I shrug. “Alright then general. The principal will answer for his crimes but you have to let me talk to him first.” Jonny bends over putting his hands on the table and looks at me dead in the eye. “Do I now? It sounds like you're sympathizing with him.” I bend over the table as well. Charlie whispers to me, “oi mate! Ya tryin' to get us killed?” I raise my hand. “I have a report to file to the principal. There are other advanced civilizations on this planet.” Jonny cocks an eyebrow. “You don't say?” I straighten out myself. “I do say, general. And when the principal reviews my report he'll have no choice but to lift the lockdown.” Jonny straightens himself as well. “And if he does not listen to you. What if he keeps the station locked down?” I point my finger like a gun. “Then I'll deal with him myself. If he's truly gone mad then I'll see it. And I will put him down.” Jonny growls. “We have no idea where the principal is. I've already sent a manhunt to find him. If you are fortunate enough to encounter him before we do. Then you can try to talk to him. But know this.” Jonny grabs my spacesuit and pulls me. Charlie wails a nervous “uuuh”. “If you dare choose his side,” General Jonny warns. “Then you will be branded a traitor like him. And I will use all my power to destroy you as well.” I give Jonny a smirk. “You have my word, general.”

Jonny releases me. “Very well. I will allow you to hunt the principal. But also know that you won't have support from me. You are to approach the principal on your own affair.” I rub the back of my neck. “That's why I've returned to /nasa/. My business is between me and him.” General Jonny sits down in his chair. “Then I trust you to know what to do when the time comes.” I take a deep breath. “C'mon Charlie. We got a report to file.” Charlie gets up quickly. “Y-yes sir!” He salutes with a fist on his chest. I grab his hand. “Knock it off you fool. You're not an officer. Let's go.” Charlier and I leave the interrogation room. But I can't help but notice Johnathan talking to his officers before the door shuts. “I'm guessing we're not going to get any shut eye tonight?” Charlie asks. “No,” I say to him. “We're not sleeping until we find the principal. I don't know why. But I have this feeling that somethings going down if we don't.” Charlie grumbles. “At least let me have another beer before we hunt him down.” I laugh. “I'm going to need a beer myself. Normally I'd have a frappe but those are off the menu tonight.“ Charlie and I make our way back to camp. We're going to ask the locals around to see if they know anything. I really need to find Alex and soon.

---End