Chapter 6
“...I-I’m very sorry, Bill”, a timid white bird apologizes.
Located on one of the more spacious rooms of the second floor, the humble “library” at the guild barely boasts enough used tomes and handbooks in order to be named as such. The potent imprinted scents on them are a dead giveaway of them being quite worn and second-hand. Logically speaking, Bill wonders, a couple-months-old residence can’t simply possess the widest catalog of written works to choose from, anyway.
None of that mattered, however—so long as there was valuable information to be found on these texts (“who writes these anyway?”), this place was as good a start as any. Having left Gill to wander off on his own in order to check out the rest of the guild, Bill still had his main objective in mind:
Seek a way out of this nightmare.
(“Library? Is someone in charge of it?”)
(“Um, Booker? Nah, I’m just being stupid. Macom? He’s got his own place… the, er, quartermaster maybe? Yeah, probably. He’s a human too, by the way.”)
Indeed, he found the so-called quartermaster in the library not too long ago: a white avian-like with a big head and colored patterns all over his small round body. Of all the animals Bill can think of, a dog-sized, beakless heron hatchling is the closest comparison that comes to mind, even if it clearly isn’t the most accurate assessment—among a number of differences from his possible real-life analog, the bird possesses short, digitless arms beside his folded wings. He also smells particularly nice and flowery, for some reason.
Adapting to his species’ name like many humans before him, Togetic is certainly a character in his own right. Though he doesn’t possess a temperament and demeanor that Bill hadn’t already known of beforehand: noticeable speech impediment, overtly bashful personality, tendency to randomly fixate on particular topics, showcasing clear repetitive behaviors in his body language…
…on second thought, calling this person a “character” seemed too demeaning a description for him. At least that’s how Bill thinks so—he made sure to make a mental note for future reference as the white bird browsed through the shelves, skimming over texts with practiced ease…
…only for the growlithe to be eventually shut down by the unfortunately expected answer. It’s almost as if Togetic had been holding it back this entire time out of some semblance of politeness:
“Y-You’re not the only one who’s been trying to go back,” the white avian resumes. “E-Even in Capim’s library, there’s barely anything on the matter. A-And outside of the well-known cases of humans coming to this world, th-there’s no real… common thread between these and our situation. N-Not that we know right now, anyway.”
“Are you sure?” Bill asks, seated at one of the tables nearby.
“W-Well, I suppose so,” Togetic stutters as he flicks his wings slightly, as if trying to dust them off. “L-Like I said… th-there is usually some sort of bigger purpose to a human’s arrival according to the games—u-uh, general folklore and p-personal accounts, that is. But w-we’ve yet to… well… know that purpose ourselves, i-if it ever comes to that. Personally, I-I’ve… been stuck here for a while and I’ve yet to make heads or tails as to why that is… I don’t t-think anyone knows, to be honest…”
Bill sighs.
Every time he so much as glances at the problem it turns even more hopeless. Even when going as far as trusting the lore behind the video games he played as a kid, the answers continue to elude him. Is he really going to look towards some sort of higher purpose ordained by God-knows-who in order to get out of this bind? How the hell has he been transformed into an animal? Let alone one that shouldn’t even exist? Why are so many people here not as outwardly vocal about this? Have they all already silently accepted their fate, knowing that they’re forever cast aside from their friends and family, never to return to the real world?
What the hell has become of his life?
“U-Uh, Bill?”, Togetic interrupts his train of thought, looking concerned. “I-I truly am sorry for you, I-I wish I could be of more use. W-Well, there’s one thing we haven’t tried—”
Bill’s eyes light up. His tail even flickers slightly in spite of his better attempts to suppress the instinct.
Is there hope after all?
“Come again?” Bill speaks.
“Um… well…”
Togetic looks away, putting one of his hands to his face. No words are required for the feeling of regret to come through in his expression:
“I… don’t… w-want to give you any ideas… but… um…”
“Please,” the growlithe implores, standing on his four legs again as he carefully jumps off the short stump he’s on. “This might help us all, not just me and my brother.”
…
Togetic paces about near the shelves, looking for something.
