Learning To Communicate Means Learning Things Better Left Unknown
By Penelope Pagan June Sea Witch

The mirror held a caricature of a human. Shock white hair as thick as seaweed, skin the color of rust, Bulging eyes with long horizontal pupils, and lips that took up the majority of her lower face that hid teeth, serrated and deadly. This was not the worst of it, worst was the proportions. The torso was short and wide while the head was a balloon. The arms ended at the knees and the legs were longer than they had any right to be. The body looked like what a child drawing a scary monster might come up with.

This was, apparently, Ursula’s true form. That’s what the mediwitches said anyway, along with how her body would revert back to a regular human with time. It was clear to Ursula that they had transfigured an octopus into a human which had resulted in disturbing consequences. There was no way this was her, ugly and deformed. she longed for tentacles and camouflage.

Ursula turned away from the mirror, prolonged exposure was bad for her mental health. At least she hadn’t died, she kept telling herself, at least I can breathe. They had forced her to stay in this small hospital room after it became clear she wouldn’t stop screaming and that no one knew who she was. They fed calming potions and had tried to reason with her. Ursula had understood them just fine but didn't know how to respond; octopuses didn't talk after all. She had no idea how to manipulate this foreign body into producing speech. Screaming though, that was easy.

There were several weeks where a steady train of healers came into her room each day. They inspected every inch of her, trying to find the source of her screams. It wasn't until finally Deborah suggested she might not even know how to speak that things changed. Instead of a healer, a pale woman came to see her. At the outset Ursula knew she was different.

She stood nearly as tall as Ursula but carried herself with a self assured elegance Ursula lacked. She wore a long emerald green dress with arm-length white gloves and carried a brown satchel. She had even asked permission before entering, a thing no one else had bothered with. Of course Ursula only shrieked at her, but the woman took it for assent. As she crossed the threshold, she gave Ursula a smile which cemented Ursula's suspicions. In that smile she found just the barest hint of death; two barely visible sets of pointed teeth.

Ursula glanced up into the woman's eyes and found that the welling alarm within her was dissipating. All her worries were drowned in the brown iris's of woman. The woman, or whatever it was, took a seat opposite her. Their eyes broke contact as the woman reached down into her satchel to grab something. Ursula immediately tried to bolt out of the room but the woman was too quick for her, somehow appearing in front of the entrance before Ursula could so much as get halfway across the room.

"Now, is that any way to treat a guest?" The woman asked. Her voice was soft, with an edge of mirth. Ursula just stared at her, limbs frozen in fear. The woman rolled her eyes.

"I'm not going to hurt you. In fact, I am here to teach you. So, would you please sit down?" The last phrase hit Ursula with the force of a train. Without even realizing it, she was back at her seat, waiting expectantly for the woman to join her. Her stomach did somersaults and she went pale. There was no escape from this, she was this woman's prey. She only hoped it would be quick. The woman sighed as she sat down.

"They said you were a unique case, but to notice right away, well that is special. Yes, I am a vampire. No, I won't suck your blood. As I said, I am to be your teacher. Wizards know precious little about educational techniques and I have centuries of experience. I am going to teach you how to speak. Nod if you understand." The vampire said.

Ursula gave a tiny nod while looking at the floor. It wouldn't do to get caught in the same trap twice.

"Good, so you can understand me. That will make this easier. My name is Ms. Sutherbee, do you have a name?"

Ursula gave another tiny nod. No one had bothered to ask her before, they simply called her the patient or Jane Doe.

"Could you pronounce it for me, or spell it?"

That gave Ursula pause, her name was Ursula but how did that actually sound aloud? In her head, it just was. There was nothing attached to it. Was it even something a human or vampire say? Octopuses didn't speak after all. She shook her head.

"Hmm, well lets try something. Could you look at this for me?" Ms. Sutherbee asked, pulling another thing out her bag. Ursula didn't look up, she knew this game and wouldn't fall for it. A near death encounter with an angular fish had taught her that much.

"Look up please." Ms. Sutherbee commanded and Ursula found herself looking up. Ms. Sutherbee was holding a card up, there was a drawing of an octopus on it and some weird shapes beneath she didn't understand.

"Do you know what this says?" Ms. Sutherbee asked, tapping at the weird shapes. Ursula was confused, a card couldn't say anything, it wasn't alive. She just shook her head.

"So you cannot read. No matter, we'll just have to pick a nickname for you until you can name yourself properly. Hmm, how about Wolfi? Its a kind of octopus, and it's cute like you." Sutherbee said, giving Ursula a gentle smile. Ursula tried not to think about how that smile was affecting her and focused instead on the name. It was exotic to her ears, but it was much better than Jane Doe. She nodded enthusiastically.

"Well then, Ms. Wolfi, can you try to make this sound for me? Ahhhhh." Ms. Sutherbee said, opening her mouth wide and holding the sound. Ursula opened her mouth and let out a screech.

"relax your throat, don't force it, just let a steady stream of air out." Ursula tried but the result was just another screech.

"Hmm, lets try something. I want you to put your hand up to my mouth."

Ursula didn't move. She was reluctant to get anywhere close to the vampire. The vampire just rolled her eyes again.

"Seriously, I don't bite. Put your hand up to my mouth please." Ursula found herself uncomfortably close to the vampire, her hand hovering just an inch away from the fiends mouth.

"Good, now feel how much air is coming out when I say ah. Ahhhhh." The air coming out of Ms. Sutherbee's mouth was cool to the touch, but it wasn't forceful, rather it was a constant caress of air hitting her hand.

"Okay, now feel how the air comes out when you do it."

Ursula put her hand to her own mouth and said ahh. The air was a furious torrent of warm air.

"Do you feel the difference? Try to get your breath to match mine by push the air out gently."

