Kronii straightens her sleeves and looks at the bathroom mirror. She lets out a sigh. There's half an hour left until her stream. She should probably get ready. Kronii heads back to her room.
On her way to her room, Kronii passes by her mom. Once inside her room, Kronii sits in front of her computer. She watches a few Youtube videos to pass the time and then looks over her streaming setup to see if all the settings are as they were before. Kronii finishes her preparations and looks at the clock to see that she still has 11 minutes until the stream. So she waits.
Two minutes pass and it occurs to Kronii that she could be looking at memes on Twitter. She reaches for her phone but decides against it. She waits.
Seven minutes left.
Four minutes left.
Two minutes left.
Twenty-five... twenty-two... ten, nine, eight... four, three, two, one, zero.
Kronii slowly starts to turn on her streaming gear and presses the start button for her stream.
Fully ready, Kronii transitions to her start screen.
"Kroniichiwa!"

"Kroyasumi!"
After four hours of streaming, Kronii ends her stream. Kronii gets up from her seat and heads to the kitchen. There, she boils some water and opens a cup noodle. She pours boiling water in the cup noodle. She stares at the clock on the wall and waits.
Two minutes left.
One minute left.
Kronii finishes her first meal of the day and heads back to her room. Thankfully, she doesn't have much work to do today now that she finished streaming. So she sits back in front of her computer and starts browsing the internet for memes. The hours pass by fast and before she realizes it, it is already way past midnight. Kronii turns off her computer and lies on her bed. She is rather hungry but she'd rather sleep. After some time, Kronii grabs her phone and opens Twitter to browse some memes. The night deepens until it lightens and Kronii falls asleep at 7 AM.
Kronii wakes up and looks at her phone. Two hours before her stream. Kronii spaces out. She has time anyway.
But for how long?
Kronii jolts upright in her bed. She takes in several breaths. She clenches and unclenches her fists. She bites her lips. But the anxiety grows ever stronger. Kronii gets up to open her drawer and reaches in. Kronii heads to the bathroom.
In front of the sink, Kronii rolls up her sleeves. Her heartbeat quickens. She breathes in and slices her wrist.
Kronii watches her blood flow. It flows down her wrist and drips onto the sink. It is a deep red. It is pretty. She loves the color of her own blood. There is no pain. There are no thoughts. Kronii just watches her blood flow.
After a while, she washes up her arm.
Kronii straightens her sleeves to hide her scars and looks at the bathroom mirror. She lets out a sigh of relief. Another day to get through. She can do it. She always has. Today will be no different from yesterday and tomorrow will be no different from today.

It was something so small. She was browsing Twitter as always. Kronii had come across someone thanking her for existing and saying how lucky they are to have met her. But now she is tearing up.
Why would anyone say they are lucky to have met her? She is a coward who longs for her own existence to end but can't pull the trigger herself. She simply waits for something good or bad to happen but nothing ever does. She is a waste of space. She is lazy. A delusional child who fantasizes about being a damsel in distress, a heroine who will be saved by someone else. But she knows. There will be no salvation from this suffering. No one will come to save her. Things won't magically happen, good or bad. There won't be a convenient end to her pain.
Kronii wails.

Kronii knows this is the right thing to do. She stands in front of a building. She looks at the sign on the left.
'COUNSELING'
A few steps from the entrance, and Kronii is frozen in place. What will happen if she goes in? What if she actually doesn't have a problem and she's just over thinking it? If she is diagnosed with something, what will her mom think? What would her friends think? Should she hide the fact she's seeing a therapist? Will she even be fixable? She's been like this for so long, all this seems to be a part of her. Do people really change? Kronii's hands start sweating and she could feel her heartbeats loud in her ears. Maybe she can run away right now. Kronii took a step back.
"No," Kronii muttered under her breath.
"Coward. I've always been running away. Will I run away to the comfort of my own misery once again?"
Kronii takes a step forward. It was her own decision to come here. She has to see it through. Kronii takes another step forward. Sure, she's afraid of what will happen after this, but will it truly be worse than her current situation? What's the worst that can happen to her? Death? Another step.
Kronii is right in front of the building door. She tries to reach for the door but her hands are trembling. She whimpers. She wants to run away.
She wants to run away.
But.
Kronii clenches her trembling hands.
"I am Kronii and I can do this."
Kronii opens the door.