Seconds pass before he speaks up again:
…
“Uxie.”
Togetic pulls out a giant rolled-up sheet off the shelf, unfurling it on the table.
On its tattered orange surface is a rough depiction of a large landmass, adorned with several mountains and forests alike. Other than those, many lakes, rock formations and even deserts are featured in the old map as comprehensively as possible. Flanking the island are several smaller chunks of land.
“...Uxie?” a puzzled Bill is left wondering, observing the intricate illustration on the table.
“W-We’re currently here on the Grass Continent,” Togetic asserts as his white limb touches an inlet bay on the left side of the map. “A-According to general precedent and word of mouth, Uxie’s whereabouts are… a-about here. On Fogbound Lake.”
His hand travels all the way to the right side of the island, near a strangely shaped rock formation.
“But… who’s Uxie?” Bill asks once more.
“Y-You don’t know? Uxie is a member of the lake trio presented in the Pokemon games, h-he’s the entity responsible for engendering the very concept of knowledge into the world. You see, at the universe’s birth, Arceus the Alpha Pokemon made six other entities in order to preserve and hold sway over the stability of His creation in this realm, so aside from space, time and anti-matter he also conceived all mortals with emotion, willpower and knowledge and Uxie is one of such pokemon that holds dominion over the latter and so far there hasn’t been any retcons in the mainline series which disprove anything major but the latest games seem to imply that knowledge of Uxie is not as widespread as it could be given how ancient records needed to be perused in order to gather information regarding him, so maybe it’s not something most inhabitants here know but then again we should take that with a grain of salt since it comes from the same source that says that pokemon can literally shrink in size and while that concept is very APPROPRIATE to the ORIGINAL idea of Pocket Monsters as gacha toys, that doesn’t make ANY SENSE with how later portrayals of the Pokemon world work! Do you know how USEFUL it would have been for any of us during our time here if we could’ve magically shrunk to Booker’s size on command whenever we wanted to? But no, people call me an energycuck who will never be a real woman, I’ve been told that on both /vp/ and on this very guild even though the anons here CAN’T SHRINK THEMSELVES and I DON’T WANT TO BE A REAL WOMAN! They just want to get a RISE out of me and I keep falling for it because I’m a MORON who ca—”
“OKAY, OKAY!” Bill interrupts Togetic.
The latter looks immediately apologetic as his head cranes downward. “Oh! Um… s-so yeah…”
The growlithe takes a deep breath and exhales:
“So what you’re saying is that this Uxie… pokemon might be the key to all of this. Since he might know something we don’t.”
“Y-Yes, he’s app-...” Togetic stammers. “…apparently famous for holding extensive knowledge himself…”
“That’s all I need to know, then.”
Just as Bill is about to leave and thank him for his help, he is stopped in his tracks by the bird tottering in front of him:
“Y-You can’t do that, none of us have ventured so deep i-into that part of the continent! Th-That place is no man’s land, i-it would take an experienced exploration team to be up for the t-task and… a-and the texts say that Uxie d-does not part with his knowledge easily!”
Earlier on lunch, Bill took it upon himself to gather info about what being an explorer actually entailed: mostly teams comprised of guild members trying to do all sorts of odd jobs for the local townsfolk. They vary from simple tasks to arduous endeavors only fit for the strongest among them. For a fee, one can have a group perform a simple errand or even aim for bounties placed on dangerous outlaws. If there’s anyone able to help someone sort through their problems, it would have to be an exploration team.
The unspoken rules of the land also command outrageous prices for these services, however.
On the other hand, he now knows who to seek. With some luck, he will find a way out of this mess for sure, no matter how little tenuous hope there is for this not to be a dead end.
Uxie it is, then.
“I’m not being careless, Togetic,” the growlithe lets out, still feeling extremely silly for referring to the transformed humans here by their newfound species name. “There’s no way I’m waltzing in there the first chance I get, I’m sure I’ll soon have a plan in mind once push comes to shove. It’ll take a while, but I have to do it. Don’t you want to return to the real world, anyway?”