Now with something tangible to emulate, Ursula managed to bring her shrieks down from a ungodly racket to a soft whine.

"Great job softening your breath Ms. Wolfi, you will be speaking in no time. This next step should be easier. I want you to touch my throat."

Ursula knew there was no point refusing the vampire's directions so she complied without hestitation. Ms. Sutherbee's neck was lifeless, there was no pulse nor heat. It felt like touching a block of ice. She had to restrain herself from flinching.

"Sorry about the cold, not much I can do about that I am afraid. Feel how my muscles are relaxed as i say ah. ahhh."

Ursula only felt the vibration of the vampire's vocal chords, the muscles barely moved.

"See they are relaxed, now you feel your own throat."

Ursula did and found that every muscle became a taut wire as she said ahh. How she had not been aware of the drastic difference was beyond her. She found it much harder to relax her throat than reduce her breath. Her throat was a complex series of interconnect muscles she was barely aware of. She tred and tried until her throat was hoarse. All the while Ms. Sutherbee gently encouraged her to keep trying. Once it was clear no more progress could be made that day, Ms. Sutherbee stood.

"You've made exellent progress Ms. Wolfi, I will be back again tomorrow. Please rest up, no more using your voice for the rest of the day." She said as she walked out the door.

Ursula didn't know how to feel about her encounter with the vampiric teacher. On one hand, she had felt like she was going to die at any moment, the eyes of a predator fixed directly on her. On the other hand, she hadn't been hurt and it would be good to learn how to speak. Then she could ask to be returned to where she belonged. It didn't matter really, how she felt. The vampire would return regardless.

Over the following weeks, Ms. Sutherbee always arrived promptly at nine o'clock and always left by three o'clock. It was a routine that Ursula appreciated and she started to look forward to the daily visits. Ms. Sutherbee eventually got Ursula to produce sound that resembled human speech. It was stilted and awkward, and Ms. Sutherbee took to calling it a fishman's accent. It was a month before Ursula was able to say her first word. Fittingly enough it was "bat." Ms. Sutherbee had giggled when Ursula had pointed to her as she said the word.

Months later and Ursula was capable of saying small sentences. She could ask for things and state opinions. She had immediately asked to go to ocean but the mediwitches had all ignored her. This had frustrated Ursula to no end, what was the point in learning how to speak if no one listened to her? The only person who even pretended to was Ms. Sutherbee, but she had no authority over Ursula's care. Ursula took out her frustration on Ms. Sutherbee, and their lessons became more and more adversarial.

"Ms. Wolfi, please, I understand how you feel but we must continue the lesson." Ms. Sutherbee said in a soothing tone.

"That is not my name!" Ursula said before kicking over her seat.

"well, would you like to find your name then?" Ms. Sutherbee asked. This stopped Ursula in her tracks. She still didn't know how to articulate her name, it simply was, a beacon of self inside of her. She hated that she couldn't say it, that the nurses still referred to her as Jane Doe.

"How?" Ursula said with more than a little desperation.

"I know you don't know how to say your name, but perhaps if I spoke it aloud it would resonate with you. Mind you, this will take a while. There are over 6,000 names in this book alone, and yours might not even be on it." Ms. Sutherbee said as she pulled out a thick book entitled Common Names in the English Language.

Ursula picked her seat back up and sat down. Ms. Sutherbee began to read aloud. The names washed over Ursula, each one interesting in its own right but not her own. By the time three o'clock rolled round, they hadn't even finished the a section. Ms. Sutherbee closed the book.

"Like I said, this will take a while. And once we find it, we may find out who you are." Ms. sutherbee said with a smile. It was meant to be comforting but that scared Ursula. If there was proof she was, as the mediwitches claimed, human, then what was she to do? She only knew how to be an octopus, she had no idea how to be a human. Where would she even go? Who would take care of her? The hospital wouldn't let her stay forever. They should just let her return to the sea, let her forget about all this.

It was a week until Ursula heard it. Her name rang out like a clarion. She was transported to a long ago memory. She was sitting on a woman's lap, the woman's arms wrapped around her. She felt safe and warm. She gazed up into the woman's face and saw love tinged with grief.

"My precious Ursula, never forget, your mother loves you very much." The woman said as tears filled her eyes.

There was a loud bang and the woman turned her head away and Ursula found herself back in her hospital room, bewildered. Ms. Sutherbee was still reading names.

"Ms. Sutherbee, I know my name now." Ursula said, fighting back a storm of emotions that roiled under her skin.

Ms. Sutherbee looked up, a smile replaced by a frown when she was Ursula's face.

"What's wrong Ms. Wolfi? You look upset."

Ursula couldn't address that question. There was simply too much. She knew now, knew that she was a human. She had even seen her mother, had gazed up into her face. It had come crashing in on her without warning, a rough current she was ill prepared for. She buried the feelings within herself, just like she would do when she was hunted. This was not the time to breakdown.

"My name is Ursula." Ursula gritted out. Instead of a congratulations or even a smile, Ms. Sutherbee recoiled in surprise.

"Ursula? Truly? That, that changes things." Ms. Sutherbee said as she hurriedly gathered up her things.

"What do you mean?"

"Ms. Wolfi, I mean Ursula, It's not my place to speculate. But, you could be the same as- well, I shouldn't say." Ms. Sutherbee said in a rush.

"Please Ms. Sutherbee, tell me."

"Well, that was the name of- of he-who-must-not-be-named's child. I must tell someone." Ms. Sutherbee said as she all but ran out of the room.

Ursula sat there, letting this new wave crash over her. She knew, sort of, who that was. She knew they were feared, that even a predator like Ms. Sutherbee feared them. And now, she could be their daughter. Things were so much simpler when she was an octopus.