“l… a-about that… I-I’m not… well…”
…
Given Togetic's attitude and how tense he smells, Bill decides not to press any further—the bird has been acting particularly fidgety whenever the topic shifted to that of the real world. Somehow, and very much unlike Bill, it appears like Togetic’s venture into this world hasn’t been the upheaval that it had been for the former. Despite the growlithe's first impulse to know more out of some sense of sympathy, he ultimately decides that it’s none of his business.
Wait, Togetic “smells tense”?
Well… yes, he does.
Exhaling again, Bill starts turning around. “Didn’t mean to pry. Thanks a lot for your help, in any case. I mean it.”
“S-Sure. It was nothing,” Togetic says as he rolls up the map off the table.
…
“Okey chicos, como lo ensayamos?”, a familiar voice asks outside the library, accompanied by two other ones. “Un. Dos. Tres.”
ILLEGALS IN MY YARD (dun dun dun dun dunnnn) ILLEGALS IN MY YARD (dun dun dun dun dunnnn) ILLEGALS IN MY YARD Throw them some pesos and they work so hard!
Gill loudly marches to the beat as he approaches the library, flanked by the equally loud alcoholic totodile from before and a deeply unsettling, hovering skull-shaped mask cloaked in a ghostly black garb. Well, the floating entity would look more disturbing if it wasn’t also merrily singing alongside his brother. Also, just because God thinks it's funny, it also bears no scent.
“Gill…”
They're gonna pave up my driveway this Christmas! They're gonna clean all my cars this Christmas! They're gonna shovel all the snow this Christmas! THOSE ILLEGALS IN MY YAAAA—
“GILL!”
"Bien chicos, ya ya, se nos acabó la función!" Gill announces to his two companions. "Parece que mi hermano está solo, está que tiene cara de que nadie le acompaña."
"Heh! Sure thing, Willermo!" the unnamed miniature reaper says as he finger-guns Gill with his tiny fabric arms. Inside the mask's void is an expressive red will-o-wisp that acts as his pupils. "I have to train anyhow, gotta work on my Shadow Sneak so I'm half-half-way decent in dungeons."
"And Phanpy's gonna get on my case for not running those errands before sundown!" Totodile reminds himself as he grabs his head.
"Chau Elmo! Chau Toto!"
"Bye!" the two wave in unison as they walk/hover towards the spiral staircase.
...
Gill walks towards Bill and Togetic as his big silver tail swishes side-to-side: "So... what now? Oh, hi there!"
The white avian becomes instantly apprehensive, wringing his hands as he looks away: "Hi."
Bill steps in. "Um... yeah, Togetic? This is my brother, Gill. Gill, Togetic."
"Togetic?!" Gill remarks. "You know, maybe I should call myself Growlithe to fit in with the rest!"
"Don't," his twin dryly retorts. "Let's go to Lliam's room to see where he has us set up. We need to talk soon."
"Oh well, bye Toge!" Both growlithes proceed to slowly pace about in the direction of the staircase. "I think our room should be near the Furfrou's. Us dogs have to stick together so it should be a good idea to talk with him!"
Bill sighs. "Please, don't make this any harder on me. I'm trying to ignore my body as much as I'm allowed to."
"Sorry, sorry... but I mean... back then no one but me cared about Furfrou, you know?" Gill playfully continues, as if knowingly trying to rub off his positive aura in spite of his brother. "Maybe it's just that I really like dogs. No one else cried about it when Gamefreak cut it from mainline—"
"That's not true," a timid voice interrupts.
Both turn their heads to face Togetic, who suddenly looks slightly taller.
Gill tilts his head: "Huh?"
"I-I cared a lot. A-About the whole Gen 8 thing."
"Ohhh, I know, right?!" Gill turns around completely. "It's a tired topic, I know, but it's a principle of the matter sorta dea—"
"I KNOW! People keep calling me a STANTLER APOLOGIST WHO NEEDS TO DILATE just because I DARE to keep bitching about the incompetent decision they made even though all of the mainline series games are built on the same framework, using the same rigging and using the same models, if they have those assets future-proofed then why aren't they implementing basic compatibility features across games?! Ever since they've done that there has been nothing to merit such a—"
"Oh my God," Bill thinks in horror. "Togetic, we'll have to—"
"Of course!" Gill continues. "I'd understand it if they kept increasing the creative scope of their games, in that sense it'd be perfectly reasonable for them to not be reusing every single asset since that would be unfeasible, yeah, but that's not what's happening and it's been generating a bad rap for them since they made the jump to consoles, this really is just a symptom of a larger problem which is that the management behind the games has too big a stranglehold on the dev team because of their strict schedule, they've demonstrated in one of the more recent installments that they're perfectly capable of making innovative games without recycling their 30-year old game doc, now however—"
"OH MY GOD."
"REALLY NOW?! You are VERY MUCH CORRECT, however I am still ANGRY that now I have to wait until I can use my favorites, I don't want to just have to wait until I can get a damn TOGEPI to appear in one of the games, as long as they're on this business model I see NO REASON why they wouldn't be able to keep implementing a basic national dex—"
"You like the togepi line?! That's really fortunate! You turned into something you like!"
"HUH?! Well, I SUPPOSE so, I was merely providing examples, but thinking really hard about it and now that I look at myself I suppose it is VERY COOL that I transformed into a togepi who then evolved into a TOGETIC! It's AMAZING how I have WINGS, and I can FLY, and I can do all sorts of magical THINGS, though I sometimes HATE being barefoot with these weird feeling talons among other stuff that I won't ELABORATE ON but now that I'm evolved and I'm used to it I realize that it feels VERY NICE to be a fictional magical white fairy that can spread joy around the world and I never thought I'd ever say that sentence out loud in my life and mean it, though I am EXTREMELY USELESS in direct confrontations and it PISSES ME OFF because I always get in the way unless I'm on item duty, my IVs and Nature probably SUCK ALSO and yes I am using mainline calculations because the PMD ones don't map to reality as well as I would like in practice—"
"So you have, like, Serene Grace?!"
"NO! AFTER PAINSTAKING TRIAL AND ERROR AND DISCUSSING IT WITH SOMEONE ELSE I CAME TO THE CONCLUSION THAT I MOST LIKELY HAVE HUSTLE—"
"I LOVED USING TOGEKISS IN THE GAMES! MAYBE WE CAN TRAIN TOGETHER AND YOU CAN TELL ME WHAT YOU'VE LEAR—"
"I'M GOING TO VERY KINDLY ASK YOU TO BECOME MY BEST FRIEND, I WOULD APPRECIATE IT VERY MUCH!"
...
Togetic's beady eyes blink repeatedly. "U-Uh... n-no! No! I'm really sorry, y-you can't be my best friend! I c-can't call anyone my best friend! Th-that would be very dangerous! I... no... u-um... I-I'll be s-sorting through the coffers in the basement in case any of you need me, bye!"
The bird totters before fully committing to a sprint towards the spiral staircase. His semi-folded wings flapping about almost make him look like a startled chicken.
For a few seconds, nothing could cut through the awkward silence.
"What was that all about?" Gill asks.
"You tell me," his brother replies.
The view from the window at this hour is beautiful in its own right.
Night falls, dyeing the once vibrant vista surrounding the settlement with an oppressive, impenetrable black. Tinges of gold and purple smear the distant sea horizon, a sign of the last vestiges of daylight from the beautiful dusk that shone on the land not too long ago. None but a human can appreciate how beautiful the unpolluted, star-filled firmament above them truly is. Tiny orange lights shimmer and ripple on the town as well, hinting at the modest life lingering in the solitary land...
Meanwhile, the twin canines stare at the single, lone cotton mat and blanket in the middle of their shared musty room.
"I hope you can forgive us!", Lliam had said to them an hour prior. "Team Cozy's cotton ran out! For the time being, we'll make do with what we have. It's a big bed, if it’s any consolation!"
"We never... shared a bed before, have we?" a resigned Bill asks, trying to recall any embarrassing family anecdotes.
"Whatever happened to hay piles, anyway?" Gill indicates as he curiously paws the fluffy mat. From the looks of it, its long width meant that none would be too uncomfortable in it.
Not too much. The blanket would likely be another story, however.
"Something happened, Billy?" the silver-maned growlithe asks, noticing his brother sounding a bit more dry than usual.
"I enjoyed lunch and wanted to thank whoever prepared it,” the other growlithe informs without missing a beat. “I was informed of this... chef who looked like an old blue bear thing. So I went to the kitchen, saw him and said 'excuse me, mister Beast?'. He then looked at me like I wronged him on a deep, personal level. Told me he was tired to meet yet another 'philistine miscreant' like myself. Then he stormed off."
"Pffft!" Gill snickers. "Why did you call him Mr. Beast anyway?"
"THEY TOLD ME THAT WAS HIS NAME! So many people here go by aliases and stupid nicknames, I didn't realize I was being tricked! For all I know, ‘Beast’ could have been his actual name, what else was I supposed to do he—"
Bill ceases his rant when he spots his brother smirking. "What... why are you laughing?"
He immediately notices as he looks down. Without realizing it, he had been walking in circles above the soft bedding, feeling and stomping it with his paws before intending to lay the rest of his body on the mat.
Just like a dog would.
"...good Lord, I'm turning into a fucking loon..."
(...)
It took them a bit of experimentation for them to find a comfortable sleeping position that both accounted for their new body shapes and didn’t make the other one uncomfortable in the bed they were dealt with. It wasn’t too hard, actually—both eventually settled into laying sideways with their backs turned on each other after realizing that the blanket felt redundant for both of them. With the way their skeletons worked now, laying down on the mat without a pillow felt more comfortable than it would have been otherwise. Their tails involuntarily grazing was about the only minor issue they encountered.
“Yeah, Uxie does sound like a smart plan”, Gill continues their conversation as they lay in the cotton surface. “He’s far away from here, if I remember correctly.”
“I’ll find a way to get to him, I’m sure of it,” Bill grumbles.
“...so… you know what that means, right?”
Bill can predict what his brother is going to say next. Not that it was unexpected. “What does it mean…?”
“We need to be strong if we want to survive the trek over there. Good thing we found these guys soon!”
“Really now,” Bill responds in monotone.
“Yeah! If that cool-looking combusken was telling the truth, then we can train around with their resources and travel to Fogbound Lake ourselves in no time. Think about it… in just a couple of months, many humans here got a hold of their bodies. Not all of them, maybe. But we have the potential to go anywhere we want if we put our minds to it, I bet.”
A silence punctuates their conversation. Still facing away from him, Bill shows no signs that he’s going to respond. And so, the Hisuian growlithe continues:
“It’s been difficult, sure. This situation is a bit too… ridiculous to be true. I understand that you’re going to need more time to digest it all. As do I. Just know that I’ll be there to help, okay? I’m staying here at the guild to become stronger if that’s what it takes to meet Uxie.”
“I’m not.”
…
“Huh?” Gill responds.
“We’re only here because we happen to be in a complete stranger’s good graces. We can’t coast off of Lliam’s goodwill for long. Once I can find a stable job for me to do back in Capim, I’ll get out of this place and stay at that inn we found. Then I’ll save up on cash until I can get an exploration team to do the job for us.”
“But… you heard what everyone said, it’s not that hard to become decently strong yourself, KFC told us—”
“Not gonna go through the trouble. And before you say it, no—I’m also not going to become some sort of inexperienced two-bit counselor either. Anyone would be far better off without me making it worse for themselves.”
“Cut this stupid ‘woe is me’ crap, I know better than anyone that you’re passionate for the stuff you've learned and that alone should be enough to make you competent.”
“Whatever you say.”
“You should give this a chance! People here are going to be more understanding here than you’d think! Do you really want to leave them so soon?”
Bill tilts his head and spits out: “If you want to stay in this nuthouse so badly, feel free to do so. Since you’re all sunshine and rainbows despite the fact that you supposedly died today, then I guess that should be okay with you, right?”
…
The silence combined with his brother’s still body fills Bill with regret. His head goes back to laying on the mat again:
“Look, I… I’d rather be left alone for a while, okay? It’s how I’ve been doing things. It has nothing to do with you. I’m sorry.”
…
“Have I done anything wrong to you?” Gill asks.
Something in Bill’s chest sinks.
“No,” the sibling replies. “I told you, it has nothing to do with you.”
For a few seconds, it looks like Gill won’t answer back. His voice then turns duller:
“Back when I was on that car, when I woke up during the crash… in the few precious moments I was afforded before everything faded away, do you know where my thoughts went? What few regrets I could process before everything was over? They weren’t about me being a deadbeat. They weren’t about any plans I had for the future. Hell, they weren’t even necessarily about mom even though she deserved it.
I passed out. Regretting how I could never go back to how everything was before. I thought of you.”
Bill tries in vain to fight back the lump building in his throat.
“You’ve been trying to push me away, haven’t you?” Gill’s voice continues. “Even before all this happened, I mean. Way back when, I wanted to carry on knowing that I could be someone dependable in the future. To not make any missteps anymore. But that didn’t pan out, now did it? Nothing was ever the same again. You continued to drift away. Until one day… I felt like I wouldn’t get to see you anymore.
Imagine what I felt when I woke up this morning like this. And you were there. It’s like… the stupid fantasy I had when I was a kid. Pretty silly how I then had the hunch that I would be the scrappy main character in a video game, whisked away to another realm… and you would be my partner. Heheh… just saying that out loud sounds so stupid. But it became true in a way.
I could… start over, you know?
If you hate me for anything I’ve done, then I’m sorry. I may have looked uncaring with my weird attitude, haven’t I? But no more. Like you said… we’ll live through this inane dream together. I’ll wait until you’re comfortable, I’ll wait until you can find your way around—I won’t ask you to be part of an exploration team. But I want you to know that… even if you don’t want to, I’ll be by your side. I’ll be selfish enough to pester you until I can get to meet the you that I used to know.
And once I do, I’ll know that everything will be alright.”
…
Truth is, Bill had been dreading this very conversation ever since he parted ways with his twin.
No. He did not want to push his brother away. Far from it.
But Bill didn’t deserve him.
He kept placating Gill. Thinking that having the odd phone call here and there meant keeping in touch with each other. But the reality was that Bill wanted to be as far away from him as possible. It didn’t matter if it ended up hurting him—he didn’t deserve a brother like Gill.
And hurt him he did. It was merely a matter of time before Bill realized the extent of his actions.
…
“Gill... I’m the one who should apologize. I was afraid. Afraid of… I don’t even know what, exactly. But I didn’t want to be with you. N-No, I don’t mean it in that way, I mean… I…”
He wants to spill everything. Yet he does not know how. Bill’s heart is not about to burst at the seams. Not today.
“...I’m sorry. I won’t even attempt to justify myself. I was avoiding you, but I won’t do that anymore. And I’m also sorry for snapping at you earlier. I'm sorry for leaving you… I hope…
…I hope you can forgive me.”
…
“I wouldn’t do anything less.”
Aside from occasionally peering each other from time to time, both had remained on their side, their backs facing the opposite direction.
For a while, it stays that way.
Until...
“Gill?”
“Yeah?”
“You said I turned into your partner. Right? When talking about being in an exploration team. Like in those games.”
“Yeah…”
“Well, you’re wrong. I'll be the main character. You'll be the partner.”
Unbeknownst to Bill, his brother is smiling again.
“No. You’re the partner. I’m the main character.”
“Shut up. You’re the partner.”
“No, you.”
“Gill, you’re not ten, are you?”
“You started it!”
Bill feels something strike and scratch his lower back. He turns his head around to see the Hisuian growlithe facing at him, laying on his side with a smug grin. It was definitely his younger brother’s hindpaw that hit him.
“Gill…”
Gill proceeds to kick him again.
“Gill, we’re naked, this feels weird.”
Now two hindlegs kick him.
“You fucker—”
Bill turns around, now scoring a couple of kicks himself on the little bastard. Followed by Gill clawing at him some more. One of them even attempted to bite the other one’s leg. In no time at all, they're exchanging several kicks and swipes between the two.
Once again, everything is alright.